TamzinMillemni

A Mixed Bag

This series should rightly be acknowledged for tackling the subject of autism at a time when it was still pretty much a ‘hidden’ neurodivergence. Another plus is that the story is heartwarming, there is a decent character journey and the autistic ML is more than a two-dimensional portrayal.

However, that’s where the positives end. The patients’ stories are often tone deaf in their attempt to portray sentimentality. At times it seemed like they were doing their best approximation of ‘feel good’ stories that inevitably came across as clunky and clumsy. On their portrayal of autism, I can only speak as a non-autistic person and my perspective of this show is through the lens of a neurotypical person. So I am sure there are things that I cannot say subjectively whether they are portrayed well or not.

Still, I think it’s safe to say that the views of autism in this show both sociologically and medically were questionable to say the least. The science just wasn’t science-ing and even the ‘progressive’ views that were supposed to serve as the righteous ‘voice of the show’ made me cringe to know that there was a time that this was the ‘academic’ view of autism in Korea (I’m assuming the creators of this series researched Korean academia regarding autism, but I might be giving them too much credit).

What stuck out to me the most, was the notion that autism could be cured. The excessive use of the words ‘normal’, ‘stupid’, ‘crazy’, ‘mentally weak’ etc, coming from a show representing the medical profession was quite jarring. Surely, even ten years ago Korean doctors weren’t this inept in their understanding of autism, the behaviours associated with autism and whether it was something that could just go away. I expected this from the general public as they are less knowledgeable. If these misinformation were mainly being voiced by the characters that were not doctors, I could understand but the prejudice and pseudoscience was coming mostly from the ‘doctors’. I can just imagine well meaning Korean viewers, with very little knowledge of autism, watching this show in 2013 thinking they were actually learning something and gaining an understanding of autism.

Whether that was more damaging than the positives of having autism representation at the time of this release, is something I cannot say either way. But it’s a good question to ask. Of course, portrayals of people with autism have come leaps and bounds since this series was aired. Extraordinary Attorney Woo and Move To Heaven are two such examples.

Read More

Another Nostalgic Blast From The Past

When I say I have searched high and low for this movie for YEARS, I’m not exaggerating. I watched this in either 2013 or 2014 and I’m not good at remembering movie names so all I could remember were parts of the plot. This movie, after The Suspicious Housekeeper, set me on my k-drama journey. This drama has stuck in my mind because of the (explicit for it’s time) r*pe scene. It wasn’t implied like the scenes I’d seen in k-drama rom-coms up to that point, it was brutal. There’s also this one scene with the umbrella after the child versions had been kidnapped and that scene will stay forever in my memory. It’s what lead me to finally find this series again after all these years.

It is a product of its time. I remember the picture quality being smoother/crisper (which is to be expected), this makes it harder to watch and gain the full quality this many years later but the heart of the story is still very compelling.

Read More

Finally Found It Again After All These Years!

Watched this years ago and finally remembered the name of it only recently. I still remember how many emotions this series stirred up inside of me. I felt so deeply for this woman who lost her child, even though at the time I had never experienced that level of loss before. But I could identify with the loneliness and becoming a shell of a person.

I think this might have been the first drama themed k-drama I ever watched. Prior to this I had only viewed the teen and YA Korean rom-coms. I went to watch it again after finding it on MDL and I think the production value still holds up. The acting is really strong and the story is still impactful.

I remember the year I watched this was the year after my youngest sister was born and I was obsessed with saying, “Bok Nyeo-nim shiro” and “Krom”. My younger sister would follow me around the house saying, “NimNim”. She’s ten years old now and whenever I turn to her and say “Krom”, to excuse myself; she puts her hands together like a robot and says, “Krom” back to me like she’s saying, “permission granted”. I love it because it’s one of the things that we bonded over. This and using other tv/movie references in our daily lives.

Read More

You Need To See This

This is one of those dramas that will stay with me. It’s very emotionally heavy (lots of emotions bubbling underneath the surface) and it’s these volatile emotions that lead to quite graphic scenes of violence that may make viewers uncomfortable but I think it’s dramas like this one that needs to be viewed so that those emotions can sit with you. It’s important to feel these emotions vicariously (which you do - very much so) and recognise where they are coming from. They should resonate with you, as it’s a hard look at how people become this way.

This drama was very illustrative, with the three main leads representing how someone can end up so far down a certain path. Each character is at different stages of that path. Soo Ho could have easily used his skills to become a school bully and give in to baser instincts but he doesn’t. Even when he has issues with Boem Seok he makes sure not to cross the line. He is someone who knows when to stop. Shi Eun is someone who was headed down the wrong path and about to give in to all his (understandable) anger and pent up frustration. I could feel him holding back in the earlier episodes. The tension was so thick and heavy, at times it felt suffocating so I can only imagine how much Shi Eun was being stifled by it. You can drown in those kinds of emotions and life circumstances where you feel like the boot is constantly on your neck. All that anger and resentment just to be greeted with more of the same each day. No wonder people in these circumstances flip out and rain down hell in a violent outburst when it finally breaks them and the anger comes spilling out.

Thankfully, Shi Eun was brought back from the brink before he went too far. He had someone like Soo Ho to pull him away from the edge and most importantly, Shi Eun was receptive to his help/intervention. This is where Boem Seok differs. The writers, director and most importantly; the actor, did a great job of showing the similarities and parallels between Shi Eun and Boem Seok’s characters and then showed how unlike Shi Eun, Boem Seok allowed himself to go to the brink. Unlike Shi Eun, he did not heed the warnings to stop before he was too far gone. And while he was justified in his anger and needing remedy for his pain; he crossed the line and became a victim who victimises.

What’s even more resonant is seeing how Boem Seok’s actions also drags Shi Eun past the brink as he loses it at the end and gives in to his pent up anger, frustration and resentment. Watching him in the second half of the finale, I felt so exhausted and emotionally drained. He looked tired, empty and like he had just returned from war, a shell of a person. This is the outcome when people are pushed too far. This is how someone loses the light behind their eyes.

The actors portray the complex states of emotions expertly. If you want to see characters who are real shades of grey; this is a drama that is a great illustration of that in the most harrowing way. You will not be disappointed.

Read More

Highly Recommend To All

The really good parts of this series, I loved wholeheartedly. I found it funny and devastating and supernatural and uplifting. Even though most of the supporting characters show up for a short time, their performances are no less compelling and touching as the main characters’ performances. I really liked that the anthology style of each ‘case’ works on their own individually but also ties in together with the main story.

The reason why it’s an 8.5 and not a 9 for me is because from one minute to the next I was either extremely riveted or slightly bored (there was no in between). The riveting bits were really riveting and engaging. If I could suggest one thing to make it better, it would be for them to tighten up the narrative a bit.

There were also plot points that kinda went nowhere but these were small plot points. I don’t know if this was a translation issue or an issue with the series itself. For example, they drew attention to something the boss’ male employee said that was ‘off’ in that school girl with the clips case but they never expounded on that or did anything with it. So, that part felt unfinished and like they dropped that part of the story.

I can’t stress enough though, that this is a really good watch and I’d highly recommend it. It gets you in the feels in all the best and most devastating ways. Like everyone else, I’m praying for a series 2.

Read More

If You Accept That All The Characters Are Kinda Terrible It’s Mildly Entertaining

After watching this series, I wouldn’t rate it lower than a 5.5. I’d give it a 6 and that’s because the timeline is all over the place and the acting is a little below average. The NC scenes also weren’t giving. They just made me laugh out loud. As for the rest, as much as I have a bias against cheating being portrayed as something for people to just get over and as inevitable; I didn’t get to dwell on this because I was so preoccupied with trying to follow the storyline/timeline. Each episode was waaaay too long and overall was 8 episodes too many.

This series is somewhat what I wanted Only Friends to be. A bl that is filled with only terrible, debauched characters that you can watch with fascination without feeling sorry for ANY of them. Of course, Only Friends has miles better production value and writing but the problem arises when they try to paint these types of characters as people to root for. Just once, I want a series that embraces the shitty-ness of people and is self aware in that regard. I’ve always thought this would be a fascinating concept to watch unfold onscreen where every character is self-indulgent and only thinks of themselves and their wants. Where no characters are redeemed and there is no pretence of them being decent people.

The ‘messiness’ of the characters is what turns viewers off the most from this series but I found it entertaining in a morbid fascination kinda way. Like watching a couple fight on the street or like watching a wildlife documentary. lol

Read More

The Second Half Is Worth The Watch

This was one that surprised me. I didn’t expect to like it as much as I did. It was definitely a tale of two halves. It almost seemed like each half was created by two different directors as they were so contrasting in tone, style, depth and cinematography. I’ll be honest, if I had watched the first half only, this would have gone on my list of bls that I watched and never thought of again. But the second half packed a punch. It’s the better half. It’s tragically beautiful and I’m so surprised I came away feeling hopeful, despite the bitter and painful things unfolding on screen. There was so much beauty in the relationship between the lead and the mother of his dead partner. So much beauty in uncovering that the dead partner truly loved him. So much beauty in the bonds forged through pain. I recommend this movie whenever I can because I don’t think many people watch it long enough to get to the second half - which is where it shines.

Read More

Better Than Part One In Some Ways

In a lot of ways, this sequel is stronger than part 1, but there are also things that you can look past in part 1 that you cannot in this sequel. The highlight of the series for me was getting the insight into how Kiyoi feels about Hira by seeing things from his POV. I enjoyed seeing them in a relationship (something that we did not get to see in part 1).

Overall, I felt like progress was made in their relationship - transitioning slowly from the servant/master dynamic to a more rounded relationship with outwardly reciprocation of care and affection. The frustrations come from seeing how deeply rooted Hira is in his low value of himself and how that has caused him to become a ‘toxic observer’. He’s so content with just observing and serving that he doesn’t realise that by idolising Kiyoi and essentially not letting him past the barriers he’s put up for himself; that he’s hurting Kiyoi who is looking for something deeper and wants to be treated as a human and as his partner. What Hira is doing is a form of withholding and it can be just as hurtful and toxic as emotional abuse. I understand why he’s like this. It’s a form of self defence that he has developed throughout his life to protect himself but it’s no less frustrating to watch and no doubt painful and damaging to others because of how acutely unaware of it he is.

Read More

This BL Does Well For What It Is - It’s Become An All Time Fave

What starts off as purely a servant/master dynamic, slowly develops into a genuine deep care for each other. When Hira looks into Kiyoi’s eyes you get a sense of why he’s able to fall so deep. The actor who plays Kiyoi has the most expressive eyes that swallow you up. And like the ying to his yang, Hira’s eyes are so piercing you feel like he really sees you when he looks at you. Its the feeling of having all his focus, love and admiration. That’s a powerful feeling. So much is conveyed in a single look so you can also understand why Kiyoi becomes attracted to Hira and falls for his piercing gaze, because Hira is someone who really sees him and is someone who appreciates him for the first time in his life without wanting anything back. You really buy into these two characters from different worlds. That they are able to fall in love with each other. It’s believable that they each get from one another, something that was missing before. It’s not perfect but I think it does a good job of balancing flawed characters who have toxic coping mechanisms and it does so with sincerity and honest emotions. Having good chemistry goes a long way to making these characters feel real and grounded. Their chemistry is one of the best I’ve seen in bl land. They have the perfect amount of tension that keeps you hooked until they finally get together. They’re two people who shouldn’t work on paper but they manage to carve out a space where they both fit together for each other.

In reality, I’d rate this an 8.6 but MDL doesn’t give that option.

Read More