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Replying to eightocci Jul 17, 2024
Title The Boyfriend Spoiler
Where to watch with English subtitles episode 3 on? Suddenly says subbed but is not
kisskh
On The Boyfriend Jul 16, 2024
Shun craves connection yet has a crippling fear of vulnerability.
he associates love and attachment with pain. once you love someone you also give them the power to hurt you, hoping they won't use it. that's why shutting down and isolating, acting cold and detached, seeking and focusing on the adverse sides of people - all that is just a desperate way to shield oneself from suffering (triggers) that stems from being attracted to and, therefore, attached to someone.

as one of aurora's songs go :
"I tell myself I have to build defenses
'cause once you are in love, you are defenseless
everything was easy when it meant less"

i think Shun's main deeply held negative beliefs about the self are being unlovable, worthless, unimportant and broken.
Ikuo and Dai's instant connection may have triggered Shun's severe fear of abandonment (the feeling of being insignificant and easily replaceable) and the negative self-belief of being not good enough (here for Dai), being broken, forever devoured by the darkness of the past, unable to feel the sense of simple human joy, unable to feel free in existence and just be, unable to be happy and make the people he loves happy. struggling with what others have naturally and easy. crawling where everybody runs.