Bai Hehuai Lover

the gold standard

I doubt there's anything I can say in a review that hasn't already been said but I'm a yapper and I want to leave reviews for everything I watch, so...

There's a reason why this show is the entry point to CDramas for a lot of us. Engaging mystery, fascinating lore, fun and fluctuating character dynamics, beautiful romance (even if it had to be made a bit more subtle due to censorship), fantastic soundtrack, gorgeous costumes and visuals, brilliant acting... I could go on. Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji are indeed iconic and are the definition of soulmates - they'll break your heart so many times in the flashback portion and make you ecstatic beyond belief in the present day. I loved that the show had the guts to discuss darker themes such as genocide and really makes you sit with the horrors that humans are capable of and, through Wuxian, we see people brave enough to stand up against such atrocities regardless of what the personal cost is to do the right thing. I also love media that discusses grief and trauma, and these themes are baked into the DNA of the show. It's just very poignant and touching and honestly relevant to real life and I love the story so much.

Incapable of giving this a full 10/10 bc the misogyny was crazy and we need to talk about it.

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crazy level of misogyny for a show that wants to be perceived as female led

I love revenge stories and a revenge story centered on a female assassin? Sign me up! Unfortunately the show prioritizes Murong Jinghe over Mei Lin in every way - he repeatedly puts Mei Lin in horrible (and deadly!) situations because he views her as expendable and only cares about how she can further his plan to clear his name and then once they start working together as partners and he starts to care about her, the show goes to great pains to be like 'oh but he's sad about treating her badly now' SHUT UP. (Murong Jinghe's character arc maybe could've worked if the narrative didn't want me to ship him with Mei Lin, but since it does, I hate that man passionately. And don't twist what I'm saying, absolutely no hate to Liu Xue Yi, he did a fantastic job with what he was given and I would love to see him play an actual villain.) The female characters are all interesting and different from each other and then they all repeatedly risk their safety for these awful men. You know that quote that's like "I will not set myself on fire to keep you warm"? Yeah, the women on this show sacrifice absolutely everything for the men they love. Also this show had no idea how to wrap things up and the final third really drags.

If you don't mind spoilers, about 6 months ago I actually made a video essay (https://youtu.be/jIexOU_As-4) where I explained how much I disliked this show

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would've been a masterpiece if not for the ableism

The set up is really good and the mystery is really compelling and then everything is ruined bc around the halfway point the show decided to be really stigmatizing about D.I.D. It sucks because the acting is phenomenal (esp Namkoong Min), I really liked most of the characters, you're constantly on your toes with clever misdirects or the show hiding a moment from you to be revealed later and then it recontextualizes another scene, the humor is great, the villains are horrifying (and so infuriating) and easy to root against... there really is so much that is great about this. But I cannot in good conscience give this a higher rating because the outright harmful depiction of D.I.D.

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"Blood River will never be anyone's pawn again"

I have a lot of disorganized thoughts (even more than I'm putting here lol) bc it's only been like 3 hours since I finished the final episode, so I'm still digesting everything.

So let's start off with the reasons why I LOVED this:
- The ENTIRE thesis of the show is "We have to completely destroy corrupt systems and build new better ones from their ashes and sometimes violence is unavoidable but we should be striving for peace. And also love is the reason to do any of this." Obviously this show is of the fantasy genre so everything is amped up and exaggerated, but the parallels that can be drawn to the real world.......... yeah. Genuinely revolutionary in its thinking.
- I 💗 revenge, so watching everyone who tried to control Blood River get murdered was soooooooooooooooooo satisfying
- Su Muyu being such a hopeful and optimistic character and the narrative typically aligning with him (although the last few episodes kind of grind that hope into dust which I am. less enthusiastic about)
- The polyam vibes of Su Changhe-Su Muyu-Bai Hehuai made me have such an intense spiral. You do not understand how obsessed I am with them. Every duo is so good, they are so important to each other and need each other in different ways and... I cannot talk about them for very long without having a breakdown. I love them SO much.
- Just the relationship progression and character development generally speaking (minus a few exceptions — please, I don't wanna talk about how forced and unearned and insufferable the instalove Tang Lianyue/Mu Yumo dynamic is)
- Certain events that feel like one-offs but then end up being very relevant to Su Muyu or Su Changhe (i.e. things we learn about the Hell Palm and going demonic. iykyk)

things that were frustrating:
- So many characters who were really interesting that just disappear and are never acknowledged again: i.e. Hongying, the Water Official, Mu Ciling being kind of major players in the Shadow Sect arc and then.... just nothing after that
- It feels like there were certain things being set up that just never got resolution (i.e. rebuilding No-Sword City)... I get the feeling that there were times when the writers wanted to go in a different direction than they ultimately did bc the novels kinda trapped them to have certain things happen so that Blood River still fit in the same universe as Dashing Youth and TBOY

IDK, I like putting my immediate thoughts out but I really do need more time to digest this one I think. If I'm being 100% honest, I am not completely satisfied with the final episode but overall I still think this show was really solid and it's definitely one of my fave CDramas (or at least at time of posting I feel that way).

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abuse but frame it as an epic romance ✨

what if I were a genocidal tyrant who wanted to wipe out your clan and you were a naive and innocent girl who accidentally freed me from my prison and you endured my violence and rage bc you're a Good Woman™️and you dedicated yourself to rehabilitating me and loved and defended me and were willing to die for me and chose me over your people even though I was still planning to commit genocide on them👉🥺👈

EXCRUCIATING endurance test that I forced myself to undergo due to how popular this show is and my attempt to find the appeal. There are some kernels of interesting ideas here but the show is entirely too devoted to this abusive romance story and Dongfang Qingcang being rehabilitated through "the power of love" to actually explore any of them. Orchid is also infantilized to an insanely uncomfortable degree - she has baby voice and behaves like a literal toddler - which is another layer of discomfort to their romance, but honestly it's very easy for that objection to fade into the background after the first ~third of the show because DFQC is just so aggressive and cruel literally all the time. And then the fact that every time I see someone complaining about the romance it's because "Orchid is annoying"?????? Like we didn't sit through 20-something episodes of DFQC choking her, repeatedly threatening her (and people she cares about), sexually assaulting her (most of those kisses were literally not consensual!), just being generally angry and mean and yelling at her and calling her stupid.... Like, sure there are some moments they have in isolation that are nice, but then as soon as you think of the context of the previous episodes any "soft" moments they have become incredibly nauseating. This is literally one of the most blatantly misogynistic pieces of media I have ever seen and the audience reaction to it boggles my mind.

other notes:
- gorgeous costumes. I loathe DFQC but I can't lie, I am obsessed with literally every outfit he wore. his whole aesthetic was just *chefs kiss*
- not enough sword fights for a xianxia :(
- acting: at the start I was pretty impressed by Dylan Wang's performance but DFQC is just angry and screaming so much that it got really old. Like what is impressive about a dude raging out for 36 episodes? I don't think anyone in the cast was bad, but no one really stood out the way Dylan did and. again. his role got old. Those scenes in the first ~10 episodes or so where he was confused and/or irritated by experiencing Orchid's emotions after centuries of repressing his emotions were pretty funny (and basically the only humorous scenes that got a laugh from me) and tbh I think those were the scenes that showed off his talent the best too.
- music: probably a solid third of the soundtrack irritated me to no end. That horrid discordant music that kept playing during villain scenes literally activated my fight or flight response every time I heard it. There's another third of the soundtrack that I actually really liked, but the music felt like it rarely matched the tone of the scenes and that romantic ballad from the opening credits kept being used at the worst moments
- Changheng I love you I'll never stop loving you 💗💗

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not bad but I never clicked with it unfortunately

Two women decide to spend lockdown together when a pandemic hits and as they spend more time together, they start to fall for each other. It's a good set up and the two actresses have good chemistry. I think part of why I didn't vibe with this though is that for the first couple episodes, before they really know each other at all, their interactions just feel so forced? Sophie nearly drowns and Abi rescues her and then Abi is basically laying on top of her for like a solid 5 minutes with maybe 6 inches between their faces when that is not at all necessary or helpful esp if she's not giving Sophie mouth to mouth lol. Then shortly after when Abi is bringing her stuff into the B&B, there's this (longer than necessary) scene where they're pressed up against each other as they try to pass each other on the staircase and they're stuck and... idk. A lot of the first two episodes just felt extremely inorganic to me. And while I'm not asking for realism in everything I watch, I do want moments trying to progress a relationship to feel plausible and not just like the writers are pushing the two characters together bc that's what the desired narrative calls for, you know what I mean?

Abi's storyline about having breast cancer was really poignant and provides a nice through line for the occasional moments that get philosophical about mortality, and that plot thread really improved my view of the show in the final few episodes (even if it irritated me that the narrative was very staunchly against people choosing to enjoy their final months as much as they can when faced with a terminal illness instead of undergoing treatment even if the odds aren't great that said treatment will cure someone). I honestly just liked Abi a lot and I thought her interiority was good and learning about her illness made everything click about why she would want to stop planning and abandon this idealized life she had attained, as well as also making sense as to why she was so closed off. Sophie was okay at times and downright infuriating at other times (do not get me started on the scene where she upsets Abi and then asks if she's PMS-ing) and she did unfortunately occasionally give the vibe of "straight girl who wants to use a lesbian to experiment" which... didn't help with my lukewarm feelings towards the show. Idk. Good concept, mediocre execution I guess. Overall though, I'd say it's cute, moderately drama-free, and simple enough to be worth a watch if you're looking for a GL series.

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top tier GL!

I was honestly really underwhelmed by the first episode, so I was expecting this to be a fun and silly time but I didn't think I was going to get very invested in it. I am so very happy to have been wrong! It's pretty simple on plot — you can easily ignore the whole "the mafia is after Phethai" aspect as it's pretty peripheral for most of the run time, and the rest of the show feels very slice of life with its focus on Pun, Ploy, Prang, and Jay. While the mafia subplot adds a splash of danger to the story, it's for the benefit of building Ploy and Pun's relationship that that thread has minimal presence overall.

Pun and Ploy's dynamic follows an established formula that we've seen countless times in romance stories. They have been emotionally wounded over and over when it comes to love and they initially treat this as a game — Pun's ulterior motive is to try to get her money back from Ploy's brother via seducing Ploy, while Ploy is testing to see if Pun's feelings are genuine as she doesn't believe anyone can truly love her as a result of her fractured relationship with her mother. The first 4 episodes are a lot of fun as Ploy and Pun flirt a bunch, but Pun keeps chickening out from going further and only initiates a kiss when she gets nervous that Ploy is losing interest in her. Pun is basically all in by the first kiss (even though she still wants to get her money back and withholds this situation from Ploy), and Ploy, known for never getting into serious relationships, clearly quickly develops feelings for Pun as well. It doesn't take long for the two of them to enter a relationship after that first kiss, but unfortunately the honeymoon phase doesn't last long because this secret and we enter the angsty phase as Ploy turns cold due to knowing that Pun is lying to her. This show works as well as it does because of the great performances by Ice Amena and Memi Muanfun. The two actresses clearly put so much thought into these characters and they have sizzling chemistry and nail each phase of the PloyPun dynamic.

The start of the angst is actually when I went from "oh this is a cute and comforting show" to "wow this is REALLY GOOD." The character work that is done in this section of the show is exceptional — we fully understand why they were both so closed off before becoming involved with each other and how devastated they are to be apart; but we also innately understand why Ploy can't bring herself to believe Pun was genuine and why she repeatedly pushes her away. And while this angsty period lasts for a relatively long time given there's only 12 episodes, it is absolutely necessary for the audience and the characters to sit with this as it has to fully sink in for Ploy what she has given up, and Pun has to rediscover what she wants outside of their relationship as she had dropped basically everything to be with Ploy. (Plus I'm an angst lover, so I love when a show likes to twist the knife on me lol.) A lot of my favorite scenes from the entire show happen in episode 10 when we get to see Ploy's perspective after their break up — that scene with the butterfly collage completely and utterly destroyed me.

If you're looking for a GL to watch, I can't rec this one enough. It's truly near perfection.

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utter perfection

So given I didn't give this a perfect 10 out of 10 when my headline is "utter perfection," firstly let me say that as far as I can tell Janine Gutierrez is not wheelchair user and I find it to be borderline impossible to call disabled mimicry positive representation. The disability advocate in me feels like detracting one star isn't enough of a penalty honestly. But... the story is just so special to me and I adored practically every second of this show.

While disabled mimicry is never acceptable and it's depressing as hell that it's still happening, the show effectively calls out the infantilization from able-bodied people, the assumptions and intrusive questions about the cause of a physical disability, the desire to categorize disabled people who accomplish things as inspiration porn, and how the lack of accommodations makes so many seemingly mundane locations inaccessible to people with mobility aids. Obviously Harry can't be fully 100% independent given her body's limitations, but she WILL push back whenever people treat her as incapable or try to baby her. Seeing her just live her life and watch Luna be her #1 defender against careless people or anyone who underestimates Harry's ability was healing honestly.

Luna has an invisible disability - a sleep disorder. It causes havoc on her life and most people don't take it seriously and chalk it up to her being lazy or making bad decisions. As a bit of a night owl who can't get more than 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep..... whew the way other people treated her disability hit too close to home! Harry is seemingly the first person to take her disability seriously and treat it with empathy.

The two of them have incredible chemistry and the progression of their relationship - while fast given the show is only 6 episodes - feels natural and real. Their meet cute of the two of them wandering the hallways and practically running into each other was, dare I say, iconic. I had the biggest smile on my face when Luna came by the studio after Harry made her plea on her show to see her again. There's a tender (and hot!) sex scene!!!! Two disabled women had sex on a tv show that I was able to watch with my very own eyes!!! And the scene where Luna said I love you for the first time!!!!! I was giggling and kicking my feet and twirling my hair around my fingers. Like the development of their relationship is just so so so perfect and cute and sweet and I love them <3

anyway I know I'm relatively new to the GL world but this is hands down the best GL I've seen so far and I struggle to see how this can be topped.

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real and full of a lot of heart

While I do think the writers bit off a bit more than they could chew, I thoroughly enjoyed this! The first half is really cute and fluffy, but then the second half dives a bit deeper into Suzume's fears and insecurities. While I do think some of these heavier hitting ideas deserved to be explored more - for example, truly grappling with what it means for them to become a couple when Suzume is Keishi's boss - I do think directly bringing up these topics was important. We needed the full picture of why Suzume was so reluctant to admit his feelings so the audience can understand the true gravity of Suzume overcoming those fears and confessing how he feels to Keishi. I mean Suzume has (presumably) spent multiple decades closeted and that is a mindfuck that most people cannot fully understand. He had gotten so accustomed to his solitary life, but then spending time with Keishi made him aware of just how lonely he actually is. Of course the idea of being in a relationship is going to be terrifying to him! Especially when you add in the age difference and the fact that he is in a position of power over Keishi - any repercussions are going to hit Keishi harder and it would be his fault.

I also think the show deals with very real queer experiences in a genuine way. Again, as Suzume has (presumably) spent his life closeted, we see his repression - not in terms of sexuality as there is never a moment of him denying being gay, but in this sense that he feels he doesn't deserve or can't have certain things that are considered normal for straight couples. Keishi and Suzume are caught by the office gossip, and the guy immediately jumps to the conclusion that the two of them are dating just from the two of them being in the same place outside of work - Keishi calls this out as being inappropriate and it (eventually) leads to this coworker questioning his biases. There's also the fact that prior to that the office gossip had repeatedly tried to pressure Suzume to use a dating app to find a girlfriend, and he is rather relentless about it, giving the audience a sense of how suffocating it is to be on Suzume's end of this situation. There's surely other examples I could offer too, but they're escaping me at the moment. Idk, this show definitely isn't perfect, but if nothing else I think it gave a valiant effort to start some conversations.

Also the size difference 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

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underwhelming start but it picks up in the second half

Given a quick skim of the other reviews for this show, it seems like a lot of people hated the miscommunication and were frustrated by Shirasaki Yuki's struggle to pick up on Hayama Asami's feelings given their intimacy. Honestly as someone who typically hates miscommunication, I think it makes sense here - Hayama has been pining after Shirasaki for years and is unsure of how to admit those feelings (been there, rip) and Shirasaki keeps overhearing things that make him misinterpret his dynamic with Hayama (also Shirasaki's struggle with social cues gives maaaaaaaajor autistic vibes. while he frustrates me at times, I could never hate him.) They're both convinced the other cannot possibly reciprocate but desperately want this relationship to be real as their feelings continue to deepen as they keep "pretending" to date outside of the "Hiru no Yume" set.

It honestly took me until episode 4 when Shirasaki started to realize he was developing feelings for Hayama before I was fully locked in. And then episode 5 gave me SUCH a buzz when we saw their "rehersal" kiss intercut with the on-set first kiss. Seeing the continual push-pull of their dynamic as Shirasaki tries to turn off his feelings and protect his heart was entrancing, and Hayama's willingness to go as far as Shirasaki asks bc he just yearns so much for him was thrilling. Like I honestly was shocked by how much I enjoyed the drama due to their struggles to just admit they like each other.

Honestly, I think my biggest frustration with the show is that they successfully create a sensual atmosphere (in large part due to the soundtrack I think) but then most of the physical intimacy doesn't live up to that energy. The first kiss that leads to them "fake dating" is pretty awful, although it makes a lot of sense to me that Hayama would want the kiss to be very tame to not push Shirasaki into the deep end immediately. And most of the kisses up until the last couple episodes are very chaste, which just kinda makes you feel blue-balled as a viewer. The fact that they are rather adorable in their more tender moments does help ease this frustration a little though.

Also I need to say that Komagine Kiita totally makes this show. He's brilliant in the two episodes from Hayama Asami's perspective. Devoted loverboys are everything to meeeeeeeeee <3

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loving your reincarnated soulmate no matter what form they take <3

I went into this with no expectations but hoping it was cute since I love the concept of "guy loves his soulmate regardless of their gender" and then I was hooked immediately, watching the entire thing within 24 hours. I love how in your face the soulmatism is from the start - the red string scene made me laugh so hard, the way San recognized some qualities of Wad in Vee even while he was in denial about Wad reincarnating as a man, Vee feeling an immediate fondness for San even while San is being very detached and stand-offish. And maybe I'm just dumb but other than being like "Suchat has to be working with the villain" given how aggressively he tried to keep Vee away from San, I did not see any of the plot twists coming.

My main criticism is things happened too quickly. Like, I can buy that Third and Vee hanging out and San becoming jealous as a result would prompt him to confess that he likes Vee and for them to start properly dating. But San is basically giving a love confession at that point and it's just like... how did we go from denial to a love confession in ONE episode??? And when San has spent 4 episodes desperately trying to avoid Vee because he's trying to escape the gay thoughts, so how is it love already? LOL. That said the chemistry between DaouOffroad is fantastic and by the time we're hitting maximum angst, you have no doubt that they love each other deeply and would sacrifice anything for each other. Also I love how soft and tender SanVee is!!!!!! No surprise, episode 6 was my fave - seeing San trying to pursue Vee and openly flirting, taking Vee on a romantic night out that culminated in their first time, San's dream where he relived a bunch of important moments he'd had with Wad but now he was seeing Vee in her place (sidenote: the editor went CRAZY HARD on this show and I love it so much). Ugh this was so good and made me so giddy and it has become one of my fave BLs. Will definitely revisit this one in the future <3

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two stories rolled into one - one is pretty good, the other is underwhelming

So as I say in the headline this is two different shows mashed together - the first is about the power struggle between two families that hate each other and Cheoljong/"So Yong" (Bong Hwan) falling in love despite all the manipulations of those two families, which is mostly really really excellent; the second is the time travel gender swap which left a lot to be desired. I think a lot of the reason why I'm struggling to view this as positively as many other viewers is because Bong Hwan's interactions with women for like.... at least a solid half of the show is just so sleazy and creepy that I find it impossible to view those scenes as anything other than sexual harassment and the behavior of a guy who doesn't accept hearing "no" because he views it as a challenge. While there are glimpses of the Cheoljong/Bong Hwan romance throughout, most of the development to that thread happens in the last ~40% of the show, and for reasons I don't want to spoil, they spend 2 episodes mostly apart. Like it just really ends up giving the vibe that the writers were uncomfortable with male-male intimacy and it just makes me wonder why the Chinese novel this is based on was even adapted in the first place then.

Although I feel that there's a lot of room for improvement with the handling of gender identity & sexual identity, I totally understand why this gets so much praise. The acting, costumes, and set design are flawless. The jokes (when they aren't thinly veiled cissexism, misogyny, or homophobia) are really really funny. The Cheoljong/Bong Hwan romance is genuinely moving and it's hard not to root for them as we see how much they grow to care about each other. Also I have Cheoljong brainworms I love him soooooo much you don't understand. Anyway, I think the really avid fans are overhyping this, but it is a lot of fun and I definitely think it's worth watching.

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flawed but iconic

Originally watched this in 2021 and felt the desire to revisit it given the details were a little bit fuzzy. It's obviously not perfect, but it holds up decently for the most part. The concept is honestly fantastic but there are times when the execution is pretty clumsy (i.e. the scenes depicting domestic abuse sometimes felt gratuitous, Miw's very unnecessary biphobic comments, Shin and Miw making out (more than once!) when Shin is gay, so much tragedy surrounding Mae). Even so, I'm always happy to add another entry to the small list of canon polyamory on screen :) I also really really appreciate that 2 of the core 3 are sex workers, as it's difficult to find media about sex workers that isn't full of contempt towards individuals who work in that profession.

This show is intense and thrilling (even with the low production value), and because of everything the trio goes through, it's easy to understand why they develop a deep bond (even if I think the Miw-Neo dynamic could have used a bit more buildup).

anyway I love gay men I love bisexuals I love trans women I love polyamory I love threesomes. thank you Thailand 💗

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addictive and fun but the plot is incoherent

So okay. If you’re watching for the plot of Gong Ziyu and Yun Weishan’s romance (the main appeal for me tbqh), this is a 10/10. I love them so much I have severe brainrot about them. If you’re watching for the plot of attractive people scheming and manipulating each other, it’s a 10/10. If you’re watching for the literal story of the Gong Ziyu vs Gong Shangjue rivalry and everything to do with Wufeng…. it’s more like a 5/10. Once you reach the last third there are SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many inconsistencies, there's new lore introduced in like the final 3 episodes that's never really explained it's just kinda out of nowhere to make things harder and more dire for the protagonists, and the villain's plan is just dumb and convoluted. ALSO FUCK THE LAST 5 MINUTES FOR THAT ABSOLUTELY UNNECESSARY CLIFFHANGER. That being said, Kill Me Love Me WISHES it was My Journey to You lol, Mei Lin looks so incompetent compared to Yun Weishan and Shangguan Qian it's just embarrassing.

Anyway, I watched this bc I loved Zhang Linghe in LBFAD and I didn't like what that show did with his character, so I wanted to see some of his other work. He was also great here, I love Gong Ziyu so much. Yu Shuxin really impressed me in this after feeling her role in LBFAD was uninspired. Tian Jiarui has less to do in this than in Fangs of Fortune, but he (unsurprisingly) did an incredible job here and he was such a menace lmao. Lu Yuxiao and Ryan Cheng were also fantastic. The cast does so well with their roles, and while the writing is a mess, everyone brings a lot of depth and layers to these characters. The show works because of the great acting, the solid character arcs, and the intriguing (and constantly shifting) relationships.

Also can we talk about how 2/3 of Gong Zishang's screentime was her sexually harassing Jin Fan??????? It wasn't cute and funny, it was deeply uncomfortable and I really don't like that the writers had him reciprocate her feelings....

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absolutely must watch if you like wuxia or xianxia

I'm actually reading Legendary Siblings right now (a little over halfway through) and it's incredible how closely Handsome Siblings follows the novel and manages to expand upon it a lot as well (so far Hua Wuque honestly feels like a non-charater given the novel exclusively follows Xiaoyu'er). The first ~25% of the show is pretty slow and the first two episodes are borderline insufferable to get through as most of that time is devoted to the Ten Great Villains and the sisters of Yihua Palace, but I was immediately charmed by Xiaoyu'er when we meet him at the end of the second episode and I was even more intrigued when we meet Hua Wuque in episode three. It's a delightful journey watching the two of them change as they wander the jianghu and most of the characters they meet through their travels are very fun as well. Xiaoyu'er and Hua Wuque's dynamic is obviously the highlight of the show and there are no words to describe how psyched I was when they agreed to work together. I also loved Tie Xinlan soooooo much and her dynamics with both Xiaoyu'er and Hua Wuque were top tier. I also just think this is a really valuable watch if you like wuxia or xianxia because you will notice how Gu Long has influenced the genres.

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