basicbigirly

Jesus why are you all so miserable

oh my god thank youuu sometimes I feel like the only one who loved trintanwa/mileapo more ! I don’t dislike lertran, but their love story didn’t hit that hard for me (except for their ending, that hurt !)

Once again, I have to say I agree with you. The last scene was beautiful to me, but like I’ve said before, it would’ve been even better if Trin had managed to go back to Tanwa in Thailand (like he planned to) before Tanwa surprised him in Paris. We have seen them still loving each other fifty years later, so we can assume he apologized and made things right, but since the audience doesn’t see it, I can understand why one would doubt him.

Have a great week too <3

Just to clarify, I didn’t want them to heal with each other either ! After episode seven, I always thought they needed time apart to heal and grow and I’m glad it actually happened. When I said it would’ve been great if they could’ve helped each other through it, I meant it as the best case scenario in an ideal world, but it would have been unrealistic. I genuinely don’t see how they could’ve have been helpful to one another at the moment (at least not on the long term).

I also completely understand your issue with Trin’s choice of word. It bothered me too actually. But then I thought it through and this line is what first made me think that Trin was projecting: when Claire died, he also lost his friends and dealt with the grief, trauma and guilt alone, it was only HIM; after Tanwa stopped Trin from making it to the protest on time and Victor died, HE will also deal with the trauma and guilt on his own. Simply put, Trin doesn’t know how one can handle such situations outside of his own experience.

Other than that, I think this line also shows how, even before he actually left, Trin was already distancing himself from his past to cope with the trauma. You said him using « he » alone felt like Trin drawing a line between him and Tanwa, and I couldn’t agree more. That’s already him trying to leave everything that makes him suffer behind, and what happened between him and Tanwa is, at this point, one of the things that hurts the most — precisely because he loves him, I think. Trin distances himself from everyone and from his own feelings by going to Paris, because he’s in so much pain.

It’s unfair to Tanwa though, and that’s why I did get upset at first, when he said that. But I still can’t blame him, just like I was never able to blame Tanwa when he was hurting Trin by making him think he wasn’t serious about him because of his commitment issues due to his own unresolved trauma (of course the contexts, actions and reasons for said actions are all very different, this is just how I felt watching the show and after thinking it through).

I love both of these characters so much, and I could literally talk about them for hours. Thank you for hearing me out ! ❤️

I completely understand ! It seemed clear to me that Tanwa was still in the back of his mind (which is shown to us by the flashbacks during his monologue), and that he basically isolated himself from everyone (we always see him alone in Paris, and it looks like the letter from his student is one of the very few, if not the only contact he had with his loved ones in Thailand), which would be a trauma response, and could explain why he didn’t ask anyone about Tanwa: I agree that he probably wouldn’t have contacted Tanwa if Moira didn’t send him the book, not because he didn’t care, but because he tried to leave everything behind, including his love for Tanwa, and isolated himself in Paris to cope with his trauma.

But I do wish we saw more of all of that, so I get why you might find it underwhelming.

You said it feels like he did stop caring for those those years, and I have to say I disagree, but I get it too. To me, it feels like he pushed back his feelings because he couldn’t see himself with Tanwa ever again, since he still associated him with Victor’s death — hence his reaction after reading Tanwa’s book and finding out the truth (he probably felt guilty, too, I assume they had a conversation about it after meeting again). He didn’t just start caring again, his repressed feelings resurfaced, we can see it in his reaction, obviously, but also his micro expressions after seeing Tanwa again. I think if he genuinely stopped caring, he might not have wanted to see him for anything more than closure, and they definitely wouldn’t have been together for fifty years after that.

And like I said, I think him failing to be there for Tanwa is understandable. Disappointing, maybe, but understandable when you keep in mind the meltdown he had, the fact that he’s reliving his trauma, and that he’s grieving. He was still miserable in episode eight, even if it wasn’t as obvious as Tanwa. It would have been great if they had helped each other heal from what happened, but something was broken between them at the moment and the only way to fix it was Trin finding out the truth. Which was impossible since Tanwa turned to drugs and Trin wasn’t ready to see him (and I insist, I don’t blame any of them). Trin’s reaction especially is, unfortunately, painfully human and realistic.

However, I do agree that we should’ve seen him fight for Tanwa more. Like I said, I loved how he immediately tried to get in contact with Tanwa and straight up gave up on his life in Paris to see him, I loved the scene were they meet again, especially because they got to see the vanilla sky together. But maybe it would’ve been better if Tanwa didn’t show up in Paris before Trin could come back, if the ending was something like the locations of their last two scenes being switched: Trin comes back to Thailand, chases Tanwa, meets him again on the beach; and years later, they go see the vanilla sky together.

I appreciate you discussing this with me though ! I hope I don’t sound aggressive or anything.

Thank you !! Maybe it’s because in the last episode Trin looks way more composed than Tanwa, but some people seem to forget that he’s also going through a lot. It was made clear to us multiple times that he is heavily traumatised, he’s reliving that trauma (like you said) and he’s grieving; just because he’s not walking around screaming and crying doesn’t mean he’s okay after just one night.

It also makes sense that he couldn’t be around Tanwa before leaving, no matter how much he loves him: in his mind, he lost someone precious to him because he couldn’t go to him on time, and he couldn’t because Tanwa kept him with him (and Trin has no idea, at this point, that Tanwa tried to warn Victor; he doesn’t know that Tanwa was asked to hide the truth from him by Victor himself either.)

Tanwa might have needed to see him, but they also both needed time apart to heal and grow. Which worked just fine, on the long term.

I think the reason Trin could reconcile with Krailert and not with Tanwa before leaving is because Tanwa’s actions hurt him more than Krailert’s. Because he didn’t trust or open is heart to Krailert like he did with Tanwa.

However, I get your point, and this is not me saying that what he did wasn’t wrong. I love Trin, I think he’s my favorite character, but he is flawed (like every character in the show) and he shouldn’t have punched Tanwa or left him like that — although I don’t completely blame him: when he punched him, he was overcome with unbearable grief and reliving his trauma, he wasn’t able to think rationally, and him leaving Tanwa is also understandable since he most likely did not have the time to process everything that had happened and wasn’t ready to see him. Even if he’s calmer, he can’t be around the person who, in his mind, stopped him from saving Victor. It makes sense, no matter how much he loved him.

I also feel like (and this is just my interpretation) Trin was projecting: it’s like he took Claire’s place, except for the fact that he wasn’t the one dying, and Tanwa took his.

And since he dealt with the guilt alone after Claire’s death, Tanwa will too. Not because Trin wants him to, but because he can’t picture another way to deal with such feelings. But he did tell Sucha to take care of Tanwa; this is why I say he didn’t WANT Tanwa to suffer alone, he left knowing that someone was there for him, even if he couldn’t be that person.

I hope it makes sense lol (also I feel like I should’ve said that beforehand, but I apologise for any mistakes, english isn’t my first language)

This is why I love the scene where, after reading Tanwa’s book, Trin immediately tries to talk to Tanwa and even decides to go back to Thailand to see him, when no one answers the phone, without thinking twice. This scene shows us how much he still cares, how he never stopped caring. This isn’t like Trin to be so impulsive, but even after all this time, Tanwa still makes Trin act out of character.