I agree with you 100%. A preference -- for whatever reason -- does not automatically translate into being phobic.
You've actually defended my statement...and defused your own. Physical attraction and attraction based on ones sexuality is not mutually exclusive.
The point you're kinda understanding is that preference is used when it's comes to things like height, and builds, etc. So yes it's fine to PREFER tall people, or people with long hair. That doesn't exclude people because your 'preference' can shift or your not beholden to only preferring tall people.
You are ignoring maybe not, that language changes and bigotry doesn't equal hate, in that 1:1 definition. It can also refer to hold predjudice against groups of of people who are not in the majority. Nor does it mean the 'hate' can be physical. The fact that she dismissed Pearls feelings as not valid is a hateful action because of her own internalised fear. To the point she ignores Pearl. It would be different if she was interested in Pearl because she didn like her look or her energy, but she choose to dismiss Pearl because she's thinks she has to compete with s man that doesn't exist and that is bi-phobia. The fear isn't invalid, it is irrational
Children, children. Behave or I will ground you both. You both have valid points. So can we just agree to disagree?…
I think we might be on the same page. I just clarifying that i also don't like like the gay becomes straight and to rebultle the comments of crescentmoon in terms of "it's BL" etc. We both seem to be speaking from personal experiences that hold merit to our statements that offer some common ground. Even though each is personal and effects us similarly/differently. I'm learning as well and as you being an ally, as i think you were conveying, t-hats great that you did the work to write solid characters, to represent a minority that you stand with. And i hope to continue to grow and learn. My observation could be overall wrong and that's fine it's mine and maybe, it will change. As it stands now yes Rico storyline is triggering cause he was coded gay, and people can change sexuality is fluid, the early comments made it seem of handed and that seemed careless, when we live in a hetero-normative world, so I won't apologise for that being a trigger of people being told maybe if you just tried not to be, to friends forced into therapy, to near suicides. I think BL is great and I gush at it, but I also realise and what people write off is that it is an opportunity for minorities to be represented as everyone else. With out shame and it's still in its early stages so of course it's far from perfect and it's saccharine, but it's growing and it can't stay static, it has to grow and learn like you or i. And it's fine that people want to just have fluff, i enjoy fluff, but soon it will have to acknowledge the door that it has opened. And fans have to acknowledge that queer people will flood to it because they will see a world that was thought impossible written by people like them or people who support them and not a fantasy for sexual kicks of Fujoshi's how ignore queer existence beyond their otp. So with that i am glad to see so much happening in the BL world and though it's shaky, i still like it and hope they will explore more beyond the binary in the coming years
Children, children. Behave or I will ground you both. You both have valid points. So can we just agree to disagree?…
I feel the same as a queer poc. I feel like the gay guy sleeps with girl or now he's not gay is a bit harmful, considering gayness/queer is still seen as a choice, and that people, a lot still believe it can be 'cured' but people sleeping with the opposite sex. So yo see it yet again is triggering. One the surface it can look innocentut there is a history that is tandem to it, that is ignored. Like with alot of things if you don't know the background of something that is triggering someone don't assume they are over reacting when they say, hey that's not cool. All that to say, i was thinking the same as you. Hopefully shows will just creat me bi/poly characters and increase the representation
I agree with you 100%. A preference -- for whatever reason -- does not automatically translate into being phobic.
Biggots who use 'preference' to be biggots. I've seen it, I've experienced it. So yes be VERY careful when you use that word when it concerns the LGBT community
Hello, I'm a guy so I might be interpreting some stuff wrong. I am concerned about people's reaction and hating…
That's still somewhat biphobia, her experience of her partner leaving her for a man has caused her to exclude a whole group of people for what? And using language such as choice and preference need to be used with a modicum of mindfulness. Preference as it is now is exclusitory language that says i don't like you because something inate about you that you can't change, but if I say it as 'preference' then it takes the onus off my biggotry. That's not to invalidate her fear or insecurities. She did choose however to string Pearl along knowing how Pearl felt. Only to attempt to step up only when she thought she might loose her, which is toxic because she hasn't dealt with her insecurities. Cause news flash, why is it different if she dates a lesbian, cause that partner could leave her for a another woman...and to argue well it's different makes it bi-phobic cause she is invalidating her partners sexuality based on her erroneous judgment and fear.
Why are they still giving this boy shows to be in? His character is terrible. So is he hooking up with the guy he cheated on his boyfriend with? If it isn't overly preachy like the last one itight be ok, at least
Propel in these dramas be quick to forgive folk and let them back into their lives after they get screwed over by said offender. It's all well and good to forgive, but it feels like taking that person back is saying hey i don't care you hurt me, and mine, you're back in my life, yay!
Surprised this plot was used. I'm pretty oh the problems. Not saying it doesn't happen, but I feel like this isn't really as horrible as it's made out to be especially since being attractive people get treated better as a whole. So as a non-conventionally attractive person i just don't agree with this POV.
Physical attraction and attraction based on ones sexuality is not mutually exclusive.
The point you're kinda understanding is that preference is used when it's comes to things like height, and builds, etc. So yes it's fine to PREFER tall people, or people with long hair. That doesn't exclude people because your 'preference' can shift or your not beholden to only preferring tall people.
You are ignoring maybe not, that language changes and bigotry doesn't equal hate, in that 1:1 definition. It can also refer to hold predjudice against groups of of people who are not in the majority. Nor does it mean the 'hate' can be physical.
The fact that she dismissed Pearls feelings as not valid is a hateful action because of her own internalised fear. To the point she ignores Pearl. It would be different if she was interested in Pearl because she didn like her look or her energy, but she choose to dismiss Pearl because she's thinks she has to compete with s man that doesn't exist and that is bi-phobia. The fear isn't invalid, it is irrational
Everything you said is all true!!
We both seem to be speaking from personal experiences that hold merit to our statements that offer some common ground. Even though each is personal and effects us similarly/differently.
I'm learning as well and as you being an ally, as i think you were conveying, t-hats great that you did the work to write solid characters, to represent a minority that you stand with.
And i hope to continue to grow and learn. My observation could be overall wrong and that's fine it's mine and maybe, it will change. As it stands now yes Rico storyline is triggering cause he was coded gay, and people can change sexuality is fluid, the early comments made it seem of handed and that seemed careless, when we live in a hetero-normative world, so I won't apologise for that being a trigger of people being told maybe if you just tried not to be, to friends forced into therapy, to near suicides.
I think BL is great and I gush at it, but I also realise and what people write off is that it is an opportunity for minorities to be represented as everyone else. With out shame and it's still in its early stages so of course it's far from perfect and it's saccharine, but it's growing and it can't stay static, it has to grow and learn like you or i. And it's fine that people want to just have fluff, i enjoy fluff, but soon it will have to acknowledge the door that it has opened. And fans have to acknowledge that queer people will flood to it because they will see a world that was thought impossible written by people like them or people who support them and not a fantasy for sexual kicks of Fujoshi's how ignore queer existence beyond their otp.
So with that i am glad to see so much happening in the BL world and though it's shaky, i still like it and hope they will explore more beyond the binary in the coming years
One the surface it can look innocentut there is a history that is tandem to it, that is ignored. Like with alot of things if you don't know the background of something that is triggering someone don't assume they are over reacting when they say, hey that's not cool.
All that to say, i was thinking the same as you. Hopefully shows will just creat me bi/poly characters and increase the representation
And using language such as choice and preference need to be used with a modicum of mindfulness. Preference as it is now is exclusitory language that says i don't like you because something inate about you that you can't change, but if I say it as 'preference' then it takes the onus off my biggotry.
That's not to invalidate her fear or insecurities. She did choose however to string Pearl along knowing how Pearl felt. Only to attempt to step up only when she thought she might loose her, which is toxic because she hasn't dealt with her insecurities. Cause news flash, why is it different if she dates a lesbian, cause that partner could leave her for a another woman...and to argue well it's different makes it bi-phobic cause she is invalidating her partners sexuality based on her erroneous judgment and fear.