Hi Bye

I wanted to talk about the title a little bit.

I'm learning Japanese and I'm a newbie but I know that :
utsukushii means beautiful
Kare means "he" (a male person) and sometimes people use kare to refer to their boyfriends

Kiyoi is a "beautiful he", he is the beautiful man, he is even the most and only beautiful man/person in Hira's eyes

but Kiyoi is not Hira's. Hira wouldn't refer to Kiyoi as "my man" or boyfriend. Not at this period of their life.

Utsukushii kare can be translated to "the beautiful man " or "my beautiful man/boyfriend" and neither translations are wrong. It just feels like there's a sense of ambiguity on whether Hira is willing to call Kiyoi his man/boyfriend or not.

It's sad because Kiyoi already thinks he belongs to Hira

I wasn't trying to say if the powe imbalance is beneficial to anyone. I just think it's very interesting specially for a bl drama.

On one hand we have a clear dynamic between them where one character has the ability to make the other obey them without trying. Kiyoi can tell Hira to literally do anything and Hira will try his hardest to do it. Kiyoi likes Hira paying attention to him but hates it when Hira doesn't see himself or them in a relationship.

On the other hand we know the person who (unknowingly) controls the dynamic and the entire relationship and has all the power is Hira. It's Hira who has the power to keep them together and it's also Hira who is seriously afraid of losing Kiyoi.

They do love each other but sometimes love isn't enough when there is an imbalance and when you are not on the same page.

I really like this drama for how complex the characters and their dynamics are

I mean the first season used to have a rating of 8.3 to 8 until the show was over and then suddenly haters just flooded MDL to give it bad ratings which caused the rating to drop bellow 8

Thank you!

Me in 2021 : defending Kiyoi

Me in 2023 : defending Hira

Let my boys rest lol, they're just insecure OK?

The power dynamic between Hira and Kiyoi is so fascinating. You think that Kiyoi is the one holding all the power but you slowly end up realizing it's actually Hira. Hira is the one who decides how the power dynamic even works lol

I don't think I'll ever be able to find another romance, let alone a bl, with a power dynamic as great and as well written as this one

"he's not obsessive about it, "

He is. He takes it everywhere with him. He loves to see the world through the camera. That's his only thing that he likes to repetitively do since childhood, besides loving Kiyoi.

"if he's meant to be, the writer didn't do a very good job of it."

I'm pretty sure he isn't meant to be because one of the most annoying things about stories is that if you want to represent minorities, you have to explicitly say that they are a minority lol

Hira being autistic is my personal headcanon not the author's intention but I see enough "signs" in Hira to think of him that way

As someone mentioned here, Hira is a tragic character. He loves Kiyoi so much. He fears losing him so much but he fails to love himself and by not loving himself, he might lose Kiyoi and make his fears come true.

It's sad but fascinating to see

On my third rewatch, it's so hard to see how your boyfriend of almost two years doesn't even want to call you his boyfriend when you are alone together.

Well OK first of all, I disagree with the idea of Kiyoi having to baby Hira by asking him how he feels every second. Hira should simply be able to tell Kiyoi if he dislikes something without being asked about it.

Second of all, Kiyoi never "forced" Hira to do anything. Hira enjoys being with Kiyoi which also means that Hira enjoyed shopping with Kiyoi (it was obvious that he liked it) and he liked it when Kiyoi cooked for him eventhough he didn't get to eat it (for his own good lol) Kiyoi did the right thing not allowing Hira to eat that. If my loved ones want to do something harmful I won't allow them just because they like it lol

Because autism or neurodivergence don't exactly always have the same "symptoms". Not every autistic person has trouble with eye contact for example.

I don't think the author wrote Hira with intentions of him coming off as autistic but I do headcanon him as being one. If you disagree you are perfectly fine and allowed to see him the way you want.

Hira's brain in my opinion functions differently. You think Hira is just "weird" but I think not having any interest since childhood is a sign of neurodivergence. I think Hira's repetitive behaviour towards Kiyoi and worshipping him is a sign of neurodivergence. Hira's repetitive behaviour and taking pictures of everything is a sign of neurodivergence. Hira's inability to socialize and find a job could be a sign of neurodivergence. Even Hira's inner thoughts and the way he sees the world around him could be a sign of neurodivergence

I respectfully disagree. Hira doesn't enjoy "objectifying Kiyoi"

Hira enjoys serving Kiyoi and making him happy which does not necessarily involve worship.

I think the reason why he doesn't want to understand Kiyoi is mainly because he is too scared to do so.

As he said in the episode, he thinks Kiyoi is too good for him and if he understands Kiyoi, he makes Kiyoi fall to his level. Hira's world view us different that others. I said it before and I'll say it again,Hira is very likely to have neurodivergence/autism

OK so in my previous comments I said that Kiyoi seems like he is trying to make the relationship work while Hira isn't...

I was kind of wrong. It's not that Hira isn't trying . Hira is trying really hard actually, he just has a very wrong idea on what Kiyoi wants and believes that Kiyoi will leave him one day.

Hira is trying. When Kiyoi told him to become a photographer, he tried his best to do what he said despite his clear social anxiety. He got a job for Kiyoi. He wanted get a driver's license for Kiyoi. He cooks for Kiyoi and tries to do what he tells him to become he genuinely loves Kiyoi. But what Hira is doing is not what the relationship needs and it's not what Kiyoi needs. He should start loving himself more and that's a very hard thing to do.

That scene of Hira riding a bike desperately shouting "eternal" and his clear fear of losing Kiyoi because he couldn't get accepted at the photo competition was heart breaking to see

We call Hira an idiot because we love him so much. He is our idiot <3

I just want to point out that I love Hira so much. He's been bullied to the point that he has too much self worth issues and being in a relationship isn't magically solving it.

OK You are a hater/anti. I don't know anything about k-pop but I read books alot and watch movies so I know when a person refuses to see the story for what it is because they want to hate on it or on certain characters.

I'll answer this one comment for anyone who reads and I think this is my call to leave you to be upset at Kiyoi all by yourself.

1. I wasn't a fan of Yagi Yusei until utsukushii kare. Same with Hagiwara Riku. I like them quite equally as actors right now.

2. I've explained that Hira not introducing Kiyoi to his parents was not the issue at all,but you seem to not be able to understand that. Or you don't want to. Either way, your problem.

3.Kiyoi doesn't want Hira's worship. He wants Hira's love. If you can't tell the difference,Worship dehumanizes Kiyoi and puts him on a pedestal while love is when Hira is able to see Kiyoi for who he is. Kiyoi never wanted to be worshipped. He made it clear several times not only to Hira but to the audience as well. If Hira learns to love himself, he isn't going to stop loving Kiyoi like you claim. He is going to stop worshipping him.

4.The difference between Kiyoi's insecurities and Hira's are that Kiyoi is actually trying while Hira is not. We do acknowledge Kiyoi's faults but Hira doesn't even want to try. He literally said "I don't want to understand Kiyoi"

5. Kiyoi says a lot of things to Hira and the only thing you decided to focus on was exactly one word (gross)which seems like a you problem to me. Didn't you catch when he called Hira handsome? Called his photos pretty? Called him amazing and called his cooking amazing? And yet you claim to watch without bias. Kiyoi says "gross" with a smile on his face and Hira smiles right after him. Hira is gross. His behaviour is sometimes gross. You want Kiyoi to lie? Kiyoi also calls him a stalker(previous season) and he had good reasons for that as well

6. You seem to think it's Kiyoi's responsibility to talk to Hira as if Hira is a child. In an open relationship, two people usually just talk about what's on their mind. Kiyoi is doing a fine job at trying to communicate with all his communication problems. He's tring. It's not his fault that Hira doesn't tell him about stuff like his "interviews". Kiyoi's responsibility is talking about how he feels not forcing Hira to talk to him. Hira should do it by himself.

If you really aren't a hater, then I want to answer you.

First of all, Kiyoi wasn't mad at Hira for not introducing him to anyone. He was fine when Hira told his aunt they were "friends", maybe he was slightly upset but he was fine.

What Kiyoi hated and made him snap was the clear rejection when Hira refused to even acknowledge they are boyfriends when they were alone. Kiyoi has been calling Hira "my man" the entire season only for Hira to not even want to acknowledge friendship, let alone calling them boyfriends.

Second of all, Kiyoi was clearly thinking about having a future with Hira. In episode 1, when they asked Kiyoi about his "friendship" with Hira, Kiyoi didn't agree that they were friends. He seemed uncertain about whether it's OK for him to tell others about their relationship or not but he didn't accept "friendship" and he seemed like he wanted to say more. This is why when Hira says that he'll never relate to his parents, it feels like rejection to Kiyoi not because he necessarily want to meet Hira's parents at that moment but because he thinks Hira doesn't want or even think of a future with him.

Hira's adoration and his lack of self worth are two separate things. He can (and probably should) love himself and Kiyoi at the same time.

Kiyoi has shown multiple times in the series that he cares about Hira and not just Hira's "adoration". He hates being worshipped.

Every time Hira goes in to depressed mode, Kiyoi is quick to try and tell him something to boost his confidence so saying that "Kiyoi doesn't mind it" makes me feel like you haven't even watched the series without your bias

I was going to answer OP but they seem like a Kiyoi hater. There's no way someone can watch this episode and think

"Hira doesn't want Kiyoi to meet his parents" and "Kiyoi thinks everything should be about him"

The only reason Hira doesn't want Kiyoi to meet his parents is because Hira "assumes" that's what Kiyoi wants.

Hira is making it about Kiyoi while Kiyoi is out here trying to make it about "the two of them"

"does he take the time to understand what Hira wants? WHY he thinks like he does?"

The answer to this is an obvious yes. Kiyoi has a much better understanding of Hira than Hira of Kiyoi. Hira might be a deep character but his desires are very simple.

Hira likes Kiyoi. He wants to be with Kiyoi, cherish him and take his picture. Kiyoi obviously knows that.

This is why when Kiyoi heard about Hira's desire to find a job and his fear of interviews due to his stuttering problems, he got upset. He doesn't like Hira keeping things from him. Kiyoi is trying his best. It's not exactly his fault that Hira doesn't talk about everything with him.

Hira on the other hand is the one who isn't even trying to understand Kiyoi. He literally said it in this episode, he doesn't understand Kiyoi which is heart breaking. Kiyoi has told him how he feels multiple times at this point but Hira somehow doesn't "want" the communication.

I usually don't like blaming characters and take sides in complicated relationships like this one but if you want to blame someone for their lack of understanding , then you should blame Hira. Not Kiyoi.

Hira never said he doesn't want to be a photographer. He wants it. To be more specific he wants a job. Him never seeing photographs as a job doesn't mean that he doesn't want it

Also, am I the only one who was laughing my ass off when Kiyoi called Hira gross in his sleep lol