As You Stood By

5 brilliant episodes

The good:

-this is a drama with an important topic and for about 5 episodes it was more than brilliant. Lee You-mi's performance alone was so outstanding as victim of heavy domestic abuse, I really hope she gets every award possible for the role.

-for the first half, the drama managed to capture the fear and emotional extreme situation of victims of domestic violence - and for a change (which was good!) it showed that domestic violence is not only happening in low income, low background areas (how it is depicted most often) but also in high society, where abusers use their power and money to cover up their crimes easily.

-some things were shown very realistically- for example that Cho Eun-su, herself traumatised by a violent father figure in her childhood, could do any sort of artificial self-defence training as much as she wants, when the actual real danger situation occurs with a very violent real attacker, who is much stronger than her, she has no chance to fight him for many reasons. That's an important lesson for women if you want to learn how you might really have a chance defending yourself against a real attack - and it's none of the artificial fight sport trainings, as they are that - artificial, with opponents who only do a certain set of artificial attacks and moves, and stop when it starts hurting.


the bad:

- from episode 5 on many things didn't make any logical sense anymore and logic was thrown out the window for the sake of creating cliffhanger situations and thriller elements by the writers.

-it didn't make any sense that Jang Gang looked exactly ( as in more a clone than a twin) like No Jin Pyo - and on top, he is in the very same area of Seoul AND for a very strange resaon to start with Cho Eun-Su sees this very identical person while trying to retrieve a stolen luxury watch. Propabilities for this are simply zero. As for the character of Jang Gang, they could at least have worked with small prostetics, like changing his (veeeery distinctive!) ear shape and giving him false teeth. A character like Jang Gang with his background does certainly NOT have super white, straight perfect clean Hollywood teeth. As he is shown as a heavy smoker and with a criminal street past, he would not have these perfect teeth at this age in any universe.

-While, as always, Jang Seung-jo delivered an excellent performance in both roles, the figure of Jang Gang didn't make any realistic sense to me. The switch from being a submissive, quiet, stuttering low job worker to full blown, crazy laughing psycho? (And this crazy laughter was stolen from 'my name' genius psycho role Do Kang-jae by the way) Nah, sorry. If that guy had been that kind of uncontrolled psychopath, he wouldn't have worked for a long time for Jin So-beak before and he wouldn't have stayed hidden and low profile in general. Also he really did have a family (wife and child) in Shanghai as can be seen in the airport footage shown, so he comes back to threaten Hui-su and his whole demeanor changed? Nah, someone like that, if he would go back to blackmail her for more money, he would act at least normal to stay low and get the money - like he did before. To act out like a crazy person in the middle of the city doesn't make sense and was just written like that to create a fear and danger situation for the two women.

-Also factual mistakes began to show - when Jang-Gang comes back to threaten Hui-su, while he does have the dead man's phone, why would he suddenly have the door passcode to the appartment? If so, he would also have the pass code to the safe. So again, this situation of Hui-su hearing the beeping code of the door and a man just entering her place was just written to create horror and fear, but without brain, as the guy wouldn't have had the pass code.

-While Jin So-beak was a fantastic character for himself, his connection and will to risk his own life, business, everything for the two women didn't make sense either? Why would he do that? Was he attracted to Eun-su from the start? Well, after a while, honestly, nothing came of it, so in reality, a guy like him would simply have lost interest in her and her situation. The drama never explains his motivation to any degree that would make sense of his actions. The fact that 20 years ago he lost his son (something he and Hui-su have kind of in common but he finds out very late anyways) was not a motivation for all he did then.

-the police sister of the villain - didn't make sense in many situations either. So what position did she actually have as an officer? How is it possible she can spend almost all her work time alone (and not with at least one colleague) doing all the things she does? That wasn't realistic at all.

- my biggest problem comes in the end: so, to give this ( as it is a Netflix production after all) a forced moral message, they ruined the end for me. Both women admit to their crime, give apologetic and 'wise' statements in court - and don't even tell the truth? The truth was, yes, they had PLANNED to kill a man, but, (which was realistic) he found out about that plan, and what actually happened was that HE attacked both women brutally and was about to actually kill Eun-su, when Hui-su, in actual SELF-DEFENSE! - killed him to prevent him from killing her friend. In every normal universe, a defense lawyer would have brought this up and followed on it to reach a not guilty-verdict - and it would have been the truth! Instead they create this Kindergarten-morality, and Hui-su saying she killed her husband?

-And it gets worse! Eun-so has her turn too to tell the jury how 'guilty' she is - and says something I find highly problematic. She actually blames herself in retrospective, as in when she was a very small child and had to endure her violent father beating and abusing her mother- and she says and implies that little children are at fault for reacting with ignoring such situations when they are over? NO! Little children NEVER have ANY fault in howEVER they react to such super traumatic situations! It is a very wrong, and dangerous message to tell any victim of also former domestic abuse, that it was in any way their fault when they were just small children.



Result:

Stellar acting performances, especially by Lee-You-mi, a good start of a storyline with a very important topic.
Sadly for the sake of creating thriller and tension elements, the writers threw logic out of the window in many scenes from episode 5 on.
While this would have had great potential for important messaging to try to enable and encourage victims of domestic abuse to at least try and get help, they ruin this message in the end by letting the two women repent like sinners and give off messaging that is the opposite of encouragement.

And yes, I get it, they can't end such a story on the note that the women get away completely unbothered because they would probably get legal trouble concering encouraging people to kill their violent spouses.
But they would have had a chance to show that even IF the women get to court, they CAN get a good defense lawyer who, in such crass cases of abuse and a killing in self-defense, (maybe even adding temporary insanity due to not only her own life being in acute danger, but also her having to watch her abuser killing her best friend and life anchor) could have reached an acquittal instead of a prison sentence.

Acting and idea 10 - storyline decline and very questionable messaging 3. - I'd still give it a 6 because of the partly very good acting performances.

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