The Heart of Tsukuyomi

Bounded by fate, tested by poisoned love!

Out of all the Secret of Us productions, this stands out for me. This was exactly my type of drama.

This was a story of two wandering souls bound to meet by the death of their father; one was a biological son, Yuewen, the other, Gushan, was adopted. The storyline isn't as simple as it seems. There's more to it than it shows. It involves grief, resentment, attachment and fear of being abandoned.  

Characters were simply flawed and beautifully crafted. But as we know, these are very short episodes so they could show very little of everything. But it still has its flaws. Firstly, initially, Gushan's hair and makeup were very poorly done— I turned a blind eye to it. Then it was quite abrupt how they got closer. Which leaves the question that what made Yuewen feel attracted to a person whom he never met in life and suddenly became his brother? 
And lastly, I hate hate hate the romanticised smoking scenes.

Still, regardless of everything, it is still my favorite because of how realistically beautiful it was. The chemistry between the leads was instant. The affection, yearning and innocence of each character was intact till the end. The fiancé was supportive, understanding and loveable. There was no way Yuewen could dump her after dating for almost for a decade or so. So practically it was ideal how it ended. And I honestly, I saw it coming. The only thing Gushan understood was that he was abandoned again. There was no way he could be accepted wherever he goes. The decisions in relationships can't be taken impulsivly. So even if it breaks my heart, the outcome was inevitable. His life was painful since the beginning, so end should be peaceful.

Personally, I'm very fond of "not-so-smooth" endings, especially sad ones, because 5 years down the line, even if I forget what happened in the drama, I'll still remember how it ended. It's sadly memorable and weirdly I like it this way.

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Chronicles of honey and cigarettes

A pure love story turned so realistic in a split of a second.

This was very lovely in the beginning, then somehow they had to give us a slap of reality in our faces, but despite everything I think it was really beautiful, tragic yes but beautiful.

The chemistry between the two leads was amazing, one of them being innocently open and the other still in the closet is very real still was it really that important to show it in this story?

I don't think so, the story itself was going in a very innocent fairytale-like direction then a fiancé and a marriage appear and everything is changed.
The reason why I don't appreciate this change is because it made the ML a bad person, a coward and somehow a jerk. İn reality it's understandable that a straight guy with a lover would be surprised if he felt attracted to another guy but to do all that in the last ep, that's just too much.

I generally liked it, but I end it feeling sorry for one character, hating the other, and confused about the third ~

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Grief Disguised As Love

The Heart of Tsukuyomi is not a comforting watch, even if you go in expecting something sad. The final episode hits much harder than anticipated, leaving a heavy emotional impact that lingers. This is not a fluffy or romantic BL, it’s a story centered on grief, emotional neglect, and the damage caused by indecision. Gushan is often portrayed as weak, but his vulnerability comes from a lifetime of loss. He is adopted, emotionally deprived, and later loses the one person who truly loved him: his father. His attachment to his brother feels tragic rather than shocking, especially when you consider how starved he was for affection. When someone finally shows him care, it makes sense that he would cling to it. The brother’s inability to make a clear choice is what ultimately breaks everything. By continuing his relationship with his wife while emotionally stringing Gushan along, he creates confusion, false hope, and deep emotional pain. Gushan’s realization that he had already been abandoned, despite promises otherwise, is one of the most painful moments in the series. While the ending is devastating, the show excels in its acting, chemistry, and quiet tension. The yearning feels real, the emotions are raw, and the story never tries to soften its message. It’s a difficult watch, but a memorable one, especially if you appreciate BL's that aren’t afraid to sit with grief rather than resolve it.

Overall 8/10

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An Interesting Watch

I watched all 7 episodes. There are ways to find them on the internet...and even if you have to watch the subtitles in a language other than your own, the story line is easily understood.

Gushan is invited to return to China with Yuewen and his fiance'. It seems very clear that Yuewen truly wants to continue his relationship with Gushan...but secretly... as he plans to marry his fiance'. Gushan is heart broken and doesn't want to go to China under those terms with them. He remains in Japan.

Just like Gushan's heart is broken, the glass heart of the blue mushroom poison is broken. Yuewen receives a letter that Gushan has quietly ended his life with the poisonous blue powder.

It's a sad ending.

But....

Now...I know this sounds strange...but we DON'T have to accept the endings that are handed to us. The ending in a series is how the writers perceive the final outcome. It CAN be rejected...and in our own minds we can say, "That's YOUR idea of how it ends...but it's NOT mine." We can change the outcome...change the ending. It is fiction, so our own endings are just as valid as the writers ending.

So...how does my ending go?

Yuewen realizes that the house in Japan is the only world that Gushan knows. He understands that it wouldn't be possible for Gushan to thrive in China. If he were to go through with his plans of selling the house, Gushan would remain in Japan and once again become a wandering lost soul. Yuewen discusses this with his fiance'. Being the kind person that she is, she likes Gushan and wants the best for him. She points out to Yuewen that should he not sell the house they are no worse off than before he ever found out about the inheritance.

Yuewen discovers that his father left a modest trust fund for Gushan...enough for him to live a simple meager life.

He tells Gushan that the house will not be sold...instead, the house will become Gushan's home. Gushan will have to pay for the utilities. His trust fund should more than cover those basic expenses. With an embrace and a passionate kiss Yuewen promises Gushan that he will never leave him...and that he'll travel to Japan for two weeks at the beginning of each new season to stay with Gushan.

Yuewen perceives danger as he reflecst upon the blue mushroom powder. He understands Gushan's vulnerability and propensity towards becoming despondent when he feels abandoned. He decides that the mushroom tank, the mushroom shed and the blue mushroom powder must all be destroyed....or that Gushan in a moment of despair might someday take the poisonous blue mushroom powder to end his own life. Yuewen convinces Gushan to give him the mushroom powder. He then cuts off a small lock of his own hair and carefully places it into the glass heart. Gazing into Gushan's eyes, he places the glass heart and chain around Gushan's neck as though he were placing a ring of commitment on his finger....and seals the commitment with a passionately deep kiss.

Yuewen arranges to have the mushroom shed and the blue mushroom glass tank demolished. After the demolition is completed, Yuewen, his fiance', and Gushan set a fire to the remains of the shed, gazing into it until all that is left are ashes. And among those ashes are the ashes of Yuewen's and Gushan's father. They build a small memorial shrine for the father over the ashes.

Destroyed forever, the blue mushroom will never grow anywhere again.

Yuewen and his fiance' return to China without Gushan. The saddened Gushan remains in Japan..with feelings of uncertainty...teetering on fears of abandonment and hopelessness. But Yuewen texts him daily, throughout the day, every day, reassuring Gushan of his love....promising him that he'll return to their home in Japan very soon.

Yuewen is a man who has been torn into two...he loves his fiance and but he also loves Gushan. At first we're angry with Yuewen but we then remember that it was Gushan who seduced...pushed...and pursued Yuewen. We accept Yuewen's lack of culpability in the precarious and vulnerable position that fate threw him into.

Yuewen's texts are the life line to Gushan that nourish his soul with love and with hope. Remaining in the his home , he retains a sense of safety...of stability.

The beginning of the new season arrives...and along with it Yuewen flies to their home in Japan. He arrives alone....without his fiance'. This impossibly beautiful fairy tale romance between Yuewen and Gushan is possible, after all. For two weeks they live in a dream like bliss.

After two weeks, it's time for Yuewen to return to China. Gushan has come to terms of being in a relationship with a married man. With a sense of relief, he understands that Yuewen is not abandoning him.

The journeys back and forth to Japan continue. After two years Yuewen and his wife have their first child...and name him Gushan after their beloved brother/brother-in-law. Yuewen's wife has no knowledge or suspicion whatsoever of the romance between Yuewen and Gushan. The deception seem unfair...but it's the only compromise that keeps them all emotionally safe.

Yuewen calls Gushan, begging him to fly to China to meet his newborn nephew and namesake....and to accept him as a god son.

Gushan will forever be a timid man...unsure of himself....and lacking the self confidence that he can be a god father to a child. He conveys these concerns to Yuewen. Seeing this reluctance, Yuewen flies to Japan and convinces Gushan to accompany him back to China. When they arrive in China, they're met by Yuewn's wife at the airport.....with the newborn baby Gushan in her arms. With outstretched arms, Gushan rushes towards them, Yuewen at his side. They all embrace in a tear filled group hug.

Gushan had found not only the love of his life...but a family as well. And so, this impossibly beautiful fairy tale love continues, fuller and richer than Gushan could have ever hoped for. It not only survives but it thrives and prospers...and grows.

And so ends Season 1. Season 2 ... just as dreamlike...just as surreal...just as beautiful...will follow.

Just as we truly do...in one way or another...create our own destinies in life, we can choose to create our own endings to the BL series that we watch.

This ending is as real as the writers' ending. Never accept what you don't want to accept.

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Unique,well designed

So yeah the ending was sad. I will blame yuewan for all this because he played that fiance role even after cheating. He couldn't able to choose one and not even able to address all of this while guesan was alive. I mean he should have controlled himself before indulging in physical relation with guesan. Nonetheless good storyline, superb acting too , nice sensual music. Everything was well done in compare to the length os the series. Tho it could have been more detailed as in the last eps of addressing the relationships with his fiance and his step brother. Anyways , definitely a great watch!

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Under appreciated

The story feels real, filming and editing is superb!
While it's not as loveable as other bls this one feels like it's coming from the heart and it is beautifully filmed!

The story may be sad but I felt Gushan.
He was clearly not in the right place.
The only person who took care of him just died, of course he is gonna get attached to whoever cares for him. He felt loved again.
Yuewen was quite the villain, not only did he cheat on his fiancee but also made Gushan think that he cared.


I really liked this, because it feels realistic and not just "everything will be fine" because it won't always be.

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it started good then it went downhill

*huge spoilers: only read if you are okay with that*



im sorry but what was that ending? i hate it when they shock me in the last mins with something like this, that was kind of abrupt and cruel, like let us make the most drastic ending we can think of, why?
coudnt they simply separate and live their own lives ? as if cheating nonstop wasnt enough already to annoy me, lets kill one of them? maybe change it to a scene of the ml seeking therapy isnt that better?
the only good thing is that the mls had chemistry and also the start of the show wasnt bad and was kind of entertaining in a sense that i didnt see filler scenes nor i felt bored when i was watching, my rating could have been much lower if it wasnt for that

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Watched It for the Intimacy, Stayed for Nothing Else !

**There isn’t much to say about this drama, honestly.**
It felt **weird**, a little confusing, and the **ending was genuinely disappointing**.

Let’s get straight to the point.
**What did I like?**
The **intimate, steamy scenes** and the **kiss scenes**.
That’s it. End of list.

The plot was **messy**, underdeveloped, and clearly struggling to decide what it wanted to be. There was a serious **lack of direction**, and while the concept was *different*, different alone is not enough to save a drama. It wasn’t your typical “brothers-to-boyfriends” trope, which was refreshing, but that novelty couldn’t carry the entire show.

Was it terrible? **No.**
Was it good? **Also no.**

It sits somewhere in the awkward middle where you’re mildly entertained but never truly invested. You watch it, you finish it, and then you move on without feeling anything special.

**Overall rating: 6.5/10**
Decent acting, average cast, weak plot, and an ending that leaves you unsatisfied.

I honestly **don’t recommend it**, because this drama is **definitely not for everyone**. If you’re here only for steamy scenes, you might enjoy it. If you want a strong story and emotional payoff, this one probably isn’t for you.

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"Uma pessoa pode morrer silenciosamente como um cogumelo?" - Veneno, mel e fumaça...

Eu já tinha assistido, mas talvez pelo baque da história me esqueci de dar como validado e hoje acabei trombando novamente com o drama e assisti, com aquela sensação tremenda de deja vu.

A química entre os atores desde o início foi explosiva, ao mesmo tempo em que víamos o personagem Yuewen cuidando como irmão, o víamos flertando, até sem querer, mas sendo consumido pelo desejo por Gushan. Que por sua vez, após perder a única pessoa que cuidou dele, se viu sendo cuidado e amado, desejando se entregar aquele misto de sentimentos.
Os beijos foram espectaculares, a cena da entrega foi realmente de uma delicadeza sem fim.
O mel, representando a doçura e a pureza de Gushan se misturava com a fumaça tóxica, mas viciante de Yuewen.

Até que, aquela frase inicial transforma tudo, a noiva aparece, mas ela não tem culpa. Quem tem culpa foi o Yuewen, que assim que a viu já se entregou a ela sem nem lembrar da existência de Gushan, aquele que ele fez se esconder.
Sua presença era ameaça, assim como Tsukuyomi.

Não bastou uma vez, e então se entregar novamente ao irmão adotivo. E as cenas refletem exatamente isso, a entrega inicial foi colorida, amarelada, como um novo sol saindo, já a com a noiva, foi avermelhada para então depois ser azul com o irmão.
E por último, o golpe final, mais uma vez ignorando a existência do outro, se entregou e deu de cara com a realidade.
Talvez a noiva tenha entendido, visto, sentido, afinal de contas, a minha interpretação com a legenda dizendo: "O que você acha da sua cunhada?... Vamos parar por aqui... Eu realmente a amo..." foi a confirmação que Gushan já sentia desde que ela chegou, já que há nitidamente um pequeno salto na linha do tempo para a venda da casa ter sido efetiva. O que Gushan aguentou nestes dias? Não sabemos, mas ele sentiu...

Yuewen usou os sentimentos dele para saber como proceder, isso foi explícito.
Gushan então murchou...

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