Can agree why some people might dislike Seol Ah. Not sure why the ex husband deserves better, a cheat, throws…
Blame is based on perspective. They are both to blame in my opinion but by "I don't blame him" I mean I empathize with his choice, and I don't like her treatment of him (or her family) is just my feelings about people who are that selfishly superficial and motivated solely by things like wealth and status. She had to have it taken away to evolve as a character. The affair was, in my opinion, necessary for all of that to happen.
And I'm not over-inflating love at all. It's just logical that if a person is longing for something that they can't get in their relationship they are probably going to jump at the chance if it's offered elsewhere. She didn't think he would be capable of that and that was foolish. To me, it's human nature. Even in arranged marriages or other marriages of convenience, the arrangement can't override human emotions. It's the same as "I have a lover" where his wife checked out of the relationship emotionally. We are not emotionless creatures (although Seol Ah, in the beginning, had sociopath adjacent tendencies). Seol Ah bet on keeping their superficial relationship going, but her calculations were off as far as how tolerant her husband would be with their heavily one-sided relationship. It's obvious to viewers tho... that 's what makes it drama.
Can agree why some people might dislike Seol Ah. Not sure why the ex husband deserves better, a cheat, throws…
And to be clear again you don’t know anything about me so spare me on your “obligation” to help people who may be hurt by me. Lol. You are assuming way too much about my real life based on my opinions on a show.
It would be best for you moving forward to not respond to posts like this making those kind of assumptions and making these posts personal.
As far as a written character, my favorite lines coming from Seol Ah are when she's on the radio commenting about…
Even though I’m not a fan of her character I totally agree. I admit her radio segments are the best parts for her character and I was probably too annoyed by her to take in what she was saying on the air.
I also think your point about them breathing in a shared space and not understanding each other, and having a relationship for appearances sake, is spot on. My empathy for her ex doesn’t mean I see no fault in what he did as well, it’s just the consequences of two people leaping into a relationship for the wrong reasons.
And I also wish that the writer made Seol Ah’s character more about Independent personal growth and less about which man she will eventually be with. I guess there have been aspects of that , and maybe there will be more, but I think this may be why this story frustrates me to watch. I still want to see more growth from her more than I want to see her in any relationship.
The way you broke this down however did give me some things to consider as far as being more sympathetic to her character as I continue to watch. I may have a total change of heart about her in the upcoming episodes, who knows? Right now it was just a struggle for me to see her appeal at all but I can see from your post what can be likeable about her (beyond the constant sulking lol). Thx.
Can agree why some people might dislike Seol Ah. Not sure why the ex husband deserves better, a cheat, throws…
W are not going to agree on this. To feel you should be owed love and not give any in return is a selfish act. She is a selfish character for expecting it and it backfired. There’s no morality lesson here as far as I’m concerned. It seems you fault him for not having blind devotion “forever” no matter how he’s treated in his return and to me that is simply not realistic. I don’t want to keep repeating the same points. We don’t agree.
Can agree why some people might dislike Seol Ah. Not sure why the ex husband deserves better, a cheat, throws…
I think you missed some points as well.
First, She didn't waste 9 yrs. She got to be his wife and benefit from his status for 9 yrs. That is what she wanted, right? The issue was his coma gave his mom the opportunity to get rid of her. You keep skipping over the fact that she wanted to stay married to him. She wasn't dumped. The circumstance gave her mother in law fuel to end their marriage. Don't change the story to make a point.
I am also not speaking for cheaters is general I am speaking about this specific story and their specific actions and why I empathize with what lead him to cheat on her specifically. I can also say that if I am in a relationship with someone none of the circumstances in this drama would apply so please stop trying to make it personally connected to me. It was a good reason for HIM so he took it and I understand why and can empathize with his choice to have an affair. If she does not want love, and she just wanted his money, and she still gets his money, then I say it was her mistake in thinking a relationship like that would be sustainable. Again, it's just as selfish as his affair to me. There are no good guys in this scenario for me, I just empathize with his choice more than I can empathize with her, even if she was upfront.
The rest of your point again is not the story in this drama. The point is he was in a coma when they divorced and woke up shocked at the news so how does that turn into him throwing her away. He had sex with someone else. And yes, she has the right to be mad that he did, but that doesn't leave her faultless in why he did in my opinion. She bet on a scenario that most people wouldn't tolerate much less sustain for years.
Any adult would also understand reciprocity and actions leading to consequences. Just because you have a zero-tolerance attitude towards cheaters doesn't mean that affairs don't happen all the time and there are reasons why they happen... and it's not just because the cheater is a bad person. This drama literally made it clear that her lack of love made him turn to this affair. I'm not making that up, it's a plot point. Now she's "learning to love"... and I'm uninterested. That's her character arc so far. You being mad at cheaters for being cheaters doesn't change any of that.
Please keep your responses to me about this drama from this point on, and don't try to "read" into me or teach me about morality. That's my last point.
Can agree why some people might dislike Seol Ah. Not sure why the ex husband deserves better, a cheat, throws…
None of these arguments are making me like her more. It's basically confirms why I don't like her. I also don't find it pragmatic to be self-centered and greedy. Her whole MO was to marry a rich guy for his status, and leave her family behind. He may have broken his "promise" to patiently wait for her to maybe like him back one day, but he stayed with her anyway when he could have left her for the asst full stop! Their relationship is messy but her being "Honest" doesn't leave her faultless in my eyes. She has the right to expect devotion, but it's a foolish expectation with very little reciprocity in the relationship (and no dealing with his mom doesn't count)... and no her being "pretty" doesn't cut it. He's an obsessed fool for going along with this marriage, sure, but once he saw an opportunity to get attention from someone who loved him he took it, and it's hard to blame him for that.
If I almost feel bad for anyone it's Hae Rang, but she's a jerk who deserves what she got too.
Also, don't casually say he could have just divorced her because that actually goes against what Seol Ah really wanted in the first place. Let's also be clear that she had to be forced out of that marriage while he was unconscious and THAT is what finally humbled her and made her less of a b!tch. If he never crashed and she found out about the affair she surely would have been leveraging her way into staying in the relationship regardless, so I don't buy any of this fake "betrayal" motivation. Her only motivation was to not be replaced.
Clearly her ex is obsessed, since he still wants her, but that doesn't make me understand her appeal. At all. I also don't find her character very unique either. She's spent most of this drama sulking and complaining with a few romantic interludes with Tae Rang in between (who also seems to have a thing for problematic women... including his sister). So to have half of this drama be about a gold digger who learns to love is not appealing to me. I want to roll my eyes and fast forward everytime I see her sulking face on the screen.
I think the writer's intention was to make all of the characters to blame for their failed marriage (like she did in "I Have a Lover"), but I'm not feeling it. If she was the main lead I would have dropped this drama long ago. Now I'm kinda struggling thinking about how many episodes of sulking are left.
Can agree why some people might dislike Seol Ah. Not sure why the ex husband deserves better, a cheat, throws…
To me going to an area to meet a rich man taking pics in a compromising position and then lying that your parents are dead all qualify as manipulation. And if their deal was a loveless marriage then it’s hard to argue that she felt betrayed. This whole scenario is dysfunctional and silly to me, but they made it pretty clear that simply showing him love was what tempted him into the affair with his assistant and if she can’t love him and only wants his money and status then she sure ruined it by expecting love and devotion from him.
I don’t get why it’s hubris to expect love from your wife and not hubris to expect your spouse to stay in a loveless relationship with you... and there’s no way that I think she would have accepted a divorce before the affair based the on her actions. She couldn’t get pregnant and the only reason I think she was mad about the affair is because she knew he could replace her.
As the show progresses she becomes less of a b!tch but she treated everyone like crap at some point except her ex mother in law, who is also horrible but she wasn’t wrong about SA’s intentions with her son.
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And so much screaming lol
I Just looked up and something really "dramatic" happened and I still don't care. I may not even make it to the end of this episode.
And I'm not over-inflating love at all. It's just logical that if a person is longing for something that they can't get in their relationship they are probably going to jump at the chance if it's offered elsewhere. She didn't think he would be capable of that and that was foolish. To me, it's human nature. Even in arranged marriages or other marriages of convenience, the arrangement can't override human emotions. It's the same as "I have a lover" where his wife checked out of the relationship emotionally. We are not emotionless creatures (although Seol Ah, in the beginning, had sociopath adjacent tendencies). Seol Ah bet on keeping their superficial relationship going, but her calculations were off as far as how tolerant her husband would be with their heavily one-sided relationship. It's obvious to viewers tho... that 's what makes it drama.
It would be best for you moving forward to not respond to posts like this making those kind of assumptions and making these posts personal.
I also think your point about them breathing in a shared space and not understanding each other, and having a relationship for appearances sake, is spot on. My empathy for her ex doesn’t mean I see no fault in what he did as well, it’s just the consequences of two people leaping into a relationship for the wrong reasons.
And I also wish that the writer made Seol Ah’s character more about Independent personal growth and less about which man she will eventually be with. I guess there have been aspects of that , and maybe there will be more, but I think this may be why this story frustrates me to watch. I still want to see more growth from her more than I want to see her in any relationship.
The way you broke this down however did give me some things to consider as far as being more sympathetic to her character as I continue to watch. I may have a total change of heart about her in the upcoming episodes, who knows? Right now it was just a struggle for me to see her appeal at all but I can see from your post what can be likeable about her (beyond the constant sulking lol). Thx.
First, She didn't waste 9 yrs. She got to be his wife and benefit from his status for 9 yrs. That is what she wanted, right? The issue was his coma gave his mom the opportunity to get rid of her. You keep skipping over the fact that she wanted to stay married to him. She wasn't dumped. The circumstance gave her mother in law fuel to end their marriage. Don't change the story to make a point.
I am also not speaking for cheaters is general I am speaking about this specific story and their specific actions and why I empathize with what lead him to cheat on her specifically. I can also say that if I am in a relationship with someone none of the circumstances in this drama would apply so please stop trying to make it personally connected to me. It was a good reason for HIM so he took it and I understand why and can empathize with his choice to have an affair. If she does not want love, and she just wanted his money, and she still gets his money, then I say it was her mistake in thinking a relationship like that would be sustainable. Again, it's just as selfish as his affair to me. There are no good guys in this scenario for me, I just empathize with his choice more than I can empathize with her, even if she was upfront.
The rest of your point again is not the story in this drama. The point is he was in a coma when they divorced and woke up shocked at the news so how does that turn into him throwing her away. He had sex with someone else. And yes, she has the right to be mad that he did, but that doesn't leave her faultless in why he did in my opinion. She bet on a scenario that most people wouldn't tolerate much less sustain for years.
Any adult would also understand reciprocity and actions leading to consequences. Just because you have a zero-tolerance attitude towards cheaters doesn't mean that affairs don't happen all the time and there are reasons why they happen... and it's not just because the cheater is a bad person. This drama literally made it clear that her lack of love made him turn to this affair. I'm not making that up, it's a plot point. Now she's "learning to love"... and I'm uninterested. That's her character arc so far. You being mad at cheaters for being cheaters doesn't change any of that.
Please keep your responses to me about this drama from this point on, and don't try to "read" into me or teach me about morality. That's my last point.
If I almost feel bad for anyone it's Hae Rang, but she's a jerk who deserves what she got too.
Also, don't casually say he could have just divorced her because that actually goes against what Seol Ah really wanted in the first place. Let's also be clear that she had to be forced out of that marriage while he was unconscious and THAT is what finally humbled her and made her less of a b!tch. If he never crashed and she found out about the affair she surely would have been leveraging her way into staying in the relationship regardless, so I don't buy any of this fake "betrayal" motivation. Her only motivation was to not be replaced.
Clearly her ex is obsessed, since he still wants her, but that doesn't make me understand her appeal. At all. I also don't find her character very unique either. She's spent most of this drama sulking and complaining with a few romantic interludes with Tae Rang in between (who also seems to have a thing for problematic women... including his sister). So to have half of this drama be about a gold digger who learns to love is not appealing to me. I want to roll my eyes and fast forward everytime I see her sulking face on the screen.
I think the writer's intention was to make all of the characters to blame for their failed marriage (like she did in "I Have a Lover"), but I'm not feeling it. If she was the main lead I would have dropped this drama long ago. Now I'm kinda struggling thinking about how many episodes of sulking are left.
I don’t get why it’s hubris to expect love from your wife and not hubris to expect your spouse to stay in a loveless relationship with you... and there’s no way that I think she would have accepted a divorce before the affair based the on her actions. She couldn’t get pregnant and the only reason I think she was mad about the affair is because she knew he could replace her.
As the show progresses she becomes less of a b!tch but she treated everyone like crap at some point except her ex mother in law, who is also horrible but she wasn’t wrong about SA’s intentions with her son.