Randomlulu

I wonder how they managed to make it work for 2 years tbh I wonder if they were smooth or just full of fights. To me, the 2nd option might be closer to reality. Anyways, I hope Ep15 explains everything to us and I hope the direct reason of their break up is convincing. CHS giving her that look at the end of Ep 14, I think what happened was huge and hurt him a lot.

I love your post. As always. :')

In all honesty, knowing SongAh's workaholic nature and being the one who loves less, did you expect the long-distance relationship to work out?
By the way, I really want to thank you for your time to discuss this with me. :)

I'm really sorry about the genders thing. I thought you meant to do the gender comparison kdrama viewers do in situations like this. My bad.

There's a reason why many people think she's not doing much. She keeps doing what she likes when she feels like it. It's unfair to the partner.

Personally, I don't understand why such a big sacrifice has to be made in such a situation when they can only try to balance things. I don't like the fact that she's too invested in work that she thinks it's ok to sacrifice love. Just as much, I don't like the fact that he's too invested in love that he's losing himself little by little. Both of them need to tone down their investments in order to find balance and then happiness. They can get the best of both worlds if they find balance.

Obviously, our perspectives on this workvslove dilemma are very different. When you think love can be sacrificed for work even if it's unfair for the partner, I think that work can always be redeemed as long as I'm still young and active and skillful, however it's hard to redeem a heart. A disappointed broken heart especially if that heart has already given me everything. I can't take someone's efforts and feelings for granted, I feel responsible when I get too much love from them. As for work, I am always ready to sacrifice work if it means protecting a heart that I cherish.

Well, I think in this exact situation there's no right or wrong maybe, it's just a matter of personal opinion based on specific circumstances. That's what I concluded reading the discussions happening here. We're all projecting our own experience and pov on the situation in the drama. No one really is being objective. Haha

True that she wasn't thinking about going abroad when she stopped him from moving on but the way she's acting is unfair. She does what she wants when she feels like it. That's my problem with her.

She does care but honestly I can't feel it's out of love for some reason. I don't know if it's because I have seen too much from HS that I have high expectations from her or she herself is not doing enough to make this work. I'm still trying to figure this out.

About the mother, yes there I projected my way on her. Obviously, I would prefer to stay with my sick mother than taking a job opportunity abroad. I have a job here and I'm doing just great, why would I leave my sick mother.

No why would I feel offended? It's a discussion not a war lol Actually thx for your time to join the talk. :)

I second this. Let SongAh find her dream job and let HyunSeung find the love of his life and please I want a happy ending for the sister YeonSeung too.

Ok she can go take all the job opportunities she wants. I don't care anymore and I prefer they don't end up together. As I said in my original post, a good partner is equal to a good job opportunity to me and balance is the solution to get the best of both worlds. I think our perspectives are totally different. I'm not someone who prioritizes work over my loved ones' emotions because you can always redeem work but it's truly hard to redeem someone's heart. Job opportunities will always come to you when you maintain a certain level of professionalism and skills but a good partner? It's hard to find a good partner these days. I don't follow the "I don't need a man/love" trend, I prefer to have both work and love. I hope you understand where I come from.

It's really not a matter of genders here. It's a matter of context. We need to look at these characters as human beings regardless of their genders. Supporting female characters just because they are women is WRONG and hating on male characters just because they are men is WRONG too. Now, here's my answer to your question, if HyunSeung was the one going to Europe and leaving her for 5 years after he was the one who asked her not to be distant, I'd be upset too because I find this whole concept truly unfair to the partner.

No please. It has nothing to do with genders to be honest. Even if he was the one leaving to Europe after he had asked her not to be distant, I'd have been upset with him. It's not a matter of genders here, it's a matter of what's wrong and what's right and it seems that even the wrong and the right differ from a person to another and it's understandable. We are different in terms of personality & culture so we see things differently. Honestly, Kdrama fans recently have been truly harsh on male characters and always tend to excuse the female characters' actions. The day kdrama fans start taking sides regardless of the gender of the characters is the day I am looking forward to.

I'm not saying it's bad. I'm saying it's almost impossible to keep such a person's interest if she's distant from you. Workaholics tend to be completely disconnected from the world outside work. They do deserve love just like any other person but it's hard for them to keep in touch with the people around them so how do you think the situation would be if these people are actually far. Being a workaholic is one of the reasons I believe the break up happened when she was abroad. Ofc I could be wrong.

So you say it's perfectly fine to tell your partner not to give up on you and then at the very first job opportunity (that isn't that urgent) you leave him no matter the risks. Forget about her family and friends, I'm talking about the relationship here. Plus, I'm not that happy with her decision to leave her sick mother as well.
And ofc if HS did the same, I would be mad too. My problem is with the idea of leaving when you were the one who asked your partner not to be distant and when you were the one not putting much effort in the relationship.

Just because she told him her pov doesn't mean she's not selfish though. She is clearly selfish for just thinking that she could go abroad for five years and leave him behind. That's exactly selfishness. When she told him that, was she really giving him an option to leave? Does she really not know how attached he is to her and that he wouldn't give up on her that easily? It feels like she was trying to free herself from the guilt she felt after taking the decision to leave.

- True that it hasn't been a long time since she started seeing him romantically but is this really an excuse for her to not make any effort. All she's doing since the start of the relationship was to receive, she never took the initiative and she doesn'g even try to put herself in his shoes. Sometimes, it feels like HyunSeung in a one-sided relationship.

- The risk of a break up after a long-distance relationship is much higher than a normal relationship. There's this saying in my country: "Away from the eye, away from the heart". It explains perfectly how the spark fades away when in a long-distance relationship. Not to mention that she's a workaholic and this makes the risks even higher and that's why HyunSeung probably said that he wasn't confident about letting her go. He knows her nature. She gets too caught up in work and the project in Europe definitely would take too much of her time.
- She takes HyunSeung's pure love for granted. She needs to understand that HyunSeung is not her puppy whose one & only duty is to wait for her. He has a life too. He has feelings too. He's not HARU XD
I'm not saying she has to give up on her ambitions but she needs to be more realistic with her ambitions especially if she wants a serious relationship. Also, she's young and skillful at work and she's already receiving offers from the local cosmetics companies, she will definitely get a great offer one day. If you are going to be too ambitious, it's better not to be in a relationship at all (this applies to men and women).

- I'm not saying she doesn't care about him. She does care but I always feel that it's not out of love. Her actions are only making them more distant instead of getting them closer. Is this her effort to make things work between her and HyunSeung.

- Because she feels bad for him, she breaks up with him after all the efforts? Just to get rid of the guilt she's feeling for not loving hkm enough, she decided to break his heart? That's even worse and selfish.

- At the end, I don't care anymore if they end up together or not. I want them to go in separate ways. She can go work all she wants and fulfill her ambitions and HyunSeung can find someone who loves him wholeheartedly as he deserves.

A long-distance relationship with a workaholic is almost impossible tbh esp for such a long time. I saw the break up coming and I'm honestly surprised that it lasted for 2 years. It seems their break up happened because of her, judging from HyunSeung's face and reaction when he saw her. And yes I wouldn't be surprised if it really was.
Freedom to walk away? Does she really not know that it's not easy for him to walk away even he wants to? That's my problem with SongAh, she doesn't consider his feelings at all and just does what she wants. Remember what he told her? "Do I have to accept your decisions?" I was so happy when he said that.

So SELFLESSNESS is the family trait of the CHAEs. I want to give HyunSeung & YeonSeung a big hug. Both of them are just full of love.

It's time for HyunSeung to love himself before anyone else. That last scene of Ep14 was pure torture.

The last part yes. I hope they go in separate ways. I don't care anymore if they end up together. SongAh obviously doesn't want to do any effort to love HyunSeung enough. She wants work. That's really okay. HyunSeung really has a big heart and he deserves to be loved wholeheartedly. Lowkey wishing he would end up with his short-haired best friend SeRim.

LONG POST WARNING! SKIP IF YOU WANT!

I have a few things to say about the FL SongAh and I hope whoever reads this takes into consideration that it's my point of view and I'm not forcing it on you. I'm open for enlightning discussions.

1- FL is being truly selfish in this relationship from the very start. First, she told the ML not to give up on her when he was trying to move on her. She gave him hope when he lost it which I always thought it was a wrong move from her because she wasn't sure of how she felt towards him. I think she was selfish too when she thought she could take such a big decision as leaving to a foreign country for 5 years without asking for her partner's thoughts nor considering his feelings. The moment he told her that he wanted to date her during all the seasons of the year and she just nodded. She made him look like a fool dreaming and planning for the future of their relationship while her mind was actually busy thinking about the possibility of leaving him for 5 years. That was hard to watch tbh. That moment too when she told him it was not necessary to tell him about the Europe project because she didn't make a decision yet was also very harsh from her. How is that not necessary when it's gonna affect both of you. Him being a MAN gives no one the right to step on him especially that he's been nice and honest with her the whole time. Whether you like it or not, being in a relationship is different from being single which means your partner has a say in your decisions as well because they will affect both of you not just you. She is being selfish by being too ambitious as well. She has her dreams? Ofc but you are in a relationship, not only your dreams matter but also the dreams of your partner especially if you take your relationship seriously and not just as a temporary one. You can be ambitious but try to be realistic with your ambitions because you are now responsible for two not just for yourself. She is a workaholic, she is work-oriented, she prioritizes work, YES, she's all of that but then again her partner who has always been supportive & loving deserves some attention & affection too. It just hurts to see that she was the one who gave him hope but also the one taking it away from him when she felt like it. It's unfair & mean.

2- Is it just me or SongAh is always the one receiving the love but not the one giving that love. I'm starting to doubt that she loves him tbh. Maybe she only likes him because he was always the one by her side in her down moments. I can't feel her love. Not yet. She doesn't expect anything from her boyfriend, she doesn't take the initiative at all, he is the one who always asks for a hug or a kiss or comfort or praise, she doesn't do that on her own. Also the way HyunSeung Is always cautious around her makes me feel uncomfortable. He still called her Sunbae because she couldn't get used to the drop of honorifics. He always asks for her permission to do anything, I mean when she told him about the previous job offer he was surprised him that she allowed him to give his opinion on the matter. The wall between her and him is still there even if not as high as before. Plus, does she even know what he likes & he dislikes? Does she even have the interest to get closer to his family? I don't think so. Sometimes, she feels so uninterested in anything related to him, I don't know what's keeping her from making efforts to get to know him better.

3- She said: "She wouldn't risk everything for love" and he accepted by saying he would be the one sacrificing everything for love. However, is she really going to watch him do all the work just because he said that? Is she really going to take advantage of his selflessness to do whatever she wants?

4- I know many female viewers tend to hate men in general and definitely loved the fact that she prioritized her work over her relationship with a man. However, I think finding a good man is equal to a good job opportunity. HyunSeung is obviously a good man and he's family-oriented & a very supportive boyfriend. He respects her as a woman and that's the most important. It's not true that work wouldn't hurt you like love. No matter how much you love your work, there will always be days where work will slap you in the face and tire you emotionally & physically and you will feel like quitting. Honestly, when it comes to work & love, all you have to do is to find balance. You don't have to cancel any of them to feel happy. Balance is the key of happiness.

Please, note that I like SongAh and I do admire her strong personality but she isn't a saint you know. Being strong & independent doesn't mean stepping on the emotions of your loved ones. Being selfish doesn't really mean you are strong. Prioritizing your love & partner isn't a sign of weakness as well. BALANCE IS STRENGTH.

Off topic, I feel so bad for YeonSeung. The way she's treated by everyone around her is just painful. Her husband never loved her, her siblings always exclude her from their conversations and keep secrets from her, her daughter kinda looks down on her for being a housewife and the chef deceives her and she has no friends at all because her family is her only interest. It just breaks my heart to see her perfect world falling apart and no one seems to care. I'm especially disappointed with her siblings who ignored her pain and never checked up on her after that scene in the restaurant. I hope they change their attitude towards her. She is their sister not a stranger.

He's always been the one sacrificing in this relationship. Did she ever sacrifice anything? Plus, you are missing the fact that she's a workaholic so imagine what would happen to their little spark of love when she gets too caught up in work and stays away for 5 years. And wouldn't he be even "creepier" if he suggested to go with her just because he loved her.