PaperWizard

I simply offered several pertinent situational factors that might influence Porsche's ability to integrate into the bodyguard corps in a short period of time. That's hardly over analyzing.

Nothing Porsche did in episode one offsets his actual age. The character of Porsche is still around the age of 19-21. And that makes Porsche, as I stated first on my list, still very young.

You may find his antics in episode 2 silly. Some people, myself included, found them consistent with his persona based upon the factors at hand, including his age. And I think you'll find that not all mature LGBT members of the MDL community feel about Porsche's behaviors in episode 2 the same way you do. Myself included.

Guilt, like any other human emotion, can be guided by rational reaction mechanisms. It isn't inherently irrational. Just like fear, hope, longing, or any other emotion it's only detrimental to us when we don't think through to the source in order to decide if it is actually a warranted or healthy response to the circumstances at hand.

Kuea has had a lot of upheaval in his life recently, and more than one person manipulating circumstances to influence him in negative ways. And while this does indeed affect our ability to sometimes experience emotions based on rational structure, it doesn't permanently impair them. So Kuea may surprise us yet.

This is not uncommon or bad. Many parents raise their children not to concern themselves with their parents' debt because their children's' lives are not beholden to them. Nor is the debt belonging to their children.

In life it is best to reserve guilt for the things for which we are actually responsible. Kuea is not responsible for his parents' financial choices nor is he responsible for their choice to shield him from the knowledge of their problems. Therefore he need not carry any guilt over either.

This post made me laugh. Catholic radio. Lian's relationship with Kuea does remind me of this. Twice the guilt for half the redemption and no way for Kuea to come away from it feeling good about himself.

I think in this situation we have to remember that:

1. Porsche is very young.
2. Of all Porsche's many tools at his disposal-determination, courage, selflessness, humor, intelligence, cunning-I notice that wisdom was never a part of him. That will take age and experience.
2. Kinn did in fact try to force him into the job, at the cost of his life if he refused. That Porsche escaped was incidence, not plan. The only reason Porsche accepted the job later was because he was rather forced into the job by circumstances outside his control in order to save his family. He's not there by choice.
3. He's had to give up his freedom and his family to conform to a lifestyle that is nothing like anything he has ever known. Adjustment takes time.
4. He's come into an antagonistic paramilitary organization, many of whom resent his very presence. That can make one very reactionary. Understandably so.
5. He's used to solving problems in a way that doesn't work in this situation and it's going to take him a moment to learn the rules of this new way of life and to adjust and learn new strategies for problem solving.

He'll work it out.

Very nicely said. You covered a lot of ground and kept proper focus.

I have watched the show and found it to be execrable. And also toxic, as well as dismissive of agency, among many other problems. Although I do not have the inclination to come on every week and post about that, there is nothing wrong with doing so, even in a heated manner.

The idea though, that there is a separate standard for positive feedback as negative is problematical to me. Just on a quick read through I've noticed several people insisting that criticism should be constructive. Nothing could be further from the truth. Whether criticism should be constructive is based upon the desired outcome of that criticism and the environment in which it's given. This is an informal space, with few guidelines and so there is no need to concern ourselves with being constructive unless we wish to. Everyone is allowed to share their opinion on the show, no matter what that opinion is, no matter whether it is constructive or not.

This was not what I expected to find when I popped in today. But I suppose here we are.

The digital age presents many challenges for professionals working in mental health. Particularly for doctors, therapists and counselors trying to uphold a nuanced code of ethics and maintain boundaries between their personal and professional digital presences.

There is a code of ethics regarding social media and the significance of providers' identities as mental health professionals. And the most frequent and appropriate way in which they speak from a professional standpoint is when communicating with fellow professionals in their field. They only invoke their persona of mental health care professional in posts that directly relate to therapy services or mental health treatment in an appropriate environment for doing so. Outside of that, especially on informal and unrelated commenting areas meant for personal use, they do //not// ever bring their professional role or identity into play. Furthermore, depending on the situation, they can face consequences for doing so. Certainly they do not give advice or qualitative judgments from a professional stance.

To do so is irresponsible in the extreme. I advise no one here to ever take any advice or guidance from anyone on a forum claiming their opinion bears the weight of experience in a mental health profession. This is not the appropriate environment for that and citing a background in mental health care as reinforcement for an opinion or stance is not ethical.

I have wondered if this show was written for teenagers who can sometimes romanticize these sorts of unhealthy relationships.

While I agree on the surface that Kuea and Diao are very sweet, I have to disagree that they should date.

Please don't think I'm condemning the idea of them as a couple, I am simply saying that going on what we see in their reactions to Lian and Yi, they both need to step away from romantic relationships and gets some therapy. They need time to build themselves up into whole, healthy people in the aftermath of their abusive relationships, and heal.

Once they've healed, I can definitely see them being fit and ready to be together.

I found myself watching it because BPG asked me to. And... I was going to drop it after the first episode but then my curiosity piqued. I wanted to know exactly how bad they were going to get with Lian and Yi and Jay and Nuea(?) before having them reform. I was also curious about how they would reform them.

Not because it's at all entertaining but because at this point I think I might point the show out to a professional colleague who is gathering terrible media examples for a teaching course.

Those who dislike the show have the same right to post on MDL as those who enjoy the show. The friction in the community doesn't come from the negative reviews. It appears to come from those who feel a proprietary right to decide whether those negative opinions on the show are welcome. Stating the equivalent of "this place is only for people who share my opinion. You can leave a couple reviews and then go away." creates friction.

The fact is, no one has the right to decide who is welcome on MDL comments for any program and no one can dictate how many review comments someone is allowed to leave. Unless I am mistaken, this area of every MDL Title page is called "Comments", not "Positive Comments". This indicates it's a forum for all points of view, so long as they do not violate MDL's terms of service.

Likewise, MDL's official recommendation on dealing with posts that deeply upset you is to block that user. I am a great advocate of the blocking feature. If you are unable to handle dissenting opinions, if the comments here are that problematic for you, sculpt your experience here by blocking those users whose opinions are difficult for you to handle.

Thank you, Panda-san. I don't think it matters if the people posting here like the drama or not. What matters is that no one's opinion entitles them to chase others off. We are all equally welcome here.

Demigodaph Lian does give very problematical "vibes" off. You are entirely right.

I told BPG that I wasn't coming over here because I really don't prefer to waste my time. Many who refuse to see the inappropriate framing of the toxic content in the drama for what it is, aren't going to change because their refusal is grounded in the sexual gratification they receive from that very content.

But I did want to tell you that your instincts are valid. Anyone who feels that Lian's behavior is predatory, aggressive and toxic, you are correct. Your ability to threat assess is well developed and your understanding of consent and healthy relationship dynamic is well tuned, at least as it pertains to this drama.

So don't feel like it's just you. It isn't. Don't feel intimidated by those who push against unwelcome condemnation of the drama's content. Post if you feel moved to do so. Do not feel you have to refrain from sharing your honest feelings about it.

I could easily construct a thesis on Lian's behaviors in just the first four episodes. It's unfortunate that media hasn't outgrown representing destructive behavior as attractive. I can only hope this show doesn't present a resurgence in the popularity of this kind of storytelling.

That was unnecessary. You automatically lose any point you might have been trying to make by devolving your behavior in this way.

Your display has been the single least civil thing I've read here. And that's quite a bar to set.

I am very sorry thekarielle is gone. I've never spoken with them but they were a positive contributor to the comments section here and I always found their reviews quite interesting. I find it utterly unacceptable that they were subjected to harassment.

We all know that harassment of anyone is wrong. That what happened to thekarielle is wrong.

So I'm going to talk for just a moment about this comments page. I am sure everyone has noticed that the tone of the comments section for Gen Y 2 has gotten consistently worse over the last few weeks. It's because the toxic element here doesn't like the increase in support of the idea that toxic content is neither acceptable nor necessary.

Don't be fooled, this isn't about whether anyone likes the show or not.

Toxic behavior comes in many forms; aggression is just the obvious one. It's not even the most insidious. Try your best to just be that positive presence here that you want to see. And be wary of any person who doesn't want you to protect yourself on your own terms, but instead on theirs.

If you feel someone is being toxic, don't engage them. Don't argue with them. There's nothing to win. Just block them and move on. I have just blocked my first few people and I already feel the board is much less of a minefield.

Thank you. I enjoyed the research and was glad you received it well.

And well said. It's hard for any person to step outside their own social identity in order to see different people or cultures on their own terms. And it's harder yet for some people to embrace the idea that they should even try. But it's a vital component in relating to others that are different from ourselves.

In terms of what I feel the scene needed, I could have used the scene to contain Pha's family. The only thing about the scene that actually bothered me was the lack of his parents and other extended family members.

Thank you! I'm glad my post could give a different perspective for you to consider. You helped develop that point

I wouldn't worry about having not reaching the conclusion I did. There was a lot to take in and as I said, you got me part of the way there.

Besides, we approach things differently. For instance, I'm not really equipped to judge the overall quality of the scene on it's artistic merits. My wheelhouse is specifically looking at actions, statements, motivations and situations.

Your desire for an "endcap" may still be a part of you looking for some instinctual satisfaction of your expectations based on the way our culture views grief.

The funeral struck me not because it was treated in a way that was unlike the Western funerary customs we were are used to, but because Kit, Wayu and Thanu acted as if everything were perfectly normal insomuch as it can be within the scope of a funeral. We know all three of these characters to be moral people who are concerned with propriety, Kit and Wayu in particular. So automatically their behavior suggested to me that the intended audience probably understood what we Westerners would perceive as a grave breach in decorum.

But I agree on an emotional level.

I wasn't precisely sure how to organize a response to episode 10.

So I'm just going to jump in. Usually I do character analysis. And in looking at the characters' actions in episode 10, the first thing I wanted to focus on was how the mourners approached grief at the funeral and after. To me that was interesting, but not damning in any way. People grieve in so many different ways. From person to person and culture to culture.

To get context for assessing the grieving characters, I needed a Thai perspective on death. There was a bit of digging I was inspired to do, particularly after BPG's remark to someone about Thai funerals versus Western ones. Something rose to the surface. The Thai people have a different cultural outlook on bereavement than we do. Which is to be expected. But what exactly does that look like? Apparently a Thai Buddhist funeral looks like a party compared to a traditional western funeral. It can feature barbeques, music, dance, and even some gambling, and it will be spread throughout the seven days leading up to the final rites.

Now, obviously Pha was Christian and the trappings of the funeral were more austere. But Pha's mourners would have been statistically Buddhist. And Buddhists Celebrate the passage of the person's soul into its next incarnation. They carry on with as much joy in the face of their grief as they are able. Which explains a great deal of what we saw in terms of Wayu, Kit and Thanu moving forward with their lives. It may seem crass by Western standards but even though Pha was Christian, the overall cultural framework of grief for the Thai people is Buddhist in structure.

What we saw of Thanu and Wayu and Kit and Mark moving forward right after the funeral, was built into their cultural idea of grief. There were probably 5 to 7 days between his passing and his burial. During that time the shock of Pha's death could soften into the kind of acceptance that allowed them to return to their normal lives to finish resolving the hurt of their loss amid the cultural expectation of celebrating the cycle of life.

Therefore, Thanu taking Wayu's hand at the funeral and reminding him of the future they had together was actually neither out of character nor a bad thing from a Thai funerary perspective. Nor was Wayu's statement that Pha would not want to see him cry. Both of these behaviors are in accord with the culture of Thai grieving. Especially since Thanu later indicated the trip was meant to help Wayu not be so sad. It was meant to help Wayu process his grief in a joyful way.

I'm good with Thanu taking Wayu to a retreat. It makes sense, considering Wayu had talked to Pha about wanting to visit the sea. The trip may have been about helping Wayu move on, but it also had a note of fulfilling a final wish of Pha's. Which was to have Wayu get his happy trip to the ocean.

That their relationship moved forward during the trip was natural as well. There's nothing that I could find in my research of Thai mourning practices to indicate that Thanu offering the necklace and cementing his relationship with Wayu so soon after Pha's burial would have been seen as gauche. In fact, even though Pha was not Buddhist, if Thanu and Wayu were, it would have been normal for them to demonstrate to Pha's spirit that Wayu was taken care of so in their view of death, he could move on.

Same with Kit and Mark. Kit had as much to grieve as Wayu did and I've discussed my concerns for Kit in the past. Moving on in accordance with Thai conventions is healthy for him, and normal, even though he and Wayu are still in pain. Doing so by focusing on his regular patterns of contact with Mark was certainly helpful. That Kit seems so tuned into Mark and their relationship makes this stage of things feel like he's using their "trial separation" more as a stair step to wait safely on while he gathers himself to build a more permanent connection to Mark. And that's very hopeful.

And Mark's very unconditional acceptance is helping Kit in ways I didn't expect. So I'm optimistic about them.

I think that covers the mourners.

Everyone else was relatively untouched by Pha's passing and so we can just look at their behaviors under a regular lens. I think I'll take a pass on that this week. But next week I'll try to do something more comprehensive.

The only reason I posted to you at all was because I wanted to open a talk about your post. The reason I disclosed that I knew BPG a little, and it really is a little, was so that you could decide if that presented too much of a conflict of interest as we exchanged posts.

Since it does. I will withdraw.

I wish you well, and I won't bother you again. I apologize for offending you.

Kit set a requirement on Mark that they explore a role play of sorts, mimicking a physical separation that may happen in the future if Kit gets approved for a scholarship that would take him overseas to study in America.

I once posted at length on why I think he did it. You don't want to go read that long mess. To sum it up, I think Kit's not been dealing easily with Pha's illness and other challenging factors in his life. The result is that he's been participating in some relationship sabotage. But Mark's dedication to Kit is getting through. So I think he'll come around soon.

Of course this is just all me guessing. Will you be watching the last two episodes of the season?