PrettyCarEye

'Most kids in their 20s really know what they're doing.'

This should be:

Most kids in their 20s really DON'T know what they're doing ...

I think we women are great at doubting our abilities. I also think that while we (that’s you & me) realize the error of our youthful ways now, we're not that much different from everyone else. Most kids in their 20s really know what they're doing. Believe me, not even Mark Zuckerberg who is already a billionaire & set for life. I'm sure when he too gets to his 30s he'll think back & have some regrets over things he wished he'd done differently.

Have a look at this article. Ahjussi sent it to me one day. It's from a men's website, but is applicable to everyone regardless of gender.

www.knowledgeformen.com/10-reasons-why-no-one-knows-what-theyre-doing-in-their-20s/

Although when you pass 30 you gain a new perspective, we're still young. We're simply wiser to the fact that we need to use our time better. We can still try and pursue whatever it is that truly make us happy, whether that’s motherhood or career or both.

I know in America, our government and our culture don’t make it easy on parents, especially mothers. You seem to have what appears to be a secure job with the postal service, though, so you can still pursue your drawing & have financial security. And when the kids come along hopefully your circumstances allow you to continue pursuing the things that brings you personal joy. And let me just say ... the arts entertain/can stimulate the mind, but technical knowledge makes the world function. I wish I had a more practical calling in this regard. Like I wish I had the knowledge, skill and interest to be a mechanic like you or an engineer like Ahjussi. I love the arts, but I wish I didn't. Does that makes sense? Girl of contradiction! lol

You’re right, though, being a mother is not a priority. I don’t know if it ever will be. I like kids and sometimes I envision myself being a mother yelling at my brood, but in general I feel inadequate and lack the confidence to be solely responsible for another human being. And it’s not entirely for selfish reasons. Another thing is I don’t want to be a middle - aged mother with kids who are really young so I can’t see myself having a child at 40 or older. More power to the women who choose this path, but it doesn’t seem like the right one for me. If I’m blessed with life beyond 35 and there are still no children it’ll probably stay that way. I also know if I live to see old age having never had children I most likely I regret it. It's a regret I’m bracing myself to have already at this point.

'I think my whole life I have been very naive of the world in the sense that I was always thinking "there is time" and "there is time" became my nightmare.'

Another thing we have in common! I could've gotten a lot farther in my career had I used my 20s more wisely. I did a lot of fun stuff like travelling, trying different vocations, adventure sports etc, but none of these activities contributed a thing to building a secure future for myself. I've always wanted to be that woman who didn't have to financially depend on a man. I wanted, and still want to be, like Chanel. That woman, in her independence, is like an icon to me. But I was too busy having fun.

I look at people my age or younger who've accomplished far more than I have - they've made their first feature or they've been invited to Cannes (I mean I've been to Cannes, but not with a movie). And I can't help but feel like a loser in that I epitomize the term 'late bloomer'! haha
I seem to do everything a decade later than everyone else. Of course that feeling comes for a split second & then I squelch it because comparing yourself to others is a fool’s pastime. Instead I work hard on getting the next flick made & take things one day as they come. I have to believe my time will appear on the horizon.

Coffee, where you at? How's Rich Man, Poor Woman going? Have you ever heard a more uninspired name for a TV show? lol

Cheers :)

In Asia, Jung Kyung Ho has certainly caught my attention, but he's the only one. So far. I'm hoping to discover more soon. And gladly female actors that blow my mind. I still haven't found a bonafide Asian favourite.

As for Joo Jin Mo ... the eyes, yes! And even when he's playing really badass characters there's always this underlying vulnerability to his performances that I find very captivating.

HJW & Kim Ha Neul ... they both have a very over the top way of expressing emotions. Even softer ones such as compassion or love. I can't bear to watch them. Kim Ha Neul almost drove me crazy in A Gentleman's Dignity.

When it comes to Ha, only exception was Closer to Heaven when her approach to the character was so calm and understated. I didn't love her there either, but I didn't hate her.

Noooo, you're not crazy at all. I totally agree with you about the lack of young male talent in the West! A lot of eye candy actors flooded the market in the last years, but they bring very little substance to the table. Case in point, Chris Hemsworth. Gosh, I love looking at that guy (I mean, those pecs ... omiiii), but his 'acting' is seriously painful to watch. Thor & Cabin in the Woods (hated that movie, btw) ... never again!

So no, all my fav male actors from the West have remained the same for as long as I can remember. Daniel Day Lewis, Denzel, Liam Neeson, Tom Wilkinson, Anthony Hopkins. Within the last decade Christian Bale, Chewitel Eijofor (his name is so cool!), Javier Bardem (but even these guys are already 40 or over). Within the last 5 yrs, Michael Fassbender. Hunger & Shame, wow! :) I believe director Steve McQueen really make him shine. Shia The Beef seems to be taking some interesting risks of late - looking forward to his role in von Trier's decadent 'Nymphomaniac'. I'm keeping an eye on him. Aside from those 2 no male actor of my generation has caught my attention in the last years.

But young women have been making strides ... which is always great. Jennifer Lawrence, Nicole Beharie, Noomi Rapace ... heck even Vera Farmiga though she's been around for a while (I absolutely love her!).

My issue is more with the Hong sisters rather than the drama itself. I think they're good at comedy & their shows appeal to the romantics in us (esp us women, their main target), but I don't think they're good writers overall. I find that they have issues with story development & pace. A lot of time their dramas are good for the 1st 10 - 12 eps but draaaaag thereafter because they keep repeating the same tropes over and over. Usually it's the heroine holding out on the hero when such behaviour doesn't make sense in the context of their relationship. I actually dropped The Greatest Love for several months before completing it. By ep 11 I was irritated at Gu Ae Jang because she clearly was in love with Dokko, but she kept pushing him away for reasons I couldn't understand. Of course this was just so the Hongs had something to write about for the remaining 5 eps. Total cop out, imo! ;)

Feeds ... because it's easier to have just one reference point.

Thank you, mr. Knight! :)

Ahh ... tell me about it!
Feminism has taken on its own cloak of 'patriarchy', insisting that 'strong' women can only act one way (and never in need of help from a man). I've always rejected that notion, hence my contention with the modern movement. Anyway, while I had other issues with the show it certainly had nothing to do with the personality of the characters.

It's uncanny how we have a similar approach to things! I've been having the same casual conversation with ahjussi over the last few years. I say casual because we never came right out and say okay we're doing this! But I've always had 35 as my cut off age too. I said to myself if the ninos don't start popping out before that they ain't popping out at all. Of course as you said nothing in life goes according to plan.

As for my career I've thought about quitting many times since I have a business degree which would probably make my life easier, but doing what I do brings me so much joy. Creating things make me happy, discovering new talent makes me happy. I'm always working because my job doesn't feel like work. When I'm at a festival screening a film or just participating in industry events being with so many people who share my passion for cinema feels very empowering. So for now quitting isn't an option. I earn enough to contribute to the household, though it's ahjussi's salary that provides us with a comfortable lifestyle. I don't feel guilty because I've supported him in everything that he's ever wanted to do thus far. It's all about give & take.

Moreover, filmmaking is a tough business no matter where you go, but I've made strides in this country (where filmmaking is concerned) that I know I wouldn't have made back in the states. The Scandinavian welfare state, you know ...

There's lots of opportunities for public funding & earning supplementary income doing related side work. So even though it's cutthroat & I still fit into the box of 'struggling artist' I'm able to stay afloat. I believe my contribution to cinema is worth something, esp on this side of the world where people are so insular, so I wanna try a little longer and see what happens. :)

P.S. check out my post on the feeds & post something. Here's your opportunity to be a good dongsæng! ;)

A woman's work is never done! I thought your pops had already returned to Cuba.
Be careful what you wish for, chingu. Though they're bound to appear at some point, kids can be a handful. Far beyond anything we ever anticipated.
Somedays I find myself entertaining thoughts of having kids. I mean ahjussi isn't getting any younger since he's already close to 40. And well, neither am I! I can't believe in little over 2 weeks I'll be 31. In my head I still feel 21.
Anyway, on other days just the very thought of having kids is enough to make me break out in a cold sweat. I'm a big 'freedom' person & kids would definitely put a stopper on that. Moreover, my career choice requires me to be flexible about a lot of things, 1 of the most important being income. Navigating independent filmmaking does not a millionaire make! :p
I'm sorry you can't get to sleep, chingu. Sending you some cuddles. Keeps you warm at least! :)

Yeah, yeah, yeah ... whatever you say ... player! :p

And pfft, that's no excuse, I don't accept it. But I won't argue the point. Whatever is keeping you busy but free (that sounds like exams), fighting! :)

Hehe, mentioning the character's psychopathy or lack thereof has nothing to do with you saying he was psychopathic. Nowhere in my posts did I say you said he was psychopathic. What I did say is that I construed your opinion of him as excessively negative ... which is more or less the truth, isn't it? At the beginning of the discussion at least...

Anyway, the comment (and the reference article) was just to compound my own interpretation/understanding of the characters. Like I've said, I view TJ in the context of his situation (& my general knowledge of a cutthroat business environment ... given that I work in one). I also view him in comparison to the other players who happen to be on the end of both extremes, imo. Min-jæ who is clearly psychopathic & Seo Yoon who clearly isn't. Then you have TJ who is neither nor.

ms. Nina-ssi, I've responded to your post on the discussion thread! :p

Well if you're living with them they're both your wives aren't they? So yeah, player ... player!
You can't fool this noona, arasso? Acting all innocent & things ... cham!

What you been up to otherwise? So if I don't come give you a shout you don't come see me, huh? That's how you roll? I told you I'mma come to India & whop your bahind. You think I'm joking...

From your lists, including your favs. I saw a lot of wuxia & martial arts flicks so I just assumed it was a major preference. What other genres do you enjoy for movies & drama?

Love your review of The Greatest Love. Aside from your second male syndrome, you expressed my feelings about the show exactly! Especially what you said about Dokko Jin & Gu Ae Jang's personality. I always make the point that just because a hero helps out his heroine doesn't mean she's weak!
So really thank you! :)