Duel on Mount Hua: Southern Emperor and Northern Beggar
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by MyLangyaList
This review may contain spoilers
华山论贱: Southern Cuckoo and Northern Coo-Coo
‒Review‒
It's another installment of 华山论贱 Shitfest at Mount Hua, and this time we have another very earthy flavored creation, one that somehow tricked me into finishing. Disclaimer: in many ways the Shitfest at Mount Hua is still better than the Idolxias, so if you didn't grow up with Wuxia, these might even be a pleasant surprise to you. But I did grow up w/ wuxia, so woe is me.
So how did I finish this when I dropped the others a few episodes in? It's mostly because it was kookie and silly enough in the beginning and didn't try to present itself as something too serious. It's more permissible for fratboy retards to get all shitfaced and shit in their retard friend's baseball cap than it is to shit in their professor's briefcase during thesis defense. Same logic. (Though I hear everyone is Cheat-gpting and getting grade inflationed, so maybe both are now a celebrated tradition in American higher education).
Anyways, back to the show. There's some father-son drama in the posh Dali Kingdom in the South. It's supposed to be an ancient kingdom but the aesthetics is blindingly white and ostentatious. It's as if Donald Trump got 'donated' a Saudi prince's palace, took out the only classy elements, renovated it loud Trump style, then asked his buddy Epstein to put some creepy finishing touches on it. Every time they show a shot of the palace is like checking into Dali Trump Resorts. The only thing missing is half of US Congress and an adolescent masseuse team. No this is not why I kept watching you sickos.
Luckily the characters are nothing of the Epstein Congress variety. Peter Ho plays the prince that ran away from a marriage pact to join the Hobo Fight Club‒I'm not kidding it's literally a fight club of hobos, and it's canon. And Ming Dao plays a hobo-trainee that got swapped with Peter, tries to fend off a bunch of women from different tribes who tries to marry/kiss/kill him. Yes they ran a kiss/marry/kill game on the same guy. And somehow he ends up winning the heart of the arranged princess (played by Hankiz Omar) despite his protestations. Now both Peter Ho and Ming Dao have their fans, and they are not bad actors. The problem is that both are playing characters that are 25 years younger. So you look at them and expect some mature wisdom. But instead you get retarded decision making and behaviors emblematic of teenagers with underdeveloped prefrontal cortex. Whoops they are 45 and 49? I swear they are not Epstein-congressional!!
They are just into different things. Peter (Southern Emperor) ends up falling for Hani (Yi Huo) and marries her, but later reluctantly and gentlemanly gives her up to Ming Dao (Northern Begger). Because they are friends and that's what good friends do. But then you remember that Southern Emperor will later marry another woman in LoCH and she ends up cheating with chubby Zhou Botong. Hmmm, hmmm, very sus ... as they say in Jianghu, once is an accident, twice makes a fetish. Our Southern Emperor is so obviously a cuckoo enthusiast that he should be made an honorary White person.
Our Northern Emperor has a different fetish, of the coo-coo variety. He just gets off on doing clearly stupid and crazy things. Obvious scheme, let's fall for it! Suspicious dude, let's trust him! Suspicious dude second time, let's leave him alive to do evil deeds. I will fight my bro Northern Emperor because of mah woman and mah Dad, but casually let evil dude jeopardize their lives. Granted most of the stupidity was concentrated in the last 2 episodes, but boy did it culminate in a scatological volcano.
At least it's not Epstein.
--Category Ratings--
- Overall - 5.5
- Plot - 5.5
- Theme / Concept / Impact - 6
- Acting - 7.5
- Visuals - 8
- Audio / Music - 8
- Rewatch - 4
- Cultural/Topical Accessibility - 7.5
- Subtitle quality - 8
It's another installment of 华山论贱 Shitfest at Mount Hua, and this time we have another very earthy flavored creation, one that somehow tricked me into finishing. Disclaimer: in many ways the Shitfest at Mount Hua is still better than the Idolxias, so if you didn't grow up with Wuxia, these might even be a pleasant surprise to you. But I did grow up w/ wuxia, so woe is me.
So how did I finish this when I dropped the others a few episodes in? It's mostly because it was kookie and silly enough in the beginning and didn't try to present itself as something too serious. It's more permissible for fratboy retards to get all shitfaced and shit in their retard friend's baseball cap than it is to shit in their professor's briefcase during thesis defense. Same logic. (Though I hear everyone is Cheat-gpting and getting grade inflationed, so maybe both are now a celebrated tradition in American higher education).
Anyways, back to the show. There's some father-son drama in the posh Dali Kingdom in the South. It's supposed to be an ancient kingdom but the aesthetics is blindingly white and ostentatious. It's as if Donald Trump got 'donated' a Saudi prince's palace, took out the only classy elements, renovated it loud Trump style, then asked his buddy Epstein to put some creepy finishing touches on it. Every time they show a shot of the palace is like checking into Dali Trump Resorts. The only thing missing is half of US Congress and an adolescent masseuse team. No this is not why I kept watching you sickos.
Luckily the characters are nothing of the Epstein Congress variety. Peter Ho plays the prince that ran away from a marriage pact to join the Hobo Fight Club‒I'm not kidding it's literally a fight club of hobos, and it's canon. And Ming Dao plays a hobo-trainee that got swapped with Peter, tries to fend off a bunch of women from different tribes who tries to marry/kiss/kill him. Yes they ran a kiss/marry/kill game on the same guy. And somehow he ends up winning the heart of the arranged princess (played by Hankiz Omar) despite his protestations. Now both Peter Ho and Ming Dao have their fans, and they are not bad actors. The problem is that both are playing characters that are 25 years younger. So you look at them and expect some mature wisdom. But instead you get retarded decision making and behaviors emblematic of teenagers with underdeveloped prefrontal cortex. Whoops they are 45 and 49? I swear they are not Epstein-congressional!!
They are just into different things. Peter (Southern Emperor) ends up falling for Hani (Yi Huo) and marries her, but later reluctantly and gentlemanly gives her up to Ming Dao (Northern Begger). Because they are friends and that's what good friends do. But then you remember that Southern Emperor will later marry another woman in LoCH and she ends up cheating with chubby Zhou Botong. Hmmm, hmmm, very sus ... as they say in Jianghu, once is an accident, twice makes a fetish. Our Southern Emperor is so obviously a cuckoo enthusiast that he should be made an honorary White person.
Our Northern Emperor has a different fetish, of the coo-coo variety. He just gets off on doing clearly stupid and crazy things. Obvious scheme, let's fall for it! Suspicious dude, let's trust him! Suspicious dude second time, let's leave him alive to do evil deeds. I will fight my bro Northern Emperor because of mah woman and mah Dad, but casually let evil dude jeopardize their lives. Granted most of the stupidity was concentrated in the last 2 episodes, but boy did it culminate in a scatological volcano.
At least it's not Epstein.
--Category Ratings--
- Overall - 5.5
- Plot - 5.5
- Theme / Concept / Impact - 6
- Acting - 7.5
- Visuals - 8
- Audio / Music - 8
- Rewatch - 4
- Cultural/Topical Accessibility - 7.5
- Subtitle quality - 8
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