the plot wasn't very interesting but the sets/costumes/acting were awesome, and the depiction of marital abuse as well. he xuanlin (female lead) was jaw-dropping. but people should be aware going in that this show includes psychological and physical torture as well as rape (mostly off-screen, but you see the start of each instance of sexual assault). some very nasty anti-abortion arguments as well. expected considering the setting but still potentially harmful.
Though ML is somehow obsessed and crazy, but ML is true to his feeling and resolution. This tragedy happened because…
my friend he sequesters her, gets a doctor to damage her body, and rapes her, i don't think communication is the problem here or that she "refuses to think clearly"
it's very irritating every time this kind of plot happens where the ML harasses, assaults, even tortures the FL and then acts all wounded and betrayed when she "betrays" him, with a whole ass episode dedicated to making her feel guilty lol. if he didn't want her to try to kill him he shouldn't have abused her.
Thank you for saying this. The blame toward people who attempt/commit suicide is useless and hurtful. People die…
Yeah, I dare, and I'm right to. If saying the harsh truth that people blaming victims of suicide for dying are heartless makes me an animal, then so be it. Depression is an illness that kills people indiscriminately. Institutionalization and the treatments therein are no less gruelling and dehumanizing than chemotherapy. ECT, chemical camisoles, medical abuse, contribute to destroying you physically and mentally. The slow agony that leads you to suicide can be compared with dying of cancer. Add to it the anger and blame directed toward you for harming yourself and you find yourself with no one to turn to and no outlet but the thought of not feeling anything anymore in order to relieve your pain. I am not insensitive for understanding this and refusing to blame suicidal people. Suicide prevention starts with understanding and material, tangible, help, not with blame and contempt. People always act shocked and furious when I make this comparison, and all that tells me is that they do not see depression as a genuine illness. This is the last I'll say about this; this animal will leave you to stew in your misplaced anger while it continues its work in suicide prevention.
Thank you for saying this. The blame toward people who attempt/commit suicide is useless and hurtful. People die…
And people with depression aren't fighting? How long does it take, how much pain does it take for someone to go for suicide? You can't know how long they've fought to live. And whether they fought at all doesn't matter either. No one just defaults to suicide. Suicide isn't an easy decision, and it's certainly not an "easy way out". It is understandable for someone in this amount of pain to be desperate enough to want to die. I am not normalizing anything by showing understanding and compassion. The problem doesn't lie in people themselves attempting, it lies in what pushed them into attempting in the first place—poverty, loneliness, unemployment, homelessness, ostracization, oppression, abuse, grief. Only by helping them fix their problems can we help them recover. Recognizing the pain of suicidal people and showing respect toward their struggles, instead of shoving blame onto them, is much more humane and helpful than tagging them as culpable. This doesn't equate normalization or justification or "encouraging" people to attempt; it means trying to understand them in order to take active measures to help them. I will never blame someone for being in too much pain to continue living, no matter how grieved I am. I will blame the hardships that led them to death.
Thank you for saying this. The blame toward people who attempt/commit suicide is useless and hurtful. People die…
My depression is very much treated, with 9 years of antidepressants and therapy, and with over one year in total spent in 4 psychiatric institutions. This has not stopped me (or others!) from attempting suicide three times in those 9 years. Untreated anything can be terminal, and treated anything can also be terminal. My point is that accusing people who die of suicide of being murderers or of hurting their loved ones purposefully is just as nonsensical and insensitive as accusing victims of cancer of those things. You can be grieved and hurt without accusing the one who died of viciously hurting you. Depression is an illness that kills roughly 800,000 people per year. None of these people deserve contempt or blame for being ill to the point of lethal despair. This actress is also blameless.
There's a comment that says committing is selfish; ignore that. I've seen too much and know too much. Sometimes…
Thank you for saying this. The blame toward people who attempt/commit suicide is useless and hurtful. People die of suicide the same way they might die of other terminal illnesses—depression can be a terminal illness, and suicide is how people die of it. There is no use in playing the blaming game over it. Suicide isn't any more selfish than dying of cancer. I have received blame and anger for each of my attempts, and I can testify to how damaging it is, whether the attempt is serious or meant as a call for help. I hope she rests in peace, and I hope she never receives blame for dying of her illness.
The character acts exactly like my nephew with Asperger's syndrome. I find the character very well written.
I guess enjoy eating crumbs from the hands of the usual people who think autism is valid as long as you have an IQ of 200 and eidetic memory. You failed to understand a single thing i said so let's leave it at that
The character acts exactly like my nephew with Asperger's syndrome. I find the character very well written.
I didn't dismiss any of it... I said nothing about ratings at all, and i said many autistic people probably do recognize themselves here. Please don't put words in my mouth. I've been very kindly insisting on the fact that this is what I think personally. I think this drama means well but i find it cheap and disingenuous. To me, this is bad writing.
The character acts exactly like my nephew with Asperger's syndrome. I find the character very well written.
I don't doubt that they researched how kids with Asperger's act and I don't doubt the good intentions of the cast and staff. My issue is that when I look at autistic characters like this, I am completely unable to relate in any way, despite being autistic myself. In fact I feel deeply uncomfortable. This character represents the general "positive" understanding of what autism is: something inherently child-like, always associated with high intelligence, stripped of personality. It shows cute/acceptable mannerisms, easily-understood signs of distress that other characters and the viewers can sympathize with naturally... All "positive" depictions of autistic characters end up building the exact same character that to me, an autistic adult, looks entirely alien.
All this to say, it's not enough (at least to me) that a character "act like someone with autism" by showing the common mannerisms and symptoms. This drama is meant for the non-autistic eye and serves to comfort non-autistic people in their shallow understanding of autism, rather than to challenge them. It doesn't mean that real autistic people don't act like this character does, plenty do, but even for those who do, building the same autistic canon in fiction over and over isn't a helpful thing. It's fine to enjoy the show. I just find it very uncomfortable personally and those are the reasons why.
I have received blame and anger for each of my attempts, and I can testify to how damaging it is, whether the attempt is serious or meant as a call for help.
I hope she rests in peace, and I hope she never receives blame for dying of her illness.
All this to say, it's not enough (at least to me) that a character "act like someone with autism" by showing the common mannerisms and symptoms. This drama is meant for the non-autistic eye and serves to comfort non-autistic people in their shallow understanding of autism, rather than to challenge them. It doesn't mean that real autistic people don't act like this character does, plenty do, but even for those who do, building the same autistic canon in fiction over and over isn't a helpful thing. It's fine to enjoy the show. I just find it very uncomfortable personally and those are the reasons why.