Duty First, Kiss Later Episode 5

Shu is very decisive, he knows what he wants…

Shu is very decisive, he knows what he wants he goes for it, but if he thinks feelings aren't reciprocated he is fast to cut things off.& maybe Takoi needed that wake-up call. even though i don't blame him, he hasn't come out to himself & isn't 100% comfortable being around Shu, in a romantic way - when they just hanging out in a platonic way he is fine, but the sec he sense tension he takes a step back & that's why i aint shocked or even bothered, about how he was fast to deny the allegations of him finally coming out. i get Shu, but he should be more understanding given everything i pointed out, as i am sure he noticed too - 1st hand, so why not have a conversation, instead of deciding for Takoi ??? oh well guess he is cutting his losses. this started off so cute & sweet only to end on a sour note... ugh

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Sometimes Love Arrives Too Late, Episode 5 Hit Me So Hard

At the beginning of Episode 5, I thought I was going to get something sweet and beautiful.Imagine the person you have quietly loved for so long finally asks you on a date. To the aquarium. You have never been to one before, so you become determined to make it special. You spend countless hours studying everything you can about sea life. You learn the ages of the turtles, the strange little garden eels, the jellyfish that are 95% water and have no brains or emotions, and the penguins whose complicated relationships somehow involve cheating and affairs. You learn all of it, not because you suddenly love marine biology, but because you want to impress the person you love. You even buy a matching pair of pens, something small and ordinary, but precious because it belongs to both of you. And for a moment, it feels like maybe this is finally becoming something real.When Takoi holds Shiono's hand, they both feel the weight of that moment. But love is never experienced in the same way by everyone watching. In a society where same sex relationships can still be judged, even something as innocent as holding someone's hand can become something frightening. Even at the police station, Takoi denies that the matching pen came from Shiono. He says someone else gave it to him. Shiono hears him. The words are quiet, almost unbearable to hear, but what comes next hurts even more.At the bar, his friends tease Takoi about going to the aquarium on a date with another man. Cornered by their questions and the pressure surrounding him, Takoi says that he only asked Shiono out because he looked lonely. He says he would never date a man. He says he is not a creep. Perhaps he was frightened. Perhaps he was embarrassed. Perhaps he had never been in this situation before and simply did not know how to face the eyes of society. Perhaps he did not mean any of it. But sometimes, words do not need to be meant to destroy something. They only need to be heard by the person who loves you.Shiono hears everything. Takoi does not realise that he is standing outside, listening. He does not realise that every word is breaking the heart of the person who had spent so much time learning about the ocean just to have something to talk about with him. So Shiono quietly walks away, alone, into the cold and darkness, drinking by himself while carrying a heartbreak that Takoi does not even know he has caused.Takoi apologises, and perhaps he truly was under pressure. Perhaps he was scared. Perhaps he had never experienced feelings like this before. Perhaps he was simply trying to protect himself from a world that still tells people who they are allowed to love. But apologies cannot always undo what has already been heard. Shiono tells him that he does not care what people think of him, but that does not mean the words did not hurt. Because it was not society that said those things to him. It was Takoi. The person he loved.And then Shiono says something that makes everything even more heartbreaking. The timing is perfect. He is transferring. Maybe this is what love sometimes is. We spend so much time worrying about what people will think, what society will say, what we are supposed to be, and what we are supposed to feel. And while we are looking everywhere else, we fail to see the person standing right in front of us. Until they are gone. And only then do we realise how much space they occupied in our hearts.Maybe gender never mattered. Maybe society never mattered. Maybe all the fear, all the expectations and all the judgement were never as important as we believed. Because when the person you love walks away, the only thing left is your heart asking the question you should have answered long ago. Why did I let the world become more important than you?

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