idontwanttothanks

Oh that's awesome. I had wondered if the tattoo thing was cut on purpose like Ray throwing the Silo cup was in the party ep, but it's nice to know that it's gonna be fixed, as well as the shirt error (which I honestly just found funny). Editing mistakes are common but it's cool that they're willing to go back and make changes.

I think another OD of some sort is very likely, either from Ray or Top, yeah.

Oh I didn't believe him at all when he told Mew he's not looking for a relationship. He totally is, he just has his sights set on Mew. Sand doesn't have a chance because mew is the one Ray wants, and the second he thinks that Mew might look at him he'll drop Sand without thought or remorse.

Whether you believe he really he loves Mew or not (and tbh I don't really think it matters because Ray *does* believe it and thus will act accordingly every single time), he has definitely fixated on Mew as the one who can fix him, make him better, make him smile again. You and I know that that's not how it works, that the only person who can "fix" Ray is Ray,and that it will take a lot of work and very likely some intensive therapy, but he doesn't. And frankly my biggest worry with Sand is that he's gonna fall into the trap of thinking that he can fix Ray if he just loves him enough.

PSA that I'm sure no one needs, but: You can't fix people with the power of your love. Their brokenness is not a test of your strength or willpower or ability to care for someone. And there's no one on this earth that can fix you but yourself. Period.

But well. Again, Dumb kids. LOL. So Sand is gonna break himself on Ray or let Ray break him, and Ray will do it because he can't help himself, because he's busy drowning and he'll grab at anyone else who looks like they are treading water, and no matter if he drowns them in the process. My biggest hope is that Sand gets away from him before he drowns, and that Ray takes the steps to claw himself out of his addiction/issues with depression. I thought that they could be friends in the end but lately I've been thinking that's probably not a good idea. Sand in particular I don't think is in a place to be the kind of friend Ray would need. Mew maybe, since he's much better at establishing his boundaries with Ray and (as far as we've seen anyway) sticking to them.

Honestly my biggest worry with Sand is what happens when he is pushed too far and he finally snaps. Because he's too tightly reined in for me to buy that it's not because when he loses control it's really, really bad. It's the super patient ones that tend to lose it the worst.

I am so ready for Boston and Nick to explode, haha. I want the mess. And I just don't think we've seen exactly how crazy our boy Nick can go. Top and Mew too, really. Literally the only person I don't want a ton of mess for is Sand (but lbr I'm gonna get it anyway lol).

Also something I just remembered.

Not only did Nick hack into Boston's phone and masturbate to a photo of him as well as plant a photo of himself in there for Boston to see, he also *kept hold of the passcode* to hack in again later. It honestly made me afraid to take my phone to the IT guy if it ever breaks. That is prime creeper material.

I quite like Nick and I can't wait for him to go full scorched earth himself and wreck Boston, but I'm not going to pretend that all this spy stuff he's doing isn't creepy af.

I can hang with Ray being a ride or die. :D We can't help it when we imprint, we'll do our best to justify everything, even when we can see the flaws. Just look at me with Sand, because I honestly do not care who he has to step on to get his happy ending he can step on all of them and i will be standing on the sidelines like "you're doing great sweetie good for you."

A little exaggerated but not by much. I just need him to get out of this as unscathed as possible, even if he is dumb enough to keep throwing himself into the fire like a particularly stupid (or suicidal) moth.

For me the worst bits of the trailer were Sand being screamed at by Ray and just...letting him tear strips off of him. I don't like it. Where's my "eff you, I'm not gonna be in anyone's choices/have you met my friend Baseball Bat" darling from the mock trailer? I liked that guy! This one I still adore but I can already tell that I am going to want to shake him and demand he love himself more quite a bit.

And I do try to see the ways in which Sand is contributing to his own misery. I'd *like* to blame Ray for leading him on (and in some ways he is doing so, just in that he's very much treating Sand in a way that can seem like he is interested in more than sex even if he keeps saying the opposite, but to be fair (even if I'd rather not) I don't think he's doing it on purpose - he's not really the type imo, for one he's too drunk or high most of the time. I for one do *not* think he wants Sand as a boyfriend but he is very emotionally needy and thus will constantly demand more from Sand than he is willing to give back, not necessarily in words but in actions - but he is doing it), I can't really. Sand is leading himself on, mostly, assigning meaning to things without confirming. That's on him. So is not being clear about what he really wants from Ray. He was very good about it in the 4th ep, but when things changed the communication broke apart.

I do get it though. It's a lot easier to communicate what you want from a friend than it is to put yourself out there and say "Hey. I like you more than I thought I would (maybe more than I wanted to) and maybe we need some new parameters on this relationship." Especially for a 22 year old who already has a ton of issues surrounding this kind of relationship (speaking of which, I can't WAIT for his ex to show up please show up please please please I'm praying) and has already said he's fine with the way things are.

The last five or ten minutes of last episode is my favorite bit, including the fight. It hurts, oh yes, but it's also so so *good*. Boston's utter vitriol, Ray's furious reaction, Sand's entire face journey - you can literally see him going over every interaction he's had with Ray through this new perspective and coming to some really nasty realizations about his place in Ray's life real time and it's just an excellent bit of acting by First I can't get enough of it even if I feel like it came for my throat personally. And I respect Ray's attempt to open up the lines of communication, even if I knew Sand would never take him up on it. Because that's what Sand does - it's what he's done every single time that he's been hurt by Ray so far - he pulls into himself, withdraws any type of progress, flees back to "I will NOT get involved, this has nothing to do with me, we are friends and that's it, let's just not push things." I don't blame him for this, but I do blame him for continuously stepping across the line he's already drawn. At that point he's participating in his own misery. I badly need him to stop doing that.

As for Nick, yeah I do kind of want to walk my statement about him knowing exactly what he's getting with Boston back. I don't think he quite understands just how vicious Boston can be given the opportunity - or he didn't, but now he does - but when it comes to the rest, I do think he knows. He's just assuming that if he puts in the work and maneuvers him enough he might get him to change, and that's never gonna work. People never change for others, they change for themselves. Any change they say is for you is one that will not stick because it's appeasement. And change is hard even when it is done for oneself, falling back into old patterns is the easiest thing in the world to do (and not to bring this back to Ray and Sand but we see it in action with Ray at the end of the episode - after an entire day of trying to get past his Mew thing what's the first thing he does when things go to shit (aside from head for the bottle like it's his personal savior)? Get on his phone and likely pull up Mew's insta. Because old habits die hard and following along after Mew regardless of what he wants is familiar even if it isn't fun. Hell even Top is an example of this - the second he had a hint of doubt about Mew what did he do but screw Boston, something easy and familiar even if not necessarily something he was jazzed about doing?). So Nick's gonna have a rude awakening soon. I am VERY interested to see what he does when Boston drops him.

I think Boston only escalated after Ray lunged at him, no? At first it was just taunting but then Ray lost all his shit and at that point it was just like all the simmering rage exploded into the room and it was on. It's partially my Sand Thing but also because I think he has serious anger issues that are going to be explored but I was mostly fascinated by how Nick couldn't get him to back down but the second Sand started yelling he stopped. And he looked briefly worried before he started acting like a sullen child. Iiiinteresting, I say.

And yes, I agree with you. It's comforting to assign black and white villains and good guys to characters, especially in BL because let's face it, so very often that's what happens within the shows themselves. But this one is all about gray areas. No one is supposed to be fully bad or fully good, they're just people who do might do bad or good things. I think one of the best things that a show can do is show that sometimes the worst people you know can be utterly lovely, and sometimes the nicest people you've ever met can do something incredibly ugly and selfish things, because that rings very true to life for me. No one is every good or bad 100% of the time, most of us are just muddling through trying to live our best lives, even when we're hurting other people along the way.

Thank you so much for the lovely reply - I could talk about this show all day (clearly lol).

Nothing Boston did deserved Nick bugging his car. that was nuts and it really should be pointed out as such.

To be fair, the show doesn't seem interested in pointing that out either, which interests me when it goes out of its way to point out that Boston taking photos (and possibly video?) of RayMew was definitely wrong. Me, I like to pick at things so I can't help wondering why the show is choosing to frame both incidents the way it is - currently I think it's because we're getting things from the other characters' POV so far and not Boston's and *they* don't think it's that big a deal because they, like you, feel like Boston deserves it. But no one does. That's the thing.

And much as I am not fond of Ray or the attempts to excuse all the ways he *is* being a jerk to Sand and as much as I adore Sand and want him to be happy...Sand only barely opened the door to a real relationship with him *this episode*, and it was *after* Ray said the stuff about being friends. And during the scene in the go go club Sand flat out told Ray he wasn't important enough to know about his birthday. he might not want to, but he contributed to holding the line that all they are is friends who mess around. It's not Ray's fault he wanted to change the rules and didn't say anything. Now, *we* know that Ray probably didn't want Boston to think they were together because it would get back to Mew, but *Sand* didn't - up until Boston decided to pour gasoline all over Sand's hopes and set them on fire, lol. But it doesn't change the fact that they've both been saying a lot of stuff about not wanting to be together for real. Just because only one of them really feels that way doesn't mean he's the only one who is culpable.

I wish Hunter's backstory had been woven throughout the main story better and I really don't think Pine and August's drama needed nearly four episodes.

I liked most of it well enough though. Especially Nithan and Nannam, Irin and Hack, and Florence in general. I liked all the women and about half of the men. Could have been worse. I do think the finale was kind of lackluster but I did appreciate the little moments with everyone and Phuwin's little cameo with a new set of Jungle patrons.

I want this but if the plan is to have them do more BL together I'd also appreciate one where they're not crying most of the time.

We can have both! I believe in you GMMTV.

I care about TopMew. *waves tiny flag*

ETA: want to preface this by saying it's mostly general and not directed at you specifically, it's just something I've been thinking about for a while and I just happened to see this comment and word vomited. 😀

Sand is the one character that I honestly don't care how bad he turns out to be, I will love him regardless, and frankly I wish Ray would take his issues and go back to Mew (or better yet, therapy) and away from him. I can sympathize with Ray but that still doesn't mean that I think he should be anywhere near Sand. Sand has too much on his plate to be dealing with Ray's mess on top of his own and my biggest hope is that he sees that sooner than later (a futile one because I can see the writing on the wall here, but it springs eternal and all that).

I get that Ray's easy to sympathize with because he's got the tragic backstory, but I also think he gets way too much leeway from people in general. Leeway you would not give other characters. Maybe he's everyone else's ride or die - that makes sense I guess, and if so I can understand that because, well. Sand is mine (clearly).

Which isn't to say I blame him for what's up with Sand. Sand led himself into his own feelings with no promises from Ray, he got way ahead of himself and now he has to suffer the consequences of it. What Sand needs to do is get out for his own peace of mind. For more reasons than the fact that Ray will drop him like a hot coal the second Mew crooks his little finger. But unfortunately it looks like Sand lost his spine somewhere between the mock trailer and the final product so I'm probably going to have to wait for Ray to finally ditch him for good to get what I want and that is going to suck.

I mostly agree with you about Nick, but my god I'd love to take "red and green flag" away from people as a concept. Nick is sketch, Boston is also sketch, in a lot of ways they're a match made in sketch heaven and I fully expect Nick to stop playing sweet the second Boston stops falling for the downtrodden puppy look and puts his foot down.

Yes I said that right. I fully believe that Nick is playing too, but he's actually succeeding where Boston's manipulation is obvious. These two have a routine. Boston says something Nick doesn't like, Nick gets this hurt little look but bravely soldiers through it, Boston gives him ground. It's like clockwork. Every time. I am convinced Nick knows *exactly* what he's doing, and honestly out of all these guys he is the one who sees the person he's after most clearly. Not entirely - I think that Boston's outburst at his and Sand's place really shook him up - but clearer than Top and Mew see each other, or Ray and Sand do either. Granted in the other two relationships there's also a lot of people lying to themselves too, so that might be part of it. Nick ain't lying to himself at all - he knows what he wants and he's going for it come hell or high water.

There are no villains or heroes in this show. People need to get that concept right the hell out of their heads. There's just a bunch of screwed up 20 somethings who are flailing around trying to figure out who and what they are and sometimes doing it in extremely destructive ways. Boston might be looking the worst right now but I've seen Jojo in action before and you'd be surprised how fast that can change.

I don't like all these characters, but I do enjoy them and find them interesting. I can understand why people are having trouble with them but I really think that assigning a bad and good label to any of them is way too black and white for what we're getting here and what the show is trying to do.

I do not. I think he was like "ugh Boston" per usual, but then there was the added fun that the guy who tried to blackmail him away from Boston last ep is the one he's snuggling up to and Top is the only one who knows everything...

That scene was so fun. You have Boston who knows that he and Top slept together, Nick who knows Boston and Top slept together and *has a recording of it*, and Top who has slept with Boston and knows that Nick knows and has a recording of it.

And then there's Mew, who might suspect that there's something up with Boston and Top but knows nothing else (as far as we know). I was cackling the entire time.

Lies. I very much want to see that.

Yeah, morals aren't really my concern with this show. I think we're coming at it from two different places and that's fine. I like that Sand found out sooner than later, and yeah, it was cruel, but to my mind it would have been crueler to watch Ray continuously put Sand aside whenever Mew crooked his finger, which was another way it could go (and frankly still might, but at least now if Sand puts himself in the situation for that to happen he's doing it with full knowledge).

I liked parts of it better - I liked that Sand seemed to be more tough. I was a little surprised by how he wound up turning out. Still hoping for that baseball bat though...

But I won't pretend I don't also kind of love the chaos.

HUNTER WHAT IS UP WITH YOU.

Wild theory: he's a ghost.

The first trailer isn't really a trailer, per se. It's more a concept than a final product, something they filmed for the line up only. Some (or a lot of) stuff might be similar, but it was never meant to be the actual trailer.

People quit dramas for all types of reasons. Personally I'd rather they quit than clutter up the page with constant complaints because they don't like something.

I like TopMew even if they exactly as presented. *shrug*

Personally I think the stiltedness people keep complaining about is on purpose, but even if it isn't it still works.

My least favorite couple is SandRay, so...there you go, lol.

I agree about Boston and Nick. They are the only two I can see making it, maybe more in a "they deserve each other way" than a "happily ever after" way, but still. They're both creeps with no boundaries. And I say that affectionately.

First thought: oooh this has the guy who played Nat from Gay OK Bangkok I'm in!

Second thought: Sometimes you just want a good tear jerker, I'm definitely in.

I hope it airs on youtube as well though since I won't get iQiyi. I have enough subscriptions.