Suliabryon

I'll send you a friend request and a message. If you want, I'll send you a heads up after I watch each ep. I don't mind.

FWIW, I think the show is absolutely amazing. It's really layered and nuanced and they don't shy away from the things that make the characters broken, and they allow people to get justifiably angry and have real emotional responses to the messed up things that have happened so far.

If it gets too much, maybe you could have someone tell you what section of an episode to skip. There is a small non-con event in episode 3, for example, that starts around the 26 minute mark and ends around the 28 minute mark. I don't think it will trigger you since you're willing to try after hearing about the more egregious stuff, but just in case.

Oh, yes, 100%. It's early days yet but these two may just become my favorite BL pairing so far because of Bank, honestly. But they have great chemistry and the dynamic really, really, REALLY works.

Sooo...I don't know how bad it will be in the show. But in the book....yes, there is SA and grape. Um...one of the key scenes and pivotal moments in the show is a physical fight between the leads that then changes to grape, and it hasn't happened yet on the show. But in the novel, they were BOTH while still angry and still fighting, making either s3xual overtures or s3xual threats...and then yes the grape happens. To be clear, I think angry/hate s3x was always going to happen, but it becomes grape when one character forces the guy who is normally always a top into the position of bottom. It's definitely grape, though, and there is physical violence.

And later in the novel another character grapes one of the leads out of anger and jealousy, and IDK if that scene will be included in the show because it's pretty dark and also touches on themes of incest.

Ha ha ha! Sure! I can always message you my FB handle if you want. Although...I don't talk about BL openly there because I don't want the family dinner conversations that would bring. They already think I'm a little crazy for my k-pop obsession (which I DO post about a lot). BUT I do chat about it over messenger and in groups.

😂 Right?? IDK, I'm an author and even though I don't write dark romance, I have friends who do and I am VERY AWARE of the genre and it's crazy popularity. It is a thing. In fiction. That people enjoy safely because it is FICTION.

And feel free to chat with e about specific scenes if you want because I am OBSESSED with this drama already. I spoiled myself and then started reading the novel and I think if the show does this right this drama is going to be spectacular. After today's scene, I have complete faith that the drama will capture the scene where Yok assaults Ing with all of the emotional layers the novel had.

I think the novel's strength (and the show so far!) is that it doesn't pretend these things are something they're not. It was very clear today that Ing was crossing a line and what he did was SA and non-consent and wrong. And we got to see how he twisted it in his mind to justify it. And we got to see Yok's complicated response. First of all, he enjoyed that. He didn't grab Ing's hair and try to yank him off. He grabbed his hair in a moment of being totally swept up in what was happening. In the novel, we have the benefit of the exposition telling us how as a young, inexperienced man, it's only natural that he wouldn't be able to effectively resist and that he would be completely -if against his will - caught up in what Ing - a VERY experienced man - was doing. In the show, we have to rely on the actors to convey all of that.

And NONE of that changes the fact that he told Ing no, and that what Ing did was unequivocally wrong.

Yok's anger afterward is so justified. And you can see in Banks' performance Ing's nerves about it. He KNOWS he was wrong. He KNOWS he crossed a line he can't undo. He's arrogant and selfish and trying to play it off, but he knows. I hope they bring all of that to the table again later when Yok assaults Ing as well. I'm sure they will.

I'm just going to gush about the acting for a bit, but particularly Bank. I might be just a little bit in love with him. Ing is absolutely a red flag. There is no question. and yet Bank gives him all of these lovely layers and nuance. One of Ing's defining characteristics is that he takes care of his family. Like, he may dislike them. He may hate his "stepmother" who in his mind usurped his mother's place. But he will financially support them. He will protect them from outsiders. We haven't quite seen all of that in the show yet, but there have been hints in the way that Yok manages to get him into doing things for Itt that Ing would normally never do. Going to his birthday party, telling him Happy Birthday. Yes, he's doing that in part because he's completely enamored with Yok and wants to seduce him, but he's also doing it because Yok is manipulating those family strings that Ing just can't quite cut.

I think Bank is capturing that beautifully. Ing is f**cked up. He's the kind of guy you warn everyone to stay away from. But look at how he interacts with his secretary. She is CLEARLY not afraid of him at all. Why? Because she's worked with him long enough to know that beneath that devil-may-care, arrogant, selfish exterior is actually someone who cares very much. Someone who protects and takes care of his people. His Grandfather, too, you can see the love between them in their interactions.

I think Yok sees it, too, and it's messing with him. He hates Ing. He's arrogant, he treats Itt, who Yok likes, like crap, he seduces young men, he doesn't take no for an answer, he is the MOST shameless person. But he also cares, and I think a little bit of Yok that he doesn't want to acknowledge yet sees a side of Ing that he likes. Copter is doing a fine job playing Yok very closed off, because there are sides to Yok we haven't seen yet. I think most people have picked up on the anger simmering inside of him. Maybe on the calculation. Copter is keeping things ambiguous and I understand why.

But the true standout here is Bank. His acting experience really shows in the subtle things he does. The little expressions, gestures, body language choices. The way you can tell Ing is trying to reel himself in but failing because he can't control his desires. The scene today when he's deciding whether to disrobe Yok, and then whether to assault him (let's call it for what it is here) is a stellar, standout example. In the beginning of the scene, he's just helping Yok, depositing him drunk in his room to sleep it off. But step by step, we see him slide from the annoyed, reluctant helper to being entirely self serving, until nothing matters but getting what he wants. "I'll just take off your shoes." He goes to leave, but does a 180 and talks himself into taking off Yok's shirt, too. He even twists it to being a good deed. "I'm already playing the good guy, I might as well go all the way." He knows he's not doing this out of some altruistic motive, but he's already voicing his excuses to both Yok and himself out loud, trying to create a senseless justification to do what he wants. First, it's just removing Yok's clothes. Then it's kissing him. Then it's more. By the time he's pinning Yok's hands and telling him "Just let me have this. I can't take this anymore," the justifications have vanished completely, and instead he's twisted this into something Yok somehow owes him. After, he says "Now we're even." Even for what, exactly? There is no scoreboard that can possibly balance the scales of what Ing did here, and even if he doesn't know it, this moment is what opens the door to what happens later, to him. (Novel spoiler, so I won't go into detail.)

At this point in the story, we don't have a love story. We don't have anything but disdain, hatred, attraction, and desire. Every move Ing has made with Yok has been calculated and self serving. Although it isn't yet apparent, every move Yok has made regarding Ing is equally self serving. He didn't become his assistant to learn business. He isn't playing this game for any reason but his own motives and active hatred for Ing. (Novel spoiler territory, so I'm being intentionally vague.) Yet, underneath this mutual exploitation and contempt is attraction. Ing has wanted Yok since the first moment he saw him, and it's intense enough and he's selfish enough that he won't let it go. Yok is unwillingly attracted to Ing. He despises him, but some part of him is also attracted to some degree.

I think that just makes what happened worse. His anger is so visceral and justified.

I think both Bank and Copter are doing SUCH an amazing job here, and if that continues as the story gets into the more intense and emotional aspects....this drama is going to really be something special.

I got into BL as a genre earlier this year watching Deep In, and it pulled me in in a very similar way, because of the complexity of the characters and layers of what was happening. Apparently I have a story type I really gravitate to, because this is it.

I've loved some sweet and fluffy or rom-com type dramas as well, so it's not like I'm ONLY invested in the toxic ones, but man...when they are well done, I'm here for this kind of emotional trauma, angst, and mutual destruction leading EVENTUALLY to love.

You want spoilers from the novel? It's dark. Yes, he is an absolute, black flag.

Because people came into this unfamiliar with the source material and don't understand that every major character in this drama is AT BEST a red flag. Go down thread and you'll find people complaining about "toxic" and "non-con".

I have news for these people. They should just walk away. Drop it now. Because this is just the beginning.

Accurate! 😂

Right? I like both! I pretty much love all genres of romance if it's done well. It can be sweet. It can be toxic and dark. I loved ThamePo (sweet), but my first BL was Deep In and that show had me in a chokehold.

Honestly, nothing is more satisfying than deeply broken characters who almost destroy themselves and each other but somehow grow and love and come out the other side deeply in love.

I'm literally just going to start blocking negative people on this site, honestly. I am new to BL, and I thought the mainstream, regular c-dramas had toxic, negative fans, but EVERY single BL show I come here and it's a sea of haters in the comments picking apart whatever it is they don't like about this or that. "Bad acting" "toxic scenes" "just a rip off of *insert other BL title here*. What happened to if you don't like it, don't watch? And certainly don't come and comment to yuck other people's yum!

Like, I GET IT if someone was SUPER looking forward to something and came in expecting the promise of a pilot and then it turns out nope, the actual show is nothing like that and they're crushed and want to talk about it. But it's almost NEVER that, and almost ALWAYS someone hating on a storyline, an actor, etc. And I'm over it.

ALL OF THIS.

I'll be honest, I came into this drama after loving the trailer and then listening to someone break down everything that happens in the novel, and I have to tell you, I'm not sure I'll make it the whole way through if they stick to ALL of the things that happen in the novel, because...yeah Yok is a wolf in sheep's clothing and a total black flag, not to mention the brother. NO ONE in this story is an innocent lamb, that's for sure! And I am someone who doesn't mind a "toxic" or "red flag" character. I'm fine with scenes like what happened in ep 3. I'm fine with what I call dub-con as long as its clear both characters actually get into it. I can work with that. BUT. What happens in the novel? 😬 I guess this drama is going to test my limits, but if I have to tap out I'm not going to come here and cry about it. I knew what I was getting into.

So rare to see a BL actually address ANY OF THE THINGS, and this one addressed like, multiple.

The true definition of a power bottom.

Me watching this episode pretty much almost the entire twenty minutes: 🫢😮🫢😮🫢

I'm pretty new to BL and NOTHING I've seen so far prepared me for this.

Fool In Love is MUCH better than this so far. I mean...I'll watch both, but yeah. I am mostly here at this point for Fort and Peat.

On their second year anniversary of dating, Gear plans a surprise for his boyfriend - it's implied to surprise is going to be "giving himself" to him, but since he has a cute little box as a present, I'm not sure if a note was in or what. Gear is a virgin, and has always believed s3x should be special, so he wanted to wait until the right time. But, his BF Kim shows up to break up, and he brings along the guy he's been sleeping with, who DELIGHTS in telling Gear all of the reasons Kim, the BF, wants to break up. (Gear wouldn't sleep with him, he's boring, a terrible kisser, basically he stands there and mocks Gear while the scumbag BF looks on.)

In the wake of this, Gear and his two BFFs go out to a club drinking. Gear has decided he'll show his ex just how exciting he can be to prove him wrong, so he's planning to sleep with someone that night.

Kanthi is a VIP at this club. He knows the owner(s), he's a regular - handsome, arrogant, picks up guys effortlessly. Gear notices him right away but pretends like he's not interested while his two BFFs explain what a red flag Kanthi is. Meanwhile, another VIP of the club - only VIPs have "black cards" giving them access to the upstairs rooms, important for hooking up, I guess - starts flirting with Gear, who is getting progressively more drunk. He gives him a black card with a room # on it and asks if he wants to go upstairs, then heads up telling Gear to come up when he's ready.

One of Gear's friends, Jay, is knocked into by a waiter at the club, spilling a drink, and the two almost come to blows before fellow employees drag the waiter away. Once Gear decides to go upstairs, Jay notices the waiter glaring at him from across the room. When the guy leaves, Jay follows him outside to confront him again, but - surprise! - the two actually know each other and are dating! The fight was a sham, because dating customers is NOT allowed. Jay tells Nu (the waiter) that there are no rules against f***ing customers, and they get to it right there in the alley.

Meanwhile, upstairs Gear enters the wrong room. Inside isn't the guy who gave him the black card, it's Kanthi, who is dressed only in a pair of VERY SMALL undies, waiting for the guy he picked up earlier to come join him. He clocks right away that Gear is in the wrong place and tells him to leave, saying he's not ready for any of this. Gear finds his backbone and asks Kanthi to teach him about s3x. There is some banter back and forth, they kiss, and Kanthi declares that Gear can't even kiss properly. He has no interest in teaching him. Humiliated, Gear, leaves. In his haste, he drops a heart locket? Necklace? That Kanthi seems to recognize when he picks it up and returns it to him. (I'm not sure if I missed the significance of this elsewhere in the episode or not. I skipped ahead on some of the REALLY humiliating moments Gear went through.) Gear goes home and cries.

Once Gear's friends find out his night was a bust, they download a dating app for him and tell him to swipe right on everyone - young, old, everyone. He needs to date because his scumbag ex and the cheater jerk he's with keep parading around at their university in front of him.

Gear accepts a date with one of the guys on the app he's been chatting with and the two meet up at the club for a drink. Except the guy is a catfish. He looks NOTHING like his dating app photo and is actually old, short, and balding. Gear is too nice to completely ditch him, but manages to tell the guy he's not interested in dating him.

Unfortunately, one of Gear's idiot friends let slip to the ex and the cheater that Gear had a hot date at the club - he wanted them to see Gear moving on and being with someone better than the ex. So they show up with friends to find Gear still chatting and sharing a drink with this guy.

By this time, Kanthi is also at the club and witnessing much of this go down. After the ex and cheater move on, Gear, humiliated and hurting, starts downing drinks. Kanthi sees Old Dude spike his drink with something and intervenes, confronting the guy and having him kicked out of the club. It's a nice "save the cat" moment to redeem his arrogant, selfish seeming character that we've seen so far.

Now drunk, humiliated, hurting, Gear is NOT in the mood for the dressing down Kanthi gives him about safety and what could have happened. He scathingly tells Kanthi if it happens again, not to bother saving him, and stumbles out of the club - right into the ex and cheater. Crying, he begs to know what he did so wrong, why doesn't Kim (the ex) love him? What makes Sand (the new cheater guy) so much better. They humiliate him again, leaving him crying on the ground as they saunter away and out of the club.

Gear has truly hit rock bottom . He's a drunk, broken mess. Kanthi appears and offers him a helping hand up.

Episode ends.

It SOUNDS super depressing, and it was. But the trailer for the next ep looks promising with the story moving forward and most importantly for me - we get our first glimpse of Fort as the club's Big Boss and he looks HOT.

Do you want me to write you a quick recap so you know what happens?

Well, the ex-BF Kim is a REAL winner, isn't he?? What an a-hole.

Gear doesn't understand that he dodged a bullet and his scumbag ex did him a favor by showing who he really is...I mean, he already DID show him, but Gear wasn't paying attention. No means no, scumbag.

Honestly, this opening episode was a really hard watch for me. I get secondhand embarrassment really easily and it's always hard for me to watch characters like Gear who make bad choices for the wrong reasons and it puts them in a place of being even more vulnerable than they were before. This ENTIRE EPISODE was Gear making one humiliating choice after another. It was very hard to watch. OTOH, it was a VERY realistic example of what a lot of people do after having their heart ripped out by someone they loved, AND humiliated on top of it! Poor Gear's self-esteem took a terrible hit at the same time that his heart was broken.

And what is UP with those friends of his??? All they did was reinforce the crap his ex said to him! Like, okay...I get that two years is a long time to date someone without sleeping with them, but the there is a REASON why Gear never felt comfortable being vulnerable with Kim. That guy is a real piece of work. From the example we saw, there was no reassurance, no acceptance, no LOVE AND CARING that would have made Gear WANT to have s3x with him. Instead, it felt very transactional. "Hey, I gave you a hand j**, now let me have s3x with you." No? Nah, I'll just ignore that and keep on like you didn't say anything. Multiple times. Until Gear had to physically kick him away.

Um, no thanks.

But Gear's friends basically call him boring and push him to become someone else and have s3x with a stranger. Okay. I feel like someone who wanted s3x to feel special (and the way that happens is by having an emotional connection with your partner!) isn't going to have a good time with a one night stand. I'm just saying.

And then watching Gear be humiliated AGAIN in front of his ex and the new cheater scumbag BF..and then chase after them, drunk, and beg that piece fo trash to take him back? *winces*

Oh, Gear.

I can't wait to move past this era of heartbreak and on to his shiny new bad-idea relationship with a red flag. 😂

I hope it happens quickly so I can have less secondhand embarrassment next episode. I will say Fort looks FINE as the big boss and I cannot wait for whatever storyline awaits with him and Peat.