elixirgood

My Thoughts and a Male’s Perspective on This Drama

There are many morals to learn from this beautiful story. I still believe the novel was more in-depth, imaginative, creative, and overall more beautiful. However, the drama was also wonderful, offering a portrayal much closer to reality.

Many people say the story is cheesy or that it’s unrealistic for the female lead (FL) to behave the way she does—never forgetting her first and only love. But in reality, our first love often stays with us, no matter how hard we try to forget. We remember their name and face. First love is meant to be a lesson, but in this story, their relationship was special—they grew up together as children, adolescents, and adults. Honestly, it’s been 15 years since my first crush, and I still remember them. We don’t forget; we just get used to it. I don’t blame the FL for not being able to forget her first love, especially since their relationship never truly began. She has lingering feelings, unanswered questions, and misunderstandings that need to be resolved before she can know if he is truly the one for her. Waiting 2-3 years isn’t unrealistic; if it were 5-8 years, that might be harder to believe.

JQX’s character was well portrayed—a child mentally abused by his mother, never given the chance to discover his own likes and dislikes. He was indoctrinated to become an academic weapon, living out his mother’s frustrated dreams. Her mother probably never learned to heal from her own strict upbringing. We must remember she is human too; everyone lives only one life, and not everyone knows how to treat their child. Sometimes, parents are afraid their children will suffer as they did. While her actions were wrong, she likely didn’t know how to give love or understand a child’s point of view, having never received love herself. She lost one child and probably feels guilt and remorse, drowning herself in work and pushing her remaining child to succeed. Her temper and narrow view of life—focused only on success, glory, and money—were mistakes. We see her start to heal at the end, when she learns to make JQX’s favorite lotus steamed bun. Only after losing what she had does she realize her mistakes and begin to understand that life is about more than just work.

Now, regarding JQX’s actions toward his first love, LYT: From the way he looks at her and spends time with her, it’s clear that LYT was his hope and hero during his darkest times. She helped him discover what he liked and wanted to do, beyond just mathematics. Of course, he wouldn’t want her to forget him. Some might call this selfish, but can you really expect a young adult to control his emotions and be completely independent, especially when the person he loves is right in front of him and he knows she loves him too? I don’t think anyone could. If I knew it might be the last time I’d see someone I loved, I’d want to kiss them too.

It was wrong for JQX not to tell LYT he would be gone for a long time, but he’s a young adult who excels academically but doesn’t know how to communicate with loved ones. He’s never experienced failure, and probably thinks failing makes him a loser. He believes the person he loves deserves only the best, not the worst, and fears LYT won’t love him if she knows his true situation. From a male perspective, I understand this feeling—wanting to take care of someone else while struggling with your own problems. JQX helps his cousin pay bills by working multiple jobs, which makes him even more exhausted. In the drama, they added construction work to make it more realistic, since just tutoring wouldn’t cover all the expenses.

Even though the drama doesn’t explicitly show it, JQX wanted LYT to have a chance to move on and live her best life, since he wasn’t in a position to choose her. His own shame and assumptions led to misunderstandings between them. He thought LYT wouldn’t understand his hardships, since she was always cared for by her family. Not being able to provide for her is something no man wants. If you can’t take care of your loved one, her parents won’t feel at ease.

In the drama, Yu Qiao finds JQX, but in the novel, it’s LYT who finds him. She discovers his photo posted online tutoring at a child’s home in Hong Kong, visits her uncle’s family, and searches for JQX at his campus. After a long day, she waits for him at his apartment, gets sick, and JQX finds her and takes care of her. This was different from the drama, where the landlord helps her.

The moral of this drama is that life isn’t always rainbows and sunshine. We need to communicate with our loved ones and not always expect the worst. It’s important to have friends and cherish the people you love, no matter the difficulties. Communication is key to happiness—trust, understanding, honesty, and expressing love through both actions and words.

I could go on about how this drama is a gem. I do think the transitions between timelines were rushed and not as smooth as in the novel. I also liked how, in the final episode, Yu Qiao and Ye Yun finally express their feelings for each other. I hope these two secondary leads get their own drama and story someday.

The drama was well-acted by these amazing actors and actresses. It’s a pity that, to me, the story felt rushed—it could have been executed better. However, I really enjoyed their reunion after his two to three years of disappearance.

I really hope so, because there are so many miscommunications throughout the drama. The story feels rushed, jumping from one timeline to another without much smoothness. It definitely could have been better. However, I understand that the budget likely played a big role, especially given today’s economy. The sanctions from the United States are having a significant impact on China. I have relatives in China, and they say that the tariffs are hurting the economy, especially for the middle and lower classes. This probably why it was cut down to 24 episodes but who knows. It’s such a pity—this drama could have been a real gem in modern Chinese television.

You make a good point, but remember that in a small town like Qushan, you see the same people every day. It’s not easy to forget your childhood best friend—having a best friend as a child means the world, especially in a place where everyone knows each other.
LYT and JQX were each other’s best friends, and she wouldn’t forget him easily.
During the time the drama portrays, there’s no technology, so kids rely on physical activities and spend most of their time together. This makes their bond even stronger.

At seven years old, most children don’t truly understand what love is.
In my opinion, LYT felt pity for JQX because he was always sad and quiet.
By spending time with her, JQX gained a new perspective on life.
(figuring out what likes or don't like) The drama isn’t unrealistic in showing how a lonely person can be deeply affected by someone who cares about them.
Do you really think someone would forget a person who cared for them so much, even after a lifetime? Especially a lonely JQX?

JQX was controlled by his parents and didn’t have the power to confront them. He couldn’t do anything about leaving LYT, and he didn’t want to stop writing, calling, or responding to her.
But his mother was toxic and blocked all communication with LYT.
Being hurt by a best friend leaves a lasting trauma—it’s not something you forget easily.

JQX has his own way of protecting those he cares about. It might not be the best solution, but he can’t always tell what’s right or wrong.
His IQ is high, but his EQ isn’t as developed.
At first, he didn’t want to recognize LYT because he wanted to protect her from rumors.
Since dating is prohibited for adolescents in China, he was concerned about her reputation, which is important for getting into a good school or college.
LYT, on the other hand, doesn’t understand this and is carefree, always doing what she wants.

JQX is more mature for his age and tends to overthink, worrying about hurting LYT. Of course, no one can control their feelings—JQX is obsessed with LYT, just as she is with him.
But because he’s more mature, he understands reality sooner. In adult life, love isn’t enough; you have to think about practical things like food, rent, and education.
Do you think LYT, as a young adult, would understand JQX’s actions, especially when he’s working over 40 hours a week to help his uncle? Maybe she would, but would her parents let their only daughter suffer in those circumstances? A man that can not take care of his beloved one was deemed not worth of marrying... or being together at least. JQX grew up in a well establish income family not experiencing what is to be poor.

Yes, it was wrong for JQX to leave LYT without telling her, and selfish to kiss her deeply and ask her not to forget him. But can you really control your feelings for someone? Remember, JQX originally planned to leave without saying goodbye—he didn’t plan to kiss her, but LYT took the initiative. JQX probably fell in love with her when they reunited in high school, and he couldn’t control his emotions.

I applaud JQX for facing adult reality and taking responsibility for his life after cutting ties with his parents. He wanted to experience the harsh reality of life and learn to take care of himself. You can see his growth as he studies, earns money, and tries to improve himself without help. He probably realizes that his obsession with LYT could hold her back, too. But when you love someone, you always find a way to reconnect. If it’s meant to be, you’ll find each other again.

It’s sad that such a high-quality drama was squeezed into only 24 episodes. Only if this drama had at least more than 24 episodes to give us both perspective on life... more people would understand this gem of a story. If you read the novel, you can understand the story even better.

I don’t really understand why people take so many things for granted without giving them much thought. In my opinion, this drama is meant to resemble reality. Back in the 2000s, both China and Hong Kong experienced hard times as well as good times. ZLH portrays a character who is smart and mature, thinking about what kind of future he can provide for the girl he loves and cherishes—beyond just love. He understands the importance of being able to support himself after cutting ties with his parents, and now he wants to take care of his cousin, who is in the hospital (which follows the script of the novel).

To me, ZLH’s portrayal of JQX shows how much he loves and cares for LYT, played by ZJM. He doesn’t want her to suffer with him, especially since LYT grew up spoiled by everyone around her, particularly her parents, who adore her and always give her what she wants. Many may not understand JQX’s actions, but can you really blame someone who is lost, who doesn’t know himself or what he truly wants, except for having LYT by his side? After being freed from his parents’ control, JQX owes many favors to his cousin, who took care of him and mentored him about life. When someone helps you during hard times, you feel obligated to return the favor and help them in their time of need. Unfortunately, his cousin had an accident and became bedridden. JQX has a deep connection with his cousin, whom he considers an elder brother, and wants to help his family in any way possible, just as they helped him. This is a matter of courtesy and gratitude—there’s even a saying about owing your life to someone.

I agree with those who say JQX gave LYT hope with the deep kiss and gifts, which symbolized his desire to be with her for a lifetime. From lipsticks to red shoes, these gifts signified, “I want you to be my wife.” It was selfish of him, knowing he wouldn’t be able to stay with her for long. But can you really blame a naive boy, barely an adult, who doesn’t yet understand the harsh realities of adult life? Can he control his emotions in front of the woman he truly loves, especially when LYT took the initiative to kiss him first? JQX was planning to leave in secret, but sometimes things happen for a reason. I would say he was a jerk if he had sought out LYT first, but in reality, LYT found JQX. It’s not entirely his fault for giving her a final kiss before disappearing.

Some might say it’s disrespectful to have no time for your loved one, but JQX was working over 40 hours a week without enough rest, having cut ties with his family. He was facing the harsh realities of life. A man who cannot face reality is not worthy of taking care of someone else.
JQX is supposed to be more mature compared to LYT, who is just learning what reality truly is. Out of love and care for LYT, JQX thought the best way was to suffer in silence and let her forget him, since he couldn’t give her the time she deserved. Many may not understand, but when a man cannot sustain himself, he doesn’t feel worthy of being with the person he loves. If you were a parent, would you want to take on the burden of caring for your daughter and her boyfriend? If the boyfriend has a conscience, he wouldn’t feel comfortable or valuable enough to take care of his loved one.

Hypothetically, if JQX had told LYT about his situation, would she truly understand the harsh realities of life? Would she know what she truly wants, beyond just being with JQX? There’s no happiness without suffering—you always choose your own pain. Sometimes in life, you meet someone and instantly feel a connection. There are no words to describe this feeling; you just sense a spark. I believe this story is portraying that spark during their early high school years.

At first, when they were kids, they just wanted to be friends. For JQX, LYT was a source of hope during his darkest childhood memories, helping him slowly discover himself. You have to see things from the perspective of a young person, barely an adult, who is still working on discovering himself, especially since his only happiness revolved around LYT, without understanding the difficulties of adult life.

In the end, I think many people misunderstand JQX’s actions because the drama gives minimal portrayal of his perspective. I really wish the drama had at least 30 to 33 episodes to show more of JQX’s life. From watching, I can tell that sometimes, loving someone means letting them go if you’re not sure you can give them the best life. It’s a pity the show didn’t depict JQX’s suffering from childhood, before meeting LYT, and his time in Hong Kong. Society often expects men not to show suffering, as if showing weakness is unacceptable. I think that’s why the drama doesn’t really show this side of JQX.