Family by Choice

An Improvement On the OG (imho)

I'm glad I finally got around to this version!

It was a breath of fresh air after (mostly) slogging through the original Cdrama. The original has a very nostalgic quality to it, for sure (in a way that Reply 1988 managed to capture, too), and does a good job capturing the passage of time and the messiness of life (I think because it took more time to pause, meander, and just let characters and scenes and shots "be" without always moving the plot forward deftly and swiftly like in the Kdrama), but everyone was a bit too much of a hot mess for me (almost in a way that the drama itself didn't seem to own up to as being problems, which bothered me).

I mean, Li Hai Chao (the father of the FL in the original) was an actual saint compared to every other adult. He was an amazing character, and by far my favorite. In contrast, many of the characters were made into healthier versions of themselves in this drama, so Yoon Jeong Jae (this drama's Li Hai Chao) felt more like a typical awesome, loving dad (as opposed to a saint 😅) in this since everyone else wasn't terrible by comparison.

This version overall tempered the unrealistic or problematic themes or scenarios of the original, and really improved them, in my opinion. There were things portrayed as "normal" or "okay" in the original that at times just made me really uncomfortable (and while we're on the subject of uncomfortable, can I just express my puzzlement over romance Cdramas having scenes with the FL on her period? What's up with that? 🧐). This drama also had a much faster pace, and condensed quite a bit, leaving out filler/annoying plots and things that made the original drag. All my favorite parts from the original were included, and I didn't feel like anything was missing to complete this version.

For instance, regarding an "inprovement": the "brothers" never fight over the FL in this (oh, what glory!) and instead Hae Joon was always just Joo Won's brother, and nothing else. San Ha was responsible and mature like in the original, but far more gentle, sensitive (he's the best at picking up on nonverbal cues that someone is not okay), empathetic and functional in this version (Joo Won isn't what helps him to cope, like a drug that he needs to "get by" (like the original); instead, he gravitates to her because she's always been there for him, and rooted for him), and also, Hae Joon and San Ha had a much stronger friendship and bond with each other than in the original. In the original, it feels more like the brothers tolerate each other because of the FL, and wouldn't have much to say to each other if it weren't for her (especially later when the leads start dating and the boys start fighting over her like a toy they both want 🤢).

In this drama, the brothers stand up for each, support each other, and fight for one another's flourishing. All three "siblings" do this for one another, and it was lovely to watch. (They even give Hae Joon a loveline, and allow second leads to end up together rather than leaving them to pine in misery--way to go, writer!!).

It's still got some very dramatic characters and moments that lean into melodramatic soapiness, but it was a joy to watch. Episode 16 was just darling, and had me grinning from start to finish. You should definitely give it a go!

It demonstrates the power of love to heal, transform and empower, and affirms found family as an alternative to toxic "blood ties." Sweet stuff!

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Sweet, fun and only slightly frustrating

Ah, Hwang In Youp! I’m so glad he landed his main lead role, where he ultimately gets the girl. It’s well-deserved; he has such a main character attitude, and it was long overdue for him to have that opportunity.


I thought the drama was quite good. It had strong plot development, amazing character chemistry, and some really funny moments.


The relationship between Kim San Ha, Yun Ju Won, and Kang Hae Jun was the highlight, of course. It beautifully depicted family by choice, not by blood, with a bond so strong that it never wanes, even when they are apart. It’s a really touching storyline that grips you, even if you prefer faster-paced dramas.


I also appreciated how the action was divided into three parts: the initial arc when they were kids, the middle arc during high school, and the final arc when they became adults. This structure allowed us to delve into the dynamics between characters and explore the story in detail rather than feeling rushed.


The friendship between Yun Jeong Jae and Kim Dae Uk, our dedicated parents, was a lovely plotline. It really showed that having someone in your corner during tough times makes life feel less burdensome. I was genuinely moved by how they raised the three kids together. I also valued the storyline involving the mothers and the reasons behind their abandonment. With Kang Seo Hyeon, I can forgive her choices, but in the case of Kwon Jeong Hui, I can’t help but think she deserved everything that happened to her. I wanted to feel sympathy for her since she faced hardships, but blaming your child for your misfortune never sits right with me.


Now, regarding the romance: while I enjoyed that San Ha and Ju Won got their happy ending, I found it a bit strange how their feelings developed. Even though it was apparent during the high school arc – at least in San Ha’s case – going from childhood friends to estranged to lovers felt rushed. It seemed like they wanted to include this relationship without knowing how to properly incorporate it into the storyline by the end.


Hae Jun and Dal, on the other hand, were adorable. While I wished Hae Jun had recognised Dal’s feelings sooner and handled them better, I thought the way they ended up together was really sweet. I was glad the drama had an overall happy ending for everyone involved (except for Kwon Jeong Hui).


In the end, I was really happy to have watched this drama. Family by Choice is the kind of show you turn to when you need a reminder that just because you were born into a particular family dynamic, it doesn’t mean you have to stay in it. You can choose your own peers and family – people who make you happy and lift you up instead of dragging you down.

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funsies kdrama def recommend

family by choice is a fun drama centered around the relationships of haejun, juwon, and sanha who have a sibling-like bond but have no blood relation to one another.

what this drama does great:
- gives us a multifaceted view of all the main characters. we're able to see life/the timeline of the drama from all 3 of them which i thought was great! getting to know each character felt so personal.
- haejun and juwon's dad had some of the most sob-worthy scenes ever. their relationship was so heartwarming. haejun's healing journey was so great to watch and also to see dal and him help each other through hardships throughout their lives.
- their take on familial troubles wasn't shallow and actually felt very realistic.
- every episode while all having pretty sad moments at times always felt really giddy it's just a really fun watch overall it makes you wish you could be there too
- NO love triangle thank the lords

what could've been done better:
- while sanha's 14 year long or however many year long crush on sanha was well drawn out, we never got that from juwon. it was just her being flustered by sanha's confession(s) and then dating him. i wish they could've either added scenes where maybe in their younger years she thought of him that way too or have done like flashback scenes idk it just. for a childhood friends to lovers trope was not a very deep romantic relationship
- haejun's america storyline was idk all over the place and needed better integration to the plot. also similar to my issue w juwon he should've had a gradual liking to dal while im happy they got together at the end he literally said in that ep that they aren't good together and then later asked her out

overall lovedddd this show chaeyeon is such an amazing actress

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Remake, but still worth watching

As someone who had already watched Go Ahead and loved it, I was hesitant to watch it's remake because I was afraid that it would ruin my fav cdrama for me.

My primary reason to watch this drama was that I heard Hwang In Youp got the girl in this one (Han Seojun fever ifykyk 😭).

(This is my first time of writing review, so please don't mind if I say something inappropriate. )

I love Go Ahead, it's one my favourite cdramas. And Family By Choice? I love this too.

Initially, I expected it to be the exact copy of Go Ahead. Although, the canon events Aren't changed, yet there were some small changes in this one. I liked the changes, as they were mostly what I found controversial in the original one.

In my country, if you call even a random stranger brother, then he is your brother - there is no scope for romance (I think you can guess the country). So, in Go Ahead, when the main lead got together, and Brother He too said that he liked the girl, it felt weird to me. But in FBC, the brother sister relation of the main leads is not much shown, so it doesn't feel so weird. And the brother wanting to marry the FL is also shown very less, so it all feels comforting and natural.

As for the acting, why I gave 9 and not 10 was because I felt more connected to the characters in Go Ahead. Yeah I said I found somethings weird, but I still felt more drawn to them, especially Brother He (portrayed by Steven Zhang). I'm not saying that Bea Hyunsung didn't do well. He did great too. All the other actors did well too.
The boyfriend's mother? I hated her like I did in GA.
The Brother's mother? I liked her like I did in GA.
The fathers? I loved them both, and shipped them both 🤭 like I did in GA.
The main leads? I loved them both more than I did in GA!

So, in conclusion, I would say that..
Although it's a remake and is very similar to the original one (obviously), yet there are some things which make it worth watching 🫶🏻

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Heartwarming family drama with touches of romance, and a lot of tears

*** SPOILERS ALERT ***

I started to watch the cdrama Go ahead before Family by choice because I wanted to compare the remake with the original story and to be perfectly honest, I dropped it after ep 6 /7 and skipped to later episodes to see how the story will develop and what I saw didn’t convince me enough to continue watching… It’s not because it was bad, but I feel like the pacing was so slow and I simply don’t have the patience to watch 40 episodes of the same series. Furthermore, I had a hard time connecting with the Fl characterization, too childlike in comparison with her “brothers”. Certainly, the cdrama had more time to explore in depth the relationships between all the characters and felt more “raw” in its characters and emotions whereas the kdrama felt like it was a prettier and “polished” version of the story. (Please don’t attack me because I like the remake better, it is my opinion, and I still respect the original story and those who love it.)

So, here’s a quick review of what I liked/disliked in this remake:

Pros:
- The acting is phenomenal! Especially the main trio, they were absolutely perfect! Big kudos to the Fl’s actress, I’m not very familiar with her but she was convincing and her acting kinda reminded me of the actress in Lovely runner, who I like very much. Her character was overall very loveable and caring, a little childish sometimes but it wasn't too extreme. Of course HIY was a safe bet, I adored him in True beauty and his acting here is so touching, especially when his character showed despair in difficult moments. Then we have Kang Hae Jun’s actor who was a total revelation for me! His duality convinced me entirely and I will keep an eye on his future projects for sure.
- Great chemistry between all the cast, be it platonic or romantic relationship, it all felt very natural and mature.
- Speaking of romance, I actually really liked the romance between the main couple, I knew it was gonna happen since I read some spoilers in the Go ahead MDL page. Personally, I don’t think their relationship was weird, because I considered them more as very close childhood friends than the brother/sister type of thing. Also! The Fl wasn’t just a wooden plank when it came to intimate scenes and it was very refreshing to see. The second couple, Hea Jun / Dal, truly developed their relationship in the very end of the series, so we didn’t get to see much of them together but they were still cute nevertheless!
- The friendship between Ju Won and Dal was so cute!! I was afraid of a possible love triangle between Ju Won / Dal / San Ha but fortunately they chose to keep it simple and that was a very smart decision coming from the writing team.
- The OST and cinematography are also great, and I also really liked the fact that we could hear them speak a dialect different from what we are used to hear in kdramas.
- Of course, the other star of the show, Ju won’s dad! Such a generous and selfless individual! I’m sure such a person can exist in real life and I wish them the very best.
- Great balance of humorous and sad scenes. The sad scenes were STRONG that’s for sure but the humor was there to lighten up the mood without being forced or out of place.

Cons:
- Some scenes/events were a little repetitive in the end, especially with Hae Jun’s storyline, but I’m still glad they didn’t add 36 subplots to the main story.
- For the romantic relationship between Ju Won and San Ha, I agree with some comments that Ju Won accepted San Ha’s feelings a little too quickly, we saw that he had a crush on her since high school but for her it wasn’t shown at all. They should have added some little scenes in which she questioned her feelings for him way before his sudden confession. Of course, they had to concentrate all the story and character development in only 16 episodes so the pacing was understandably very fast, but I still liked it very much because their chemistry was still great in my opinion.
- I didn’t understand the final development between San Ha and his mom… She threatened Ju Won and asked her to put an end to their relationship (fortunately she didn’t listen but still) and we saw San Ha begging her to…. what? Love him finally? After all she put him through? And then she flew to the UK with his sister, leaving him alone (at last!!) on a whim? The last episode was a little disappointing in this aspect, and I sincerely hoped she would seek psychological help in the end to become less of a burden to her son and make amends… But alas it didn’t happen. I guess they wanted to show that some people don’t want to heal themselves and prefer to continue their toxic relationship with their family. IDK but the pacing here was way too fast for my taste.
- Finally, the 10 years or so of no-contact between the main trio was a little hard to believe, especially for San Ha because he was only in Seoul whereas Hae Jun stayed in the US for a few years so it was a tiny bit more understandable but still… They tried to give explanations later as to why they wouldn’t/couldn’t maintain any contact with Ju Won and her dad but yeah, I understand it was necessary for the story to properly develop but it was still weird.

So that’s all for me! Give it a try because it was still a great and entertaining watch, despite some negative aspects. Especially if you didn’t watch the original series already, or if you like a more fast paced family story with great acting.

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Mothers so toxic, the drama should’ve come with a hazmat warning

I was hesitant to watch this remake of a Chinese Drama that I watched and then dropped shortly after. I remembered I couldn’t stomach the emotional abuse that was going on during the first episodes of the OG, that I thought I wouldn’t have picked up this drama until I saw the teasers, which looked promising. 

Having said that, I went into this drama without a source material so hopefully, I can be more objective and not be spending my time comparing it to the original.  

The first half of the drama started out great. I was impressed by the performance of the child actors and their sweet disposition. Also, I appreciated the subtle gentleness Yun Jeong Jae showed as a father figure, and how the children who became his sons loved him dearly, despite the lack of legal adoption.  

Growing up as a trio, San Ha, Ju Won and Hae Jun’s closeness as pseudo-siblings were endearing, if they only stayed as such. What refrained me from giving this drama a perfect score is the contrived romance between San Ha and Ju Won, and to a lesser extent between Hae Jun and Park Dal. There’s no chemistry to speak of, and I would have been satisfied if they stayed as siblings. This drama is fundamentally about a chosen family and their dynamics, which is why it’s called “Family by Choice,” and not “Lovers by Coincidence”.  

If there was any romance that needs to be explored here, is that between Ju Won’s father and Hae Jun’s mother. Their awkward shyness was fun to watch, especially when San Ha’s father was teasing them. Speaking of which, Dae Uk and Jeong Jae had more bromance chemistry between them than either of the main couple. But this would be too scandalous, so I get it. Despite everything, I was impressed by how these two men, despite their inexperience, raised resilient and kind children in the show. 

While I was very proud of the men’s representation, the same couldn’t be said for the mothers. I almost had a coronary just watching these horrible mothers treat their sons as if they are disposable. I anticipated their dismissal in the latter part of the narrative, yet they reappeared and focused solely on self-gain.

Though wrong, Hae Jun’s mother’s decade-long silence was at least understandable, given her grievances. But San Ho’s mother takes the award for “Mothers Who Shouldn’t be Mothers”. She did not deserve any ounce of sympathy from her son when she accused him of something that clearly was her own fault (and the father’s too). Her gaslighting irked me to no end, and I felt frustrated by Han So’s misplaced sense of loyalty.

The character development in this drama was lackluster, and the closure was also weak. In fact, they doubled down on excusing San Ha’s mother’s actions as justifiable because of a traumatic past. The writers must have somehow forgotten that San Ha suffered too.

Not to say that the acting by the three main cast members were sub-par, but I probably enjoyed the personalities of their child version more; at least they had spunk, tenacity and an unadulterated innocence that would have fit a lot better in a narrative about familial bonds.

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a great ride

this is for the cliche loving gals. but its a good one.
predictable, dramatic, cliche, but someimes that what you want k?
is it amazing??? no. but its goodddd.
its just a kdrama that is a good watch. reminds me of those 2017 kdramas (makes sense considering all).
its not pretending to be something its not- which is great.
its full of heartwarming moments of parenthood and brothership and family.
it also has many horrible parents sprinkled around so just take note i guess.
the cast is just perfect, i think it really does a lot, they really feel like a family and its adorable

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Good Enough

Korean Drama '' Family By Choice '' is a family melodrama with some romance thrown in the mix.

The drama has a solid family drama plot, as it navigates the dynamics of multiple families and their atypical family arrangements. Thus, it is filled with emotional scenes and many twists.

On the other hand, the romance was predictable and full of cheesy scenes. It was also overshadowed by the family drama, fortunately, which had a stronger plot.

In addition, the performances were all great by every actor and actress in the cast.

So, overall, seven out of ten.

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Overall, I really enjoyed watching this series. The character development across the board was excellent. It did a great job showing a difficult childhood and how it affected adult life. Another big plus was the main couple’s relationship — once they got together, there were no pointless arguments added just to create “drama” for the sake of the plot.

Of course, I also watched the original — the Chinese version — but I actually preferred the Korean adaptation, for several reasons:
- They got rid of the weird love triangle between the main heroine and the two brothers, which made it much more pleasant to watch. Because of that, the brothers also seemed more bonded — for example, they both knew about his return.
- The main heroine’s best friend didn’t fall for Kim San-ha, which in the Chinese version felt extremely forced. Plus, here she got a happy ending with Kang Hae-joon.
- They didn’t try to convince me that Kim San-ha cured depression and anxiety with herbal medicine — though that’s kind of a weak plus, because in this version his issues were almost completely brushed aside.
- Kim San-ha actually asked Yoon Joo-won about their relationship — something I really missed in the original.

However, I also found a few downsides compared to the Chinese version:
- Kim San-ha’s problems were completely ignored. He went through hell with his mother for ten years, yet he never once brought it up with Yoon Joo-won. She saw the scars on his arms, and later they even slept together — but she somehow didn’t notice his burn marks? I really missed seeing them talk about such a serious topic.
- Kang Hae-joon’s relationship with his biological father was underdeveloped. We know his father abandoned him again after his child was born, but this was barely addressed. The same goes for the accidental death of his mother — it was brought up and then completely dropped.

A minor issue, but I felt sad that Kim San-ha didn’t become a dentist, just because Yoon Joo-won was afraid of going to them :(

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Interesting premise

I am not going to wade into the "which is better, the original Chinese drama or this" controversy. I have never watched the Chinese original (and don't intend to) so I can't comment.

The only thing I want to touch on is the mental and social commentary stemming from this drama. First, I find it interesting that this 'alternative' family arrangement has been highlighted, perhaps as the writer's hope that single-parent families and alternative family arrangements will one day become normalised in Korea. It is often not their fault that such families end up the way they are, and they shouldn't face discrimination because of it. Not everyone is fortunate enough to have a happy 'standard' family and as society, we shouldn't comment on what makes another family happy.

Second, what really bugs me is the lack of acknowledgement of mental health. San Ha's mom clearly has narcissistic personality disorder in the way that she manipulates everyone around her and never admits her responsibility for her own situation. Threatening suicide is one such example of manipulation. She needs psychiatric care. This in turn has caused San Ha untold mental anguish as manifested through his constant anxiety and insomnia. Just 'talking it out' won't make either sets of symptoms go away. This is unrealistic and I wished the drama could have handled it better.

Especially in a high pressure society like SK where there is already such a high incidence of suicide and other undiagnosed mental health ailments, this is the best opportunity to normalise help-seeking. As a doctor, Sanha really should have known better than to play to manipulation. There isn't even a need to make a big deal out of it - him putting his mom in a psychiatric ward would have made me feel so much better about her ending rather than letting her run away again!

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