I once had a co-worker with a younger brother who is autistic. He knows that I am autistic too because for I disclosed it to the team (one of the rare occasions I chose to disclose it in a work environment).
One day, he asked me about autism because he's trying to understand his brother. Despite our lengthy discussion, he still ended up telling me that "autism is not real", that it is just a product of the person's imagination, that it is fake, an excuse.
No amount of discussion, examples, first-hand experiences I shared, and he himself admitted his brother also experienced some of what I've experienced, his mind is dead set that "autism is not real".
I was deeply offended. But still I tried, in the end I told him: saying "autism is not real" is denying the existence of your brother and that I too doesn't exist, and yet you grew up with your brother, you love him, and you are talking to me. Just think about it. It is who we are. It is our identity.
I rarely disconnect with anyone with no logical reason and this was one of it. I think it was a month later that I unfriended him from all SNS. I didn't want to but I was deeply hurt, forget about myself but his brother, his own brother, he's denying who he is.
It's this misconceptions and stereotype from the media (plenty of it that are wrong), discrimination, and prejudices that shapes the mind of people even within the family. His own brother, imagine that. The best support an autistic can receive is not from "special needs school" but right from home.
Yet that is not what's happening in many homes; just like how in episode 3, the parent's initially preferred to save their reputation and their eldest son's reputation and use their autistic son as the fall guy; than to outright fight for him. And this is happening a lot to this day, if something bad happens, it's either investigators concoct some story the suspect is autistic, or if the suspect is officially diagnosed as autistic they'll use his autism. It happens even in other scenarios.
Feedback on episode 3 from an autistic (probably part 1).
I've been taking down notes but in the end it has become too emotional for me.
This episode captured majority of the sentiments, complaints, and experiences of every autistic--from most "severe" to less "severe" (to borrow the show's wording).
The f**** discrimination and prejudice society have about autism spectrum, the #1 of it all: all autistics are the same. If one is unfit, all of them are. If one is violent, all of them are.
This is the reason why there are autistics who does not want to be labeled with it. Many doesn't even want to get a diagnosis. They chose to live on their own, denying who they are, just so they do not get discriminated upon or be looked down on.
This is why we hide ourselves. This is why we blend in. This is why wear masks. I learned it at young age and have carried it through adulthood. It was only a few years back that I finally was able to let my masks go and just be who I am.
I can not speak for the other autistics but masking is damn energy consuming. You have to constantly keep track of what a particular identity is. How you should act. And so on. It is even more frustrating because the masks we wear is not who we are and we feel guilty because we are lying to people. We hate lying and masking is one lie we are forced to do.
BUT we have to do it most of the time if we want to survive, or have some semblance of a … here's the stupid word again … "normal" life. (This is why I hate the word "normal" especially when it comes to this topic.)
I'll see if I can make a feedback on episode 3 itself at a later time. But right now, it's too emotional and very close to me. It deeply hurts.
Also, I’m curious if how often is it that Korean parents give repitive names?? Woo Young Woo. Genuinely curious…
Most often, it's not exactly repetitive. It just sounds like that because of the letters/words used but the meaning is different.
For example, the Woo (우) in Woo Young Woo (우영우) more likely have a different meaning if used as a surname (우) compared to used as the second syllable in a given name (like 영우).
To get an accurate meaning for some names like 우영우, we need to know the Hanja (Chinese) equivalent of it according to the writer. From there we can learn the possible meaning of the surname (우) and the given name (영우).
If I am not mistaken, there are also slight differences in pronunciation even if the same "letter" was used, although generally pronounced similarly when they find it "cool". (I remember encountering a similar "repetitive" name but the pronunciation is different for the character that was repeated.)
In any case, Korean culture and language experts can shed more light (and corrections if any).
If Dahyun wasn't a witness then it's one of these:a. She was involved in her death (possibly accidental/unintentional);b.…
Ahh, I see it now. It fits why in the preview he said Da Hyun wasn't a witness … because she was probably involved in some way (or unintentionally got involved).
Which explains why her mother doesn't see her and Gye Hoon should be together because there is a very dark past behind her.
If Dahyun wasn't a witness then it's one of these:a. She was involved in her death (possibly accidental/unintentional);b.…
Good point, it's possible he lured her too.
Although there was a scene wherein they ran away and Da Hyun kept on looking back, unsure of something (likely unsure if it was okay to leave Gye Young behind).
Maybe Jin Geun did not lure her, instead they agreed to play together at that house. Only to discover something very bad happened, so they ran away together.
Years later, Jin Geun is pestering her about it because she saw what was in The Red Gate.
Only at episode 3 … it really sucks when you know your best friend is hitting on your lover but you still want to trust them (as in your best friend and your lover).
Let’s hope it’s not like in Beyond Evil, where ML actor also starred. SML’s sister there was hit by a car…
Yep. It would be a total … I don't know how I would take it. I mean, there's romance, family, and some cool and mysterious "Link" … only to make a sudden dark turn.
I don't even understand why I'm rooting for Gye Young. I mean, in other shows I would have brushed the character as a literary device … but in this show, I don't want to give up on her.
I guess the kid actor did great in portraying an innocent and loving sister who looks up to her brother with 'special powers' … that probably got into me. So, I hope she's alive somewhere.
I think Mr. Walking Encyclopedia Attorney is the big crime boss. A genius and a psychopath are the same, one chose the light while the other chose the dark. So, a psychopath knows how to hide and blend. It is not about satisfying their urge, it is about playing a game.
The MO of the psychopath is to burn the body then wrap it like a mummy. Maybe even dump it in some significant place. For example, the latest victim revealed in episode 4 definitely was a rich woman who looks down on others and would never go beneath. The sewers is a perfect place to dump her body. (Dang, I sound like a psychopath. Hahahaha)
Don't check the cast, the adult Gye Young is not important in the story so of course there won't be an adult Gye Young in the cast until the actor appears … as a guest (which was done a lot of times in the past).
#3 is an interesting point! How will the woman who has used intimidation respond to the new woman who unwittingly…
Oooh, that's a good point! I haven't seen that dynamic.
If the current situation and continues, and worsens, the dynamics would turn into "new generation" vs "old generation"; children vs parents (or at least mothers).
You know, in a way Mrs. Lee and her real father also have that children vs. parent dynamic. She still hates she was abandoned and it'll surely play a factor when the adoptions are finally out in the open. Her father is already starting to suspect too because he feels at ease with her.
3. I think we're going to get some confrontations between Mom and HaeJun before they come to an understanding.…
Oh yes, the love triangle. Good question, how far indeed, since Soo Jae and Yoo Na will be together anyway. It will be definitely messy especially if they pushed it to a point they enter into a relationship and Yoo Na breaks up, or Soo Jae comes between them, just when Mrs. Hyun is opening up with her father.
Mrs. Hyun vs. Mrs. Lee hahhaha, and Yoo Na, YOO NA, is in the middle of it again. Poor girl, she already have a hard life and her relationship with her mom isn't that great, and then she's in for another--and bigger--issue.
#3 is an interesting point! How will the woman who has used intimidation respond to the new woman who unwittingly…
That's a good point, maybe she will be the one to break through the over protection Mrs. Lee put around herself and her family. Hae Jun is analytical, logical, and frank; she'll probably find a way to reach out to the mother who was hurt hiding deep inside Mrs. Lee--probably even crying despite the her showing "fine".
After all, a mother will always be a mother. A wife will always be a wife. Caring, loving, and if hurt by the people they cared for years, they may show they are strong but deep inside their heart is bleeding.
I've seen that dance he did before, but I can't remember where and which.Since Arin is part of the cast, probably…
I think so, it's familiar. Also, considering how he inserted funny moments for his character in the other episodes, he probably did the same with that dance, a funny Easter Egg.
1. The new OSTs were perfect to the new twists we are headed.
2. The previews are better. They picked the scenes which will intrigue us most without revealing too much.
3. They built up Mrs. Lee in a way that we have forgotten how scared she is of Attorney Shim Hae Jun. Thus when they finally met again, the Mrs. Lee that was so scary--even her husband and father-in-law kept things from her--suddenly was afraid of someone. It gave the effect that "so Mrs. Lee is afraid of someone too" even though we already knew about it.
4. The break up of the youngest couple is perfect in contrast to the the two other couples who are moving good so far.
5. Finally, the plot we are waiting for, the adoption! It's finally going to start and how happy I am that it will start in episode 29 out of 50. This is starting to look that it will also affect the relationship of the 2nd couple (and possibly even the 1st couple). Mrs. Lee and Mrs. Hyun may even clash, they're both strong women.
1 
One day, he asked me about autism because he's trying to understand his brother. Despite our lengthy discussion, he still ended up telling me that "autism is not real", that it is just a product of the person's imagination, that it is fake, an excuse.
No amount of discussion, examples, first-hand experiences I shared, and he himself admitted his brother also experienced some of what I've experienced, his mind is dead set that "autism is not real".
I was deeply offended. But still I tried, in the end I told him: saying "autism is not real" is denying the existence of your brother and that I too doesn't exist, and yet you grew up with your brother, you love him, and you are talking to me. Just think about it. It is who we are. It is our identity.
I rarely disconnect with anyone with no logical reason and this was one of it. I think it was a month later that I unfriended him from all SNS. I didn't want to but I was deeply hurt, forget about myself but his brother, his own brother, he's denying who he is.
It's this misconceptions and stereotype from the media (plenty of it that are wrong), discrimination, and prejudices that shapes the mind of people even within the family. His own brother, imagine that. The best support an autistic can receive is not from "special needs school" but right from home.
Yet that is not what's happening in many homes; just like how in episode 3, the parent's initially preferred to save their reputation and their eldest son's reputation and use their autistic son as the fall guy; than to outright fight for him. And this is happening a lot to this day, if something bad happens, it's either investigators concoct some story the suspect is autistic, or if the suspect is officially diagnosed as autistic they'll use his autism. It happens even in other scenarios.
I've been taking down notes but in the end it has become too emotional for me.
This episode captured majority of the sentiments, complaints, and experiences of every autistic--from most "severe" to less "severe" (to borrow the show's wording).
The f**** discrimination and prejudice society have about autism spectrum, the #1 of it all: all autistics are the same. If one is unfit, all of them are. If one is violent, all of them are.
This is the reason why there are autistics who does not want to be labeled with it. Many doesn't even want to get a diagnosis. They chose to live on their own, denying who they are, just so they do not get discriminated upon or be looked down on.
This is why we hide ourselves. This is why we blend in. This is why wear masks. I learned it at young age and have carried it through adulthood. It was only a few years back that I finally was able to let my masks go and just be who I am.
I can not speak for the other autistics but masking is damn energy consuming. You have to constantly keep track of what a particular identity is. How you should act. And so on. It is even more frustrating because the masks we wear is not who we are and we feel guilty because we are lying to people. We hate lying and masking is one lie we are forced to do.
BUT we have to do it most of the time if we want to survive, or have some semblance of a … here's the stupid word again … "normal" life. (This is why I hate the word "normal" especially when it comes to this topic.)
I'll see if I can make a feedback on episode 3 itself at a later time. But right now, it's too emotional and very close to me. It deeply hurts.
For example, the Woo (우) in Woo Young Woo (우영우) more likely have a different meaning if used as a surname (우) compared to used as the second syllable in a given name (like 영우).
To get an accurate meaning for some names like 우영우, we need to know the Hanja (Chinese) equivalent of it according to the writer. From there we can learn the possible meaning of the surname (우) and the given name (영우).
If I am not mistaken, there are also slight differences in pronunciation even if the same "letter" was used, although generally pronounced similarly when they find it "cool". (I remember encountering a similar "repetitive" name but the pronunciation is different for the character that was repeated.)
In any case, Korean culture and language experts can shed more light (and corrections if any).
Which explains why her mother doesn't see her and Gye Hoon should be together because there is a very dark past behind her.
Although there was a scene wherein they ran away and Da Hyun kept on looking back, unsure of something (likely unsure if it was okay to leave Gye Young behind).
Maybe Jin Geun did not lure her, instead they agreed to play together at that house. Only to discover something very bad happened, so they ran away together.
Years later, Jin Geun is pestering her about it because she saw what was in The Red Gate.
I don't even understand why I'm rooting for Gye Young. I mean, in other shows I would have brushed the character as a literary device … but in this show, I don't want to give up on her.
I guess the kid actor did great in portraying an innocent and loving sister who looks up to her brother with 'special powers' … that probably got into me. So, I hope she's alive somewhere.
The MO of the psychopath is to burn the body then wrap it like a mummy. Maybe even dump it in some significant place. For example, the latest victim revealed in episode 4 definitely was a rich woman who looks down on others and would never go beneath. The sewers is a perfect place to dump her body. (Dang, I sound like a psychopath. Hahahaha)
Don't check the cast, the adult Gye Young is not important in the story so of course there won't be an adult Gye Young in the cast until the actor appears … as a guest (which was done a lot of times in the past).
I'm not giving up on her. Hahahahah.
a. She was involved in her death (possibly accidental/unintentional);
b. She was already dead;
c. They were going to call for help but something happened
If the current situation and continues, and worsens, the dynamics would turn into "new generation" vs "old generation"; children vs parents (or at least mothers).
You know, in a way Mrs. Lee and her real father also have that children vs. parent dynamic. She still hates she was abandoned and it'll surely play a factor when the adoptions are finally out in the open. Her father is already starting to suspect too because he feels at ease with her.
It would be two eldest sons vs mom. (I hope she doesn't get hurt further if that happens, instead it becomes a way for her to ease and be more open.)
Mrs. Hyun vs. Mrs. Lee hahhaha, and Yoo Na, YOO NA, is in the middle of it again. Poor girl, she already have a hard life and her relationship with her mom isn't that great, and then she's in for another--and bigger--issue.
After all, a mother will always be a mother. A wife will always be a wife. Caring, loving, and if hurt by the people they cared for years, they may show they are strong but deep inside their heart is bleeding.
LOLs.
1. The new OSTs were perfect to the new twists we are headed.
2. The previews are better. They picked the scenes which will intrigue us most without revealing too much.
3. They built up Mrs. Lee in a way that we have forgotten how scared she is of Attorney Shim Hae Jun. Thus when they finally met again, the Mrs. Lee that was so scary--even her husband and father-in-law kept things from her--suddenly was afraid of someone. It gave the effect that "so Mrs. Lee is afraid of someone too" even though we already knew about it.
4. The break up of the youngest couple is perfect in contrast to the the two other couples who are moving good so far.
5. Finally, the plot we are waiting for, the adoption! It's finally going to start and how happy I am that it will start in episode 29 out of 50. This is starting to look that it will also affect the relationship of the 2nd couple (and possibly even the 1st couple). Mrs. Lee and Mrs. Hyun may even clash, they're both strong women.