Xiang Liu and Xiao Yao’s Story and Romance

 nathsketch:

What makes me absolutely mad is that I'm the idiot who wasted my time yesterday refuting every single one of their nonsense and they didn't even bother to read it. Or if they did, it wasn't really processed by their brains. 

No need to waste time on toxic people. I bet they don't even read the posts that are essays long lol. It's probably like these gifs:

 Elise:

No need to waste time on toxic people. I bet they don't even read the posts that are essays long lol. It's probably like these gifs:

I'm sure it's exactly like this.

 HeadInTheClouds:

Oh dear! These behaviour are disconcerting and remind me of why I typically don't engage with online discussions. Some people are not satisfied with keeping things contained to the board/forums, they can go searching outside for your social medias - like what happened with Kokuto. And there are nutjobs out there who will doxed people because of online disagreements. Petty and vindictive behaviours that, unfortunately can't be excuse with age since a lot of these people are adults (at least age-wise). Goes to show that while you will grow older, you don't necessarily grow up.

My motto for online and real life interactions is "you can't reason with unreasonable people". If I sense that a civilised/reasonable discussion can't be have, it's best to disengaged. I live by this and  what i called, The Art of Scrolling/Strolling. Just scrolled by until you find someone you can talk to reasonably. 

That's wrong what they did to Kokuto. You can't go digging because you disagree. 

I am too scared to look out engage.

 liddi:

@HeadInTheClouds

Yes, it is interpretative. As I mentioned to @H19279, even the words used for Jing's feelings towards Xiao Yao 喜欢 literally means "like", but can be taken to mean "love". Similarly Xiao Yao's 有情 for Xiang Liu literally means "have feelings" but is also another way of saying "have love". It does not even say on her description that she loves Jing, but we know that their relationship symbol is love relationship/marriage, and we know from the novel that she does love Jing.

At the end of the day, we have the right to interpret it as we see fit, within reasonable contexts of the source material of course. This is a fictional world with fictional characters so there is really no need to launch attacks of a personal nature just because one person sees it differently from another.

These word usage brought me back to our conversation on translation. In my years of watching C-drama, I've picked up the two different words that I often hear used to talk about liking someone. The fist one is "like" and can be used with romantic partner, friends, family member and I think even things. The second one is "love" that tends to be use exclusively with/for romantic partner. Correct me if I'm wrong.

My mother-tongue has 3 words used similar, with increasing intensity of emotion. One of them is used very much exclusively for romantic partner/lover. Is this the same for Mandarin?

As to whether XY loves Jing. Hmm, I plead the fifth 😉. I kid! I do think she loves Jing. For discussion purpose, we can probably dissect and compared depth/intensity of emotions to her feelings for XL etc., but that's neither here nor there really. 

 HeadInTheClouds:

Oh dear! These behaviour are disconcerting and remind me of why I typically don't engage with online discussions. Some people are not satisfied with keeping things contained to the board/forums, they can go searching outside for your social medias - like what happened with Kokuto. And there are nutjobs out there who will doxed people because of online disagreements. Petty and vindictive behaviours that, unfortunately can't be excuse with age since a lot of these people are adults (at least age-wise). Goes to show that while you will grow older, you don't necessarily grow up.

My motto for online and real life interactions is "you can't reason with unreasonable people". If I sense that a civilised/reasonable discussion can't be have, it's best to disengaged. I live by this and  what i called, The Art of Scrolling/Strolling. Just scrolled by until you find someone you can talk to reasonably. 

The only thing that happened to Kokuto is a tantrum throwing moron took a screen shot to share with her fellow idiots.  It's cool.

That said, you are entirely correct.  One should always be careful online and in person with the people you deal with.  I learned this working with the public.  But that goes both ways.  They know absolutely nothing about me ... except the character I connect with is a horrible "toxic abuser," a "sadist,"  a killer -- and often uses a very affable persona.

Also correct.  It isn't about reasonable, so don't waste your time responding.  Steer clear.  Don't roll in the mud and you won't get dirty.

And this conversation really doesn't belong in this awesome thread, so I'll move my other replies to the more 'chat' oriented thread.

@Kokuto

I'm glad that you are all Ok, and things didn't get completely out of hand. I did see a lot of behaviour that we mentioned previously here, people sitting on their moral high horse and passing moral judgement on others for enjoyment a piece of fiction/entertaining. There's really no civil discussion to be have here since they have already deemed themselves to be superior and correct. 

Lots of like minded people here to share your love and enjoyment of XL with. It's not worth getting grey hair and wrinkles over these petty squabbles. Botox is really expensive!!!! 😁

 blimarch:

On a personal basis, being hypersensitive myself, and the novel containing mature and triggering content, teenager me would have been inconsolable and quite disturbed. I wouldn't have been able to understand the hidden meanings beyond the literal meaning of the text, especially since the facts (XL death,...) are ultimately implacable and irrevocable. To be honest, I'm not proud to admit it but even as an adult, I almost threw up when I read the last few chapters and was shaken to the core. I remember being very angry, revolted and shocked by the novel, wishing I'd never read it

You are right. Tong Hua's historical novels are classified under romance genre, but the books are far more than that, with themes and narratives that can often be difficult and painful to process, and subtexts that require the readers to read between the lines or interpret. Her characters are often not clear cut and to describe them simplistically as a certain type is a disservice to the nuances that she imbues in them. In addition, more often than not, she leads the readers slowly and surely down a painful, inevitable path as they wish desperately for a last minute reprieve that never comes, towards an end that leaves them reeling from devastation and shock, a haunting conclusion that makes it truly difficult to move on.  It is definitely not material that can be easily handled even by more mature readers, much less younger ones. Which makes me think that perhaps books too require some form of age recommendation, similar to the visual medium.