Una Pareja Perfecta (2025)

Aaaaaabsolute Disarseter

This, I imagine, is what the first draft of the script for "A Perfect Match" looked like:

Scene 1.
[A wet dream.]
[Morning wood.]
[Lingering shots of Xiao Nan showering. Ummmm…. Aaaaaaaaabs.]
[Lather. Rinse. Repeat.]
[Product placement.]
[Dead parents.]
[Gran sad.]

Scene 2.
[Nan's late for an interview. Saves a girl.]
[Boss bad. Girl his sister.]
[Product placement.]
[Dead parents.]
[Gran sad.]

Scene 3.
Evil woman: Flirt with me. I’m the straight devil.
The Villain: I will, baby. Now fuck off, Nan, you perfect-bodied handsome god, you.
[Note to casting: Make sure the villain is the ugliest member of the cast.]
Xiao Nan mewls.
[Lingering shots of Xiao Nan (and the villain) showering. Ummmm…. Aaaaaaaaabs.]
[Lather. Rinse. Repeat.]

Scene 4.
[Xiao Nan and The Boss meet, get drunk, and talk about...]
[Dead parents.]
[Lingering shots of Xiao Nan showering. Ummmm…. Aaaaaaaaabs.]
[Lather. Rinse. Repeat.]
[Product placement.]
[More product placement.]
[Near kiss. Even more product placement.]
[The little girl is a brat.]
Director’s Note: All very well, but where’s the dialogue in this?

Scene 5.
[Introduce a supportive fujoshi.]
[Product placement.]
[Yes, this whole episode is for product placement. It's called multi-level marketing.]
[Lingering shots of Xiao Nan showering. Ummmm…. Aaaaaaaaabs.]
[Lather. Rinse. Repeat.]

Scene 6.
[Boss and Xiao Nan play tennis.]
[Both take their tops off, for no apparent reason.]
[Ummmm.... Aaaaaaaaabs…. Peeeeeeecs… Niiiipples....]
[Boss has an unexpectedly hot body.]
Xiao Nan's Thirst: That tattoo! Wreck me daddy… Destroy me king…
Xiao Nan: I think I might fall in love with you. So, I'm going to go.
Boss: I like you too, so I'm going to let you go.
[Brat sister screams.]
[The villain wants a second serving of Xiao Nan.]
Everyone: Who doesn’t?

Scene 7.
[Brat sister screams again.]
[Xiao Nan shows he can bitch-slap.]
[The villain wants a rematch with the boss. They play tennis. The boss wins. Obvs.]
[The hotties kiss. Finally.]
[Gran sees.]
[Gran sad.]
[Fujoshi consoles.]
[Product placement.]
Director’s Note: Seriously. Will there be any meaningful dialogue in this show?

Writers: Aaaaaaabs…olutely not.

Scene 8.
[Gran sad because boy loves boys.]
Gran: You a whore?
Xiao Nan: No....
[Cut to Xiao Nan, who's now having rampant, rambunctious sex with Boss.]
[Camera cuts back to Gran again, who’s suddenly happy, for no reason whatsoever.]
[Product placement.]
[Lingering shots of Xiao Nan showering. Ummmm…. Aaaaaaaaabs.]
[Lather. Rinse. Repeat.]

Scene 9.
[Tennis match. Someone wins.]
[The villain creates a conflict. Let’s see, he pretends to be injured so that the boss can be jealous?]
[Boss jealous.]
[Lingering shots of... ]
Writers: Wait. What the fuck? Where's the shower scene? What's going on?
Director's Note: I think we've had enough showering, don't you?
Writers: Aaaaaabs... so.. fucking... not!

Scene 10.
[The leads reconcile.]
[Xiao Nan becomes a wife and a cook.]
[The kid's still a brat.]
[Gran's a bit useless.]
[Beach trip. Shirtless frolicking. Ummmm... Aaaaaaaaabs.]
[Product placement.]
[They all live happily ever after... in a surprisingly tiny flat.]
Note from the Producers: What?!?!? That's it? The final scene is not of the boys showering together? After all this fluffing, you won't even finish us off?

Verdict:
This is one of the worst shows I have ever seen. I loved it.


Reader’s Digest:
DO SAY: sPectacular...
DON’T SAY: exPectorant...

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rocket paced BL with tennis window dressing

Overall: they needed to eliminate some side plots and/or characters and focus on the relationship development between the leads. 10 episodes about 9 minutes each. Aired on iQIYI https://www.iq.com/album/a-perfect-match-2025-1n53v7boirx?lang=en_us

Content Warnings: past child abuse, past death, non con touching, slap

Watch Suggestions (to remove an episode 11 (in this case ep 9) curse)
- watch episodes 1-7
- can skip episode 8 unless you enjoy watching tennis
- skip episode 9 (super annoying plot cliche)
- start episode 10 at 2 minutes

What I Liked
- visuals
- intimacy
- supportive friend and grandma
- how grandma pushed back on the thin and beautiful comment

Room For Improvement
- so many tropes and not done in a new/fresh way, I originally was going to rate this as 8.5 but the ep 11 (happened in ep 9) cliche dragged my rating down, so if there hadn't been proof then that would have been the end???
- choppy/rushed, it's daytime then suddenly nighttime, characters rush off somewhere and then we see them talking about what happened, they needed to cut some side plots/characters to spend more time on the leads and their relationship progression
- that actress looked to be 10 which was much too old to act how she was acting, needed to have cast a child around age 5 (and also why wasn't she in school during the daytime/work week???)
- that a character said "I'm a person, not a bargaining chip" (was going to give points for "love isn't something you can hand over" but then that character agreed to something in the next scene which annoyed me
- (neutral) I didn't take off points but the tennis is window dressing, there is barely any shown in the 10 episodes with most in episode 8
- (neutral) there are a ton of product placements but they got the series made so they were fine

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