Wanttowritesobad

Exactly. I defend both of them, and I don't understand the Little Jane hate either. To me, his reactions are very realistic. He's scared, confused, conflicted, but still in love. None of that makes him stupid, it makes him HUMAN. They can defend P'Jane but why blame Little Jane's very valid reactions?

I actually noticed the irony too as a viewer. The man whose first rule is "Don't Be Too Emotional" ends up being the one acting that emotionally. But I'm not sure whether that's something P'Jane himself consciously realizes in that moment, or whether it's just a thematic irony for us as viewers. Your interpretation could absolutely be right. Personally, I lean more toward the latter because the series explicitly brings the promise back into focus, so that's what I naturally connect P'Jane's decision to stop to. But I do like the irony you pointed out.

You described Little Jane's bodily reactions (ceasing resistance, going limp, avoiding eye contact, etc.), to me, that all comes down to one thing: Little Jane had completely given up. That's basically what I said in my previous comment. So I think we're talking about the same turning point, just using different language.

Where I still differ is what happens next. To me, P'Jane realizing Little Jane has completely shut down is precisely what makes him confront the promise he made. That's why I don't see the realization and the promise as two separate things. They're connected.

I also understand what you meant by "weaponizing the promise against himself" now. If I understood you correctly, you're saying he uses his own promise to restraint himself, even though it goes against what he wants in that moment. That actually makes sense to me, since that's essentially what I meant from the beginning when I said he stops because he remembers his promise.

Where I still disagree a bit is when you say P'Jane believes everything he does is right. If that were the case, I don't think he would apologize later when Little Jane tells him loving someone doesn't give him the right to treat them that way. Nor do I think he'd promise that it would never happen again. To me, that suggests he IS capable of recognizing that he crossed a line, even if that realization only comes after his emotions settle.

So I don't see him as someone who lacks any awareness or remorse. I see him as someone whose jealousy and possessiveness overwhelm his judgement in the moment, but who later has enough self-awareness to realize he went too far. That doesn't excuse what he did, but I think it's an important distinction in understanding his psychology.

I think we're talking about two different moments now.

My original point was simply "What Makes P'Jane Stops". Your first reply was that he stops because he realizes Little Jane's fear and emotional distress. My point has always been that Little Jane had already been scared and distressed for a while, yet P'Jane continued.

To me, the turning point is when P'Jane realizes Little Jane has completely given up. That's when he confronts the boundary he promised not to cross, which is why I think the promise is an important part of why he physically stops.

Little Jane saying, "Continue!" is incredibly important too, but I see it differently. To me, it doesn't make P'Jane stops because he had already stopped by then. What the "Continue!" does is make P'Jane realize even more deeply the psychological damage he's just caused, which is why his expression changes so noticeably afterward.

One thing though: what do you mean by "weaponize the promise against himself"? Could you explain that part a bit more? I honestly do not understand what you're trying to say here.

We interpret the scene differently. To me, P'Jane did lose control emotionally. His jealousy and possessiveness are exactly what led him to assault Little Jane in the first place. That doesn't mean he wasn't aware of what he was doing, but I don't see those two things as being mutually exclusive.

I also don't think the promise was just something P'Jane mentioned after he had already made his decision. P'Jane stops before Little Jane says, "Continue!" After stopping, he tells Little Jane, "I told you to leave. Before I can't keep my promise." To me, Little Jane's "Continue!" doesn't make P'Jane stop, because he had already done that. What that line does is make P'Jane realize even more deeply how much he has hurt Little Jane. But the reason he tells Little Jane to leave is because he's afraid he won't be able to keep the promise he made.

I also think the series deliberately emphasizes that promise. Later, Little Jane explicitly asks if the promise P'Jane mentioned that night was the one about not forcing him if he wasn't ready. P'Jane apologizes and promises that it will never happen again. That's why I don't see the promise as just an afterthought, it feels like an important part of the scene and of P'Jane's character.

So, I agree that seeing Little Jane completely shut down is the moment that breaks through P'Jane's anger and makes him realize the seriousness of what is happening. But to me, that realization is connected to the promise he made. Seeing Little Jane in that state is what makes him confront the fact that he is about to cross the exact boundary he promised not to cross. I don't see these as two separate things, the emotional realization and the promise are connected.

That's part of it, but I don't think that's the whole reason. Simply because Little Jane was already showing fear and emotional distress from the beginning of the scene. The crucial element is that P'Jane remembered the promise he made to Little Jane. So it's not just that he realized Little Jane was scared, it's that he reached a point where he remembered the boundary he promised not to cross.

I actually find the blood contracts more interesting "because" they're not supernatural. To me, they're symbolic. They reflect how seriously P'Jane takes promises. In Episode 5 for example: he doesn't stop because of magic or because the contract forces him to, he stops because "he remembers his own promise" to Little Jane. I think that says a lot about his psychology.

As for why people fear him, I'd say it's a mix of his reputation, his influence, and the fact that he always expects people to face the consequences of the deals they willingly make with him.

I'd say "Don't Be Too Emotional" is similar to "To My Shore" more in a psychological sense than anything else. That said, I think Fan Xiao is much more unhinged than P'Jane. At the beginning, Fan Xiao genuinely wanted to break Shulang, which is not the case with P'Jane, even though he's obviously possessive and psychologically complex.

As for the blood contracts, I don't think they're just to be edgy. To me, they're symbolic. They reflect how seriously P'Jane views promises and contracts.

I feel like a lot of discussions around this series end up reducing one of the leads to a label.

Some people say P'Jane is a "narcissist with a GOD complex", others say Little Jane is either "naive", "stupid" or "inconsistent".

To me, neither reading really captures what's happening.

First: Little Jane isn't constantly changing his mind. His behavior follows the same emotional pattern throughout the story: he loves P'Jane, he wants to trust him, but he's terrified of being hurt by him or by the world he (P'Jane) belongs to. Once you understand that internal conflict, his actions become much more consistent.

Second: P'Jane isn't simply "evil" either. He's deeply possessive and obsessive, and when he feels like he's losing Little Jane, that's when he becomes dangerous. But the series has also shown that there are moments where seeing Little Jane's pain brings him back to reality. That doesn't excuse his actions, but it tells us something important about how he's written.

For me, the interesting part isn't deciding who's the villain or who's the idiot. It's understanding the psychology behind both characters and seeing whether they can confront their issues, grow, and eventually build a healthier relationship together. That's what keeps me watching.

Sometimes it feels like people watch fiction as if it were a morality exam. Most of us already KNOW abuse is wrong. If toxic relationship dynamics are something you don't want to see depicted at all, then maybe toxic fiction just isn't for you. What's interesting is not being reminded every five minutes that abuse is bad, we already know that. What's interesting is seeing how the story explores obsession, possessiveness, drama, and whether these characters actually grow from their issues.

I haven't read the novel and don't really plan to, so I'm judging the series on its own. To me, that scene didn't come out of nowhere. P'Jane's possessiveness has been building up for several scenes. We already saw how he reacted when he thought Little Jane was choosing P'Dan over him (staircase scene, episode 4). Episode 5 is that same possessiveness pushed to an extreme after believing Little Jane was about to "belong" to someone else. That doesn't make what he did okay, but I don't think it came out of nowhere. It was consistent with the pattern the series had already established.

I get what you're saying, and I agree that some of P'Jane's behavior deserves to be questioned too. But I'm approaching things differently. I'm judging series Little Jane as his own character, not against his novel version. So when it comes to him being "too immature", I think that's still an interpretation, not an objective fact. That's why, if I were P'Jane's friend, I'd be more interested in understanding why HE fell for Little Jane than telling him he has bad taste.

I don't think cognitive dissonance is exactly what's happening with Little Jane.

You explained it. Basically, Cognitive Dissonance is when someone experiences discomfort because their beliefs and their actions don't match, and they try to reduce that discomfort by changing the way they think about the situation.

For example:

Someone believes: "Honesty is very important to me." But then they cheat on an exam.

Now there is a conflict: "Cheating is wrong." but "I cheated."

To reduce that discomfort, they might tell themselves: "Everyone cheats" or "The exam was unfair anyway" or "It was only this one time"

They are changing the way they think so their behavior feels less wrong.

Another example: Someone believes: "Smoking is unhealthy." But then they smoke everyday.

To reduce the discomfort, they might think: "My grandfather smoked until he was 90" or "Life is too short anyway" or "It helps me deal with stress".

Again, they are trying to make the contradiction between their belief and their action easier to accept by changing how they think.

Now, I don't think that's what Little Jane is doing.

Little Jane is not thinking: "I know P'Jane is bad, but I love him, so I'll convince myself he's not."

If it was cognitive dissonance, we would see him changing his beliefs to justify P'Jane's actions.

For example:

Little Jane says he hates being manipulated. If he found out P'Jane manipulated him, a cognitive dissonance response would be: "It's okay, he only did it because he loves me" or "It wasn't really manipulation because he had a reason".

Or, Little Jane says he doesn't trust people easily. If he discovered P'Jane hid important information, a cognitive dissonance response would be: "It doesn't matter. P'Jane is different, so it's okay when he hides things from me".

But that's not what happened.

Little Jane didn't just excuse everything P'Jane did. He questioned him, became scared, investigated, and eventually even broke up with him.

So Little Jane's reaction is more like: "I love P'Jane, but some things I discover about him scare me. I want to trust him, but I also want to protect myself."

That's not him changing his beliefs to make the relationship easier to accept. That's someone struggling between two strong feelings at the same time.

To me, Little Jane's conflict is less about cognitive dissonance and more about emotional conflict or ambivalence. He loves P'Jane. He wants to trust P'Jane. But he's afraid of being hurt. Those feelings can exist together, and that's what drives his actions.

My bad, then :D I've been reading so many serious comments about this series that I automatically assumed you were being serious too.

Oh, I get the role-play thing now, okay. 😄 But if I were P'Jane's friend, I'd probably try to understand why HE fell for Little Jane instead of telling him he has bad taste. I'd be more interested in understanding his feelings than judging his choice. But to each their own, I guess. :D

I understand why some viewers might feel this way, especially with the limited time the series has to develop everything. But I don't think Little Jane's feelings are just a bout lust. P'Jane was someone who helped Little Jane trust himself more and become a person he liked being. Little Jane even said, "I love the person I am when I'm with you." So I think that kind of feeling wouldn't just disappear overnight. Also, I think some scenes need to be looked at with context: Little Jane being hurt and conflicted doesn't mean he was always uncomfortable with P'Jane touching him. The issue is what's happening between them at that moment, not a lack of attraction.

Honestly, both Tee and Heng are gorgeous. I understand why people love Big Jane, but I don't get why defending him has to come to Little Jane's expense. You can appreciate Big Jane as a complex character and still have empathy for Little Jane. It doesn't have to be one or the other. Personally, I defend both.

"Being straight" is actually a perfectly valid explanation. But even if GAP were not straight, that still wouldn't mean he'd automatically be attracted to Little Jane. Being attracted to men doesn't mean you're attracted to ALL men. And also, just because a lot of people are attracted to Little Jane doesn't mean EVERYONE is going to be attracted to him.

So... people are allowed to prefer the characters and how they're written in the novel, but if they prefer the characters in the series, then their taste is bad? Hum, that's an interesting standard...🤔

I've noticed that too. People often focus on Little Jane's reactions without giving the same attention to the situations that lead him to react that way.