Kim Yoonmi 김윤미 金潤美

Remember what the set up was? For HER the marriage was 100% about *her* getting to have the dream she wanted. For *him* it was a romantic set up, but he needs a life outside of her. If he was honest with her up front, then the expectations change, the relationship changes with it.

For her, she hated him, down to the core. She had no attraction to him. She only agreed because she was desperate. She had no romance, so for her, the speed of the relationship was always off. What she needed was clarity on where they were in the relationship, which something like Perfect and Casual addressed in the later episodes, which this drama lacked.

Telling people that they should magically come together and it should solve everything is wrong. This is a terrible way to conduct any kind of relationship. You need clear set boundaries on both sides.

Telling me, that a woman who was teased and ostracized, in her PoV should 100% automatically fall for the man and then know automatically how he feels and then be comfortable 100% with the relationship when in her mind he has a woman before and he's played her before... that makes no sense whatsoever. Where in her original set up was she head over heels for Boyan? She wasn't. You forgot.

This also makes no excuse for Boyan not being mature enough to sit her down and say, "Hey, let's talk this relationship over and talk about where we think we are in the relationship because I realize everything was out of order and my feelings and trust for you are higher than yours in these areas, but your trust for me is much lower in these areas". You need status updates in mature romantic relationships. It's not magic. It's clear set boundaries and expectations you both work on.

They are both at fault for overreacting to every argument they had and neither tried to play peacemaker, which is why they are going to divorce in five years.

The contract was set up on the condition that she get the career she wanted. If he wanted to renegotiate that, then he should have been like, we need to talk about our relationship, where we think we are and renegotiate the contract. The contract can be redone with a new one. He doesn't have to wait for the year to come up.

This happened in Nige Haji, which shows a far, far more mature look at how marriages actually work. There were upsets. So they sat down and talked about it. There were more upsets, so they talked about it. She decided because of his loss of job, that she wanted a career helping others, so they had to rework the contract again. This is also true of "Because this is my First Life". They renegotiated the contract a few times. This is also what relationship experts say must happen in long-lived romantic relationships, and that every 3-5 years, you have to renegotiate the contract. If there are upsets, you need to renegotiate the contract.

So, I think your idea of romance is immature. it's not living 24-7 for the other person when you have no idea what their intentions are. It's being clear on your boundaries and what you want out of the relationship and be willing to receive what they give you.

Jianan was never about the romance. Why are you expecting her to be suddenly because she got married in order to fulfill her career ambitions? Someone needed to play peacemaker, but as neither could during the drama, they are going to divorce. No sit down and chat... no longevity.

If you're going to hate on her, hate on her for at least some solid reasons and not unfeminist ones.

I noticed a lot of the reviews hate the female lead for all the wrong reasons. OMG, how dare she care about her dreams and her own merit and talents. (This was her whole character set up from episode 1, but nooo... let's make sure she's abused and then say that's the right way....)

Also things like, how dare she care about her friends and not care primarily and only about the effing male lead.

I think this is a total failure of feminism. How dare she not be absorbed into an abusive relationship with the male lead? You realize that a woman that has to care about the male lead 24-7, who has no friends, who is not allowed her own dreams and aspirations is in an abusive relationship. And excusing male behavior like, saying being irrationally jealous because he's "the man" is totally inexcusable.

Also, the headspace in which people say it's evil that a woman on a production would act out a scene and let a man touch her hair... yet they are watching a drama where two actors are kissing, and they are likely to have significant others breaks my brain. Like seriously, you're vilifying the female lead for that, but don't hate on married women for acting in dramas? Double standard there.

If anything, the weakness of this drama is the inability to find way to evolve the conflict between Jianan and Boyan. The character set up from episode 1 is that he *fell* for her *because* she had this impressive, yet looked like impossible dream he'd been trying to support for years on end by choosing his job because of her. But then he got irrationally jealous and tried to control her actions, which contradicted his character set up quite a bit, and put him into the abusive category. But somehow that's forgivable and Jianan is 100% at fault for having dreams and not being about her man, all the time, not Boyan who betrayed his fundamental principles in order to control her....

What this drama really needed was for the characters to grow beyond their initial write ups and then also evolve the conflict a bit more. Boyan also needed a life outside of his workplace so he wasn't so dependent on Jianan. This is kind of why the ending falls apart. There is no long chat on what they should do to resolve conflicts between them. (Which is not a spoiler, BTW, but I said what didn't happen, not what did.)

The fault is with both of them for different reasons... but a nice long chat and some agreed upon boundaries would have solved it. But the characters never really grew. Jianan never really came to trust her own talents. And Boyan is still insecure at the core because he's trying to make Jianan his everything, which isn't healthy at all.

So, acting, no, characterizations, no, the problems are solely on the event structure, which should have challenged the characters to change more, especially the second half.

She got added after I mentioned it. Thanks for the confirmation, though. She must be a reincarnation of Qian Yu... ;)

Watched every single last drama from the beginning and when they were airing. *hides fandom again*

You should complete them all.

Yep, that one. Pretty terrible. Also had YM in it. I tried my best to forget that drama. I wish I could give it a negative rating. Why do cis het men find sexual assault sexy?

https://kisskh.at/30535-the-wrong-royal-bride

No, it came out this year, I think, so it wasn't Yunxi--also web drama IIRC. Much shorter. Clocking something like 24-36 episodes. Plotline was girl has Instant! marriage with king in arranged marriage (across borders, IIRC), he tries to sexually assault her the first night, her maid lectures her about how if she didn't fight back and he's her husband anyway, so she must be in love (I choked on my vomit around then) and then declares she wants to be the best at medicine. He's already poisoned when she meets him. She's from that era, unlike Yunxi. She rolls over instantly. He tries to sexually assault her two more times in the span of 6 episodes (elew) and the female lead's maid lectures about how because she couldn't resist she must be in *cough* love. *shivers*. The story ends with her finally curing the poison which has somehow lasted for the entire season by using "blood" medicine where she takes on the poison and not telling him that she is doing so in an epic noble idiocy. It also failed all the feminism tests and was written unsurprisingly by a man. I thoroughly hated the entire storyline since the other characters were 100% unlikable, except for the female lead who got killed. This was unlike Yunxi, which actually did pass the feminism tests.

The reason I hated it so much was how much it failed every marker of something decent. It was horrible from episode 1 to the series end. I don't abide by women falling in love with donkeys who assault them and because they can't sufficiently resist, they somehow are in love with them and somehow this story is supposed to be marketed for women. Got so little notice for obvious reasons. Absolutely terrible.

Different days, not same day.

I'm just hoping it doesn't end like with the other drama (forgot the name of it because it was that horrid) that came out with the male character poisoned and she sacrifices herself for him. I would like the female lead to gain more agency, though, considering her tragedies.

She actually is, but she doesn't put the ML first. She thinks about everyone, which is refreshing to have a FL that's not failing the Mako Mori test out of the gate. Like, him, she's balancing different interests instead of melting into a puddle of nothing just because OMG ML is here and I have no motivations outside of him because women should ONLY live for and about men.

She, like him, thinks about his family, her family, her friends, and how to save her own neck. She puts EQ above everything. But because they are both trying to find a way to balance those things, like in a true healthy relationship, sometimes the way they balance those things clash. This is a sign of relationship maturity and is actually how marriage work (though not with the collective lying).

If you are in a marriage no matter your orientation or sexuality where you believe your spouse or your spouse should devote all their time and motivation to you--it's abusive. A real relationship should be dynamic and should be negotiated over time. And this is what I appreciate about this drama. Both the ML and FL have motivations that aren't solely about the relationship, which in turn affect the relationship and the relationship also affects their motivations outside of their relationship.

The series is still being subbed on the official channel. This is because subbers are human and not robots, and usually it takes a while for a series to be subbed well. Also, people pushing for subs are making some of the channels use auto-translate apps like Google translate, so I'd encourage less of asking for subs faster, and more episodes, and so on and more of saying THANK YOU for your hard work... so we don't get screwed over with substandard subs, which happened in some of the dramas as of late. Think of the feelings of the subbers when you comment about subs.

Am I wrong in thinking that the Chinese Medicine doctor (The one that said stick out your tongue, and then you, give me your pulse...) is https://kisskh.at/people/17434-li-nuo?

Watch Go Princess Go.

Tea Boys is an adaptation of the term "Tea girls/women" which comes from Go Princess Go. Go Princess Go defined it as basically someone who is or acts sickly, and thus a victim, but in actuality they are very scheming. (i.e. the idea is as you drink tea, you can see the leaves at the bottom, so you know what they are about.) Maybe also named this because they are so sickly, (or pretending to be) that the only thing they can do is drink tea.

You can see another 100% Tea Boy in Bloody Romance, This one, though is more of a 90% Tea Boy. Mostly Tea Boys are marked with super long half up hair and are poisoned/sickly, and usually wear long flowing robes, in a majority of the time white. They tend to be super into the arts and scholarly, but not upright scholar type with a strong sense of justice (More like Chaotically good or evil, sometimes you don't know which). People go gaga over Tea people, as Go Princess Go points out, and that people are a sucker for them. (Because they are so pitiful... and front so well, but the opposite sex usually hates them instantly. So het Men spot tea men faster than the het women do and visa versa. This is how you know it's a tea guy.)

This is in contrast to someone who is a Fog Man/Woman. Like in the Chinese dramas where there is a person that usually leads the person into a fog, and then traps them and usually drains them of their life energy. So the character believes their lies, but finds out later they got poisoned and are trapped and now need to escape and they were never on their side. (See Love and Redemption for an example of the worst Fog person I've ever seen.) In this case, everyone will hate the Fog character universally want to stab them. The more abusive and manipulative they get, the more people will hate them.

His acting is a bit more precise in this drama, imo. But it depends on which character he plays, mainly. He has been playing a ton, ton of tea boys lately who have been getting more and more scheming, but he should deviate a bit more.

Be patient. The subber is working on it. If you want the subs to go faster, say a thank you and donate, if you can to their cause. If you can't do monetary, then a warm thank you for their hard work will help encourage them to finish the subbing. People often demand subs and say do them faster, but don't come around to say thank you. Believe me, a small thank you will help them more than you think.

More of a light-hearted feel most of the way until episode 7 when the plot starts to take off. The relationship is a love-hate relationship with Tsundere elements on both sides. The mystery is light and spans pretty much the entire drama so far They solved it to the audience pretty much right away. It's a matter of the main character catching up to it. It's more romance-heavy in some ways. Less thriller/conflict heavy.

To get a clue, Maiden Holmes has more cases and happenings so far than this one has for the same time span and also got accused of being romance-heavy.

The male lead is an interesting character, at least and not the typical fair. They rapidly develop him.

The female character's set up I feel a bit more wishy-washy about.

It gets its teeth in Episode 7.

Who is the kid actor that plays Bao? He's not in the cast list.

I have a feeling that the censorship board gutted their script because I caught bits that were hastily written and made no sense... But the poison was the reason he was tsudere. I heard the novel is really good though. Much funnier, and more entertaining.