PaperWizard

I just noticed this is the week for long reviews. It's a sure sign it was a good episode. I don't really review, but I do like reacting to the characters. And Sandee was certainly interesting this week.

But I feel that was maybe a bit too much redemption for the single act of Sandee starting to reclaim ownership of his actions. People don't mend themselves quite so suddenly and even when when we mend of unhealthy thoughts and habits, we turn back to them sometimes. So I am not sure this resonated realistically with me. Sandee was handing a lot of his bad choices by claiming he was just setting destiny back on its path. This is instead of taking ownership of his own feelings and choices. It's sometimes easier to do that, to say we're avenging on behalf of someone else instead of owning up to the fact that we're acting on our own anger and disappointment. Realizing that Phai had changed destiny should have come with a lot more than the realization that choice is what mattered. Sandee should have taken that empowering realization and had a moment to just soak up the idea that even if destiny were sculpting their lives, it doesn't excuse his actions. That's the core of morality. The idea that regardless of what is happening around us, we are responsible for what we choose to do and why. And having reclaimed his agency and with it his surrendered sense of responsibility, I wanted to see him embrace guilt.

Which he never did. He embraced the idea that he was responsible for apologizing, withh Phai's urging. But that's not the same thing as accepting and being able to really feel that you did something wrong.

So I am glad Sandee is starting to turn himself around, but I am not sure he's the one actually doing the turning, or that he's actually gotten anything out of the change in direction. It's Phai changing things, not Sandee. Which may not represent actual growth for Sandee's character. We'll see.

Phai was interesting too. I liked his confidence in his choices. I like that he distilled the direction of another person's path down to a single moment when that path could be forked in a healthier direction. Very intuitive of him. And very efficient. But he needs to be careful because it can also backfire. I think Phai will be fine so long as these moments of distillation are just as much about reclaiming his own sense of empowerment as redirecting Sandee's actions. I am not a fan of characters or even real people who spend their time trying to fix others. But if Phai was also reclaiming a sense of his own individual power to shape his destiny at the same time he was helping Sandee come to some healthier ways to see the world, then sure. This was a win all around.

Phai's empathy is a really powerful attribute. But sometimes he's got that mad manipulation gene his brother has. That maneuver where he put Thanu and Wayu in the same place with Sandee was very high handed of him. And it was painful for others. Did it give him some additional closure, yes. But that was an unintended side effect, not the reason he organized the affair. That sort of manipulation should be reserved as a very last choice, if ever employed at all. It should not be S.O.P. or else he'll end up in Kit's situation. The backfire with connecting Wayu and Thanu's hands was the exact reason you don't do this sort of thing. You cannot force people to come together on your terms or your schedule.

What I really was completely behind was him helping Kit out. That little human ship is very rudderless and it makes me want to ask him over for tea and advice. I try not to meddle, but if anyone ever needed a bit of guidance... And joy. Kit needs people in his life to remind him to play. In lieu of Mark being able to, it was nice to see Phai do it.

I was also pleased to see Phai and Wayu communicate a bit. We've not gotten much of that but what of it we've gotten this season has been very purposeful. But Wayu and Phai are good for each other. So it was nice to see them really connect again.

That was... a lot. I needed a breather just to take it all in. And as usual the characters are fascinating. Last episode I had a bit to say about everyone. This time I think I have a lot to say about fewer of the characters.

The acting was great this episode. Everyone did an amazing job. But it was Bas and Bank Toranin that really knocked it out of the park this time. Bank T. always gets credit for bringing a lot of pathos to Pok. But I am not sure why some people insist Wayu is single note character. I don't think they're watching the same show I am. He's got the widest breadth of emotional display of any character in the drama. Which makes a great deal of sense. He's the most emotionally open character. We've seen him angry, grief stricken, flirty, reticent, jealous, joyful... Bas nails it all. The only thing Wayu can't do by definition is be mean spirited or malicious. So at this point I am handing in the towel and refusing to try understanding what others see or don't see in Wayu.

However, I do have some more thoughts on Wayu myself. Wayu is caught in the middle of a difficult situation and he feels kind of powerless to escape it. And I understand why. Sometimes we get in a situation where we can't avoid hurting someone and it can be really awful to have to choose which person we hurt. It's even worse sometimes just sitting there trying to rationalize the choice. Who deserves to be hurt more? Who less? If neither of them do then what other criteria can be used?

It's enough to make a person freeze where they are and refuse to make that choice. And that's where Wayu is. But that's unsustainable because it drags everyone's pain out, building tension. And eventually something snaps from all that tension, which is never pleasant. In this episode what snapped was Wayu.

Wayu has a very real problem. If he makes it clear he's choosing Thanu he will feel really guilty about hurting Pha, and at a time when Pha's health is so fragile that demoralization could have terrible consequences. And I agree with Wayu that you don't kick a dog when they're down. But there needs to be a happy medium for him because Wayu's emotional health matters as much as Pha's and making himself miserable (and unwell?) in order to give Pha the motivation he needs to fight his illness isn't going to help anyone in the end.

Objectively we know why it's happening. Wayu is a very moral person with a very developed sense of empathy. And these are great qualities but he tends to be horrible about giving away too much of himself. Everyone needs something in life that only other people can provide. Wayu needs someone to sit him down and tell him it's okay to be a little selfish. It's okay to love without guilt. It won't be easy for Pha or Wayu, but in the end it will be best for both of them. Pharawee is a big boy. He's already come to terms with losing Wayu through his own choice. And he's a good person. Knowing Wayu is tearing himself apart trying to reconcile the situation without hurting anyone would be as painful for Pha as being outright rejected.

Thanu could make the difference here for both of them. His head/heart is on straight but sometimes his honorable nature gets in the way of his instincts. It's a good flaw to have but Wayu and Pha both could benefit from Thanu being a bit more direct. We don't always articulate what we need, or even know what we need sometimes. Wayu needs Thanu to be there. Thanu doesn't have to withdraw to give Wayu freedom to choose. We draw emotional as well as physical strength from our fellow humans. Wayu is hurting and feels powerless at the moment, but Thanu at his shoulder might be enough. Thanu is perfectly suited to help this way. He's an immensely comforting presence who is warm by nature and unusually spare with his wisdom. Perfect for supporting someone without imposing on them.

And Pha might be better at ease knowing Wayu has that support. He's possibly dying. Pha is certainly fighting for his life. Worrying for Wayu isn't good for him. So Thanu's legendary loyalty and patience is going to pay off but waiting for Wayu is not what Wayu, Pha or Thanu really needs. All three of them in their own ways need Thanu there, supporting the situation by supporting the person he loves most.

Thank you! I am glad you're going to give it a try. There's a lot to love there. I find the performances nicely nuanced and the story was solidly compelling. And it lacked the one thing I see in so many dramas; people doing things that make no sense for the character. In this drama every character's actions are driven by their motivations.

Now Pok is another interesting character. He's the classic young, hot tempered lover. But outside that stereotype he's actually a deeply hurt person. He has invested a lot of his pride in his sense of personal accomplishment and undermining that has left him painfully conflicted. The fact is, even if he finds out that his score the same as Sandee's the principle of the matter still will hurt. That Tong didn't believe in him. He obviously felt very acute but deep love and lust for Tong, from the beginning. And he has a poorly developed ability to reason through the hurt and anger he rightfully feels at the deceptions happening around him. He's tends to revert to that anger as a go-to in the face of strong negative emotions of any type. It's compounded by the fact that he didn't feel like he measured up to Tong's natural intellectual talents. And so shame is thrown into the mix. And it created this vortex of bad decisions, unresolved passion and hurt. The fact that he's by nature protective and affectionate gets buried under his inability to process in the moment. It leads him to make unfortunate and sometimes even deeply unhealthy choices. I think the time apart from Tong will help Pok clarify his feelings and sort out the anger from the hurt. And if things in the plot become more balanced in the mean time, Pok may develop the one skill he seems to lack. Forgiveness.

Tong. Oh where to start. Tong is not the first person of leadership quality to slip up and let his arrogance lead him to make a grave error that sticks with him. To his credit, his mistake wasn't born out of greed, but a very deep love. But that love has lead to some startlingly self-harming habits and also Tong's propensity to submit to degradation as a means of reparation and redemption. So, so unhealthy. To his credit though, when he realized he had hurt someone near him (Sandee) he tried to apologize and to make amends instead of playing it off. So he can process guilt in healthy ways. But because Sandee is vindictive by nature, Tong is trapped in a loop. Protecting Pok, the person he loves, was how he ended up in the mess he's in. But in the corner he's pinned in by his own mistakes and Sandee's crusade, all he can do is strive to continue in that direction. Which robs Tong of the ability to address his sins, deal with his broken heart, help his love flourish into something healthy, or stop the malevolent influence of Sandee. So the scene where he helps Pok from the shadows is kind of a perfect metaphor for where Tong is trapped right now. That's all he can really do. Protect Pok from the shadows. And until he can free himself from that trap, he won't be able to move forward.

Phai. I am a lot less enamored of Phai than others, if only because he's the one character that seems like a plot device. But assuming he's not, letting go of Thanu was emotionally smart, and for his age very mature. It showed a certain strength of self. Visions or no, he never had Thanu to begin with. But Phai wasn't bitter about it. I think that's the good thing about him. His downside, he holds onto his unhealthy friendships, even when he should perhaps be setting boundaries instead. He's tried putting distance between him and Sandee but then reaches out. So it's a token effort at best. It telegraphs that the threat of severing his relationship with Sandee if he doesn't stop hurting people is empty. And that's a real problem. This passive sense of no consequences shows that Phai himself has a moral grey area that otherwise doesn't show. He's willing to decide for everyone who has been hurt that Sandee hasn't gone too far. At some point Phai is going to have to be more proactive about stopping what's happening. I worry he won't be, though.

Now onto Sandee. Hm. I feel really, really bad for Sandee. I know that sounds counter to common sense. But bear with me. Yes, he's obsessive. Yes he's spiraling. Yes, in the real world this pattern of behavior easily leads to dangerous ends. But from the other side Sandee is a person with obvious mental health issues. He's obsessed not with destiny, as so many people think. He's obsessed with fairness. Justice. He started dropping off a steep cliff when his fellow student council member cheated and didn't get punished. That it wedged wide open something already broken inside of Sandee isn't Tong's fault. But Sandee was set off anyway. And from there he reacted to the other percieved injustice in his immediate circle. When Phai was hurt by Thanu, Sandee saw it as another grave injustice to be fixed. He's become obsessed with setting wrongs to right. To the point where he has sacrificed his entire happiness, including his friendship with the person he loves most and his entire support network of friends. He' isolated himself. So now, when voices of reason would be most consoling and helpful, he's alone because his malevolent obsession has driven almost everyone away. And as lonely as he is, he obviously sees it as the sort of persecution that is the price he has to pay for doing the right thing. Which is so, so sadly deranged that I have to feel sorry for Sandee.

I find a lot of the comments on here needlessly mean spirited, so I almost never come on. But I really wanted to say that I am loving the show. Even the villain is well developed.

Wayu is a great character full of charm, charisma and warmth. And for all that he seeks out the wisdom of other people, Wayu has a good emotional head on his shoulders. Yes, he's very immediate and honest in his emotions. But that's healthy. I love male characters in solid contact with their emotional selves. Wayu isn't afraid to show his grief. He is sweet, loyal and has a quiet elegance to him. I think he's not dull, he's decorous. I really love that he's instinctually nurturing but also very protective. His capacity for love and forgiveness seems to suggest a deeply generous nature. Generous as too few people are. And I think that generosity of spirit fuels his hope, even in the face of harsh reality. Like he wrote on the slip of paper for the jar "Love, love. Even when it hurts." That's him in a nutshell. Accept the awful and try to survive it, but then hold onto what enables you to love again. That he suffers a lot is just his journey. It's kind of a crucible that will enhance him as he goes through it and in the end it will help cement his trust in himself.

Kit is very responsible on the surface, and austere. But underneath he's this complex mix of opposing impulses. He is loyal and capable of being very warm. He just has very unfortunate hangups about showing that affection to Mark. I don't exactly understand that since he is unreservedly warm with Pha and Wayu. He's so soft with Wayu it's like Wayu is another brother to him. So Perhaps it's because of the depth of his feelings for Mark. Maybe that depth of emotion scares him a great deal. Kit needs to stop reacting to every hiccup in life as if it's the moment when he will be hurt. He needs to stop treating his relationship with Mark as if being hurt is such a foregone conclusion that he lashes out or makes rash choices in anticipation of it. He needs to learn that allowing himself to express love isn't handing over his power. And Kit needs to allow Mark to help him feel safe being vulnerable with his lover. Let those walls down. And stop being dishonest as a self defense mechanism. Everyone accuses Wayu of being fragile, but Wayu has come through the fire and is still giving his love without fear. It's Kit who seems fragile to me. And I have a lot of sympathy for him. One of my big hopes for the season is that Kit stops being so afraid.

Mark throws out loud affection like he's fishing for security. Except with Wayu whom he knows will always love him unconditionally. It's an interesting contrast. He's very generous of heart, and in his own way very hopeful and optimistic, like his best friend. It's clear they grew up together, both understanding love as something beautiful. But Mark is a bit too invested in pleasing people, which is just another sign of deep insecurities. Like Kit, he too is very afraid of something. Mark seems to have a deep, instinctual fear of rejection. He just expresses it differently than Kit. Mark becomes brighter the more worried he is about proving himself. He needs to stop trying to hold onto love through bending himself into unnatural shapes, just to get approval. He needs to find it in himself to be brave with Kit and let his true opinions and his more honest self be seen, without fear. He needs to take off that mask and give Kit the chance to love him for who he is, instead of who Mark thinks he needs to be in order for Kit to love him. I feel like Mark's journey will require he learn to find in being bold and honest with Kit. That's the kind of trust he already has with Wayu, he just needs to cultivate it with Kit. I have a feeling Kit needs it too.

And Thanu. That is one very impressive character. He's very selfless, noble and pure-hearted in a similar way to Wayu. And like Wayu he's very protective. They both have a very developed gentle side as well. I think they have the potential to be a healthy couple because both Thanu and Wayu understand love the same way. But Thanu has a visceral strength happening at his core, instead of Wayu's more emotionally central strength. Thanu's character seems full of symbolism. He's an archetype. Warrior, artist, intellectual. The classical Asian ideal. And episode 5 introduced a level of sexual appeal that was unmistakable. So he has a lot going on. I am very intrigued by his knightly qualities as well. And his very aggressive side that peeks out occasionally. Though to me, Thanu's most enduring qualities are loyalty and patience. He has consistently shown both when dealing with Wayu and others. And I think that patience and loyalty is what will win him the day. He's not prone to reactionary moments. He's lonely, but ultimately very secure in who he is as a moral person. He is the single most secure person in the show. He may win, he may lose, but he does so with his dignity intact and prepared for the consequences because he knows who he is. You see this in his acceptance of Padbok's anger. He made a choice in the past and he stands by it, and accepts the consequences so long as they don't spill over onto others.

The main four characters present a lot to appreciate. It's just one of the reasons I love this drama.

I am new to Perth, but he seems like a nice kid. That he's such close friends with Bas Suradej tells me the negative rumors about him are false. They usually are.

I hope he does well. Now that he's changed managers there should be less drama.

I have wondered myself. I don't care one way or the other what spectrum his sexuality falls into. I love him the same no matter what. But he definitely pings my gaydar sometimes.

Yes. I love Copter and Bas together too.

I think, from reading, that I must be the only person in the world who found him on Gen Y first. I haven't seen 2 Moons yet. But I'm looking forward to it. I'll probably wait until Gen Y 2 is over first. Bas is very easy on the eyes and he definitely pings one's inner protective streak too. Which is unusual. I really enjoy his performances.

He's quite charismatic. Plus, yes, he's super cute and adorable. I can't wait to see more of Bas.

Bas rocked it. That is all.