PrettyCarEye

My comment wasn't in reference to the drama, but to those, aside from myself, responding to your comment. And yes, there is a lot of things I'm too smart for ... glad you noticed.

Has she ever confronted him about his behaviour?

Fighting, kid.

Original concept (which is why I looked forward to watching), but totally koreanized in all the worse ways. That basically means piss poor execution of story & plot, your usual overused drama tropes like the unnecessary (not to mention damn annoying) love triangle, fake romance (the extent of which consists of the leads not having feelings for each other, then claiming to not be aware of or denying their feelings for each other so as to delay the advancement of the romantic arc - oh, where have we seen that before?), fake kissing - if any kissing at all; rushed, underdeveloped storytelling so everything becomes a mess ... and the list goes on. I liked that the drama was basically a parody of itself, and the ridiculousness of Kdramas in general with all their dumb cliches & cheesiness, but I need more than cheap laughs to keep me invested. Total waste of (my) time. 4/10

Don't waste your time on that idiot. Not worth it.

Thank youuuuuu! You're the best! <3

Hey, how are we coming along with the subs for ep 10? All done?
And most importantly, are you going to reupload to YouTube or somewhere else? Please let us know where we can watch. Thanks! :-)

Hahaha! Crazy ...

I tend to agree with you. Their problems were mostly internal. Kumiko's condition was very likely a psychological block stemming from a traumatic event in her childhood, so some sort of psycho-sexual counseling would've been in order.

I think subconsciously she disassociates sex & love. Prior to meeting Ken, she has only ever had negative exposure to sex, both from her own experience & from what she observed around her at school & home. Remember she said her mom & dad hated each other, but they had lots of sex. Maybe subconsciously she felt if she and Ken enjoyed a robust sex life, they'd grow to hate each other like her parents? Given the complicated relationship she had with her mother, I can see this taking root in her mind, irrational as it is.

She was also privy to the destructive sexual lifestyle of Miyuki's mother, which had an adverse effect on the kid's behaviour. Kumiko sees a bit of herself in Miyuki, once again reinforcing her negative perception that sex is dirty & destructive. Moreover, all the men she ended up sleeping with were total weirdos. She's literally never seen or experienced anything positive about sex.

Therefore, in her subconscious mind, sex is a threat to her relationship with Ken, a man who means the world to her. Every time they attempt to have sex, her subconscious mind goes into panic mode (out of fear of losing him), causing the condition to manifest itself.

On the other hand, when she engages in anonymous sex, only her physical self is present (not her emotional & spiritual self), so there's no anxiety & the sex act can proceed.

I definitely think counseling and tantric sex training could have helped them get over this problem and save them a whole lot of unnecessary grief & pain! I agree with you that they didn't try hard enough to get to the bottom of it at all. This was a big minus in the drama for me, but I also boiled it down to the them being rather sheltered and unworldly, esp living in rural Japan, where everything regarding sexual matters is very hush hush.

Completely agree with you! Of course he will continue to go to brothels. He's a young man in his prime! I don't believe for a minute that sex isn't & will continue to be important to him. That's why I wanted them to have a conversation about how they will deal with their sexual urges moving forward? Were they going to have sex with other people? Were they going to keep trying medically to see if she can be cured? I needed more clarity on how they intended to navigate that aspect of their lives. Sadly we didn't get it. I take his 'sex is not love' mantra to mean that they shouldn't break up simply because they can't have sex with each other. Their love for each other transcends physical pleasure and is far more pure & divine than their baser instincts. After all, sex, in his opinion, is only a function for reproduction & or a human itch that can not be controlled or ignored, and must therefore be scratched (even when you know you shouldn't). I think that's how he rationalized his cheating in his head. I also think he's still trying to convince himself that this is truly what he believes.

I'm not sure when this was set, probably not in 2019. I believe I read somewhere that the events of drama are set sometime in the early 2000s, in one of Japan's more rural prefectures. Also don't forget Kumiko is a country bumpkin. She was brought up very sheltered and she's shy and introverted. There's also the cultural aspect regarding sexual matters, esp in rural Japan ... everything's kept very hush hush. Finally, while Japan is considered quite technologically advanced, that technological advancement doesn't always extend to every day life. The fax machine is still a thing in Japan today. In some rural prefectures they still use typewriters, instead of computers. Don't like cash? You'll be in trouble in Japan because most places don't accept credit cards, even in big cities. So perhaps it's not so odd that she didn't know what lube was? I also wondered why anal was never mentioned (even if they ultimately chose not to go that route). Ken is from Tokyo, where all kinds of kinky sh-- go down, so I'm sure he would've been aware of it as an alternative to vaginal sex. Maybe in Japan anal sex is solely associated with homosexuality & therefore not seen as an option for a straight couple ...? I'm just guessing here, but I think if it was an option for Ken, he would have mentioned it. He wasn't shy about leading Kumiko in the bedroom ... or out of it.

Finally, Kumiko's character. I understand she's an introverted country girl who's led a very sheltered life ... but her passivity can be somewhat frustrating. A lot of times she just blindly follows Ken's lead. I don't have a problem with him being the leader & the 'head' of his & Kumi's household, but when he makes decisions without asking her opinion - like when he decided pretty much on his own that they were going to get married, when he decided to ask her parents for her hand in marriage (even though she wanted to elope), when he told her they don't need sex to be happy or that they don't need kids to be happy ... among other things, it would've been nice if she asserted herself just a bit here & let Ken know how she truly feels. It was clear she didn't always see things the same way he did. But did she ever speak up? No. Did she once ever try to impose her opinion? No. She just kinda accepted what came her way or whatever Ken decided. While Ken is a caring husband who always means well, I just wish she would've spoken up more. She left too many things unsaid and it caused unnecessary complications & grief in the marriage that she could've easily avoided (for eg, both his & her cheating).

Secondly, they BOTH wanted and longed for children. That scene when Ken was home with his family, his mother expressed shock when he said he didn't want kids because he had always loved kids. Then when his sister's baby started kicking, you could see the look of envy on his face & in his body language. Kumiko too was envious of her sisters who were both pregnant. Then, in the last episode she said that she didn't want sour grapes, and even if there were sweet ones she still wouldn't want them. I take that to mean that even if she could have children, at this point in her life & marriage, she no longer wanted them. Lies. I don't believe her for a minute. She was regretful of the fact that she's going into early menopause and any chance of her ever having children would soon be gone forever.

These aren't small issues. These are big deal issues that can, and have torn, strong(er) couples apart so I'm just afraid suppressing these deep desires, keeping them from each other, will cause cracks & resentments to appear further on down the line, no matter that they've been together for 20 yrs & are still happy together now.

The leads started to communicate a little better than they did at the start of their relationship, but I still felt like they weren't completely truthful with themselves or each other to the very end. TOO much was still left unsaid, like the fact that while 'sex is not love', they did not acknowledge (at least not to each other) that sex still IS important. It's the reason why Kenichi frequented those brothels. He does want sex. Sex IS important to him. Of course it is! He's a young man in his prime. It's not a plausible option that, after their reconciliation, he's now suddenly lost all interest in sex.

As for Kumi, sex didn't seem to be as important to her. She'd always had a bad view of sex, but she wanted to please her husband sexually. That's why she agonized so much over the fact that he couldn't fit. When she started running around with those random guys she didn't seem to enjoy the encounters. Feeling rejected (because of Kenichi's cheating) and defective, the sex for her was all about trying to fill the void she felt inside, while for Ken it was a physical release he needed. When she realized that sleeping around didn't fill the void & just made her feel worse, she stopped. But will Ken stop going to brothels to get his sexual release? I don't think so.

I needed them to have a conversation about how they would deal with their physical urges moving forward. Does 'sex is not love' mean they would sleep with other people? What about trying other sexual options, such as anal? Kumi's condition was very likely a psychological block stemming from a traumatic event in her childhood, what about some sort of psycho-sexual counseling? Moreover, why on earth would you go to the doctor and NOT tell the doctor the REAL problem???? Ok, it's fine to get confirmation that their reproductive systems are in working order, but THAT was not the real issue! The real issue was that he couldn't fit!
Talk to the doctor about THAT, not some unrelated issue ... wtf! Frustrating...!!!

I liked it more than I thought I would, but less than I wanted to. In a lot of ways, though, it's a drama that's right up my street! A unique story about the ups & downs of marriage, how to overcome them & build a strong bond with your spouse. Loved the mature atmosphere of the drama (nothing cheesy or too sugary here), loved the romance (simple, sweet & heartfelt as only the Japanese can make it), the strong connection between the couple, the realistic sexual intimacy. Ain't no fish kissing or lip brushing here, folks! There's even nekkid breasts and butts too. If yah don't like that kinda thing in yah dramas, you better run! Now, it does have some flaws (some of which I discuss in the spoilers below), but the rating should at least be a few points higher than 6.8. I can only imagine its rated so poorly because this is MDL and the sex nazis must have ran amok on the damn thing. I truly believe these people (who rate shows poorly because there's sex in them) think their parents plucked them out of a night's sky! Smdh. No. Your daddy put his penis in your mama's vagina and 9 mths later you arrived! Be happy sex exists, otherwise your a**es wouldn't be here!

Apparently, a woman can experience vaginismus with one partner, but not the other, hence the reason why she was able to have sex with all those random guys. Maybe Kumi experienced a traumatic event in her childhood which makes her subconsciously disassociate sex & love. Remember at one point she said her mom & dad hated each other, but they had lots of sex. Maybe subconsciously she feels if she and Ken enjoy a robust sex life, they'll grow to hate each other like her parents? This is a very scary thought for Kumi because Ken means everything to her. She can't imagine her life without him. So every time they try to have sex, her subconscious mind goes into panic mode, causing the condition to manifest itself.

On the other hand, when she engages in anonymous sex, only her physical self is present (not her emotional & spiritual self), so there's no anxiety & the sex act can proceed. I dunno, man, just guessing cuz it's baffling as f why she could have sex with all those weirdos but not with the one who mattered the most. Too bad the drama didn't provide much explanation either.

I didn't get the impression that she fessed up about all those guys she slept with (I think that part of the confrontation was actually left unsaid). She only told him about how she lost her virginity. All along he's been thinking she's this pure, virginal creature that he wants to protect and care for like a delicate flower. Then he finds out that she was in fact not a virgin, and had possibly slept with multiple other guys ... she made a fool out of him, even though in her own way she was trying to "protect" him. So it wasn't so much about her NOT being a virgin that made him mad, imo, but being deceived by her. She lied by omission and had him walking around, acting the fool in all his misconceptions about her. I think most people in the same situation would be a little pissed.
That's why when they went back to their old college dorm to reconcile, she told him that she was afraid he would've judge her for not being a virgin & he told her that just as he had had many misconceptions about her, she had many misconceptions about him because he wouldn't have left her, had she told him the truth from the beginning.

Another thing is that he never actually hid is cheating from her. He deliberately left the brothel stamp cards in areas where she would find them (because he claims he doesn't like keeping secrets from her). So she knew what he was doing all along & didn't object since she wasn't able to perform her wifely duties. Maybe that's why there was no need for her to throw his indiscretions back in his face when he got upset at hers. It would've been an odd time for her to bring it up - like she's justifying her wrongdoing with his. But does a wife or husband have to cheat because their spouse did? I don't think so. Two wrongs don't make a right.

You're missing the point and kinda insulting my intelligence in way that I find myself having little patience for. But I'll make myself more abundantly clear since apparently you think I'm not capable of seeing the commonalities of human nature, separate from culture.

My argument above was not merely pointing to a common, universal human trait (for eg, groupthink). I was referring to the value systems - rooted in Confucian ideology - that shape Asian mentalities and worldviews and cause them to perceive opportunities and threats in a wholly different light from that of the West.

Yes, all societies practice some form of groupthink (herd mentality). However, the type of herd mentality that we tend to see in Asian societies is absolutely nothing like what we see in the West. The herd mentality that fuels this sort of criticism of a movie that merely chose to look at the creation of Hangul from a different angle (without removing Sejong as its centra pioneer), is particularly unique to Asia. That was my point.

I can hardly believe that under the exact same circumstances Hollywood would criticize the film for these same reasons. In fact, I know it wouldn't, because the West most likely would not have perceived this as a threat to Sejong's legacy. However, in Korea, just the mere idea of this film appears to be a cultural insult worthy of harsh criticism & a petition to the courts to pull it from theatres.

The groupthink in Hollywood tends to be political (the liberal vs conservative dichotomy ) whilst in Korea, Asia as a whole, it's more cultural. The criticisms against Gibson ran vastly along the political divide where liberals criticized the movies whilst conservatives revered them as masterpieces. The backlash against this film, The King, isn't so much political as it is an attempt to uphold a cultural legacy that Koreans believe is being distorted by putting the spotlight on someone other than Sejong. So apples and oranges in terms of comparing Gibson's situation with this.

Huh ... ? So they were deleted by YouTube without any warning?
Thanks for doing your best!

Oh dear, what happened? I just logged on to YouTube to watch ep 9 and all the videos are gone? They were all there this morning when I woke up. Did you delete them? Why? Is there another place we can watch the final 2 episodes? Cheers! <3