My Stand-In (2024)

Why can't people seem to appreciate flawed characters?

This review won't be a review per say but moreso another perspective of the show when compared to the majority of the negative reviews on this site. I feel the need to do this especially because a handful of these reviews almost made me decide not to watch this show. I won't go into a lot of details regarding the storyline since so many reviews have already done so. However, I'd like to leave my two cents here because most of the reviews shown here are negative and most of them are based on two things - Joe's naivety and Ming's toxicity.

One thing about this series is that it depcts toxic relationships with very flawed characters. It's been advertised since the beginning, it's based in an infamously toxic chinese novel (by an author who's well known for her toxic main leads), there's sinopsis, tags, trailer, etc. And yet people still seem to be hiper fixated in complaining about it, as if it hasn't been advertised at all.

Don't like these themes? Don't watch.

This is the same issue with Kinnporsche (which has two directors in common). So many people review bombing with negative ratings regarding the toxic storyline. There was even a review that complained so much and at the end considered this one of the best series of this year - giving this a 6. At least be coherent with your words and your scoring.

I understand the issue people have with Ming, he's an obvious red flag who is toxic from the beginning, a very flawed character who is depicted since the beginning as such. Flawed characters have existed in stories, series and movies for a long time and oftentimes they give way to intrigue storylines and help capture the viewers attention to try to understand how this person behaves the way they do. Flawed characters are real and human and I don't understand how so many people fail to appreciate that this type of representation is needed in art too. Yes, Ming is a huge asshole and a toxic narcissist. That makes him an even more compelling main character.

As for Joe, he's an absolute cinammon roll. He's someone who falls in love with someone he shouldn't. I see so many people stating how he's naive for liking Ming and that it's not realistic. Excuse me? How many people end up in toxic relationships despite the clear signs? How many people fail to see the red flags because of the rose-colored glasses? It's as realistic as it can get. Fortunately, My Stand-in still manages not to be as toxic as some relationships in real life get - and not as toxic as the original novel, thankfully. I feel like this show actually managed to tell the story really well, they allowed for Ming's character to grow and for Joe to realize that no matter how much he tried, he couldn't escape his feelings for Ming.

Sure, y'all can say Joe's dumb - he is. But it feels weird to reduce his feelings and struggles to just that - naivety and stupidity. Joe and Ming are such complex characters and to reduce this complexity to just being dumb or toxic is like missing the whole point of the show. The story isn't told just by dialogue or just by nc scenes. There's so many small details the directors focused on to conect the storyline. The actors were amazing too, the change in Up's eyes depending on Ming's emotional stability in different parts of the show was mesmerizing to watch - he's such a great actor. Poom was also absolutely amazing as Joe, reflecting his emotional maturity before and after his death.

Flawed and difficult characters are extremely complex. They're harder to understand, harder to act and harder to love. It's a challenge for the actors involved in these storylines and it's a challenge for the whole team. Yet, they're the most intriguing, the ones that make our brains work to understand, to fill in the blanks. There's a reason why we love villains. It's the same train of thought. Flawed characters are relatable, even if only a tiny little bit. Sure, in Ming's case, I really hope he's not as relatable to everyone out there, but there's realism to his character, like it or not.

This is why I don't understand the hate. I understand the constructive criticism and I have my own too, but to review bomb a show like this based on something it has advertised since the beginning? I don't get it.

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Joe Needs To Be Slap With A Rubber Chicken

What annoys me the most is that, Ming put Joe through hell, all because he was in love with a guy who acts like he sniffs glue and sells hair nets on e-bay.

That being said. There must have been a 2-for-1 special on stupidity, cuz Joe sure bought a whole lot.

CHARACTERS:
Listen. Joe is a bummer. He makes sadness look pathetic. He’s like that friend who always ruins the mood whenever you ask them how they’re doing:

ME: Oh, hey, friend, how was your day?

Bummer Friend: Nothing much. My cat is in therapy. I wanna get a perm, but I don’t think I have the face for it. My parents threw me out so I’m living under a bridge now, and I got hit by a bus last week and died. 😑

Sure, sure, we can argue that Joe is pathetic because he couldn’t catch a break, and every time he did, it was at the expense of his self-respect, but damn… the dude just bummed me out. So much that when he died the second time, I was chewing on my popcorn like:

ME: Oh, noo, dude…you like, got shot and stuff…you rolling down the stairs dude…is you dead again?... (Side note: Did they really have to make him roll down the stairs like that? It was just sad.)

And yes, we all love/hate a no-self respecting, pathetic love-sick fool character. The only reason I watched ‘Theory Of Love’ was that bathroom scene where Gun's character got his heartbroken, and he was crying under the shower, but the water stopped, so he had to use bottled water. I laughed like there was no tomorrow, then went and made popcorn so I could binge-watch the rest of the series, and judge him through the screen.

So yeah, throughout the series whenever Joe did anything dumb, which was every time he opened his mouth. I went:

ME: Yayy, go on honey, be a dumb-ass, stay with that dude who took your virginity and can’t even remember it, and refers to you as a ‘stand in’, because he’s in love with a guy built like a Minecraft table.

Some of the things Joe did, and allowed Ming to do to him, busted my mind. And what do you mean he DIED again because of TONG! TONG!!!  I understand if it was like for a person person, but Tong? Come on son! Do-gooders should come with a ‘self-sacrificing idiot’ forehead tag or something, cuz... Bishes be crazy!

And sure, Joe was a tortured, handsome fella who needed love, But, Joe, Joe, oh Joey, Jojo, Jeremiah, Josephina. To quote Earth from Moonlight Chicken: ‘How you gonna be poor, gay and dumb at the same time, child?.’ He suffered so much because… *check notes*

1. He had no family. (His dream was for someone to turn on the lights in his house.)
2. He had (1) friend. (And that friend wanted to get into his pants, but yaay friendship, right?)
3. He was a ‘stand-in’ boyfriend(eff buddy?). (Sure Ming hit him in the head with a baseball bat, kidnapped him, chained him up, caused him to fall off a cliff and die, but hey, at least they had his-and-his mugs. So, awwww love.)

I don’t even know what to say about Joe. Do I dislike the character, I guess not, because he’s too sad to even dislike. I just couldn’t get over all the dumb decision he made… **check notes** again:

1. Gave his virginity to Ming who was drunk off his arse
2. Asked Ming to move in with him so he could turn on his lights for him.
3. Died, came back, and went straight to Ming to be his stand-in ho. He wasn't even the main ho at that point, he was like a stand-in ho, for a stand-in ho.
4. Accepted Ming’s broke arse! (Dude, you are poor, how you gonna take care of him and your sick fake mom?)
5. Got kidnapped (again) and beaten for TONG. TONG!!
6. Died again so he can protect Ming. (You know, the guy who treated him like used slippers.)

I kept screaming, ‘No, girl, no, no!’ every time he made another dumb decision. Homeboy gets a second chance, complete with a whole new face and everything. And I thought he was gonna move cities, start over, join a local church or something but, the mfer was like:

JOE: Well…the thing is…you know…Ming glued the mugs together, you know the one I broke when he mistook me for his sister’s husband, who he’s in love with? Haha… he has changed… he wears old lady blouses, and wants to keep me as his ho… in exchange for money, so… yeah, *in love noises*

ME: This dumb-ass mother… *throws chair**

For one split second I thought he'd finally learned something, because he was like : "No Ming, this second chance is mine!" (Only to immediately proceed to try and get out of a moving car.) A moving car. Like???? And after all that yelling and 'Ming forget the old Joe, this body doesn't love you', homeboy didn't even make it half way down the traffic light!

And while he was talking about 'If you loved the old Joe why did you make me your paramour.' my arse was rolling my eyes at the screen going 'dude stop using that fancy arse word, use your government name, yous is a ho. A stand-in ho.'

Joe just vexes me! Every time he gives Ming those poppy dog in-love eyes I go.
Child! Child! Stop, Run. You must be a special brand of stupid to die, get a second chance, then go straight to the person who caused your death. JUST, WHY?? ARE YOU OKAY?

At this point, I’m gonna console myself by believing that Joe is color blind, cuz there’s no rational reason as to why he returned to Ming a second time. WHY??? And in the finale he’s talking about 'I forgive you, forgive yourself, I’ll always choose you cuz I don’t know what I’ll live for if not for you?' ‘CHILD! How about your fake mom? huh? How about living a life where you are not afraid your partner will hit you upside the head with a bat??’

You know what, eff Joe! My blood pressure can’t.

But like, Poom is an amazing actor!! Most bl actors looks like they are laughing or sniffing glue whenever they cry, but Poom was different. Even his eyes could act. Beautiful talented man. But Joe though, the bummer can go hug a tree.

Okay, on a side note, are we going to ignore the fact that, that woman’s son died and she didn’t even got to mourn? Sure, Joe is a good son to her and whatnot, but damn, homeboy took over that body with zero guilt.

—
MING. oh, MING.

HAHAHA. Some people talking about, ‘Girl, Ming is such a RED FLAG. AND???!’ HAHAHA. My sister, even if na red sea, I go still take cup drink ‘em!

Cuz we love drama in this house. And Ming, oh Ming, talk about a guy you wanna punch under a mistletoe. My anger when it came to him was unhealthy. Do I wish he go bury himself in a hole at the centre of the sun and die? Sure. Is his toxic arse gonna make me add this drama to one of my favs? HECK YEAH.

Listen. Ming, like an old rag, deserves to be taking out every spring and beaten. This little guy, who acts like the world bothers him (I just remembered Joe let a collage? graduate drive him off a cliff.) mistreated our gentle soul Joe, because he saw someone’s back in a mall one time. I mean, how you gonna fall in love with Tong, your sister’s boyfriend, who looks like a dollar store bubblehead?

Ming was so toxic and for what? TONG? The guy who used his unborn child as a bargain? The guy who on so many occasions broke your heart. TONG!

And after everything Ming did, the writers gave him like two ‘redeemable’ scenes, changed one red traffic light into green, said sorry under some shooting star, made him wear those silly cute aprons, and expected me to forgive him. LMAO I’m not Joe, I’m not gonna come back and let him eff me again. One time is enough!

But they almost got me in the finale though ^^. With all the smiling, crying and shooting stars, and tiny clay pots and aprons… but I stood my ground like. ’No, you will not get me to forgive Ming, not today Satan!’ So yeah, eff the tiny pot , apron, and the shooting stars, I’mma still hold on to my hatred.

Also, how in the hell did Ming manage to stop Joe from opening that afterlife door? Mfer is next level of toxic. He was like: 'Bish, where you think you going, I'm not done with you. If you don't get your arse back in here.' Poor Joe, the devil works hard, but Ming works harder.

UP did so well with this character, because I see UP on my fyp on tiktok and I grin and coo and go, bestest boy. But the moment Ming shows up on screen I wanna throw tiny rocks into his eyes and push him off a small cliff.

TONG
Hmm. Ha. Hmhm. Haha. Hahaha. HAHAKAHBIERJWOJFWNF. AHHHHHHHHHHH. GAWDDD, sure Ming deserves to be poke in the eye with a sharp object, but TONG deserves to be slap repeatedly with a glove, then you know, kicked into that black hole at the centre of the milky way. Eff that dude!

And ,and, after all he did, he got no retribution whatsoever!! I swear, this world is not fair. And the last episode wanted me to feel happy for him, but he’s smiling and I’m rolling my eyes like:, ‘Happiness don’t even look right on him, dude out here looking like the inside of a pencil case. Arrgggg, take a long nap under that pool, please!!’

Somewhere out there in drama world, Tong is happy with his wife and chubby son, and I wish he steps on a lego every time he smiles. And he chokes every time he drinks. XDD

SOL:
Now tell me why every time this dude popped up, I went, ‘My brother, my brother, go sit somewhere, this ain’t about you!’ LMAO. Sure he was an o-kay-ish friend, but he was like a tiny red-flag with a green wrapping, so shifty, looking like that one lizard in ‘SING!’

In the finale when he took his sorry-arse bag and got into the car with the stranger, I was like: ‘Sure, dude, get kidnap and die. See if I care.’ So, yeah, I wish him all the best, I guess.

PLOT
Interesting concept, I am tempted to read the book I heard this was based on. I think the actors did what they were supposed to. I hated and liked them accordingly, so they did their job well.

THINGS THAT DIDN’T MAKE SENSE
- Joe’s fighting skills going away whenever he needed it
- Writers trying to make us forgive Ming
- Joe literally letting himself be kidnap for TONG
- TONG being a popular actor. (Like, did that dude ever shoot enough scenes to make a finish drama?)
- TONG being forgiven!! Seriously??? Nothing?

THINGS THAT MADE SENSE
**Crickets**
Edit: 07/10/24 : I found a scene that made sense. The chicken fight between Sol and Ming. SKSKSKS, it didn't make sense, but it also made sense, and Joe just being the ignored third party made it so fun to watch. Upon rewatching, my ratings have gone up, Joe's eyes deserves a whole star, like they were acting more than the actor himself XD

Anyway, I might write more later on the finale, especially on the family, but for this review I just wanted to vent my frustration with Joe.

All in all, one of the best shows this year, up there with Unknown.

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