Love in the Big City (2024)

Yeong's worst enemy....

This series had me until episode 6 and then it just was a dull hum until the end. It's was a beautiful realistic story. One of the greatest joys was watching Yeong move from being self indulgent over exhuberent college kid to a self aware realist, a published writer. This is also the greatest sadness. He drew on his experiences, his environment and poured it into his writing. Along the way he lost his sparkle.

Gyu Ho and Nam Gyu both suffered the same fate. Yeong's inability to accept love without expectations caused him to lose two people who truly love him. It seems all his relationships were doomed due to his desire to have the razzle dazzle fireworks to continue throughout, without being able to accept the mundane. Only after they were over, would he be able to see what he truly lost and regretted. Not knowing his true self and his inability to be alone encouraged two relationships that should never have been. Habibi and Yeong Su came with hidden baggage, one abusive and the other just sad. Yeong Su lived in shadows and manipulated Yeong's niaivete to live in his internalized homophobia. Habibi, with a hidden wife and child, embarks on a journey with him, hoping to capture a bit of Yeong's sparkle to relieve his boredom. Seeing him too drunk and overworked, Yeong chooses himself and walks away. Both relationships were poor choices to facing a life of solitude and expected failures.

His mother is shown to have moved from denial, abhorring, to knowing, to minimally discussing. She doesn't accept his life but still loves her son.

The real charmers, the electricity powering his life, were his close group of friends and roomate Mi Ae. Yet, even with them, some bits of his life were closed. His HIV status is only shown to be discussed with Gyu Ho, who loved him enough to truly accept him as he is. Gyu Ho, after the cowardly way Yeong breaks up with him, never contacts him again. Though, through the bartender at their favorite spot, he let's Yeong know, he is still loved. Not yet ready to make any contact, in the end, it is his friends that he is seen enjoying the fireworks.

The story was beautifully told, and with flashbacks in the last two episodes, we get a fuller history of the reality of his best relationship, Gyu Ho. The sad part for me is that he began to let his status have an effect on him and as he took stock of his life, became more subdued. The last two episode felt like a gradual slide down from the high.

Every character was skillfully brought to life. Yeong was a free spirited over the top whitty self accepting non judgemental dreamer who was scared to dream and Nam Yoon Su killed it. This is a must see at least once.

Note to directors and editors at large:
Flashbacks: This is how it's supposed to be done. Ever flashback should reveal something new and actually propel the story being told.

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An okay drama that could've been better

My first impression of "Love in the Big City" wasn't entirely favorable (the drama was too depressing for me to handle); however, I was impressed by the cast's performances. One standout was Nam Yoon Su. He took a courageous stand against the homophobic attitudes that plague society by playing a non-straight role and partaking in same-sex intimacy without any reservation. Each kiss, each moment of physical closeness, was an act of trust, a man's willingness to open himself up to another man. The directors' attention to detail and depth was evident in every frame, and it was impossible not to be moved by the beauty of it

Yoon Su deserves the utmost praise for bringing warmth and sincerity to his scenes. He held nothing back, conveying raw passion and vulnerability in equal measure. His performance left a lasting impression on me, one that was haunting and memorable

Having paid due attention to the positives, I'll analyze the elements that require improvement, as "Love in the Big City," even with its noble efforts to redefine "queer" storytelling, remains short of fulfilling its promise. Among its flaws, none are as detestable as the violation of a gay male space (a gay club) by a "straight" identifying woman (31:07 of episode 1). The sanctity of a gay male space is not to be disturbed, it's a space for men of like mind and heart to be unabashed in their same-sex desires, away from the harsh gaze of the heteronormative society. Entering a single-sex space with the intention of pursuing someone of the opposite sex to carry back to one’s bed reveals a lack of understanding of, and respect for, the space's true purpose

What was that sudden, unceremonious reference to HIV? HIV isn't a gay disease and a character's (homo)sexuality doesn't warrant the inclusion of HIV in a storyline. The doctor's assumption that the main character's HIV was sexually transmitted is inconsistent with his assertion that the chances of transmitting HIV through sex are low (39:50 of episode 5). The main character's life was unaffected by the disease, and there was no reason why he should be among the rare cases of sexual transmission. HIV is being used for dramatic effect

The narrative device of "straight" identifying female characters befriending gay male characters and becoming the medium through which gay stories are told is tiresome and troubling. Why a "straight" identifying woman, and not a gay woman, a fellow member of the community who shares the same struggles and experiences of discrimination? Can't a gay woman and a gay man get along and be depicted as friends for once?

The conclusion of the story was an anticlimactic question mark, tinged with the bitterness of an uncertain future. Sad or open endings are a trademark of most "queer" stories, and their writers seem to have a vendetta against gay happiness. Time and again, the main character experienced the crushing revelation that the men he believed to be his perfect match were either prejudiced against his (homo)sexuality or not a good fit. It pained me to see him isolated and dejected. I find greater comfort in happy BLs/gay stories that celebrate the joy of the romantic fulfillment and validation denied to gay couples. They surpass their sad or open-ended "queer" counterparts

The depiction of a gay person's life prevents me from rating "Love in the Big City" too low. I've decided on a score of 8 that acknowledges the value and the flaws of the story

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