idontwanttothanks

Does he? I'm not sure I think he's gone that far. That he's realized he's happy with Sand I get, but that he's *more* happy then with Mew? Debatable, especially when currently Mew is indulging his worst habits instead of criticizing him for them.

(I am aware he's an addict and that these aren't merely "habits". But for lack of a better one to use, I use that)

I like everything *but* the SandRay stuff lol, but as I've already explained it's just not my particular brand of messed up. 🤷‍♀️ But I'm having a lot of fun anyway.

He doesn't though. That's my point. He needs to let Sand go. Whether he decides to let Mew go, eh. He seems to really like hopelessly pining for a dude who doesn't want him.

Oh I really like Taikan Yoho. Japan is always good for that weird obsessive stuff - how do you feel about Utuskushii Kare / My Beautiful Man? That is one of my faves. 11/10, watch it all the time.

I think that's why I hate SandRay so much. Because i can very much see how it could be my thing, but Sand pining helplessly after Ray while Ray uses him is the wrong kind of toxic for me. I'd be more into it if they were mutually destroying each other but just watching one character be destroyed is a little too much. Doesn't help that said character is played by First, lol.

Yes I love his mom. They are great together.

I like the reactions i watch because they tend to be very grounded, and I am not - I feel like I get too involved sometimes in the fandom bs and the behind the scenes stuff, and then I watch these reactions and see how people who are just having fun and aren't tied into the reams of discourse react and it calms me down.

I definitely have to look into Psynergic because I bet he has stuff to say dealing with his degree.

Oh my gosh I totally forgot about Psynergic! I should go check his out.

I watch Deon Jackson, Shaqii, and ReactionsByJavi.

You know what's weird? I have been known to love toxic ships. Hannigram (Hannibal), Robron (Emmerdale, and specifically during the affair era), etc, Lilah/Wesley (AtS), Louis/Lestat (IWtV)...I could probably go on. All of them supremely messed up, all of them scratching a certain itch. They are *chef's kiss* to me.

But none of these are really hitting that spot. Although BostonNick does come close, haha, and it's probably why I ship it in spite of myself. I need Boston to start caring back though for it to really work - and we're so close!

He doesn't have to let Mew go. But he does have to let Sand go if he wants Mew. It's been made clear to him. So he should do that.

Ooh who are your favorites? I watch a few reactors every week too.

One of my favorite scenes from last ep was Sand leaving with Nick and tucking him into his shoulder.

Although I would like someone to comfort Sand for once please.

And I still want Sand and Nick to make out. At the very least.

Yeah I'm currently watching people on social media defend Ray chasing Sand all episode because "well technically he and Mew aren't even together" when they crucified Top for the same thing, AND Top had to be pushed into it. Like do they forget that Top didn't seek Boston out? Ray can't get his head out of Sand's ass in spite of claiming left and right he loves Mew but somehow Mew is the worst person. I bet that if Mew had kissed Top last ep people would be losing their shit. The double standard is insane.

Ray is mentally ill. That is true. But being mentally ill doesn't actually mean you get to go around treating people like shit and ignoring their boundaries and kissing people who don't want you to and trying to double dip when you KNOW neither of the people involved would be cool with it. There's stuff that his addiction and likely depression *does* explain. But not every fucking thing. Some of it is just Ray sucking.

And yeah, even Sand has fucked up and I wish he'd fuck up more lol. I'm ready for him to break out of his tired puppy in love with Ray mold. Come on Sand. Even Nick did some casual stalking and made himself a highly illegal sex tape (Nick is wild man).

I've rewatched ep 8 a few times, and I like rewatching the pool scene with Sand and Ray in ep 6 because I have never found Sand so hot as when he's being manipulative, lol.

But other than that I haven't rewatched any of it. I might do when it's all over but it really depends on if I like the ending or not.

I don't even think it's about being worthy, I just don't see Ray caring about him at all and it makes me cringe to see Sand still trying. But clearly he's gonna have to break his heart to figure that out. My hope is that it happens before episode 12 so we might get to see him heal a bit and maybe even move on.

Yeah exactly. And I have a lot of sympathy for Ray because some of the stuff he's doing, he genuinely can't help. But I dislike excusing his every single shitty action with 'well he's an addict and has mental health issues' because it's like...no, some of this is just generic shittiness, that we're seeing from other characters and that people are rightfully annoyed with those characters for. And that's when I start to lose my patience.

I enjoy all of these characters for feeling human, even when they're frustrating me. Maybe especially when they're frustrating me, lol. Like am I annoyed at Sand in the preview but also, sigh, he's gotta shoot his shot the same as Ray had to shoot his with Mew. Then Ray can break his heart and we can move the fuck on (I *want* Sand to break something for once but i think we all already know how this is gonna go, sigh again).

The thing is, even if Sand moves on *Ray isn't going to care*. He's in love with Mew and he's not gonna stop, at best he's gonna continue to use Sand as option number two because Mew? Ain't feeling it for Ray,. at least right now.

Like people keep saying Sand means so much but I don't see it. At all. I see Ray clinging to a person who makes him feel good and who he thinks belongs to him but I don't see Ray reciprocating in the least. He likes the attention. And I'm kind of tired of people acting like that's just fine when he's clearly doing to Sand what everyone is so mad about Mew doing to him. It's so hypocritical it makes me want to scream.

I swear to god if he does what I think he's going to next ep and I see people excusing it like they're already excusing him kissing Sand this ep (against his will I might add), I am going to lose my shit (not really I'm being dramatic but I will be irritated as hell).

And I'm honestly tired of people conflating the relationship with Mew with the drug use and the alcohol. When it comes to the *relationship*, Ray is using Mew's heartbreak to try to get a chance a much as Mew is using Ray to try to move past Top/piss him off. They both suck, even though I understand both of them.

When it comes to the drug and alcohol use, I don't blame Ray for Mew's actions because Mew is a whole ass adult who makes his own damn decisions and it annoys me when people can't accept that, both in the show and out of it. And he definitely shouldn't be partying with the addict, like what the fuck Mew. I genuinely don't think he'll spiral, but Ray has been spiraling nonstop and this is just going to make him worse.

And I want to clarify that I don't think that any of these guys are villains. Ray is an addict, and they are hard to deal with - this show is doing a great job of showcasing that through poor Sand. Literally every time they interact a little more of the light inside him visibly dies. Like I was just watching a bit of ep 4 today and I recalled how much I used to like them as friends. But Ray's set on a course of self destruction and while I desperately want to see some upward movement for him I want him to stop dragging Sand down with him. Sand can't be the one to help him. I think he should stick to Mew because Mew has enough emotional distance from Ray that he'll know when to back off for his own sanity. Sand doesn't have that. And Ray cares less about him than Mew so he's not gonna care that he's breaking him while he breaks himself.

I was talking about a First & Mix reunion. I want Mix to cameo and for his character to make out with Sand. Imagining it is not good enough.

That's nice. I still don't agree with you.

And sure, they include all that, but no one's wound up dead or in prison yet, so possibly they want the drama without the prison sentence. Just a thought. :D

What trailer? The mock trailer?

Oh he's definitely a creep. I am so excited.

He's going to be so awful and I honestly can't wait. I think it might be what I'm looking forward to most next week.