Now I just have to ask, why do people have a problem when ML walks away and leaves the young man to a bunch of…
thank you! i really appreciate this exchange too. it’s rare to have a respectful conversation about something this heavy, especially online.
and actually, reading your comment reminded me that i did watch history 4…partially. the stepbrothers made me so uncomfortable that i skipped all their scenes, so i really feel you on that. it was definitely too real in a way that wasn’t easy to sit with
Now I just have to ask, why do people have a problem when ML walks away and leaves the young man to a bunch of…
i understand where you’re coming from. honestly, thinking about it, this is such a nuanced topic, but i’ll try to explain my point of view a bit more.
first, i agree that physical violence can absolutely take away a person’s dignity, autonomy, and sense of safety. any kind of violence can be incredibly traumatic. but for many, rape, especially gang rape, is different. it’s a deeply personal violation of bodily autonomy, often leaving behind long-term psychological wounds that get triggered again and again in moments that should feel safe, like intimacy, trust, or sex.
rape also carries a unique social burden: the shame, disbelief, victim blaming, and stigma that so many survivors face. those added layers make it a distinctly isolating kind of trauma, one that’s different from other forms of violence. and while i absolutely respect your experience with the people you know, it’s worth pointing out that statistically, rape is significantly more likely to lead to ptsd than any other form of violence or trauma. recovery is absolutely possible, and many people do heal, but the rates of long-term ptsd, struggles with self-worth, and difficulty forming healthy attachments are higher among rape survivors than among other trauma survivors. i think that’s important to acknowledge and can shine light on why not everyone perceives all violence as equal
as a queer woman, i absolutely agree that boys, especially queer boys, face very real threats of sexual violence too, and that fear is completely valid. but it’s also true that under a patriarchal society, that threat and fear is especially pervasive for women. like 1 in 3 women (depends on the country) experience sexual violence. and given that, like i said before, the majority of bl watchers are women, it makes sense why that scene, as unambiguous and glaringly sexually violent as it was, would trigger stronger backlash than with physical violence. it feels more immediate, much more personal. i’m not saying physical violence is okay. i do think there’s a conversation to be had about the normalization of all violence in media, but im explaining the reaction ppl are having to this violence.
i didn’t watch history 4 (i think? they all blend together), so i can’t speak to that storyline or how it affected you, but i totally respect that it crossed a line and felt too real. for me, the gang rape scene did the same. having the guy scream for help, the sound of belt buckles, even in a mafia context, it felt realistic in a deeply uncomfortable way to me
Now I just have to ask, why do people have a problem when ML walks away and leaves the young man to a bunch of…
gang rape crosses a line that murder or physical violence doesn’t. killing or beating someone is brutal, but straight up rape is a different kind of cruelty. it’s not just about pain. it’s about stripping someone of their dignity, autonomy, and sense of safety in their own body. it’s invasive in a way that lingers long after injuries heal. death is final (by definition) but rape trauma stays with survivors, and it can fracture someone’s entire sense of self. in our society, especially for women, that fear is constant. women are taught from a young age to fear sexual violence, in public, in private, from strangers, from people they trust, so it hits way closer to home, and honestly, the majority of bl viewers are women. it makes sense that this would feel instinctively unforgivable to so many of us. when a character chooses gang rape, even as revenge, especially when they could’ve just beaten or killed the guy, it doesn’t feel like standard mob brutality anymore. it feels sick.
personally, i’ve chosen to try and forget that scene even existed, but i won’t gault anyone for not being able to do the same.
i have beef with guo cheng bcs why the fuck would you betray your childhood best friend like that 😭 i’m side eyeing him so hard rn. i wonder if there will be an explanation about what the hell he was thinking. i do have to admit i find him kinda funny tho. he tries to be all suave and seductive but he’s kinda a loser 😭 like wdym you sent and unsent a thirst trap for attention AND made up having a whole department at work to impress a boy you like
tbh even if they didn’t kiss on the mouth i don’t think it would be queer bait. chi cheng has had sexual relationships with men and is actively pursing a relationship with wsw. that’s the whole plot rn. the doctor is gay and they talk about that explicitly. there’s no teasing but refusing to deliver queerness. it’s right there
On gaga the subtitles are alot more accuarte because they translated it right there, same with the scene at the…
i was gonna buy a gaga subscription to watch the new ep but the site kept crashing lmao. everybody and their mama was trying to watch the new ep at the same time i guess
apparently (according to tiktok) when they were biking in the field chi cheng said “you brought me here to have public sex with you?” not “field exercise” like in the subs😭 it genuinely amuses me how bad he wants wu suo wei’s cookie
oh good on them for making the membership pretty reasonable. 8 eps a month for only $2cad is fair. i really like watching shit on my phone so $2 is was worth the convenience of avoiding pop up ads, plus it shows support.
K-Drama 
and actually, reading your comment reminded me that i did watch history 4…partially. the stepbrothers made me so uncomfortable that i skipped all their scenes, so i really feel you on that. it was definitely too real in a way that wasn’t easy to sit with
anyway, have a good day? night? lol
first, i agree that physical violence can absolutely take away a person’s dignity, autonomy, and sense of safety. any kind of violence can be incredibly traumatic. but for many, rape, especially gang rape, is different. it’s a deeply personal violation of bodily autonomy, often leaving behind long-term psychological wounds that get triggered again and again in moments that should feel safe, like intimacy, trust, or sex.
rape also carries a unique social burden: the shame, disbelief, victim blaming, and stigma that so many survivors face. those added layers make it a distinctly isolating kind of trauma, one that’s different from other forms of violence. and while i absolutely respect your experience with the people you know, it’s worth pointing out that statistically, rape is significantly more likely to lead to ptsd than any other form of violence or trauma. recovery is absolutely possible, and many people do heal, but the rates of long-term ptsd, struggles with self-worth, and difficulty forming healthy attachments are higher among rape survivors than among other trauma survivors. i think that’s important to acknowledge and can shine light on why not everyone perceives all violence as equal
as a queer woman, i absolutely agree that boys, especially queer boys, face very real threats of sexual violence too, and that fear is completely valid. but it’s also true that under a patriarchal society, that threat and fear is especially pervasive for women. like 1 in 3 women (depends on the country) experience sexual violence. and given that, like i said before, the majority of bl watchers are women, it makes sense why that scene, as unambiguous and glaringly sexually violent as it was, would trigger stronger backlash than with physical violence. it feels more immediate, much more personal. i’m not saying physical violence is okay. i do think there’s a conversation to be had about the normalization of all violence in media, but im explaining the reaction ppl are having to this violence.
i didn’t watch history 4 (i think? they all blend together), so i can’t speak to that storyline or how it affected you, but i totally respect that it crossed a line and felt too real. for me, the gang rape scene did the same. having the guy scream for help, the sound of belt buckles, even in a mafia context, it felt realistic in a deeply uncomfortable way to me
personally, i’ve chosen to try and forget that scene even existed, but i won’t gault anyone for not being able to do the same.