twinty

I hope the director knows what we want 🙏

I keep thinking this torture will end with the next episode but I watched the preview of ep 12. The other night I watched an episode before bed and I had a nightmare.

I feel he was attracted to her, so he was the first to initiate a meeting after he rejected her request for an interview. I feel he cares for her. He cannot be faking all the things he does for her. It cannot all be an act. He got me when he turned off the AC, so I am going to keep believing that he loves her in some way. I am praying nothing happens between him and Fang Lei.

For someone who was precise in everything she did with the fake parents, she must have been in some state of denial to not see as someone in the public eye whether it be through her work or her husband's status, that the lie was not going to stay buried in the country side. She not only lacked love from her parents, but she was also emotionally abused by her parents' bias. They never saw her needs. I can understand this deep emotional need to be loved so much so she would deny in her mind that someone is going to reveal the truth about her parents. Therefore, I feel that her decision to enter this deception came also from her emotional need to be loved by someone who would make her a priority. Turning off the AC just for her was a start 😂

I watched all the teasers. I don't know if I can survive the stress. I don't remember when I have ever felt this level of stress watching a drama. The director knows what he is doing.

Thank you!

I didn't click on the links earlier. I kept getting distracted or it could be avoidance of anxiety😂 I had to scroll by all the comments to get back to you. Going to watch the links now. But wait. I just realized these are 11 and 12.

I watched 11 and 12. I was not expecting this. Didn't know that guy existed.

That "yet" isn't helping my anxiety! 😂

Yes! It all went to fast. I was look for some stills of both the wedding gown and the after gown.

Same 😩

I second the Reset recommendation. I pulled an all nighter watching Reset!

There are moments I wish I had waited for more episodes. Which episode do you think this will. happen?

This looks as if he walked away from her because of her lies. This is better than she leaving him because he cheated as some novel readers stated. I am hopeful the drama keeps that out.

I believe that Xu Yan's love for Shao Ming was real from the beginning. It is just that she held a part of herself back because her parents made her feel she was never their priority. But Haoming showed Xu Yan care that she never got from anyone else but her grandma. In him, she saw someone who could give her the love she wanted. He was also protective of her, even if he had his own motives. Maybe it is my romantic thinking, but I feel they both care. But neither of them is fully open to the other. Xu Yan has been through emotional trauma with her parents; she is not going to trust him if he betray her in any way.

I can also understand Haoming not believing she truly loved him at first. But there were moments when she showed her vulnerability, and he comforted her, so there must be a part of him that felt her love or her emotional need.

I am talking more about how she came to feel this way. What happens next will not change this.

This is my point. I am thinking in terms of the mental anguish she felt as a child. The last straw was when her father wanted to take away her right to an education. She put up a mental block against her parents and the only thing she had physical control over was her right to change her name at 18 👏It was symbolic of her turning away from them. I don't blame her for not wanting them in her life.
As for Hao Ming, I believe he does have feelings for her. The way he treats her cannot all be an act. Sigh... My heart wants this to be true😭 He was genuine when they went to see her grandma. But Xu Yan is also holding back from him. Hopefully, the truth will set them free. And the truth will set us free! This is more stressful than a murder drama!

Now I am going to have to watch that part again at slower speed!

This is all revealed in the first few minutes of episode 1 so I don't think it is spoiler.

When I think about it, is Xu Yan so wrong in lying about her parents?

Xu Yan said, "The first time I fabricated my life was in my notebook." She wrote that she had the most loving parents and that she was the apple of their eye. Can you imagine how she felt as a child, feeling that they didn't care about her? Her child's mind had to find a way just to survive the pain of not being wanted.

She also said, "The second time I fabricated my life was on my ID." She was 18 years. By now, she realized she couldn't fool herself into believing that her parents loved her. I don't blame her for changing her name to her grandmother's name. She basically hardened her heart toward her parents. Who would want to keep feeling the pain of having parents who didn't care?

Then she said her goal in life was to give her grandmother a better life. This is a good thing. It is amazing that she studied hard to be at the top, to get into a top university, and to build a life for herself. Some would have just wallowed in self-pity.


By the time she meets Hao Ming, and it's time to meet the family, those "parents" who didn't care about her didn't exist for her. I don't blame her for not acknowledging her biological parents. I am not saying it is right to lie. But in her mind, they were not her parents. It is her defense system shutting them out. They caused her so much pain. Is Xu Yan really so wrong? I know it is a stressful mess, but aside from the hired parents, who can blame her for blocking out the real ones?

I keep forgetting to mention how beautiful she looked in her wedding gown. And I also loved the gown she wore after.

Good point. I am so nervous. I hope he does the right thing.