Xiang Liu and Xiao Yao’s Story and Romance

 HeadInTheClouds:

And yes, if you fall in love with another person, that is a betrayal. If you say to someone whose partner had fallen in love with another person, "It's no big deal, you shouldn't feel betrayed, as long as they still also love you", chances are high that you'll get punched in the face. The only people who wouldn't feel betrayed are those who no longer love their partner.

I think it really depends on the circumstances. 

In your scenario, the two lovers in questions are partners. That means they've committed to one another.

In this case, XY's feelings for YSQ and XL began in QS town. She may have been completely oblivious to her feelings for XL (not how I interpret it) or she may have had some inclining of her feelings but denied them / tried to suppress them at first. After breaking up with TSJ, her denial lessened a bit over time, to the point where she sent the ice crystal globe to XL in chapter 31. A bid that he did not accept. Since XY never made any commitment to XL to love him or to be with him (at least not any that he accepted), her feelings for TSJ were not a betrayal of any commitment to XL. 

Plus XL was aware of XY's developing relationship with TSJ from the start, and from chapter 22 on he actively pushed her to be with TSJ, and pushed her away from himself. The fact that XY's feelings for TSJ grew after that point... it's a bit much to call that a betrayal of XL if XL intentionally contributed to it.

Also, IMO, whether someone feels betrayed and whether they have actually been betrayed are two separate questions. 

 AH :

Also, IMO, whether someone feels betrayed and whether they have actually been betrayed are two separate questions. 

It is not XY's mind or XL's mind which judges if it is betray. It is the bug's judgment and I am pretty sure that the bug is very single minded

This discussion is referred to the addition in the drama of 

"The love poisonous bug demands not only your life but your heart. You have nine lives, but only one heart. Once your heart is given, you can never take it back." 

And ".Mostly women raise it for their lovers, hoping for a love that is devoted (one heart, one mind), never betraying each other."

Some find this extra information complies with the novel content. (it gives clearer interpretation of the bug- 1 heart 1 mind as said in the original text)

 H19279:

He did it himself. He said to everyone that he came there on his own private interest (for his lover, don't remember exactly) but he could not betray to Shen nong. So, he put nail on critical points of half body which is for Shen-nong. 

Hmmm. Complicated. 

 H19279:

Chang Pu wanted to stay with Chang Yi (she led 5000 Ruomu soldiers, joining Chang Yi, she was leader of that group). Chang Pu and Chang Yi loved each other very much, She wanted to be his side in life and death regardless of the responsiblity to her own soldiers. Chang Yi made her unconcious and told Ah Heng and Chi you take her and her troop out of the firing battle.

That sequence of events with Chang Pu makes sense. I didn't realize Ah Heng was able to speak with Chang Yi before he died, and that she rescued Chang Pu, who was with him, after that. That really shows that Chang Yi also could have survived, as XY thought in chapter 35. According to her, he chose to stay behind because he didn't want to abandon his sense of camaraderie with his soliders. Was that because some of his men couldn't escape? Or by staying behind, did he and a small number of other soldiers make it possible for most of his men to escape / be rescued?

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Chapter 35:

Xiao Yao couldn’t imagine, but she understood what Xiang Liu felt. Her Fourth Uncle could have survived that day, and he did love Fourth Aunt and Zhuan Xu, but he chose to die alongside his soldiers. In this world there was camaraderie so strong that one would die rather than abandon it.

 H19279:

It is not XY's mind or XL's mind judge if it is betray. It is the bug's judgment and I am pretty sure that the bug is very single minded

 windiaaa041293:

@AH

Isn't what we're talking about Lovers BUG. So it has nothing to do with whether someone feels betrayed or not. But it's clear Lovers bugs don't want any betrayal. So what we're talking about is GU, not the person.

Yes, the bug or the spell itself is the decider of when the hosts have turned on each other to the point that it would cause the bugs to turn into Heartbreak Bugs. But according to what criteria? 

It sounds like you take the view that the bug in XY is constantly assessing whether all the love and affection that she had in her heart for other people was purely platonic or not, and if it detected any romantic feelings for another person that rose to the level of love (and not whatever lesser feeling you view her as feeling for TSJ), the bug would then turn into a Heartbreak Bug. And if XL's efforts to push XY towards TSJ had resulted in her feeling romantic love for TSJ, it would have killed them both. That seems quite silly to me. 

I don't know exactly what would constitute the hosts "turning on each other" to the point where the bugs would turn into Heartbreak Bugs, since it didn't happen in the novel (edit: and XY kissing and wanting to marry YSQ was not enough to trip the trigger). But IMO, a host merely having some romantic feelings for another person in their heart (while still having the necessary romantic love for the other host) would be a silly trigger. I wouldn't view that as one host turning on the other in every case. 

 AH :

edit: and XY kissing and wanting to marry TSJ was not enough to trip the trigger). But IMO, a host merely having some romantic feelings for another person in their heart (while still having romantic love for the other host) would be a silly trigger. I wouldn't view that as one host turning on the other in every case

I remember you used to say that if her love for XL unchanged then it still fulfilled the requirement of the bug. However, you believe it's still possible to love other one.

I think some of us believed something similar, the only difference that whole heart is devoted for that one love. And action generated from rational mind may not trigger the back-fire of the bug. 

Actually the more I read, the more I found the feeling XY for Jing was not love from heart. That feeling, need of him came from her need her hope for long term accompany which was originated from her fear of being abandoned. I said in the past that I found many event with Jing could be driven from her brain/mind. But it's hard to deny a kind of love when she half-conscious and called for Jing when seeing hibiscus flower in chapter 44. Later,  @windiaaa041293 told me that hibiscus linked to XL (first I didn't believe). I did digging myself and found the hibicus linked to FFB, she called Jing but she got relieved after hearing the heartbeat. throughout the running with Left Ears, she only thought of XL and FFB. When she woke up, no asking of Jing.

She carried the claim pearl lamp everywhere. It was placed next to her bed. She closed it before sleeping everyday. Whom did it remind? does the sound when closing it similar to the sound she heard during 37 years when everyday XL came and left. 

The sorrow and depression that she suffered from chapter 25 till chapter 31 was from whom? Because Jing betrayed her trust. FFYY got pregnant so her hope shattered or also because FFB said she graduated, didn't need to take lesson and later FFB told her woman should not follow him, best ending for soldier was on battle field and when they farewelled he looked cold, lonely as mountain in the north. (she had feeling of losing FFB). She tried to forget the pain by going to Gaoxin (seemed to get better but CX forced her to go back). She had full memories with FFB in Zhiyi, Zhe province (not with Jing) thus she didn't go anywhere, being lazy the whole day and became completely off mood when Yellow emperor asked about FFB.  

XY told Miao Pu that she never dreamed of Jing? But a moment before she woke up from a dream and felt as if someone opened the window. She said 'Jing, is that you (or sth like that)". She dreamed of someone who came from the window - it was FFB. So she covered up her secret by using "Jing". She cried after dreaming and many time became more sorrow after dreaming. Who did she dream of actually? So, we have to be very careful with what XY said because she had mouthful of lies.  

 AH :

Rather than interpreting it to mean that mostly ruthless and vindictive women raise these bugs for their lovers hoping that their love will be devoted, but also wanting to have the bug at the ready to kill her lover if he ever does betray her. 

never betray EACH OTHER, not only betray her. I don't think the conversation focused on the sharing pain. It's XY's misunderstanding of the bug which she aimed for contain XL due to her reckonlessness. Witch king also empharized on the good aspect of the bug is to save life, helping each other. 

why did men rarely raise it? they are allowed to marry multiple women. and normal woman is supposed to be loyal to her husband. Maybe Jing would like to have one. =))

We finally reach the death scene, which incorporates his internal monologue from the epilogue, with minor changes to make up for the chart of the ocean not being adapted in the drama. 

I have read the narration of this scene in the novel countless times in the past, but revisiting it after the leaked scenes of the Shen Nong army brings fresh tears to my eyes. What the leaked script did well was to give a voice to Hong Jiang and the previously faceless Shen Nong soldiers, providing glimpses into their lives, leading up to the last day, so much so that now their deaths hurt that much more. 

And Xiang Liu's death will never not hurt.

Leaked script Ep20 scene 14 - Xiang Liu's death scene

The desolate slopes of the mountain in the wilderness outside Qingshui town was strewn with dead Shen Nong soldiers, blood-splattered, torn banners mounted on the corpses. All around was the brutal, bloodied aftermath of war.

On the peak of the mountain, the Xuan Yuan soldiers closed in on the last man standing, Hong Jiang. Although he had tremendous spiritual power, he had reached the end of his tether, and was covered in wounds. Ru Shou stood at the side, personally directing the battle formation. The general beside him stared at the stubborn resistance of Hong Jiang with a lament of regret.

General: We have cornered Hong Jiang for six days and six nights. Who would have thought he is still able to fight.

Ru Shou had other things on his mind, his eyes expectant, as if he had not heard what was said. Chishui Xian hurried over with a group of soldiers and gave her report.

CSX: Great General, my pursuit along the Southwest direction revealed no sign of Xiang Liu.

Just as she finished speaking, Gou Mang led another group of soldiers and hurried over.

GM: Great General, my pursuit along the Southeast direction showed no trace of Xiang Liu.

Yu Jiang and Li Yuan rushed over along with their soldiers.

YJ: Great General, We have completed the search in the Northeast and Northwest. There is no sign of Xiang Liu.
RS (meditative): If Xiang Liu wanted to escape with his life, he would have left long ago, and not wait until now...

Ru Shou turned to look at the ambushed Hong Jiang with a contemplative expression. As Hong Jiang's spiritual powers depleted, the soldiers surrounding him drew closer and closer. In no time, they would break through Hong Jiang's defenses and take him down. Suddenly, Ru Shou sensed something was off.

RS (shouted out the order): Stop! Everyone retreat immediately.

Puzzled, all the soldiers came to a halt before making their retreat warily. A regretful look flashed across Hong Jiang's face.

RS: Prepare bows and arrows. Attack only from afar, do not approach.

Gou Mang, Yu Jiang, Li Yuan and Chishui Xian each occupied a position with their troops, armed with bows and arrows, sealing off any means of escape for Hong Jiang.

RS: Xiang Liu, we come face to face at last after battling for so long. Why don't you reveal your true form to us?

Hong Jiang revealed his true face. It was Xiang Liu indeed. His awe-inspiring reputation struck all the soldiers with such terror that they drew back involuntarily.

RS: It is you after all.
XL: Great General has extraordinary intelligence and resourcefulness. I am impressed.
RS (wry smile): In the presence of Xiang Liu, I am ashamed to lay any claim to intelligence and resourcefulness. If we were evenly matched in terms of circumstances and military might, I cannot compare to you. (solemn) Now, the Xuan Yuan Great army is everywhere, and there is no means of escape. Why don't we set aside the past, and have a good talk. As long as you are willing, I am authorised by His Majesty to promise you a princedom, a life that is carefree and unfettered.
XL (his eyes coldly swept over the dead bodies of the Shen Nong soldiers that covered the ground): Back then, if Gao Xin and Xuan Yuan had been locked in a fight to the death where the Gao Xin kingdom was destroyed, would Lord Ru Shou have surrendered when Cang Xuan offered great rewards in exchange for your fealty?

Glancing at the bodies of the dead Shen Nong soldiers, Ru Shou fell silent.

XL (faint smile): Since Lord Ru Shou, you yourself could not do it, why take the trouble to make things difficult for me?

Ru Shou looked at Xiang Liu wordlessly, respect, admiration and regret in his gaze.

XL (noting the Xuan Yuan soldiers all around him, sighing): As expected from the Gao Xin king's top disciple, Lord Ru Shou's powers of observation are exceptional! If you had been just one step late, all the soldiers would have been trapped in my kill formation.

On the heels of his words, Xiang Liu smiled and gathered his spiritual power. Snowflakes danced in the air, and a blood line formation resembling the squares of a chessboard emerged. Each time he bled from his injuries, he used his own blood as a medium to set up a formation, planning to wipe out Ru Shou and his men in one fell swoop. Thousands of blood lines criss-crossed each other as if it were alive, strangling everything in its wake from rocks to vegetation, not sparing even a blade of grass.

The soldiers who cornered "Hong Jiang" earlier were filled with terror, and scrambled to retreat.

RS (yelling): Fire!

Ju Mang, Yu Jiang, Chishui Xian and Li Yuan commanded their armies and tens of thousands of arrows were released. Some were caught in the blood lines and destroyed, others passed through the blood lines and hit Xiang Liu. However, his ferocity did not diminish, but intensified. His six-headed demon form appeared in the sky while the blood lines transformed into a criss-crossing formation that spread outwards, killing many Xuan Yuan soldiers. In an instant, howls and screams resounded across the land.

RS (yelling): Fire!

Their faces tense, Gou Mang, Yu Jiang, Chishui Xian and Li Yuan commanded their armies to continue shooting the arrows.

Countless arrows breached through the formation, hitting Xiang Liu, and the six heads in the sky collapsed one after another in death, a tragic sight.

At last, Xiang Liu died, but his expression was unmoved, his body remained upright, standing tall.

There was destruction everywhere they looked, and fear was etched on all their faces, not daring to move, warily fixing their eyes at Xiang Liu.

GM (softly): Senior brother, is he... is he dead?
RS (with great respect): He is dead.

Ju Mang and the rest breathed a long sigh of relief, as if a heavy burden had fallen off their shoulders.

GM: As expected of the Nine-Headed Devil, despite being besieged by Senior brother for six days and six nights, at the last moment, he still almost wiped us out.

One of the soldiers howled in grief.

Soldier: Tear Xiang Liu's body into a thousand pieces as a sacrifice to our comrades who died in battle!

Chishui Xian stared at Xiang Liu, eyes filled with hatred, intending to advance. Many of the soldiers also started to move.

RS (shouted out the order): Get back here! (stern) No matter what your vendetta is with Xiang Liu, he is an enemy worthy of respect. Anyone who dares to desecrate the body will be punished according to military law!
CSX: Yes.

Chishui Xian drew back stony-faced along with the rest of the soldiers.

Ru Shou faced the body and bowed in respect. As he rose, he noticed poisonous black fog emitting from Xiang Liu's body, dissolving all in its path.

Chishui Xian and those who intended to desecrate Xiang Liu's body earlier were terrified and thankful for their narrow escape. Yu Jiang's face reflected his fear as well.

RS: We can't stay here for long. Retreat immediately!

With that, Ru Shou led his army and evacuated from the area.

GM (lament): Xiang Liu had the intelligence and sufficient cruelty. It's a pity... it's a pity!

The only one left on the slope of the mountain was Xiang Liu, white robes torn and bloodstained, quietly standing in the midst of the poisonous black fog billowing on the ground. Xiang Liu's face was peaceful, his eyes downcast with lips curved in a faint smile, gazing at something between his fingers. A spotless, crystal-clear pearl was held between his fingers, his eyes filled with tenderness.

The black fog grew thicker and thicker, dissolving everything in the vicinity. Xiang Liu's body slowly collapsed, and the pearl between his fingers transformed into a string of tears, falling down drop by drop on Xiang Liu's face.

XL (VO): Xiao Yao, I still remember our first encounter at the outskirts of Qingshui town. You were grinning cheekily, with a mouth full of lies. The only truth you said was, "I have no ability to protect myself, no one to rely on, no place to go." With decades of archery skills, you now have the ability to protect yourself, and need no longer only be able to use your own body to protect those you wish to protect in times of danger. With a lover you wish for, you now have someone to rely on, and need no longer be alone, with solitude as your companion. Part of your body flows blood from a nine-headed demon, so you can freely roam in the vast oceans; you now have a place to go, and need no longer be pursued by others, with no place to call home. Xiao Yao, from here on, I can no longer watch over and protect you. You must look after yourself well. Wishing you a lifetime of carefree peace and happiness!

[Flashback]
In the army camp, Wen Xiao Liu telling Xiang Liu he had no ability to protect himself, no one to rely on, no place to go.
Fangfeng Bei standing high in the sky, watching Xiao Yao use her body to protect Cang Xuan.
Fangfeng Bei teaching Xiao Yao archery on the mountain plains at the outskirts of Xuan Yuan city.
At the road in Qingqiu, Xiang Liu deliberately frightened Xiao Yao away with his ferocity, watching her retreat step by step into Tushan Jing's arms.
After discovering that she could breathe normally under the ocean, Xiao Yao swam freely and leisurely with Xiang Liu.
[End flashback] 

 H19279:

4 hours ago
 Kokuto:
XY did have feelings for Jing when XL accepted the Love Bug.
No, she didn't have any love/ affection feeling with YQS by the time XL accepted the love bug. XY thought of YQS to accompany her when she agreed with the 15 year promise

XY had the beginning of feelings for YSQ in QS town, even before XL accepted the transferred bug. There was a mix of attraction, pity, hope, desire for and fear of reliance, indescribable feelings, and threads of longing that could not be severed.

Those feelings were strengthened when YSQ tried to help XY escape from CX in chapter 8, after XL accepted the transferred bug. 

Those feelings were strengthened even further in chapter 22, after XY found out that YSQ couldn't bear to live without her. 

Their relationship changed again after XY spoke with Tian Er in chapter 32 (making her realize that a relationship could only be successful if both parties put effort into it) and reconnected with TSJ in chapter 33.

-----

Chapter 1:

So Xiao Liu stopped washing his body and instead prepared a tub so he could take proper baths.

...

Xiao Liu put the cloth next to him and said, “You wash yourself. Your hair isn’t fully grown back yet so don’t scrub so hard.”

Xiao Liu sat to the side and munched on a snack and kept him company.

Perhaps because each scar on his body was a type of shame, the man always kept his head raised and eyes closed so as to not look at his own body. He took the cloth and started washing himself. From the neck down to the chest down to the stomach and finally lower towards his legs.

Xiao Liu’s eyes followed his hand when suddenly he turned to the side and munched loudly on the duck neck, making crunch crunch sounds.

The man’s eyes opened and he looked towards Xiao Liu. The sunlight shone through the window and bathed Xiao Liu in light. His cheeks were red and it was illuminated by the sunlight like a piece of beautiful jade with red spots on it.

Xiao Liu waited until the man was done bathing and carried him out of the tub. Because his leg wasn’t fully healed, usually Xiao Liu helped dress him but today he just put him on the pallet and let go.

The man kept his eyes lowered, one hand on the pallet supporting his body and the other clasping his robe shut. His hands were thin but very long, the newly grown nails white and healthy.

Xiao Liu kept his head lowered and put the robe next to him. “You….you try dressing yourself. If you can’t do it then call me.”

Xiao Liu hurried out of the room but stood by the door listening to the sounds, and when it all sounded normal that’s when he left.

-----

Chapter 2:

Shi Qi had laughter in his eyes and Xiao Liu couldn’t stand the way he always seemed to float above everything so poured him a glass of wine. “Drink it!” Shi Qi took it and gulped it down.

Xiao Liu was startled. “It’s poisoned.”

The laughter in Shi Qi’s eyes never disappeared as his body collapsed softly. Xiao Liu anxiously gave him the antidote and yelled, “You idiot!” while his heart felt this indescribable feeling.

-----

Chapter 3:

He wasn’t angry that Shi Qi let Xuan take the antidote. He was angry because when he relied on someone it was to turn around and discover that person wasn’t there. He was angry at himself for having this pathetic hope. 

...

Xiao Liu hurried back to his room, the hard shell around his heart already sealed shut again. It was his moment of softened pity that caused him to be confused for a while but now he was back to thinking clear again. Every person arrived alone on this Earth and would depart alone. There was no one to rely on. How much hope and reliance one had today, was how much pain and suffering one would endure down the road. Rather than that happening, it was better to not have it to begin with.

-----

Chapter 8:

The carriage started to move and it was dark and Xiao Liu and Jing were tightly pressed together due to its cramped space. When Xiao Liu went to look for Jing, it was a spur of the moment thing. He wanted to see Jing put in a tight spot, he wanted to hear Jing try to talk him into going to see the Grand Emperor and it was no big deal. Xiao Liu wanted to hear all of this with his own ears, so that he could use this cruel method to cut the final threads of longing in his heart, so that he could leave without a care, so that he could let Wen Xiao Liu vanish forever without any sadness.

But when Xiao Liu said he didn’t want to go and Jing never asked why he would rather risk death to escape than go, nor did he pause to think about his own danger before agreeing to help him escape, the longing in Xiao Liu’s heart expanded instead of being severed.

...

Xiao Liu laughed. “I don’t want to see the Grand Emperor for a different reason. Shi Qi, don’t worry about me, I stake my life on it that the Grand Emperor won’t kill me!”

Shi Qi could tell Xiao Liu was being serious so relaxed. Xiao Liu couldn’t help but secretly smile, every person must feel happy to have another worried about their welfare.

Shi Qi quietly held Xiao Liu and Xiao Liu quietly listened to his heartbeat. In this place of death, separated from the world’s enticements and entanglements, it made the complicated relationship between a man and a woman so very simple. It was just him and her. Xiao Liu suddenly felt right being here and that was calming.

Xiao Liu said, “How about we never leave here.”

“Fine.”

...

“Just you. And me.”

Xiao Liu laughed knowing that Shi Qi also understood. There was so much that made life complicated purely due to circumstance. The old married couple living in the far off secluded mountains, they were actually the envy of so many who live glamorous lives of conflict.

...

He said, “The first time I bathed after I was strong enough, you sat to the side and I saw…..when you saw my body…..I knew you…..to me…..”

Xiao Liu yelped and then covered her face. “You’re lying! I didn’t, I didn’t!”

“I’m not lying.”

“You’re lying, it’s totally a lie. I never blush.”

...

Xiao Liu had long forgotten to be angry and slowly turned around and rested her head on Shi Qi’s shoulder to listen to him talk. Shi Qi’s forehead was resting on Xiao Liu’s hair. “I couldn’t open my eyes so I couldn’t see you. I could only sense. You didn’t want me to be afraid so you told me your name. You didn’t want me to be shamed so you told me jokes. You lightly wiped away my sweat and held me in your embrace and washed my hair which hadn’t been washed in three years. I knew how disgusting and horrific my body was, but you treated it like a treasure and tended to it with care. The three years of torture and degradation, the body even I couldn’t face and I couldn’t bear to walk out the door. That day you helped me bathe and when you saw my body you blushed beet red. In that instant I was truly reborn. In your eyes, I was still a man…..a man who affected you…”

Xiao Liu yelled, “Don’t you dare say another word!”

Shi Qi’s eyes misted with tears and it splashed on Xiao Liu’s hair, but his voice was filled with mirth. “When you carried me out of the tub, you didn’t even dare look directly at me before placing me on the pallet. You ran off even before you were done talking. How could I ever think you were a man?”

-----

Chapter 10:

“Everyone can appreciate a beautiful exterior, if I am the only one who can admire your beautiful interior then I’m happy.”

Xiao Liu felt her face redden and her heart beat faster. Shi Qi lately was the type who chose not to say much, but whenever he said something he had her feel totally off-kilter.

...

Xiao Liu lightly shook their hands and softly said, “Don’t worry and go. Fifteen years, I’ll wait for you.” Since that connection and longing couldn’t be severed, then let it remain for fifteen years. After that fifteen years, whether the thread would disappear or become a web, no one knows.

-----

Chapter 14:

Xiao Yao snuck a peek at Jing from under her veil. Jing sensed it and he lowered his eyes and smiled. Xiao Yao also smiled, even if she couldn’t talk to him or stand too close, but their hearts were aligned together and felt very close.

-----

Chapter 22:

Xiao Yao turned to look at Jing and murmured, “You really are so broken over me that you are seeking death?”

Xiao Yao felt the shell around her heart shatter completely. All those threads that she tried to cut all those times finally weaved together into a web at last.

-----

Chapter 27:

Xiao Yao was silent and softly said, “No, when I see him looking so devastated it actually makes me a little bit happy. If he was like me, smiling and unaffected, then I would feel worse.” Xiao Yao sighed “I know it’s all over and I want to forget him as soon as possible, and I can say we are just nothing to each other, but deep down inside I don’t want him to forget me. I act like I don’t care but I won’t allow him not to care. If he doesn’t care this soon then I’ll hate him forever……….” Xiao Yao shook her head. “Am I really sick to think this?”

Zhuan Xu listened and then said, “You’re not sick, you just loved him for real.” He smiled sadly “Xiao Yao, I really regret it now. If it wasn’t for me wanting so badly to get the support of Tu Shan Jing, then none of this would have happened.”

Xiao Yao walked up to him. “Did you forget? I saved him before you even showed up.”

“But you didn’t love him then. I’m the one who not only gave him the chance, I even created opportunities for him so that he could get closer to you step by step.”

It really was due to Zhuan Xu that she and Jing got to this point today – if it wasn’t for Zhuan Xu capturing her, she wouldn’t have asked Jing for help, she would have just switched her face and disappeared one day. If Zhuan Xu hadn’t locked them in the jail, Jing wouldn’t have asked for a fifteen year promise. If Zhuan Xu didn’t need Jing, she wouldn’t have gone back to see Jing that day because she had already severed the ties……

Xiao Yao pushed Zhuan Xu out and said with a smile, “What happened between Jing and I, you merely created the opportunity, but I don’t regret liking him so why do you need to feel bad? Don’t worry, time will heal everything and I just need more time to forget him.”

-----

Chapter 33:

Xiao Yao said, “Fang Feng Yi Yang was always polite and well-mannered in front of you, gentle and sweet, but I knew from the very beginning that she was calculating and deadly. I also knew you were soft-hearted and felt apologetic to her. Fang Feng Yi Yang was sure to use your personality and your regret against you. But I did nothing, I didn’t even warn you. I stood to the side and watched. My childhood made me pessimistic about human emotions. I felt like nothing will last forever and no one can be relied on. I never truly believed in you and I didn’t want to make the effort first. So when what I expected happened, I felt like it was exactly as I predicted. I knew people can’t be trusted. But I didn’t know that what we put in is what we get back. We need to make the effort to achieve the ending we want. Xan Tian Er said that if I never planted the seeds and tilled the field, how can I expect to reap the crop in the end?”

There were tears in Xiao Yao’s eyes. “Every night I thought about the fault and knew that I was wrong. My own pessimistic personality and attitude, my own distrust of others, it caused me to lose the man I like. If I made a bit more effort, said more or did more, perhaps the result would be completely different. Zhuan Xu thought I couldn’t get over it because I hated you, but in truth it’s because I can’t forgive myself. Jing, you shouldn’t feel guilty anymore. The world thinks we’re both very smart and calculating but when it came to our feelings and relationship, we both made mistakes. A person can make mistakes that can be fixed, other times it can never be fixed…….”