UnaSpenser

he's still in college, too. its pretty common for children to hold the idea that they just have to get through college and then they'll start building their own life.

the key to the story was how he was refusing to accept the internalized homophobia. he wanted to know what happened to his dad, because he suspected. he needed to meet In, so that he could have a first hand experience of what the life of someone with such deeply ingrained self-loathing looks like. he can survive the three more years of college, because he has the awareness, now, of exactly what it is he's fighting and what he needs to filter out from his mother's input.

We don't know how many years in the future he is narrating from, though. I appreciated the vagueness of that. It allows the viewer to grapple with their own sense of what could or could not happen. What kind of beliefs to we hold about the possibilities for In? Do we think he'll just live out a lonely life, or will he hit some point where he can't stand it any longer and he determines he needs to allow himself to be activated? Would that take 5 years? 10 more years?

Its an interesting question for me, as I have grappled with personal repression due to a parental/family dynamic. I'm so many things that my parents couldn't grasp. (Both in respect to gender and sexuality.) But, the thing I had the hardest time allowing myself to be has nothing to do with anything like sexuality or gender identity. It had to do with my artistry as a musician. I won't go into the story. I bring it up, because In is about 40? Or in his 40s? I was in my mid 50s before I could shed the chains that had been locked onto me. I'm 59, now and just this year feeling free and comfortable. So, I can imagine In finally breaking out 15 years or so down the line. But, that's really just a self-reflection. Each viewer will have their own reflection. If they are younger, they may not have a sense of it. If they are older, it may depend on what they have managed to overcome or to witness other overcome.

I loved the sort of vagueposting of that bit of the narration; leaving each viewer with themselves and their own world views.

This is exactly what I got from it. A look at how homophobia - with its repression and forcing people to be "normal" - wreaks permanent and multi-generational damage.

Its a political statement and the intention is to, hopefully, give some people a jolt of compassion such that they might reconsider how they've been holding things and what needs to happen in the socio-political sphere to spare people this kind of trauma and grief.

tldr; exquisitely heartbreaking

"what did she do?" ugh. though, I felt that it was a bit realistic to have him need to empathize with his mother, since In rejected him and he needed someone to love him, and, well, she's his mother, it was the most flawed piece of his analysis of everything.

She did plenty. She manipulated people. She refused to accept their own definition of their sexuality. She was utterly cruel to In, from beginning to end. I don't know why he wanted her approval. She used him, ripped the one he loved away from him - knowing that he was not strong enough to stand up for himself and Siam, and that she could get him to push Siam away. She only ever cared about her own feelings and her own life view and no matter how much she hurt other people, she would insist on her way or the highway. Literally pushed a man to his death and was willing to push her son there, too. The entire story of all of their lives would be completely different if it weren't for her. Maybe In never would have had the courage to be open about his sexuality, but it didn't all have to be so ugly. She probably made Siam feel the same way she did In; telling him that he disgusts her. Driving her loathing into him and generating self-loathing.

I don't understand how Wang could see that In's passivity caused a lot of pain, but couldn't see that Mol's active homophobia and narcissism also cause a lot of pain. Why should she be placated at the expense of everyone else? Why can't anyone else be genuine to themselves? Why is that "for her sake"? Its just gross. Oppressive parents, using their emotional and financial power to demand that their children repress their genuine selves, to damage that is pretty much impossible to fully heal from.

She did plenty. She was the one who really did not deserve to get what she wanted.

I knew it would end like this. They did such a good job of keeping you so emotionally engaged every single minute. Longing so hard for it to go differently than we knew it would. Drained from the painful ending, even as it was predictable. Great writing. Great acting. Great direction. (It felt like a play, where we had intimate seats right up on the stage.) Oof, though. It hits hard.

That’s such a painful story! And, yes, domineering and abusive parents can have multi-generational impacts.

With only one episode to go, I don’t see how there is any option other than heartache for Wang.

I AM wondering if there is still a big reveal around what happened the day Siam died. Maybe he learned that Wang is not his biological son. I can’t think of what else would have spurred a dramatic turn of events. The marriage had already fallen apart. They were already divorced. So, what could have been said between them that triggered the tragedy?

How is that an ending?

And why wasn’t there more depth to the friendship of the 2 MLS? We didn’t get enough sense of them as bonded to feel much when they did the fake out, in the end.

I didn’t end up emotionally involved with any of the characters. It may be the first cliffhanger-ish ending where I don’t care enough to clamor for a second season. Maybe if they promised it would be more focused in the 2 men. And, if we got any sense of emotion from Situ. What is his personal history and what drives him? We learned about other characters, but not him. His character was so dry.

True that they all have a responsibility. The difference is that, societally speaking, Mol is in the power position. She could use the power of the social norm to drive things the way she wanted. It does seem like she knew perfectly well that Siam and In were close, very close. She reads people well. She's a narcissist and she knows how to get what she wants or play the victim card, if she doesn't. So, she tapped into In's fearful and passive personality and used him to get close to Siam. Siam probably felt devastated that In would take the role of matchmaker. And, given how brutally anti-homosexual Thailand has been, he could have just fallen into a deep depression and ended up going along to get along; abandoning himself, because he felt abandoned by the one he trusted the most.

In and Siam's choices come from a very different place than Mol. She just wanted what she wanted. She could have chosen to target any man. She latched on and wasn't going to let go, no matter who it hurt. In and Siam were conditioned to think there was something "wrong" with them and they had to be "normal." They made their choices out of a great deal of fear and culturally generated self-loathing.

So, yes, they were all consenting adults. They all bear responsibility. The psycho-emotional load they had to carry was very different.

If you are partnered and realize that your partner does not love you - whether that is a matter of sexuality or not; you let them go, because life together will be miserable. If you claim that you love them, you wouldn't want to put them through that misery. If you love yourself, you wouldn't want to put yourself through it. And you don't pretend that things are different than they are. Yes, she may have been hurt, but she's been lying to her son about his father. She's been making the matter of his sexuality about her not being lovable. She wallows in the victimhood of having an "unloving" husband. Just as she's making Wang's love confession be about not loving her. What parent says, "am I not enough?" when their child falls in love? As a parent, you were never supposed to be the only one they love. They were always going to grow and find love elsewhere. Its absurd. Would she have said that if he fell in love with a woman? Probably not. Its a homophobic, narcissistic ploy. Her consistently narcissistic behaviors are why she's so lonely. She doesn't connect to people for an exchange. She just extracts. Everything is about her and whether the other person is meeting her demands.

That said, In would drive me up a wall. I don't understand why Wang would fall in love with such fear-driven, passive person. I'd be like, "you're nice enough, but call me when you're ready to live for yourself."

I have the same thoughts as you. I don't see how this ends well for Wang.

Mol is the quintessential pro-active narcissist. In is the quintessential passive empathizer. He was already traumatized by what she put him through with Siam. When he's around her, you sense his PTSD. Since he ran away and hid in his hermitage, he hasn't actually done any of the healing that would give him the strength to stand up to her.

Plus, we don't know that he is in love with Wang. Or that he was romantically in love with Siam. He never actually says anything.

So, I don't see how any of this ends up happy for Wang. Both people abandoned him at the table, when he wanted to be acknowledged. (Mirroring what they did to Siam.) Mol or In or both are going to reject him, whichever way this goes. He's going to be devastated.

She's a classic narcissist. She's lonely because she doesn't actually relate to anyone else, as in empathize with anyone else's emotions and ways of seeing things. So, people keep a distance and she is alone, with the only one left to control being her son. May he find his way out of her grip.

She's a classic narcissist

I have the same critique. Plus, the FL voice grates on me. It’s hard to take her seriously with that breathy baby voice and the way she drops the ends of all her syllables. Her voice has no power. I don’t even speak Mandarin and I can tell she doesn’t have good diction. Surely, a vocal coach could help her fix this. She’s a pretty decent actress, aside from this.

Also, thought the story was about a revenge scenario, where the lead has to learn that he’s seeking revenge against the wrong person. It strays way of that plot for way too long.

Agreed. Japan seems to have an inordinate amount of these.

It’s confusing. With their use of “brother”, it makes it seem that her dad is his uncle, making them cousins. They are from the same clan, but I guess it’s a little more distant?

I’m very late getting to this. In episode 11, right now. Wondering if the Xun’er character is going to develop, well, any character? It feels like bad casting and bad writing.

She’s supposed to be one of the strongest fighters in her class. But the actress doesn’t exude any sense of power. Her fist pumps in the air have no strength to them. She moves like a timid child. Why did they cast her for this? Surely they can find actresses who can look like they can fight.

When they’re battling their first beast, she apparently doesn’t know to get out of its path and can’t run on her own. So, in the midst of this supposedly very dangerous fight, the ML has to grab her hand and drag her. You don’t go on dangerous hunts with people who need literal hand holding.

She’s pouty and teary all the time. They wrote almost no dialogue for her and what little they gave her doesn’t make sense. “I have faith in you” [while crying and begging him not to the thing he is committed to and that she says she has faith him in for.]

I hope there is more to her story than just being pretty and an emotional support for the ML. /rant

Otherwise, it’s a fun story, with some of the usual weaknesses if wuxia, while still being enjoyable.

I don’t think she did. He left his job, as much for his own sake, as for her, in my understanding. Seeing the ugliest side of it, he didn’t want to participate any longer. Also, his drive for fighting injustice was really rekindled by her presence and he was willing to do things which would not serve a political career. So, he opted out. But, there was never any indication that she was going to accept a romance.

oh, nvm. I see the rest are "express."

I'm confused about episode numbers, I think. On Tencent/WeTV, there are only 48?

the assemblyman deserved a better relationship than anyone could ever have with her. though, I agree that they had more chemistry, I didn't wish her upon him. She was one lost soul, preyed upon by the corporate goons and then used by the woman who took her in. All her relations were fabrications. She didn't know how to truly relate.

Its the 21st century. They didn't email, text, connect on social media at all? When they work in a field of digital arts?

And they had already confirmed their interest in one another before he left, so why can't they just connect and talk? A simple text when he arrived, "I'm back and I can't wait to see you!" would have been so easy.

I have absolutely adored the Japanese BLs, but this one has weak writing and the story is losing me. (I already didn't like the whole thing with the Canadian guy bashing him the way he did and claiming that one year with him would change his career. Such BS. But, here we are.... I guess I'll finish since I've come this far, but I'm disappointed.