Mila

Imperfect but gripping.

So I just finished it. And I'm still kind of confused about what I feel exactly. There are a lot of things I disliked about this drama but a lot of things I loved as well. The sometimes convenient writing, some overdone tropes and plot holes are among the things I dislike. But the characters, relationships, OST, general story, lessons are those I like and are always what matter most to me in any work of fiction.

The first few episodes were pretty boring and frustrating to me but maybe because I wasn't in the right state of mind to watch then. When Geon Oh arrived is basically the moment I didn't want to stop watching anymore. Even when I wasn't convinced by the writing, I wanted to know. Things were starting to seriously move at this point and make me realize that the intense and complex personalities and relationships of all these characters made up for the sometimes sloppy writing - for me at least. Some twists I didn't except. Some were common, boring tropes. Some were common but interestingly done. Then the ending felt a bit rushed, especially episode 16. And the twist was... seriously absurd and badly written imo, with no explanation whatsoever. Really weird. So that was disappointing. There are also a lot of loose ends. But - what really mattered was resolved. And I think that's what makes its ending satisfying despite its many flaws.

I also absolutely loved the subtle friendship between the two male leads that slowly builds upon trust and suffering. Sang Cheol's character could have been deepened but he was a good guy anyway, loyal and honest from start to end and beyond.

Special mention for Sang Min, the father of Bo Young, that in all his imperfection and sins is actually a very powerful and interesting character.

Overall it's an extremely tragic, sad, bitter, sick but powerful story with fascinating characters, interesting relationships and a relatively satisfying ending despite a lot of unfinished businesses and sometimes too much plot convenience.

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When love saves.

While I have never actually written a review for this 2018 work of art that was My Mister, it nonetheless changed my way of envisioning dramas and raised my expectations tenfold for every subsequent one after I discovered it a few years ago. If you haven't watched it, I will somewhat spoil it here. Although there isn't much to spoil, really. If you want to entirely discover it yourself, I will add a spoiler alert at the paragraph concerned by the spoiler regardless. Other than a review, it's more like a spontaneous rant meant to alleviate the feelings I'm feelings in the feels right now suddenly remembering it for some reason.

Until this show, never have I been this close to seeing my own perspective about love materialized on screen. It was at arm's length when I went through the anime Naruto, many years prior. Exemplary tale of pure, unconditional, sacrificial love. An everlasting brotherhood, an unbreakable friendship, a beautiful growth, sadly mistaken by many as a basic boring power of friendship shōnen that just went on for way too long. While it was far from a perfect score, if I remove all the filler and nonsense and inappropriate stuff, it's still today one of the most beautiful stories I've ever watched.

Except from this, I thought that outside of Christian or deep Buddhist contexts it simply wasn't possible to encounter stories of very profound spiritual and platonic love, unending forgiveness and redemption in the face of any fault, and impeccable uprightness without mixing in a lot of romance and passions to make it palatable to conventional audiences. My Mister proved me half-wrong, as it is still very much anchored in Buddhist philosophy and it has its fair share of romance, but at the same time it doesn't matter that much. It then opened the door for me to discover many other beautiful tales of love that are out of this world. Asian dramas simply have a way of doing that. Their romances are beautiful - their non-romances are exceptional. However, this far, nothing quite hit me as deep as My Mister did.

Therefore right now, I just want to talk about it. In particular, about this magical relationship between Park Dong Hun (marvellously interpreted by Lee Sun Kyun, who tragically took his life in 2023, December 27th, following false accusations) and Lee Ji An (made alive by Lee Ji Eun with all her heart, also known as IU).

Some people consider this a star-crossed lovers story, where neither time, nor space, nor circumstances were right for them to come together romantically but where they nonetheless wished they could. I see it as an entirely platonic bond devoid of wordly desires that transcends time, space and circumstances without burdening itself with any labels. While this isn't just about them but also about many other miserable people around them, all unhappy, flawed and relatable in their own pathetic ways, what I will never forget is these two characters whose pitiful lives got intertwined and could never again be separated.

I genuinely believe there is no ambiguity about the nature of their relationship in this drama. Even if they had tried to make it ambiguously romantic, it simply doesn't work for me. This is just not the kind of energy and dynamic that is going on between them, at all. Dong Hun on his side made it crystal clear from the start : she could be his own daughter (age gap of +15 years !) and in no way did he think of her like that. He is as close to perfection as could be a faithful, principled and selfless human being, and he never gave any indication that this kind of relationship with her was something he actually desired, at any point. Added to that, Dong Hun was married, and divorce or cheating simply weren't in his vocabulary.



[SPOILER ALERT]

He even forgave his wife with all the meagre strength he had left for her unfaithfulness and remained loyal to her to the end of the drama - and, I believe, to the end of their fictional lives.

While Ji An did 'kiss' Dong Hun once, it is very clear that this was out of her desperate, malicious, confused aim to create a scandal and provoke him, trying to shake off of him what she thought was merely a fake facade of integrity. As inappropriate as it was, and as distressed as that made Dong Hun, it simply made sense for where she was on her growth arc at this point. Then not only did he reject her firmly, she also ended up hurting herself instead of him as others saw right through it, and in no other instances did she appear to love him in a way that was sexual. She loved him, there is no doubt. But I sincerely believe it was not a physical love.

[END SPOILER]



In fact, this story could not be further from being about a passionate, forbidden, secret 'love' affair between a mentally-ill girl and a middle-aged man on the edge of a complete breakdown. It's about true and unconditional love that doesn't care about anything but what is right and just, forgiveness that remains even when everyone else would condemn, hope in absolute darkness, sacrifice without asking anything in return and unfailing virtue, that healed and transformed two people whose hearts had been ravaged by life, and whose lives were completely falling apart.

To go even further, from how I see it, Lee Ji An could have been a child, a senior lady, a man, a pony or an alien life form from another dimension, it wouldn't have changed anything or made inappropriate the love they had (minus what I talked about in the spoiler section, obviously). It is the purest, the strongest and the best rendition of true unconditional platonic love I have seen in any fiction this far, and haven't come near this again. Except for some good bro-sismances, but not between a male and a female, and certainly not to this extent.

Apart from this, watching this show feels like taking a deep dive into psychology and Buddhist philosophy. The amount of pertinent life quotes these beaten-down guys say, that make you feel both exposed and healed is something that really attracted me. Yet, this is also one of the reasons I cannot rewatch it. I have rewatched it multiple times already. But that was before Lee Sun Kyun passed away. This a psychologically and emotionally very difficult story to endure, as rewarding as it is in the end. It's heavy. It's depressing. Many of these people are walking corpses. Their last resort to survive is either make-believe and cynicism or ridiculous attempts at grasping some air with one nostril while they're themselves blocking the other one and the entire ocean is filling up their lungs through their mouth. It's not like they're going through extreme, abnormal trauma. It's just... life. And it's already so hard. It's not a tale culminating in well-earned success, perfect health, eternal happiness, wrongs made rights ; it's a realistic yet satisfying and spiritually uplifting one. Now that it's said, the fact this great actor and good man is gone only leaves us a painfully bittersweet memory. It truly makes journeying with his character that much more gutting. Which is why I don't feel ready to rewatch it. However - if you haven't yet watched this and are considering it because the themes appeal to you - please, please, please : do. Really. You will cry. You will be angry. Your heart will rise, and then it will fall flat. It will swell, then it will be crushed. But in the end, it will all be worth it.

I hope that anyone coming across this drama will remember it, carve it in their heart, feel it in their soul. If only Lee Sun Kyun had done so.

"So just watch. Watch and see just how happy I live my life. None of this is a big deal. Being humiliated ? People gossiping about how my life is ruined ? None of that is a big deal. I can live a happy life. I won't be broken. I will be happy." - Park Dong Hun to Lee Ji An.

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A criminally underrated treasure.

I do understand the low rating for this drama and at the same time I really don't. The themes are extremely dark and everything is pretty gloomy and unpretentious. If you prefer light-hearted subjects, or breathtaking cinematography, or extremely tight logic with a masterfully written whodunit, this is not going to satisfy you. This is not what it is. Also, the premise is on its own hard to believe. Some suspension of disbelief is needed. However, if you can do that, the writing in general is in my opinion gripping even though some tropes aren't that surprising. The pacing is more contemplative than it is active. But unless you're an action junkie or very impatient or you simply don't care about these characters at all, it's short enough to finish it pretty quickly without getting bored.

There is another complaint about this drama that I don't get, is trying to level it to The Bad Kids. As much as I love that drama, I don't see the point in comparing the two. Of course on a technical level The Bad Kids is probably superior. Does it mean it's necessarily better ? It does not.

This show is powerful on many levels and doesn't need to be ashamed of its identity. I will not say much because I don't want to spoil anything. But it deals with heavy topics, shows us a glimpse of a very broken humanity and what it can do, sometimes, supposedly, out of love, and is overall extremely sad. Basically every time you learn something new this becomes more and more tragic.

Yet there is hope in the same broken love that some of these characters show for each other. Imperfect, sometimes messed up love, it still is basically the core of everything. It is heartbreaking. It's also very human.

The acting is spectacular from most of the cast, the relationships between these characters are fascinating and complicated and the OST is an absolute gem - these three songs are among the most beautiful I've heard and they really suit this show. One of them is sung by the two MLs' actors and becomes the ending song for the second half or so of the drama. It's such a sweet and soothing song, well needed after the emotions this story can make you feel.

If you're interested in thrillers, child trafficking, dysfunctional families, parents/children relationships, and love in general, please give this drama a chance.

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Sometimes it is.

I usually do not leave a review for dramas I drop because I think it's a bit unfair. I also rarely drop and usually keep watching even when it's pretty bad because I always hope there will be something better or that it'll make sense in the end. But this drama is 37 episodes, OK ? 37 episodes of 40 minutes with barely anything I appreciate in it is a bit too much to subject myself to. As much as I love watching Wang Zi Wen. So when I reached the end of episode 7 thinking "gosh still 30 left to go", I figured it was time to give up.

As context, I started it for two things ONLY : Wang Zi Wen, and the promising unusual friendship between her character, Jiang Tian, and Wu Jing Fang. After seeing her rendition of Ye Wen Jie in "Three Body", I just needed to see more of her works, especially in a lighter role. And these kinds of unexpected platonic bonds are my fuel and my passion.

I do not like romance however I wouldn't have minded a little if this was good (according to my subjective preferences). Not only is there a lot here (romance should be one of the genres, I don't know why it's not) but it's not very well written and the "first love rekindling after 10 years" trope, especially with the guy still liking her after so long, is a nope for me.

BUT even with that I was perfectly ready to keep watching. For her great acting, Ms. Wu, their relationship and the rest of the story. But you see, Jiang Tian is actually extremely unpleasant. Sure, she probably has to go through a positive arc and I do admit she has potential. She's cute when she's nice and her personality is interesting.

BUT after 7 episodes I could still barely connect with any of the characters. I hated her workplace and all her dumbass colleagues. Mr. Qian is a freaking prick and yet everyone is expected to lick his boots like he's some kind of Messiah. Is that even possible in a normal company ? I was looking forward to her working on her own, sure, but for that I would need to continue watching. Which is not gonna happen. Also her best friend wanting to push her towards her ex constantly while she was still with her boyfriend (basically encouraging her to cheat or to tempt her to ?) for 5 episodes was so incredibly annoying that I started to dislike seeing her despite their relationship being absolutely adorable and having so much potential.

BUT the final move for me was the "unfaithfulness" of her boyfriend. It was so forced and stupid. The way she found out is terribly convenient ("oh sure, take my phone full of unfaithful conversations with another girl, you know the password"). And honestly none of what he said was false - Tian can be very domineering and unlikable. Telling her that she's all good and he's the villain isn't going to change anything. That woman he chatted with could have been his best friend (if they didn't talk romantically like they seemed to do with each other though...) and if that was the case, I don't see how it would have been wrong in any way. But Tian didn't even try to listen or consider what he had to say. And even with that, maybe he truly wanted to make things better between them. Not trying to excuse cheating in any manner and not saying that his relationship with the other girl wasn't at risk of becoming physical, because it seemed like it was. But this whole plot point was an absurd excuse to push her back with the other guy. She shouldn't have had a boyfriend to begin with if it was to insert this ridiculous arc that dragged for way too long. Alternatively, he should have just broken up with her directly from the start of the show to push forward her character's growth and give an additional justification to her coming back to her hometown, without this silly cheating thing.

That's really too bad. I really wanted to witness the growing affection between Tian and Jing Fang and their developing career and life. The acting is very good and I'm sure there are a lot of great things in the following episodes. But I cannot go through this. Especially if these 7 episodes accurately reflect the 30 remaining ones. It was supposed to be a comfort drama but it ended up becoming a stressful, unnerving one. Maybe I'll give it another try later, skipping every annoying scenes just to watch what I'm interested into. But not right now.

I'd rather keep watching what I enjoy. Life is difficult and short enough.

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