The Journey to Killing You (2025)

Tragic but make it romantic!

If you ask me, how will I describe this drama? I have only 2 words: Beautiful and brutal. Contradicting but apt! The premise looks simple, but it is as deceptive as its characters. Kataoka Kinji, a yakuza boss, is being sent into hiding and his only companion is Odajima Ren, a stoic subordinate. What he isn't aware of is Odajima's true mission, which is to end his life.
In this journey of 6 episodes, it managed to take that thin thread of deception and tackle loyalty, guilt, and the terrifying intimacy of being seen by the very person who is meant to destroy you. The story is written on the fragile spine of betrayal, breathing in those long sighs and silences, and standing ashore waiting for the sound of the gun that may or may not fire.

Kataoka is written like a man who is trying to remain gentle in a world that keeps punishing softness. He is aware of the danger, maybe even of the betrayal brewing beside him, but refuses to meet cruelty with suspicion. His insistence on kindness may look foolish but it becomes an act of power. Odajima, in contrast, is the kind of man you mistake for cold until you realise he is just tired. Tired of killing, of surviving, of existing. His loyalty is both his prison and his weapon. Watching him falter, hesitate before pulling the trigger, linger too long in a gaze he shouldn’t return was devasting and made him and that world look so much human.

What follows between them isn't fluffy romance or love turning yakuza into a saint redemption arc...but something murkier. There is no rush, no grand declarations, just very long stretches of silence that are enough to drown the miseries of both of them. Somehow, the story stops being about whether Odajima will kill Kataoka, but more about whether he can still live with himself if he doesn't.
Their relationship is equal parts longing and equal parts regret, and the writing doesn't try to sanitise the messiness of it and I think that is where the drama won me over! Both of them are morally grey characters with twisted and tragic pasts. There is a glimmer of hope and laughter here and there in their interactions but it is fleeting. I won't say it balances the grittiness but it definitely softens it to not choke and trip on the darkness. Also, their kisses and NC scenes were done very well!

Coming to the antagonists, it feels comical calling them antagonists because in the yakuza world, it’s never about good versus evil. It’s more like figuring out who is less bad, or maybe bad in a way that still follows some twisted kind of principle. Kirii Keito, all arrogance and envy, wants to eliminate Kataoka not just for power, but for being everything he can’t be -loved, respected, human. On paper, he is a terrible person but once I stand in the worn-out shoes of a child who never felt loved and was neglected, he just seemed less monstrous.

If I am being objective, we could have used 2 more episodes to flesh out the journey better because the last episode did feel a bit rushed, and the editing was a bit messy. It just felt a little short. But in any way that didn't hinder my enjoyment at all.

Acting-wise, everyone overall delivered. It was my first time seeing both the leads, and I think they both did pretty well. The opposite attract trope was played well. I can sit and nitpick but I don't want to.

Cinematography was another aspect that floored me. I have a soft spot for anything filmed near water. And I liked how significantly it was used. The past and present colour grading was fabulous too. They managed to ace the atmosphere.

Overall, this isn’t a BL that hands you easy comfort. It’s deliberate, restrained, occasionally cruel in its honesty. It was such a delight to see two "dangerous" men realise that love in this world is not a promise of salvation but a mirror showing who you really are when all the worldly masks fall away.
I would definitely recommend it but please read the TWs (dubcon, violence) and don't go in expecting fluff. It is anything but that!

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This Show Feels Weird in a Good Way

Our first Japanese Mafia BL and it did not disappoint. This series is haunting, strange, and unforgettable, a story that dives into love, trauma, and redemption with a kind of poetic brutality only Japan can pull off.

Odajima’s past shattered my heart. No child should grow up in a home where love is replaced by violence and silence. His father’s cruelty and his mother’s refusal to protect him created a boy who learned to survive, not to love. When he killed his father, it wasn’t born from hate, it was the only way out. And when his mother asked to die by his hands too, something inside him broke beyond repair. From that moment, Odajima became a man who could take a life but never believe he was worthy of one filled with love.

Then comes Kataoka, his light and his undoing. Odajima was sent to kill him, yet Kataoka became the only one who taught him how to live. Their bond unfolds slowly, through teasing, warmth, and quiet gestures that speak louder than words. When Kataoka talks about marriage, it’s both ridiculous and heartbreakingly sincere, because you can feel that for the first time, Odajima is learning what love might feel like.

And then the title makes perfect sense, A Journey to Kill You. Odajima’s mission is to end Kataoka’s life, but his heart refuses to obey. The man who was never loved has finally found someone who does, and that is the cruelest pain of all, to love the one you were meant to destroy.

This series delivers some unforgettable moments: Kataoka half-dead in a hospital bed, still managing to flirt with a nurse saying, “If I stay here, my wife will get jealous.” I laughed through my tears. And then, that lipstick-on-the-lips-of-a-dead-man scene, shocking, bizarre, yet somehow deeply fitting for a show that constantly blurs the line between madness and devotion. Japanese BL never fails to surprise, and this one proves it again.

What I didn’t like was the inconsistent tone and low-budget feel. The first episode throws you straight into an SA scene that’s brushed off too casually, and it left a sour taste. Some moments, like the dead bird scene, felt random and disconnected from the emotional core. Kataoka’s violent outbursts contrasted oddly with his tender moments, making it hard to understand who he truly was at times.

Still, despite the flaws, A Journey to Kill You is a bold and deeply emotional series. It’s not just about love, it’s about pain, redemption, and finding warmth in a world that taught you only how to bleed. It’s unsettling, poetic, and strangely beautiful.

Ironically, the car scene in Episode 1 was the one everyone hated.
But in the final episode, that same setting became something else entirely, filled with emotion, chemistry, and one of the most beautiful kisses I’ve ever seen.

This is why we watch BLs.
In just six episodes, we witnessed two characters grow, change, and learn to truly see each other.
By the end, every glance, every touch, felt earned, a quiet reminder of how love can blossom even in the shortest journeys.


I even wrote a poem inspired by one of my favorite scenes, it was that powerful and beautifully tragic.

Odajima’s childhood is a wound that never heals,
a small boy trapped in a house where love was slain.
No child should ever bear such sorrow,
to wake beneath the same roof as rage,
where a father’s fists spoke louder than words,
and a mother’s silence hurt more than any blow.

She gave him life, yet turned away from it,
her gaze a cold winter that froze his heart.
His home was no home,
but a battlefield of broken dreams,
where laughter died before it could be born.
When he raised his hand against his father,
it was not hatred that guided him,
it was survival, desperate and trembling.
But fate’s cruelty was not done,
for the woman who should have saved him
begged to die by his hand as well.
In that moment, the last light in his soul went out.
How could a boy like that ever learn
what love is meant to feel like?

Then came Kataoka,
the man Odajima was sent to kill,
yet somehow, the man who taught him to live.
Kataoka’s warmth melted the frost of his years,
his teasing words, his careless laughter,
his gentle talk of marriage,
all small miracles that stitched Odajima’s heart
back together, thread by trembling thread.

But destiny is merciless.
His mission whispered, kill him.
His heart screamed, don’t.
For the man who had never been loved
had finally found someone who did.
And that, perhaps,
is the cruelest agony of all,
to be torn between duty and love.

When danger came, Odajima stood ready
to give his life for Kataoka,
but it was Kataoka who took the bullet instead.
Now he lies in a cold hospital bed,
his breath shallow, his heart fading.
Odajima weeps beside him,
his face shattered with grief,
his voice breaking as he pleads,
“Please don’t die… you are the reason I live.”

There is nothing sadder than this,
a man who spent his life unloved,
who finally found warmth in another’s arms,
only to lose it in the blink of fate.
Odajima’s heart beats now
not for himself,
but for a love slipping away.
And as the monitor hums its sorrowful tune,
the world watches a tragedy unfold,
a boy who never knew love
learning it only through loss.

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I want to kill you, but can I live without you?

A dark Yakuza romance that hit me with a wave of emotions that I had never felt before.

As an admirer of unconventional Yakuza/Gangster romance previously, I've read my fair share of novels, mangas and manhwas. Most of them amazed me with their intriguing storytelling, but I had yet to meet the drama of my imagination and THIS WAS IT. My words are not enough to describe how I feel about this drama.

✧ Storyline:
Just like any other Yakuza dramas, this had one traumatic unforgettable night and a deadly fling with a warm fire lantern. When the past haunted him, the lantern gave him light and warmth which kept him safe and sane.

✧ Acting:
The actors who played Kataoka, Odajima and Kairii, did a brilliant job of portraying the characters who felt like they jumped out of the manga, so alive and real. There's one thing that kept me going through was the constant tension between the two leads. I never mentioned this in any reviews, but I have to admit, it was the best JBL kiss I've ever seen. Best in terms of what? Delivering emotions. I've never felt emotional watching a kissing scene. Indeed, I was. So beautiful!

✧ Cinematography:
The best. The colour grading, dark and yellow tones created a lot of tension in serious situations. The camera angles and lighting added depth to the characters. There were many scenes where the screen was closely dark and yet the character's emotions were portrayed skillfully.

✧Music:
My love for the OST, Tsurezure, knows no bounds. From the moment I heard it for the first time as the intro, I was sold. It's been playing on repeat with my other fav OSTs of the year. Just fabulous! Other than the OST, the melancholic music pulled my heartstrings. It was sad yet so soulful.


✵ Honestly, I had no idea about the release of this drama, so I started watching it only knowing the fact it was a Yakuza romance and that's all I needed to know. I was blown away by the contrast between the light and dark aura of the characters and the storyline. In every episode, I felt that "pang" in my chest, hands covering my mouth in awe, disbelief and also there were several instances where I could hear those thumping heartbeats in my ears echoing. Altogether, the angst had me in the palm of their hands, gripping, choking, and I let them torture my heart willingly. My heart ached for Odajima. His eyes, his heart, how empty and traumatized it was that he never lived for himself. That scar of survival bears deep wounds that never healed fully until Kataoka opened the wound and let it heal slowly. Kataoka was the missing piece of Odajima's life he didn't look for, and yet he became the most important person he'd live for. Their storyline deeply moved me. Definitely going to rewatch and binge this soon.

Overall, it was an awesome experience watching my manga faves alive. They needed no publicity or anything, but unexpectedly, this proved to be one of my greatest BLs of the year 2025. If you are interested in torturing your heart with the prickly thorns of BL Yakuza romance, then sure you will not be disappointed.

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Short, to the point, dark but without unnecessary drama

This is an example of what japanese productions do better than most. They do take a medicore, sexualized manga and make it into one of the best BLs we can wish for. The story is straightforward, there is no fluff in the beginning but the actors understand to portrait their characters to perfection with nuances in their facial expressions and glances.

What this production also did right is, we get real kisses and real NC-scenes which is not as common for JBLs as we could wish for. Cinematography is on point and production quality is high (besides the walk to the grave where a continues error appears). There is nothing to complain about. Of course this BL is not for everyone because it starts very dark. Yakuza are not the nicest people on this planet. And because it's dark, it's not fluffy at all even when Kataoka always tries to lighten the mood. He knows exactly what Odajima is up to, but he takes it as a given and does not care. But Odajima grows and realizes that all his hate was a misunderstanding and he finally finds peace with his past.

So overall, this is a perfect BL to binge-watch and just enjoy it.

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The Journey To Greatness

Wow, I was not expecting this! The series is hard to describe yet somehow made scrutable by the organic, unadorned human interactions. It is sequences of contradictions composed of oxymoronic concepts. Full of opposites yet seemingly archetypical. The story itself is dark, yet there are always whispers of light coming just around the corner or just over the horizon. There is unfathomable sadness yet always followed by a tactility of frivolity or irreverence, making us feel and see that life must be viewed in contextual terms. Protagonists share long periods of silence between just exposing individual pain that speak volumes of comfort and serenity simply in the way they look back at each other. I could go on, but you get the concept. It is a series that is so unique and one that, in a sense, is seminal, even if it may not feel so.

I did not watch this series; I experienced it. It is a rarity for me to feel characters. Not just the protagonist, but the antagonists as well. All were made relatable, even though I could not link with any of them. I was completely unfamiliar with their world and its culture, which I do not understand and have very little knowledge of. Yet, the story and the organic feel to the acting made it such that I could perceive and discern what the characters were going through. Being unwanted, lost, hopeless, unloved, living like outcasts, or not belonging, and ultimately the inner anxiety about facing the question of why are you even here were portrayed with such deep dimension and personal depth that it draws you in; it absorbs you. The story vividly portrays a setting that feels especially bleak and melancholic, yet it retains a subtle atmosphere that life is still worth living. Even at its lowest points, the narrative never descends into utter hopelessness.

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gritty yakuza story with romance

Overall: this was a darker story and I didn't review it against fluffy stuff. 6 episodes about 25 minutes each. Adapted from the manga "Anata wo Korosu Tabi " by Asai Sai which I haven't read and I reviewed the series on its own merits. Aired on GagaOOLala https://www.gagaoolala.com/en/videos/5800/the-journey-to-killing-you-2025-e01 (not available in Thailand, Japan, Korea or Taiwan)

Content Warnings: past (murders, incest, assisted suicide, blood, domestic abuse/violence, child abuse); rape (see the spoiler comment for more info), violence, blood, animal death, attempted murder, threatened/near suicide

What I Liked
- a darker premise
- acting
- styling
- caring moments
- production value

Room For Improvement
- nonsense stuff: in the past why didn't he call for help in episode 2, why did 1 character wait 7 years to make a move on the other character, miraculous healing power, not wearing something in episode 5

Spoiler for the type of ending:
it's a happily ever after for the leads

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Surprisingly thought provoking Yakuza story

I did not expect to find a show focused on Yakuza characters to be somehow beautiful and feel like a deep meditation on being human, but here we are.

It feels in a way more like a character study than a plot focused story, although that is not to say there is no plot or that the plot is poorly executed. It's more that the two main characters and their emotional journey are the focus of the story, rather than the sequence of events that brings them together and moves them to the next stage of their journey.

The characters are morally grey; they have done things that by objective standards are wrong, but as we learn more about them, the complexities of who they are and their motivations complicate any simple assessment of "right" or "wrong" (in terms of their overall charcter, not necessarily individual actions).

Despite being a short series, the story of who the characters are unfolds slowly over the episodes. We continue to gain new insights into them until the last episode. The pace feels very meditative and non-linear, which compliments the complexity of the characters. Despite being "slow" in a certain sense, the scenes are very tightly written, and everything feels purposeful, contributing to the story (plot), the insight into the characters, and the development of the themes.

Some spoiler-full discussion of the first scene (an apparent SA) and the character's relationship below:
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So, the show opens with what appears to be a sexual assault. In a parked car, Kataoka opens a sleeping Odajima's shirt and moves on top of him. The scene cuts to Kataoka seemingly having sex with a sleeping Odajima, who then opens his eyes with a bored/annoyed expression and asks him what he is doing. In the moments after, Odajima thinks to himself that he will kill Kataoka, but this does not seem to be because of what just happened, but rather a larger purpose (which is confirmed in the immediately following scenes).

First, I would say that from a story-telling perspective, this is not there as fan service or to romanticize SA. The scene effectively shows us who the characters are at the moment the story opens: Kataoka does what he wants regardless of rules, and Odajima is enduring with the goal of killing Kataoka.

Second, while there is nothing about this sexual encounter that would rise it to the level of "enthusiastic ongoing consent" (and I'm not making excuses or suggesting this is an okay scenario) there are some reasons that we might consider it something more morally gray than a surface reading would imply. First, Kataoka makes a comment after that seems to imply that providing (for lack of a better term) "sexual services" is something that Odajima is known to have been doing within the organization. We get a partial confirmation of this later in the episode when we see him in a past-flashback with the Fourth Generation (the son of the boss who ordered the hit). Second, it is beyond improbable that Kataoka could have had sex with a sleeping Odajima without waking him in the positions they were in. So, either it wasn't actual sex, or Odajima particapted at some basic level and then sort of checked out while it was happening. Neither makes the scenario okay, but I think that either interpretation contributes to the understanding of the characters, and also reminds us that not everything that is said or done in the show can be taken at face value.

Third, Kataoka definitely knows in that first scene that Odajima has been hired to kill him. Again, this doesn't excuse it, but it contributes to the sense of moral gray in this world. There's no one who's wholey good or bad, and the actions of the two characters are steeped in a context of violence and death.

In the second episode they have a more consentual sexual encounter, although again, I don't think it quite rose to the level of "enthusiastic consent." Odajima faced with a sense of inevitability which detracts from his willingness.

Prior to the sex, they have a conversation in which Kataoka makes the seemingly bizarre statement that he's never forced anyone. Odajima objects but Kataoka jokes away his objection in a "your body says differently" sort of way. This seems to lend towards an interpretation that they did have sex in the car, which for me suggests that Odajima went along with it in his "enduring" sort of way that isn't consent but doesn't raise objection. For Kataoka, no objection is no different from consent.

Their encounter at the hotel is obviously different for Odajima on some level, though. He is a more active particiant than in the car or with his boss. A couple of episodes later, Odajima tells Kataoka that was his first time. Kataoka responds by declaring he must take responsibility and that Odajima is now his wife.

If we take this as truth, it's really a terrible bit of writing--cliched, boring stereotypical masculine response to virginity. But everything about the show so far tells us not to take it as truth. The comment Kataoka made at the beginning, the scene with Odajima's boss are direct clues, but also the ways in which the show keeps telling us one thing and showing another, or showing us a truth and complicating it with a contraditory truth tell us that everything has to be taken with a grain of salt.

I think that Kataoka knows this. He recognizes that this is not a factual truth, but an emotional one. What Odajima experienced with him was something new, on some level Odajima genuinely wanted and enjoyed being with Kataoka. And by this time, he also knows enough about Odajima's life to recognize how rare and precious and fragile such an emotion is for Odajima, maybe even more than Odajima himself recognizes it.

We've seen prior to this that Kataoka isn't cruel, and he has a protective streak. At the very beginning he tries to help a boy save a baby bird, and he laments his inability to save anything. He knows that Odajima might kill him at any time, and if not Odajima, then someone else, and he is, perhaps, feeling that he would like to leave something behind that is nurturing and positive rather than destructive.

So, when he realizes that Odajima has some kind of positive feeling for him, and knowing how much pain Odajima is in, his response about taking responsibility and making Odajima his wife is because he wants to nurture and protect that small good thing in Odajima's life. And it is this bit of goodness that is growing between them that becomes the basis of their relationship, not some weird fetishization of virginity and male obligation.

Anyway, if you've read this far, I'd love to know your thoughts. Does any of this interpretation match yours?

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Toxic and painfully romantic road trip between two Yakuza

I loved this BL drama featuring twisted and broken characters. I did expect nothing from it and I found myself completely immersed in the journey of the protagonists. Especially Odajima character who is played by Takahashi Hiroto and took my breath away at multiple points of the series. His cast counterpart Wada Masanari, playing the role of Kataoka Kinji, did also a solid job. I truly believed in the feelings shared by both their characters and the evolution of those...In the mere span of 6 episodes, it is quite astonishing how much they managed to convene, proof of a solid storytelling. The series definitely left me simmering in a bath of angst and pondering quite a bit over the course of my watch.

The opening generic song and art is really good. You feel the road trip / slice of life vibe in the scrap booking effects. It is done tastefully and very much fitting into the series. Overall the directing of the series was quite good, except in one of the action sequence that felt a bit cheap and artificially dramatic in its overuse of slow motion and its setting. It is of course minor details and did not decrease my overall enjoyment of the show.

I would recommend this to people that are looking for a quite dark BL story with some toxicity and power balance. The ray of light and hope the two main characters find in each other despite the dire circumstances in which they met, really tugged at all my heartstrings. It is certainly not withouth flaw as I felt the ending was a bit too easy and plot armor a bit too much at time. I would not have minded a longer epilogue but I am quite astonished at how much the script and actors manage to communicate, especially on the psyche and mental space of the characters in such a short length.

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One of the best BL series of the year

Under the guise of a Japanese mafia crime story, "The Journey To Killing You" shows how the unhappiness and consequences of childhood live on to influence and colour our adult lives.

The No. 3 lead, Kirii Keito, heir to leadership of his Yakuza clan, allows his perception of an unhappy childhood to morph into paranoia. The object of his suspicion, Kataoka, fostered by Kirii's father and raised in carefree happiness, is careless and absent ambition until he meets Odajima, tasked by Kirii to eliminate him as a rival. But while violence is no stranger to any of these men, the strongest force shaping their lives is Odajima's childhood trauma, redirected and then overcome by the intensity of what he and Kataoka find in each other.

The happy ending achieved here in this series is as undeniably satisfying as it is implausible, but this is a fantasy genre after all. Production values are excellent. Director Kamijo Daisuke never drops the tension or wastes a moment. One of the BL series of the year.

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Dark, mature, sweet

Dark, mature, and sweet—this is how I would describe The Journey to Killing You. The story follows Odajima and Kataoka. Kataoka is ordered to lay low, and Odajima is assigned to accompany him. What Kataoka doesn’t know is that Odajima carries a hidden mission: he has been instructed to kill him. For seven years, Odajima has also harbored a deep-seated hatred toward Kataoka, so this mission becomes his chance for revenge. But because they keep sleeping together and spending every day in close proximity, real feelings slowly begin to form.

I don’t know why, but even though Kataoka is a yakuza, I find him incredibly sweet—especially whenever he calls Odajima his “wife.” Meanwhile, Odajima is a broken character who carries childhood trauma, leading him to grow up directionless. Then someone finally treated him like family—only for that person to be killed as well. No wonder Odajima turned out cold, distant, and frigid. But I love how his character slowly develops throughout the series.

Japanese BLs really hit differently. They’re usually short, but they pack so much depth and emotion. There are a lot of good Thai BLs too, but the direction and storytelling style are just different. In this series, the cinematography and acting are both on point. If you prefer fluffy shows, this might not be your cup of tea. For me, it’s not a perfect series, but it’s definitely interesting and engaging.

If you’re into gritty crime-action BL with dark romance and forced proximity tropes, you’ll surely love The Journey to Killing You.

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literally in love

when I say I loved this drama I mean it. this has easily earned its spot in my top 10 bls of this year. from the storytelling to the actors this series had me so captivated. the only thing as satisfied as I was I wish there was just 1 more episode of just them two living together in the beach that there at and seeing their love since they seemed to both not be in the mafia/yakuza scene. I literally cried on the last episode from both sadness and gap that they finally got to be together. this is a truly must watch of an amazing Japanese BL. I need to see the actors together and act again as a pairing!

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