Greyjohncaster

I rarely feel not because i cannot feel but rather because i am scared to.
Why did i want you to be better, why did i want you to be good, why was i then hurt when you werent, when it was never my purpose for you to be, why did i strive to control thee so you could be what I wanted you to be,
why did i desire for you, why did i long for you , Why did my heart race at the sight of you, why did i want a stranger, why did i desire someone just because i saw them on a screen, why did i find you pretty, oh Whyy was i so keen,
why did i like celebrities why did i like someone just because i saw them on a screen and i thought they were pretty, Where they pretty, when underneath all that oil they look like me?
Did i really love me, the way i was supposed to be, and if i did why did i idolize thee?
This is what i felt the first time i felt i started to see