Blackrabbit63

Don't forget too that XY responded to Jing as a man, in that terrible state his body was in, early on in Ep 2 or 3. That was the moment that he decided he could live again, and became entwined with XY. So whatever he was as a spoiled/golden boy before his brother captures him, we only have how Fenglong and Xin Yue see him to go by. I think he was always gentle, and always trying to make peace between his brother and his mother. As abhorrent as I find what CX's mother did (I agree with Tong Hua here too), I also find how Jing's mother treats Huo to be as bad, and how Jing and XY accept abandoning the nephew - that is also not a good reflection on their characters/relationship. I find it a really odd choice, and indicates they are still uncaring to anyone but themselves. A very interesting point raised here about this, thanks! Jing is essentially selfish, you are right, Kokuto. I didn't see this clearly before about him. Everything is about him and what he wants. He's as morally grey as XL and CX are. Fenglong looks better and better....
Every time I try to picture Jing and FFYY together, all I think of is saccharine sweetness, fake love between them. Ugh.

Exactly. I agree with your points here. At long last, he comes through with his promise to return Shiqi to her, then, too.

Lost You forever I have always thought also referred to CX and XY: he loses her and never gets her back, in the end. They also can't be together, and can't forget each other. He is always moving away from her, and she is moving away from him. It's so poignant to go back and see them as children, saying if they become siblings they can stay together forever, and then seeing how the story plays out in the rest of the novel. They are never together for long after that. I also don't think it applies to one character/story arc, but to several characters: CX & XY, and XL & XY. Definitely XL and XY!! If Jing had stayed dead, then it would have applied to him for XY, too.

The first time I watched Part two when it finally aired, I also thought at one point that maybe she wouldn't end up with anyone either. It might have been the best resolution for her, especially as Kokuto points out, she still needs to heal herself. She's begun to heal, but abandonment issues don't disappear overnight.

I really enjoyed your comments here, Kokuto. I agree with them all. I'll have to go look for those discussions on why XL chose to die - I haven't seen those yet. It might have been the author's decision for the story she was telling, because the end note in the novel becomes so moving then. I love what you say about Fenglong - and he wasn't going to be manipulated by XY either, he is too clever for that, even if he doesn't know anything about romance, lol. I liked him as her companion because they were equals and could be friends, something she wasn't always towards Jing or XL. So many levels of love and friendship in this drama! I always have a place in my heart for Fenglong. Also that he is relatively 'trauma free' 😊😂 I wish there were an addendum written with the three possible endings with XL, Jing, and Fenglong....ooh, or maybe a fourth where she stays a spinster with CX (and watch how this disrupts his entire harem.....)

I so like this point, Kokuto! XY had such serious issues of abandonment, that it cost her the relationship with XL, FFB, and almost pushed Jing away completely. It's only when she meets Tian Er (after the wedding) and hears her talk about reaping what you put in, that XY begins to understand how her mistrust of others from her trauma has hurt her in relationships. I too would have liked her to go by herself - chose no one - because none of them were perfect choices. Even the deep connection with XL, wasn't one that could be lived with comfortably every day. I am glad for XY's sake though that she chooses then to try again with Jing, to learn to be a better partner - to put in the effort this time. That is an awesome moment of growth and understanding in the story for her. And because he waited, is still waiting, after everything, he deserves this chance with her too.

I agree with everything you say here, AkuMau. I especially like the last thought - that this about honouring the complexity of a story that was never meant to be one-dimensional. I see the deep connection XY and XL share, that is echoed/mirrored in FFB with her - a kind of innate soul depth connection, a need to challenge themselves, and to be free, but there is also a depth and darkness in their relationship too. It certainly leaves a mark on both of them and changes them. I find their connection and moments together breathtaking, that's how powerful it is. Whereas with Jing, it's safe and comfortable, and as you say, she can control Jing. She can't ever control XL. Great points you raise 😊

You and I both agree on XL here! Excellent points you raise. I really like what you say here: "XL was a demon that never experienced romantic love. HE was not the one who made someone feel deeply first. And seriously. Do you think feelings come with guarantees? XL never claimed to protect XY, he just did it. And he certainly didn't let XY suffer emotionally, like Jing did. In fact, a good portion of his time with XY was trying to ease her emotional suffering caused by Jing. " That's as both XY and FBB, trying to make sure she was ok. XL gave her so much!

@Kokuto Thank you for making these points! you saved me from having to! lol

I would add to @Tara Daneen that CX doesn't emotionally guilt-trip XY; she volunteers to become the Haoling Princess to help him become Emperor, and later, he asks her and cautions her about Jing, over and over, but he doesn't manipulate her. He uses her presence to get to Jing , but she is fully aware and accepts to do this for him. Even when he does the terrible thing to Jing, he is not manipulating XY; she is possibly the only person he never manipulates in the drama.

There is lots in this drama about what the eye sees, and what the mind perceives, for us the viewers, and for the characters themselves. All of which is different, depending on the perspective and how hurt the characters are, and where we are in our own lives. Rewatching this drama again now, I can see how hurt each time FBB is when XY chooses Jing over him (which is every time), and I don't think she is conscious of how often she does this, and certainly not aware of how upset FBB is when she does this. It's just a small thing in the story, yet so important a clue to what is going on between them. So many signals and understandings are missed by each character in this drama. And even when things are said clearly, the receiver of the wisdom often ignores it - Fenglong telling his sister that CX is not the man for her, everyone telling XY FBB is better for her than Jing, are two examples. I just watched these episodes, so I saw the pattern similarity. In the things the writer leaves out, the 90% intention, is where the actors can convey with expressions, not words. Each actor is very good in this drama in using expressions, too. So there are words, the setting, the actions, and the expressions. I think it's why LYF is a drama I can rewatch so many times, and find so many new things to understand. And there are still all the things the writer can't convey with words! The allusions, poetry, and literature inferences really help with expressing what she was saying with this story. As to the question of what we see with our naked eye, I think that is an ongoing question not just in the novel, but also in real life. 😊

LOL to describing it as "desperate flailing before drowning in a wave of evidence"!!! I just rewatched the scene again where Jing confesses he wants to pursue XY, and Fenglong's explosion of anger - it's interesting that he already thinks of XY as his, which I don't think anyone else expects! You are right, given time and if they had gotten married, I think Fenglong would have come to love and appreciate her deeply. He treated his sister very well, and that's usually an indication (mothers and sisters) how men will treat their wives. Also wonder then if XY would have opened herself to Fenglong then too, really opened herself. So many what if's too in this drama....a big one for me, what if XY had kissed XL underwater when he asked her to? How would everything have changed then? All these men want to make her theirs, and they each go about it so differently. But Fenglong is definitely the 4th far choice, not a real intimate choice for XY. This drama is so fascinating! My 4th rewatch and I still find so much to see and understand.

Yes, I agree, the actors really gave it their all, and they had lots to explore in their characters. The script is wonderful, there are no filler lines, and every scene has a point that moves the plot along.

I'm watching slowly (for me) and taking screen shots of everything that interests me! There is so much more going on in the background of each episode, where the episode is located - and how many shots are actually set outdoors, is really interesting. I feel like I am taking a long deep look at everything in this drama this time, while enjoying every moment of the story. Like a slow boat ride through it 😍🥰 Hmm, though maybe taking notes is also good, for referencing later. There is so much set up in the first three episodes, that the rest of the drama refers to over and over or delves into in different ways. I'll come take a look at your notes 😊

I don't think anyone picks only on Jing. If you've read through the comments from the beginning, there are some XL dislikers out there, who find him extremely toxic and manipulative, which he is. He is also one of my favourite characters, because even with his dark side, he loves XY and does so much for her, and he also has his own sense of honour. He is a fascinating character. So is CX, who is also both dark and light. Many viewers dislike his storyline with XY and his wanting to be more than siblings with her (I don't, I love this storyline). As for Jing, his character is the most difficult to understand because much of what he does is behind the scenes, revealed in comments from others, or in close watching. I have not always liked the character of Jing, but I am giving him a close watch in my current rewatch of the drama, and I am seeing how much of his character is revealed in subtext, and in his actions that other characters comment on: he is always plotting how he can spend time with her, if it means rearranging money and politics and where CX is so he can have a chance to be with her, he does. He's a superb strategist. Even XY comes to realize how cunning he is. He's definitely not noble or perfect, he is unable to let her go even when he realizes he is not the right choice for her. In a way, he has power over her too, as XL does, even if it is wielded in a glove. He is soft, unable to be decisive, lets his actions be different from his words, delaying his relationship with her time and again. But I find that I am with XY, when she says that same quality, gentleness, is what makes him so soft, is also what makes her love him. He is not like any of the other characters. I am glad we have him in contrast with the other male leads, so there are options for masculinity in this drama. It's needed! I also think it was a difficult role to play, because Deng Wei has to make a character who appears subservient to XY as appealing and attractive as possible, and he conveys the character's devotion so very clearly and believably. Jing is soft in love, in contrast to all the other characters in the drama.

yes! I just watched these episodes in the last two days, so they are fresh in my mind. Jing is dying because he can't/won't live without her. He saves her physical body in the fire, but she is alive only because CX had the spirit power sent into her body to preserve her organs, until XL arrives. He even says this to CX. I agree, the drama and novel make it clear that XL is the only one who can save her, because of the love bugs, and also because he has extra lives. Jing is willing to die to shield her, but he can't save her, she is already mostly gone when he arrives at the plum forest.

Thank you so much for sharing this. I'm in the middle of a re-watch now, and I'm noticing different elements in the backgrounds of the different settings. The cinematography really captures the grand setting, and the intimate personal relationships between XY and her male leads, so well. The use of colour makes this drama a visual treat too. I didn't know about the two lines, dark and light, so I will have to go back to the novel to reread it for the darker storyline again.

It's such a stretch! In no way is he part of that love triangle! I made the point just below that he is her settling choice, if she can't have either of the ones she loves, then she can live comfortably without love - and with companionship - with Fenglong. I love his character too, he is so engaging and enthusiastic!

Is there anyone who thinks the story is about choosing between Jing and Fenglong? It's always Jing and XL, right from the first three chapters, the set-up between XY, XL and Jing is made. Fenglong is the choice for settling when she can't have either of the ones she wants. ( I love his character, too!) I'm re-watching the drama right now, so paying close attention to what each of them are saying, and then doing, to better understand the movement between these three characters. I also think your words above, especially the second phrasing, apply to CX as well as XL. CX loses XY in the very beginning of the story, and never really has her for long once she comes back - she keeps going away in various ways from him. It's also really interesting that he can't recognize her in her changed state, although the stone shows her as his missing sister, he still won't believe it. XL and Jing immediately see that she is a woman in disguise. I think right there at the very beginning of the story, we see the seeds of the ending.

I agree with the internal struggle XY has between her heart and her mind. She's drawn to XY and also terrified of being close to him because of his power over her to hurt her. She's drawn to Jing and scared of the depth of his devotion to her. She says many times that she is heartless. And in a strange way, she is. She deceives herself too: she says she won't wait, and she waits for each of her three male leads (Fenglong sadly doesn't count here!) at various times in her life. She is the perfect embodiment of someone who has been traumatized by abandonment. So of course she can't understand her own feelings in love with either Jing or XL, because she is so afraid. She can't understand or see how XY is devoted to her too, although we all can see his devotion in his eyes. She is unable to read anyone's heart except Jing's for the longest time, including her own heart. The key moment is when she realizes that she hadn't believed in any relationship so far, so the failures were hers, too. Then she allows herself to really open up her heart and try.

I really like the points about the double meanings in LYF, which I agree with. There is also a lot of foreshadowing, and clues that XY misses especially with XL, because she doesn't understand love or romance. It's a language she doesn't understand. XL as a demon who has never loved, is able to show much more than she can, and by the time she starts to understand she can be loved (after meeting her parents) it's too late with XL. I'm going to cry again, XL's story always makes me weep!

I love this point, thank you for raising it. It has bothered me that when she puts off the wedding, it is strange because their being together has already been delayed by so many decades. You'd think she'd want to marry him right away. I wonder if a deeper subtext is, if she is waiting to see if XL will come back to her in some way? Even though she wants devotion, maybe not quite ready for just devotion (Jing) yet?