MiHnn

Does this show have a similar feel to that of Reply 1988?

There was definitely a power imbalance in all three relationships for sure. There was one dominant and one submissive, who did everything to please the dominant. And you're right, the only person who walked away was Kang Gun. And he basically told her to sort herself out and he'll be there if she ever does.

The love Jae Won had for Eun Oh is 100% fictional. It's very rare for a person to have that much unconditional love for a partner. A parent to a child, yes, it's possible. But that level of unconditional love we call unhealthy in real life.

At least their story is over, so we can move on. lol.

It's just another kdrama that had a lively debate while it was relevant.

In your own words...

"in conditional love, people oftentimes feel a lack of stability and trust. Moreover, they may feel like they have to mold who they are and what they do around someone else in order to continue receiving love."

This was the most prevailing quality of Eun Oh's and Jae Won's relationship from the beginning of the show. We have not seen unconditional love from Eun Oh throughout the series, even though we've seen Jae Won's unconditional love.

You mentioned that 5 minute conversation at the end, but that is not enough to show unconditional love, especially because the person Eun Oh is asking to take her on is someone who anyway loves her unconditionally.

If Jae Won hadn't already loved her unconditionally, they wouldn't have ended up together because Eun Oh gives her love conditionally. She calls the shots in the relationship. Everything has to go according to how she wants it (the relationship, the break up, the make up, she makes the decision without consulting him) and Jae Won says yes to everything because he craves her love. The fact that he lets her do anything is a sign of conditional love, because unconditional love both ways is more of a partnership, rather than following along with whatever your partner decides. But the fact that he's afraid of losing her if he doesn't conform and give her what she wants... It just proves that Eun Oh's love is conditional.

"They are going slow... Learning and dating."

As you said, their real relationship just started (because Eun Oh's real personality was just revealed to him), so could you really call a relationship that just started unconditional from both parties?

Eun Oh is conditional though. So my point still stands because their relationship includes both of them, not just Jae Won.

I agree that there is a double standard by some. Just as there are people who see the problems between Eun Oh and Jae Won's relationship, there are people who find it romantic and cute, just like in Well-intended love.

I'm curious to see what you think once you finish the drama. Personally, I'm not fond of the direction they went with at the end, but that's because I hate seeing people go back to someone that treated them badly and Jae Won's obsessiveness rubbed me the wrong way.

"Bridgerton is also now the most viewed Netflix original. So that tells me it's not "some people", but most people."

Maybe. Neither of us have stats regarding that. Fifty Shades of Grey and Twilight have problematic relationships and they were popular, but a lot of people watched them to see what the fuss is about, only to criticize it mercilessly. And years later, it's finally seen as problematic.

There are plenty of people who are romantics and who will watch Lovestruck and think their relationship is romantic just like Boys Over Flowers and Well-Intended Love. It's just who they are as people.

You just described all of the three main relationships in this show. Conditional love indeed.

This is THAT show. That show that takes a tired plot we've seen a million times and delves deeply into the wounds so that we don't brush it off like it's another plot device.

I would have loved this show if they focused on Eun Oh growing as person, who learns self-respect and self love, and if Jae Won learned that it was okay to move on instead of pining for someone who treated him badly.

I have, actually. Because to me, gender doesn't matter half as much as a character's journey.

Itaewon Class, all I wanted to see was a redeeming storyline for Soo Ah. After Sae Ro Yi, she was the one I cared about the most. And I was happy with the outcome. On the other side of the spectrum was Was It Love? which had the chance of a redeeming main female character, but she didn't change at all and remained problematic until the end. So no character development there.

And for context:

"I keep hoping for a redeeming storyline because of their looks."

I was referencing shows like Psychopath Diary and Uncanny Counter. I would never, in a million years, ship these characters with anyone no matter how good looking they are. Yuck.

I disagree with this. Eun Oh is basically Big from Sex and the City while Jae Won is Carrie (with a little bit of Grease thrown in), which is why people won't be shipping them if the genders were reverse. They forgive Eun On easily because she's a woman. If she was a man, he would be a douche playboy. They find Jae Won sweet for not being able to move on after being treated badly because he's a man. If he was a woman, she would be pathetic.

"When I pointed it out, tons of people made excuses for him and continued to ship him with the female lead."

I've noticed the same. I rated dramas low for main leads who gaslight their partners lower than average and have people defend them both. (Eg:- Was it Love? - The main female lead was problematic and people defended her, Well-Intended Love - The main male lead was the most toxic person ever, but people defended him.)

"But you have people fangirling over male leads who are horrible...in 2021."

The majority have moved on and want healthy relationships, while there are still some people who enjoy the Bridgeton level problematic relationships and call it romantic. They want a HEA and call this fictional so it's okay.

I've seen people in this exact same relationship with Eun Oh's issues and Jae Won's obsessiveness and it's not romantic or cute. It's cringe-worthy.

Right??? And it's all because they cast good looking actors. Just like the psychopath murderers in kdramas these days... Why are they so good looking when they are pure evil? I keep hoping for a redeeming storyline because of their looks.

"How many times have we all watched dramas where the male lead has acted exactly like her? Where they push the female lead away and make bad decisions, because they don’t think they’re worthy of her. "

Exactly! We have seen this same plot a million times, which is why this is not a novel story, while the execution is definitely a creative one that has also been done before (eg:- The Producers).

I do completely agree that there is a double standard with viewers because if the genders were reversed, no one would be shipping these two, because of how problematic their relationship is these days. Had it come out in early 2000s (like Boys Over Flowers, Cheese in the Trap), this show would not have had the criticisms it currently has, but with the #metoo movement people are no longer happy seeing couples getting together after one party gets mistreated by the other. Kdramas have started moving away from that trope with kind and understanding main and second leads, which is why it's disappointing that this show has taken a step back. Ten years back, to be honest.

Haha. I felt the same.

The biggest thing that's missing in all of these relationships: communication. Mostly by the women. They expect the men to just know what they're feeling at all times. Yikes.

Haha. Unless the drama focuses on mental issues... None.

I hope so. I really hope they don't cop out at the end and show a time jump where they've both learned to deal and now they are ready for a relationship.

It makes me cringe

For me, the acting is the best aspect of the show. Second is the cinematography and feel of it. Usually, I'm a sucker for shows like this one, but I found myself skipping scenes and increasing the speed quite a bit as the show went on. If I didn't, it took me a week to finish one episode. I think the writing is what didn't work for me. So much of the show had no direction. It's good to watch if you have nothing else to watch and I couldn't care less about the characters and their journeys. And honestly, it's a very forgettable show to me. If they go their separate way, I'll probably give a 8 (depending on the ending). If they do end up together, a 6.5.

If this show ends with Jae Won and Eun Oh going their separate ways with absolutely no hint of getting together in the future, I just might give this show an extra point, even though I was bored through most of it.

Yes! If they went along with a similar story to 500 Days of Summer, this show would have been great. Even with all the controversy, the show is quite boring tbh.