Kill to Love

A Must watch Wuxia BL !! !

Kill to Love completely exceeded my expectations. At first glance, it looks like just another historical drama with palaces, politics, and power struggles—but it’s so much more than that. What really struck me was how beautifully the story balanced romance with destiny.

The relationship between Duan Ziang and Xiao Shuhe isn’t just about attraction—it’s about loyalty, sacrifice, and the painful choices they’re forced to make for love and country. Their chemistry feels so natural and heartfelt that even the smallest looks or gestures carry weight. The tension, the yearning, the heartbreak—it all kept me glued to the screen.

One of the biggest surprises for me is that this is actually a real BL wuxia drama. Most Chinese BLs are forced into “bromance” territory because of censorship, so we never really get to see queer love portrayed openly in this genre. That’s why Kill to Love feels so refreshing and exciting—it’s breaking the mold and giving us something fans have been waiting for.

Another highlight is the acting. Even though the cast is quite young, they all delivered far beyond expectations—especially the two leads. They brought depth, emotion, and incredible chemistry to their roles. Their performances made the love story believable and moving. Combined with the beautiful costumes and impressive production design, the whole drama feels visually rich and emotionally captivating.

The pacing is another strength. I have watched the first 8 episodes released till now and the best part was, there are no unnecessary fillers—every moment pushes the story forward. From assassin to emperor, from overlooked prince to sovereign, the character growth is powerful and emotional.

》Why you should watch: If you love epic romances where love is tested by fate, betrayal, and kingdoms at war, this one will definitely touch your heart. It’s intense, tragic at times, but ultimately unforgettable.

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The ending didn't earn my tears.

I finished Kill to Love feeling more angry than devastated, and that honestly surprised me. I didn’t hate the ending because it was tragic. I expected tragedy. What frustrated me was how Shu He got there, and how the show asks us to accept his final choice without really earning it.

Early Shu He is defined by a love of art and music, a clear emotional intelligence, a distance from court politics, and most importantly his ability to truly see Zi Ang as a human being rather than a weapon or a tool. That’s the foundation of their relationship, even if they initially approached each other with their own agendas (which didn’t last long once they fell hard for one another). Shu He’s empathy and moral awareness are not subtle traits since the show emphasizes them again and again.

That’s why his later character shift feels so jarring.

Before the Crown Prince’s rebellion, the series goes out of its way to show that Shu He is not blindly loyal to his brother. He is openly disappointed in the way his brother rules. He sees the corruption, questions his methods, and even directly opposes him at court instead of quietly appeasing him. This matters, because it establishes Shu He as someone capable of moral judgment and resistance, not just a passive bystander ruled by filial piety alone.

And yet, after the rebellion, that entire foundation seems to vanish.

This is the same brother who destroyed Shu He’s hand, stripping him of his music and identity. The same brother who murdered their father and openly stated he would kill Shu He as well. Despite all of this, Shu He never truly reckons with who his brother became. Instead of grappling with the truth - that the Crown Prince was already lost, that power had corrupted him beyond repair - Shu He emotionally freezes and redirects his grief outward. Rather than being conflicted between familial duty and forbidden love, he chooses to idealize his dead family and blame Zi Ang for everything that went wrong.

That’s where the writing loses me.

The show also tells us very clearly that Zi Ang only invades Shu He's kingdom as an absolute last resort. Shu He’s rule is so weak that nobles and citizens are already on the brink of rebellion, and the kingdom falls quickly precisely because the people are discontented. The invasion isn’t the cause of the collapse but the consequence of a kingdom already rotting from within, which makes Shu He’s supposed devotion to his people ring hollow.

Rather than taking agency as a ruler, acknowledging the rot in the court, his own inaction, or asking why his people abandoned him so easily, Shu He becomes fixated on Zi Ang as the singular cause of his suffering. It feels less like tragedy and more like avoidance. Zi Ang becomes a convenient vessel for guilt, allowing Shu He to preserve an image of moral righteousness without confronting the reality that his ideals were not enough to govern.

This ties directly into my biggest issue: the deception at the end.

Shu He doesn’t just choose his kingdom over Zi Ang, he actively takes from Zi Ang the one and only thing he still had: him. By hiding his intention to die, Shu He robs Zi Ang of agency, honesty, and even the chance to grieve properly. The show frames this as a noble sacrifice, an act of justice, or even a final expression of love. But from my perspective, it felt cruel. Love without honesty isn’t devotion, it’s control dressed up as righteousness.

What makes this even harder to accept is how the series consistently portrays Zi Ang’s love as self-sacrificial to a fault. He gives up everything: his identity, his morality, his power, all in service of protecting Shu He. For Shu He to then decide, alone, that his own death is the final “justice” Zi Ang deserves creates a deeply unbalanced dynamic. If this was meant to be tragic love, it crossed into emotional punishment instead, and that left a bitter taste.

I’m aware that the source material might explain or justify Shu He’s mindset more clearly, but the show has to stand on its own. As a viewer, I needed more internal struggle, more accountability, more visible reckoning. Instead, Shu He’s motivations feel reshaped to serve the tragedy rather than emerging naturally from the character the series itself spent episodes building.

In the end, Kill to Love didn’t leave me crying. It instead left me conflicted and disappointed. Not because it broke my heart, but because it asked me to accept that love means deciding, alone, to destroy the person who loves you most “for the greater good.” And I’m not convinced that’s the story it spent twelve episodes telling.

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A stepping stone for historical BL and bl wuxia

This drama really took me by the throat. And to me this was something I had been waiting for a very long time. I won’t shut up from saying that this is definitely a stepping stone for the genre, which is historical bl. I honestly think this drama had everything one could expect and I could see bits of The Untamed here and there and couldn’t stop from wondering what chance we could have had now, in 2025/2026. We've come a long way and eight or seven years ago I would have never hoped for something like this to come to life.

Acting was great, I’m impressed by the two young protagonists. The way Duan Zi Ang was portrayed felt very intense, the actor did amazing at expressing all his gut-wrenching emotions. His character was full of contrasts and interior battles which he certainly showed with Anakin Skywalker vibes. There were moments where I was totally in awe with his acting. I can say the same for Mi Jin, even though he had a bit of an easier job considering the steady and chill poise of Xiao Shu He, but he delivered a perfectly coherent and fierce young man.
The story was solid, in the first half it made a lot of sense and I appreciated the way facts and multiple characters intertwined. Starting from episode 7 things got a bit stretched for me, and I still think this could’ve easily been a 10 episodes drama. Some parts were prolonged, some dialogues way too slow. But in its wholeness I loved every bit of it, being the Chinese way of expressing conflicts. I love poetry and everything always feels so poetic and frail in these dramas, even when things get hectic.
I didn’t foresee their relationship being the way it was towards the end. Duan Zi Ang certainly is possessive and we could all see that from the very start, and man do I love tragedy and characters being overly dramatic, but still, I still think he acted out of his typical self a few times and all the push and pull was, at some point, exaggerated.
I liked every character, especially the supporting ones for whom I'd grown a soft spot. Dialogues were wonderful, not a common script for a bl series for sure. The quality of the discussions and the thoughts expressed out loud, often coming from the heart and soul, was remarkable. Most of all I appreciated how their love was multifaceted, complex, perfectly mixed with both pure emotions and the darkest, deepest corners of a man's soul. Neither of them is a perfect character and their flaws made their relationship intriguing.
All I wanna say to end this is: prepare to shed some tears, get your heart wrecked and your soul absorbed. Get ready for the ending too, which wasn’t exactly satisfying for me and I’ll probably never accept it. In my eyes it was neither good nor bad, that’s debatable for sure. And debate on this drama could go on for years. 1000% recommend.

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A stunning, complex drama that manages to deliver even with a limited episode count.

I discovered Kill to Love by finding the trailer a couple of days before the first episode was due to air. The trailer alone intriqued me enough to want to check this title out, and my interest only grew as I researched more into it. An uncensored Chinese BL show, sharing the same director as the one from the Untamed? A story that reminded me very much of Priests' Qi Ye ( Lord Seventh), in that it carried a political background to it that intercepted into the romance plot line? A romance that dissolves into enemies and lovers about half way through?

This show had everything it needed to grab me, and I'm so glad that it delivered what it set out to do nearly perfectly.

Yes, I did say nearly perfect.

There is only one tiny nitpick I have about Kill to Love, and that is that 12 episodes feels much too short for this type of story. Now, I completely understand why the low episode count - and we should count our blessings that we even got this show show in the first place - but there's so much going on at times that for me, personally, I felt more time dedicated to expanding and letting the story and political intrique grow would have helped move this show up to a 10/10 rating.

Knowing that Kill to Love is based on a webnovel titled 'The Eternal Silence of Mountain and Rivers' (山河永寂) and which spans over 100 chapters, there's obviously a lot that happens in the story that we don't get to see developed fully or really hear about. And it can lead to confusing plot threads at times if the viewer isn't paying full attention. I feel like even a 20 episode count would have helped provide the time to flesh out the scale of things, especially during the second half of the drama after a timeskip takes place.

But again: this is a personal nitpick. While Kill to Love is shorter than ideal, my enjoyment was not any less because of it. There is still so much about this drama I loved, from the gorgeous costume designs and cinematography, to the incredible talent of the cast here. I have to give a major shout to Zhang Zhexu; who manages to portray the complexity of a caring and affectionate Duang Ziang who appears as the perfect husband for Xiao Shuhe, only for his actions of love later turning warped, obbsessive and controlling. He is truly a standout in this hugely talented cast, and with the chemistry he shares onscreen with Mi Jin it isn't difficult for the viewer to quickly find themselves growing invested in their characters' love story together.

If you're interested the slightest in this drama please do yourself a favour and give it a chance. I will warn that this doesn't have the happiest of endings (although there is an additional scene at the end which tries to leave the viewer on a happier note than the main story does) so be aware of that's not for you. But if you want a short, good show with a really engaging story and fascinating characters, this deserves a chance. I don't think I will ever stop recommending this to people, and I'm so very thankful that the show found a way to air uncensored.

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another absolute masterpiece out of china this year

h.o.l.y.s.h.i.t. this show is INSANE. idek where to begin honestly. oh i know, THE FUCKING CAST???? insane. these actors are INSANE. the chemistry is so real it genuinely makes you question everything. seeing the shift in both of the actors in the episodes after the time skip is crazy. like these actors are probably some of the best actors i have ever seen in a bl. they are so talented bro like i actually cant. the writing is so clever, the schemes are so well thought out, and these characters are just so complex. its so exciting and refreshing to see a bl thats more than just two guys randomly deciding to like each other. this show was DEPTH and i am so here for it. i would literally be dying for a new episode every single day of the week. this show had me HOOKED. im obsessed another 10/10 from china!!!!

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Hands down, my favorite series of 2025. It’s a masterpiece.

1. Duan Ziang – a killer with a heart that still dares to dream.

Forged in the shadows as an assassin, Duan Ziang is the blade that cuts through fate, a storm held back, that walks like a shadow among men. He carries the weight of a life without choices, where killing was survival and loyalty wasn’t earned, it was forced. But in his chest beats a heart that still dares to dream."My heaven and earth, from the very beginning has only ever been you." Everything he did wasn’t for glory or ambition, but for Shu He. “I don't care about the kingdom, I just want one person.” In his boundless love, he wanted to protect Shu He in every way possible, which ended up creating an irreparable rift. His decision to kill the crown prince to protect Shu He is the culmination of this duality: an act of love that shattered the very love he was trying to save. He killed to protect, but in saving Shu He, he lost what he wanted most. When he returns as emperor, he seeks not glory, but redemption. His power is armor against the vulnerability that Shu He awakens.

2. Xiao Shu He – The prince who was never meant to rule.

As the sixth in line to the throne, he grew up free from the weight of inheriting it, able to chase his artistic and humanitarian passions. Sensitive and idealistic, he was supposed to be the prince who will not rule, but fate had other plans. Thanks to Xiao Shu Qian’s greed, he was forced onto the throne and burdened with a role he never wanted. When he reunites with Duan Ziang, he’s torn between the man he loves and the empire he’s now sworn to protect. Deep down, Xiao Shue He can't overcome the resentment caused by his brother's brutal death, nor the fact that he was an incompetent ruler for his people, cause his heart was never in politics.

Their love isn’t soft or sweet, it’s fierce. It’s built on loss, sacrifice, and silences that scream louder than words. Both of them are trapped in a world that punishes vulnerability. Their love defied kingdoms, but it couldn’t outrun the consequences.

3. Xiao Shu Qian - The invisible hand shaping the fate of the main characters.

He’s the character that keeps the game in motion, even when he’s not on screen. Xiao Shu Qian isn’t just driven by ambition. He’s the invisible hand shaping the fate of the main characters. A quiet strategist, he knows that real power doesn’t come from brute force, but from bending circumstances to his will. He’s the one who pushes love and loyalty to their breaking points. For him, love is just another currency in the power game. He is unmoved, and it’s that lack of empathy that makes him truly cruel. He doesn’t destroy for pleasure, but out of necessity. And somehow, that makes him even more terrifying. While Duan Ziang and Shu He fight to carve out their own path against the tide of fate, Shu Qian stands for a world that doesn’t bow to love, a world that demands sacrifice and punishes those who dare to dream.

4. Acting — Eyes that speak.

Huge, huge kudos to the entire cast for bringing this masterpiece to life. I’ll be keeping an eye out for all their future projects, but I have to highlight Zhang Zhe Xu as Duan Zi Ang and Min Ji as Xiao Shu He, their performances were absolutely breathtaking.

Zhang Zhe Xu delivers a performance marked by restrained intensity. He doesn’t need dramatic outbursts, his eyes do all the talking. There are scenes where he doesn’t say a single word, yet you feel everything: the buried love, the regret, the longing for redemption. In the final scene, his gaze reveals flashes of clarity, as if he’s reading between the lines and sensing exactly what Shu He is about to do. His acting is powerful in every way: subtle, raw, and unforgettable.

Min Ji plays Shu He with devastating softness. He’s the prince who never wanted to rule, but was pushed onto the throne by forces beyond his control. There’s a quiet melancholy that runs through his entire performance, and that’s exactly what makes it so moving. The tension between duty and desire is the soul of his portrayal and Min Ji captures it with heartbreaking precision.

The chemistry between them is undeniable and intense. It goes beyond the script and turns every scene into visual poetry. This is the kind of show where eye contact tells its own story. Every glance between them is loaded with love, longing, pain, promise, and redemption. The words they don’t say hit harder than any dialogue, and every touch is charged with desire and sexual tension.

5. The peach tree

I got curious about its role in the series, so I did a little digging. In Chinese culture, it symbolizes immortality and unity, almost like a bridge between the earthly and the spiritual. Throughout the story, it becomes a place of refuge, the only space where Duan Ziang and Shu He can truly be vulnerable, away from the masks they wear as royals. It feels like a silent guardian, quietly witnessing their love. Every falling leaf is a memory. Every fruit left unpicked, a broken promise. Its deep roots reflect the shared past between them, even when fate cruelly pulls them apart. It stands for the resilience of a love that never died , even after years of separation. And more than that, it’s a symbol of longevity and immortality. Because even if their love never fully bloomed, like flowers that never open, it’s still eternal. A love that transcended time.

6. The ending

From the very start, I knew this was a story about doomed lovers. And even though I cried an ocean of tears, that bittersweet ending felt just right. For a brief moment, Duan Ziang and Shu He tasted earthly happiness, but they were never meant to be happy together in this world, not with all the guilt and pain they carried. In the end, they both got what they longed for most. Shu He finally makes peace with Xiao Shu Qian, who asks for forgiveness for shaping his fate. And Duan Ziang gets to live the quiet life he always dreamed of with Shu He by his side, far away from all the power games and political chaos. And yes, they did get their happily ever after.

This is one of those shows that’s going to stay with me for a long time.

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Bittersweet with a dash of pain

Normally, when there's already a lot of reviews for a show, I don't write one because normally my reviews are to try to convince people to watch. But rarely, there's times where I just need to get my emotions out on the page, regardless of how many people have watched.

This show... is everything and more than I thought it would be. I started watching it thanks to a Tumblr gifset (as one does) and got roped in immediately. The yearning, the chemistry... this show was kryptonite for me.

Duan Zi Ang was my favorite character. So flawed but so devoted to Shu He. It's the kind of love that makes you cry every time you witness it. Shu He, oh Shu He. He also loved Duan Zi Ang but was more devoted to his kingdom than to Duan Zi Ang, which ultimately led to their mutual disaster. Both actors did spectacularly conveying complex emotions, especially as newbies in the industry.

As for the side characters, they were a bit more 2D, but that was partially due to the time constraints of the drama. The "side couple," if you can call it that, was even more messed up than the main couple. (It also depends on who you think Huo Ying's partner actually is).

The story is convoluted and full of drama and plotting, and I couldn't see it ending any other way. Both characters had so much standing in between them that for them to have a happy ending it would have been a stretch. The ending they got fit them very much (and had me bawling). I normally don't go for BEs, but in this case I'll make an exception.

I will say, this story will not be everyone's cup of tea. Some people might say the plot was too weak, or the acting not great. I personally don't know that I could have handled this if I wasn't in a particular mood. But the timing was right and the story was so good that for me it very much was what I needed in this moment. If you're hesitant, I say give it a chance.

One tiny thing that did pull me out of the story almost every time I saw it though: their manicure! Every time they zoomed in on their hands and I saw their (what looked to be acrylic) nails, I almost laughed. There's no way this martial artist has a perfect manicure, and no way that a prisoner would have wonderful looking nails like those. I don't know whose idea it was to give them fake nails, but I think it would have been fine if they just had their regular nails for this, lol. But that's just a tiny thing that I noticed.

ANYWAY! I'm going to go cry some more now. Bye~

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doomed romance masterpiece

God I just don't know where to begin with this. Probably about to be a long and slightly scatter-brained review.

I wish the show had the budget it deserved so it could have more episodes and the plot would be given more time to breathe because everything happened so insanely fast, but the story behind this is so solid. Xiao Shuhe and Duan Zi'ang became friends as children but circumstances separated them shortly after they formed their bond. They meet again years later after Duan Zi'ang has been manipulated by an assassin organization to be their weapon against Xiao Shuhe's family and he's given the mission to kill Xiao Shuhe's brother, Xiao Shuqian. Then begins a game of manipulation. Xiao Shuhe realizes Duan Zi'ang is the assassin who tried to kill his brother almost immediately but due to the fact of their shared history and a plot of his own to ensnare the palace official who has corrupted his brother, Xiao Shuhe allows Duan Zi'ang to stay in his residence. As the two of them spend time together, they start to fall deeply in love and decide to abandon their revenge plans, and as Xiao Shuhe's relationship with his brother becomes more and more strained and his life comes under threat, the two of them can no longer deny these feelings. Then Duan Zi'ang makes a choice to save Xiao Shuhe's life -- an action that Xiao Shuhe had previously warned him would be unforgiveable if he took it -- that shatters their romance. While there's resentment and anger and hurt between them, the love never went away. Duan Zi'ang desperately tries to cling to the past, becoming a monster that even rivals Xiao Shuqian, while Xiao Shuhe becomes a shadow of his former self as he's lost everything he held dear due to that one action Duan Zi'ang took.

MAJOR props to Zhang Zhexu and Mi Jin for the way they portrayed these characters. There are so many moments in the second half of the show that basically left me breathless because of their talent in bringing this story to life. I can't even begin to imagine how grueling it must have been to perform some of those downright devastating scenes. And we also have to give huuuuuuuuge props to Li Yixiang, who portrayed the beloved Shen Song in his first time acting and is also one of the script writers who gave us this beautiful show.

Also as a lover of horny media, I have to say the first half of this show is one of the most erotically charged pieces of media I've ever seen. The sexual tension was insane every time Xiao Shuhe and Duan Zi'ang interacted prior to their first kiss, and while that energy was less frequent in the second half due to the circumstances of their situation after Duan Zi'ang's "betrayal," there are multiple moments where the sexual tension is still palpable, even when Xiao Shuhe has every reason to hate Duan Zi'ang. I feel the need to discuss the sensuality of this show because I feel like A LOT of erotic media tends to include scenes of dubious consent or straight up non-con and depicting it in an erotic way [stares at Revenged Love and Desire]. So any media that has an erotic atmosphere but doesn't try to gaslight me into finding assault desireable is already revolutionary in my book. In addition to that, there is also a beautiful scene of a wedding ceremony which just the visual of that alone is revolutionary and it means so much to me as a lesbian to be reminded that we have always existed.

I do have a few gripes with the show though so I can't give it a full 10/10 - the fact that the only women in this entire show are unnamed maids who show up for a couple minutes and a Ji Bei princess who is given a name but doesn't even get the chance to speak; the abuse apologia of trying to make Xiao Shuqian seem less bad when he gives Huo Ying the antidote to the poison when he's dying, as if that makes up for the fact that he poisoned Huo Ying in the first place or how horrifically Xiao Shuqian treated him for the previous 7 episodes (or how abusive he was to Xiao Shuhe!); some plotlines feeling very incomplete (Gu Yuanshan never has to face justice for his responsibility in getting multiple people close to Duan Zi'ang and Xiao Shuhe killed and he just fully disappears after Xiao Shuqian dies, Duan Huaiyi's very odd behavior and the fact that his reunion with Duan Zi'ang happened through the assassin organization which seemed to be setting him up as an antagonist for Duan Zi'ang but it just goes nowhere); the (very likely) AI usage in episode 9 given the very limited budget the show had; and honestly the final scene felt like pure wish fulfillment as it contradicts the scene that came just before it. But overall what a beautiful and epic tragedy. Xiao Shuhe I love you sooooo much.

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He let the world burn for him.

Whooo boy this was a rollercoaster of a series to watch. I went into it with knowledge of the ending and a few other events, but even with that I ended up with my jaw on the floor at least on three separate occasions.

Despite my score only being a 7.0/10, I did enjoy this series. I thought it had ideas that were great and would suit my taste perfectly, except what bogged it down was definitely the pacing. If I had to guess, it was probably because they adapted a lengthy novel into a series that couldn't go beyond twelve episodes. It's a common issue even Chinese dramas with over thirty episodes face. If it had been given at least double the length, I think it would have been revolutionary in the BL drama sphere. That being said, I still think it shows a good sign for future Chinese BL dramas to be adapted without censorship. I sincerely hope that other novels like Mo Dao Zu Shi and Thousand Autumns can have faithful adaptations to follow suit in future years. I think this spells something positive for LGBTQ+ novels getting adapted, and I'm really happy about that.

Now going into the story itself, there was a lot to unpack. Let me start off by saying that I thought the show looked great for clearly being a lower budget BL series. The costumes were amazing and I liked a lot of the hairstyles as well. The swordplay was nice and fight scenes, though sparse, were hype. Not to mention how they used their environments to the best of their ability and the music was mostly pleasant. I say mostly because there were times when the music would be so loud in scenes that my eardrums would be blasted like I was at a rave. But the songs themselves were pretty nice; not that it's surprising considering most Chinese dramas tend to have decent music. I was just happy seeing a BL be given that same treatment.

The acting was decent, but I never felt that it was extraordinary. That is not an insult to the actors as I think they did well for what they were given, just that none of them seemed to "envelope" their characters in a way that would be hard to replicate for any other actor. The actor that I think did the best was probably Shu He's by a small margin. But that might just be my bias talking as he was undeniably my favorite character in the series. The central couple performed the intimacy scenes well and it didn't feel forced.

The plot was really intense and it felt like there was always something important brewing. I think the short amount of episodes made it hard to feel like there was "period of peace" in-between all of the drama. As I said earlier, my jaw was on the floor multiple times because of how caught off guard I was by certain scenes. I'm not gonna lie, when the crown princes were both cut through I was flabbergasted since I didn't think they'd actually kill them off so early on. I was still parading in the streets when Shu Qian got alley-ooped off the fifth story bridge. I also was feeling whiplashed when both of the old guy emperors were killed off by their sons when they only had like three scenes TOPS. Shu Qian and Zi Ang both had that dog in them, so when they were squaring off on the bridge I was so hype because Shu Qian had finally met his match of crazy. Zi Ang didn't disappoint either since he sent that mofo flying.

Though, an issue I think this series had (or maybe the translation), was that it felt like a lot of plot points were too vague or confusing to the point that when secrets were revealed, I was left confused on just what was happening. I was actually paying attention for 90% of the drama too, so I was even MORE confused on what was happening. When it was revealed on the bridge that Zi Ang was a "spy" for the North and Shu He was shell-shocked, I was just like "Wait, didn't you already figure this out?" because Shu He had been suspecting him since episode one. Then I backtracked and did the mental math and realized "Oh yeah, he only knows he wants to murder his older brother, not that he is on the North's side." There was also a lot of plot points that were briskly mentioned/shown in the latter half regarding the time skip that were hard to immerse myself in because it all had to happen super quick in a short amount of time despite the fact that it needed episodes of build-up before execution. I also had no idea on who was guilty in the past or not and the Prime Minister Gu was just never mentioned nor shown again after Shu Qian died. I also had no idea what the drama surrounding the sudden marriage alliance was nor how it actually ended, but maybe I just wasn't paying attention enough in that episode.

The central core of this series was definitely its characters and I think that was its saving grace. I loved Shu He and the writers truly succeeded at making me sympathize with his character. He was someone that was forced into a terrible situation by the people around him and felt like he had no control over his life, When he said "I am nothing, and I own nothing" I really felt sorry for him because he suffered greatly. A man that only ever wanted to live a peaceful life devoid of bloodshed ended up having to watch his kingdom be razed to the ground and his family massacred. I could relate to how he felt toward his brother since I've also been in a situation where I longed for a family member to acknowledge my existence and not see it in a bad light, yet end up never having that person's time of day nor love. Of course, his situation with Shu Qian was far more extreme than that, but at its core it was a feeling of longing for love from someone that couldn't care less about you. Most of the time in stories I tend to find characters that cling on to people that treat them terribly to be insufferable, but I think they wrote Shu He's situation quite gracefully. His expectations were never too high, yet even he knew the bare minimum of what he expected from those around him would never be met. Then he gets trapped in a borderline abusive relationship with his lover near the end after having to accept that he was a major let down to his people; despite never wanting to be the emperor whatsoever. His exit from the story made perfect sense for how he had been written up until that point and so I accepted it far better than a lot of other viewers probably did.

Zi Ang was definitely a special case for me. I tend not to like characters where their major personality points all are centered around their love interest, but I ended up liking him despite that. I think something that made it tolerable was that his initial meeting with Shu He was never intended to form a romantic relationship, which made their subsequent development of feelings all the more believable. His options post-darkening were also portrayed (in my eyes) in a more negative light, and I could accept them much easier as a result; I'm largely more forgiving of these kinds of characters if the author is self-aware and doesn't sugarcoat everything that they do (which I believed was portrayed through Shu He's suffering and Zi Ang's subtle guilt). I could believe that someone deprived of affection like Zi Ang would latch onto someone like Shu He, a person that was full of love to give. I enjoyed how he wasn't afraid to take the moral low ground in their relationship and when he acted berserk later on my eyes were glued to the screen. That being said, the pacing made it hard to understand why he went berserk to the extreme that he did. Though, he was shown to always have that dog in him, so I didn't find it *that* far-fetched that he turn all yandere; "If I want you dead, you will die. If I want you alive, you will live. Not even the king of the underworld could take you from me," which ended up being proven true since Shu He never escaped him even in death. Something that I didn't like about him was the poison plot they assigned to him; I'll be honest, I'm dead tired of authors using the whole "poison from years ago resurfaces and now I have two months left to live" trope. It's so overused and I have yet to see it executed in a satisfying way. When they brought that plot point up with him I swear I felt my eyes roll so far into the back of my skull that I could see my nerves or whatever else is back there.

The other characters were underdeveloped because of the short run time. Though, they did well as stand-alone characters in the story. Shu Qian was a character that they did a good job of making me despise until even after his death; I did not accept that he was forgiving in the afterlife though-I rejected that on behalf of Shu He. Him going crazy and ending up deranged due to the corruption of power was unsightly, yet believable as history has shown it happen time and time again. I just wish we could have seen more scenes of them getting along as well as the scenes that could show little seeds of doubt being planted in Shu Qian from an early age that conflicted with his love for his brother. I wasn't a fan that most of their backstory was gatekept behind exposition to the point that I couldn't tell when Shu He was being honest or just fibbing for an act. I couldn't believe he'd have an off-screen redemption arc in the afterlife after he tried to murder his little brother right before he died despite his brother trying to defend him. Also, not him calling out his brother for "sharing a bed" with a guy who was playing him like a fiddle; have some decency and don't roast your lil bro like that LMAO. That scene had me dead.

Huo Ying and Shen Song were in a similar boat as I liked them individually, but they were never really fleshed out. I also couldn't care less about any of the romances surrounding Huo Ying. I couldn't even tell he liked Shu Qian until other people pointed it out since I never interpreted their interactions as even 0.1% romantic. Also, working under someone for 17 years when you are barely in your mid twenties is CRAZY work. Seriously, what were even the ages of all of the characters when they were committing all of these crimes??? When it was revealed that Shu Qian was 24 I was dead since it made no sense that people thought he plotted a high treason crime of the Duans if he was really that young back then. But anyway, Shen Song deserved better than to pine for a guy that had no interest in him romantically. I did end up enjoying their platonic relationship though as a result of the unrequited feelings. I liked how Shen Song was a good friend of Shu He, yet I swear 20% of what he said to him had a sexual undertone when referring to Zi Ang like when he whispered that he could "be with him" after treating his wounds in like episode ten. Despite that, I liked his integrity as a doctor and his sassiness was always welcome.

The character that really annoyed me was Huai Ying: Zi Ang's annoying little adopted brother. Seriously, what was his problem? For being a guy that was raised as a monk, he was sure good at switching up as a greasy glazer of his psychotic estranged brother. His switch up was wild and I was mad confused on why he was acting so hostile to Shu He and Shen Song when they both helped him. I was actually waiting for him to stop glazing yet he never did. Then they had the audacity to sit him at the little round table in the final episode and chill with the lot of the characters that were still alive and expect me not to burst out laughing as if they were all homies despite half of them not liking each other. Like, this isn't a Disney Channel special, y'all. Let's be serious.

There were also a lot of high-ranking guys like the Prime Minister, the General, the two Emperors, the Crown Prince of the North along with his sister, that were just thrown to the curb writing-wise. Like, they got sidelined and off-screened mostly and that was disappointing.

In conclusion, I really did like the premise of this story, just not necessarily its execution. I love a good dark romance, and lovers to enemies? Sign me the fuck up! If the novel ever gets an official English translation, I can picture myself buying it as well. I would like to see how the pacing in the source material compares to the series' adaptation. All in all, would I recommend this? Yes, but someone needs a fair warning of the material it portrays as it can get pretty dark. Now, I will go watch edits of this show with "Let the world burn" by Chris Grey playing the background. ╰(✿´⌣`✿)╯♡

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Good BL in a bad series

I fell asleep while watching ... Twice, mind you ... I also dozed off a few times and yawned my way through the whole thing.

That's how slow and boring this drama was.

Now I don't want to be unfair, because judging this as a BL, the love story is so good and well excuted also the chemistry was great.
Another thing that influences my judgement is I'm not a huge fan of Wuxia genre, whenever they hug and fly I roll on my couch and laugh like the joker.
I always find them very slow and full of unnecessary twists, I couldn't even finish one of the most loved Chinese bromance/censored BL ever made because of that.
So I knew I wouldn't give this a full mark, yet!! It's only 12 episodes so I was slightly optimistic, that's about the time I usually start to drop them so I thought it'll be safe, and judging by the recent Chinese BLs that are made without censorship, I was too excited ~~

Little did I know...

I won't go into the details because I don't want to get attacked by fans, but I'm giving my two cents here, the drama isn't really as great as edits made it looks, but it's a nice love story if you are a fan of Wuxia genre.

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