grapejuice

I wonder how she could choose not to live in a feudalist society? There's no escaping it. And, for her, she's now a Lin like it or not. She has nowhere to go. And she is doing what she can to improve the lives of people she actually knows. One at a time, where she can.

And they are forgetting the play that she wrote; the one that describes the lives of women. Do critics not think that risking imprisonment to write something like that is enough? And she would have done more in that vein (and may still do). Women everywhere got together in groups to watch it and, who knows, a few men may have seen it too.

OMG FINALLY I hear somebody say it ... it's a humanist perspective ... humanizing women ... !!!!!!!!! yes !!!

Please please please. Can you talk real loud and often so that people can really hear you.

I'm awfully curious why you are commenting here if you aren't even watching. What are you watching that isn't good enough to draw you to that comment page?

People seem to have forgotten that there was no birth control back then. Having sex meant family and maybe a lot of it.

So, maybe she was thinking about that too. I mean would she want to bring a child into his family when he was still in the Emperor's line of fire? Is she going to risk losing a boy to death or exile? Is she going to ask a daughter to choose death over prostitution?

Sex may have seemed a safer option as soon as he left the court and capital.

FL is not the romantic type. Not all women are. Nor should we be. Some of us just don't believe the hype.

We learn to look down on women ... We learn it from men and from society at large. Day after day from birth so we absorb it subconsciously and then we, very unfortunately, turn it on each other.

I like the fact that he has always been able to flout conventions and do things that other men of his station wouldn't do.

He lost his brother, which I think hit him hard, and he may know more than other men about the fact that childbirth is awfully damn dangerous (in those days).

Besides, his wife sat with him in subzero temperatures for 36 hours when he was injured so he probably thought he should sit with her too.

And I liked his observation at the end, that childbirth was like a woman's battlefield, facing possible death like a soldier ... or words to that effect. It's another shared experience for them to understand each other better.

You didn't put it badly. I liked how you said it. And I liked the idea.

When was it spelled out? Or made explicit in the dialogue? I think the drama does show rather than tell very well. That was true at the beginning and there still isn't any sermonizing Just plot points.

edit/add
We've seen women, the poor slaves (and men at war) suffer in a lot of the ways that would have been the case in real life. Not having choice. Not having rights. Not having a way out. Not having assurances that they wouldn't be cast out into poverty and homelessness. Death by wealthy persons whim. Death by illness or injury. Death in childbirth.

The writers have shown this in different situations but they haven't made a habit of spelling things out for us. It's plain to see so they've shown instead of telling. They've left a lot for us to figure out for ourselves.

In fact there's been quite a lot of criticism that they haven't made things clear enough sometimes, or drawn things out long enough for us to really get and appreciate what we've seen.

So, can it be both?

the writers have trusted us to understand a lot. they haven't talked down to us like children

Were those things that he saw being done to his wife and first newborn child? Makes all the difference ...

I can't watch operations or childbirth without feeling physically ill. Am I a wimp too?

The general would have removed the heads of enemies and watched the blood flow out of traitors. Watching someone you know or love in great pain with a gush of blood and goo coming out wouldn't be nearly the same thing. It's hard to watch someone you love suffer no matter who you are.

Yes, you're right, and it was an extended meeting where he acted on her ideas and was impressed. Yes. It's time for a rewatch. And come to think of it, he may not have seen her after the library incident but the scholar told the story about a maid who knew hexagrams to every one in order to save her. Grandfather probably took note of that. And he may have put 2+2 together over the painting and her father being about her too.
So, maaaaaybe.

They think he's acting too feminine? Haha. Like ... he stopped strutting with sword in hand and his boys in tow ... and he cried at his mothers deathbed and he attended the birth of his daughter but couldn't stand seeing the pain and blood and fainted?

That last part kills me a bit. I read someone saying that there's no way a tough general who is used to severing heads with blood spraying everywhere ... would faint like that.

But generals come home with PTSD and they aren't cutting off the heads or witnessing the bloody deaths of women that they love. Huge difference watching someone you love in pain as opposed to some enemy you don't know or you even hate.

Anyway, ty for filling me in. I guess his repertoire of mannerisms has widened but I don't see that he lost all the old tougher ones in the process.

I love this comment.

I had to look up if there is a male equivalent to the "too perfect, too smart" Mary Sue and apparently there is ... the Gary Stu was invented to counter the Mary Sue ... or you call the man who's too smart a Mary Sue as well"

But do you ever hear it? I mean, have you ever heard a ML called Mary Sue or Gary Stu? No. Not ever. But around here, our FL is so often called a Mary Sue.

Also I appreciate your calling people out for judging the drama with a cultural template that only recognizes certain kinds of affection. I'm seeing a lot of people judging dramas based on whether or not they provide what the audience needs, wants and feels entitled to but you're right that these feelings of entitlement a little too ethnocentric.

Plus, there's another thing that I noticed that kind of falls into the same category. People who are not aware of Buddhist values are calling out the writer for being too feminist when really a lot of what we're seeing is era-appropriate Buddhist humanist ideology and practice as opposed to being anachronistic feminism.

Either way, I totally agree about people's judgements. I really wish people would let go enough to experience and then judge what's there rather than what they want to be there.

omg ! you're right ! I guess he wouldn't have met her when she was a servant. and he doesn't much care about anything anymore least of all meeting her now. He's an odd character really, hardly interacts with anyone. Just stays in his study painting the same things over and over again. Kinda sad.

It's true. There's so much to inspire us in this FL but people are unhappy with her a lot of the time. She was too timid. She's too perfect. Too smart. She doesn't forgive and forget and fall in love with the ML. She''s cold and lacks passion. She's not in love with him or she's not in love with him enough or in the right way. And she has emasculated him.

Woah. That's quite a lot and I'm not sure that it's accurate or fair ... but even if it were to be true ... look what she's been through. Look at what she's lost. It's not that hard to understand or extend some empathy or sympathy. Especially since she has come to terms with it all and is still a kind person willing always to help others.

The ML is already as heroic as they come; saving the Emperor and the nation, twice. So, he gets to reincarnate well with all kinds of good karma for his next life and I think he kind of deserves a peaceful retirement since he was almost fatally injured.

Being Commander of the Left Army would have been boring in peacetime. Being at court would have been both boring and stressful. Dangerous but in a boring kind of way.

So, I guess the author could have thrown him out there to fight in more battles and win more accolades ... but would that have been a good idea for the character or the story? He may have to fight again but at his age with so many prior injuries, it will likely kill him.

And I guess he could have stayed at court into his old age but it's a huge theme of the drama that this is a dangerous pursuit; getting too close to the seat of power. Grandfather didn't want him there for good reason and LX had plenty of reason not to like it either. Plus he knew himself that it was a huge risk. He only ended up there in the first place because he was in the right place during a couple of big moments. It wasn't deliberate ambition that put him there.

So, the problem is that he is now only the patriarch of his family and he is too in love with a woman who doesn't show him as much affection as he shows to her?

Which raises the question, what could or should the author do to make him look less docile and wimpy? Make him less in love? He had to be that in love to bring the FL back into the Lin household. Make the FL more in love? Mmmm. Everyone would love this but ... would that solve the 'problem' and ... reasons.

So, they should take him out and put him in danger again? We may not be able to keep him at all if that happens.

I wonder if Grandfather Lin knows who our girl really is. He hasn't seen much of her since he keeps to himself, living deeply in his memories and regret. But he's no fool and his grandson's behavior might have made him wonder, if he hadn't already. Probably not, he wouldn't want to know for all kinds of reasons. But it's interesting to wonder.

did they actually meet?