Kate

The black hole of brain cells the Alphas had - the true entertainment.

Where to even start? The manipulations, red flags, black flags, assaults, temporary and plot convenient “face blindness”, amazing brainpower versus negative brainpower - the mix of everything one can imagine. And my brain struggles with comprehending all of that. But maybe that was the point?

The best and the worst aspect for me? Shen Wen Lang. I loved him and I hated him so much. How can one character be this dumb? It’s magical. And so entertaining. Frustrating too, but in an entertaining manner. I think the key to enjoying the show is to… not feel bad for any character and keep reminding yourself it’s just a makjang werewolf coded Omegaverse trash tv. It’s a bit like a horror movie - you are not supposed to feel bad for the victims… That’s sounds bad, but it is what it is ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

So first we have the biggest victim - Sheng Shao You. That’s your smart-dumb male lead who knows enough to be impressive to others, but also lacks any street smarts and insight to see through Hua Yong’s schemes. To be manipulated this bad for this long is a skill itself. Still, one thing I did appreciate a lot was how his pairing with Hua Yong went against typical conventions. The “top” was the scheming feminine force, and the bottom was the manly man. It was surprisingly well written and delivered.

Then we have the blackest of black flags - Hua Yong. What a casting to be honest. Huang Xing was able to deliver the feminine vulnerability and the badass bitch energy seemingly without any problems and both cases were perfectly believable and made sense for the character he was playing. The fake smiles, smirks delivery when no one was watching fake tears, anger issues, complete obsession and devotion. All so wrong, all so entertaining.

Gao Tu was the most heartbreaking character of them all. Of his own making, that’s also true, but no matter how you look at it he was a victim of his social and economical situation. Truth to be told, his character was the only one that made me feel uncomfortable while watching There was one scene, a close up moment to his face that lasted maybe 3 seconds, but it was so raw and felt so wrong, even thought I was laughing like a maniac few seconds earlier because of the ridiculous plot, this one moment slapped me in the face with how wrong what I was watching actually was. And dear lord, that was such a bad choice from the production team. The way to enjoy these shows is to NEVER make them hyperrealistic, they are not supposed to be taken seriously.

As for the plot itself - what a mess. The only well written and delivered things were Hua Yong’s schemes. All the rest? Oh so bad. Starting from anything related to business - why? 80% of business related scenes were useless and had no impact on the overall story.

Then we have a joke that Gao Tu and Wen Lang story was . I do not care that they had even less presence and development in the novel. The good adaptation knows how to fix the shortcomings of the source material - you either remove bits you know you cannot elaborate more on, or you expand on the bits that were underdeveloped to create a more cohesive story with a strong and fitting conclusion. Here we have just wasted potential that their dynamic was. And I don’t even want to talk about the clownery the conclusion they received - I cried, screamed and laughed, because I could not believe that was it.

Acting was hit and miss. Huang Xing and Li Pei En easily delivered a solid and convincing performance. Qiu Ding Jie was a hit or miss depending on the scene - overall passable. Jiang Heng gave me nothing. That’s the “I got dragged here by a friend and got involved, but I don’t really know what I am doing here” vibe. Kind of hope acting is not his dream job (oops).

The production… Where to start? I did like how they managed to film and deliver the intimate scenes. There are obviously limits to how much they can show since it’s a Chinese BL, but without showing much, they were still able to deliver the sensual and at times a bit spicy image. Maybe I’m just tired of the soft porn we are getting from Thailand? Anyway, this was a pleasant surprise. They did go a bit too artsy with some filters, but since they used them to "censor" certain things. I will give them a pass. They clearly tried to do their best with the limits they had.

But then there are the ridiculous issues with editing - especially sound design and dubbing. There was one scene that lasted a good 10+ seconds where the characters were obviously talking, but there was no dialogue sound, just the background music. Stuff like that, things related to post production and smart planning more than the budget are hard to excuse.

Overall, what a bullshit drama it was, but how entertained they made it amazes me. There were a lot of things that should have been fixed, but I’d be lying if I said I did not have fun watching. But it’s for sure not the “it’s so good I love it”, but rather “it’s so bad, I love it” type of a deal. I ranted after every episode, my blood kept boiling, but I could not drop it, and I watched all episodes as soon as they dropped.

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I am not going to lie, I felt extremely frustrated while watching this drama. It had amazing potential, but close to nothing worked out. The beauty - amazing cinematography and styling of our main character, and the beast - the writing.

There honestly is not much to say about the characters, since the only one that had true depth was Man Wol. She was the centre of the drama and IU did an amazing job representing her development and gradual change. Chang Sung could have worked way better if it wasn't for Chung Myung. All the rest of the characters we simply did not spend enough time with, to truly care about. I must say, Sanchez was my favorite and he was the breath of fresh air.

Kim Seon Bi/Choi Seo Hee/Ji Hyun Joong aka when writers do not care.
Out of all their stories, only Seo Hee's had some depth to it. Kim Seon Bin's story was extremely random, there were close to no hints about his previous life so I did not even care to speculate what happened to him. Hyun Joong's past life story had the least sense. How did his sister not recognize that the guy taking care of her was not her brother. How did his family not ask any questions, why did they recognize her and not him? You could say it was a war so they did not see him for a long time, but the same would apply to the sister. Hong sisters did not care enough about those characters to spend time to truly explain and develop their stories. They had the material for a good 8 episodes of Man Wol's side and had to fill the rest with random storylines. I could not feel emotional about them all leaving at the end, because all I could think about was: None of it makes any sense.

I also believe it would be better to start sending away the characters around episode 10-12, and not just have them all gone in the last 2 episodes. We could slowly see how Man Wol is realizing all the people she loves and cares about are gone and moving on to the afterlife. How the ones that stay behind struggle with the loss. We would see her being more concerned about how will Chan Sung deal in the future when she is gone. Them gradually leaving would have more impact on both the characters and the storyline.

Chan Sung/Chung Myung aka the failed romance
While I enjoyed Chan Sung at the beginning, the moment we got more scenes with Chung Myung and the past story developed into something interesting, I could not focus on the present. Chan Sung was simply a boring character that was there only for Man Wol's story to develop and he had nothing going on for himself. When we met another male character that had a past romantic relationship with Man Wol, but also was its own character, it was easy to forget our male lead. At the end of the day I wished for more flashbacks and less present plot. And I would rather have them as friends than as romantic partners.

Kim Yoo Na aka no one truly cares about anything
While I enjoyed Yoo Na, I do believe they should have made her a more tragic character. Yet again, there was no depth to the story. Show me how much she struggles to fit in that new house, how she misses her old friends and family and how she is tired of pretending to be someone else.

All the hotel cases aka when you try too hard to please the viewers
I did not truly like any of the random hotel cases, but I hated some more than others. The most random one with the humans having sex in the hotel room to have some superior child in the future. I was truly confused why this plotline was in the drama.
There were too many cases, so at the end, none of them was developed or complex. They tried to fit any genre (horror, crime, romance, melo, etc.) into the drama, just to make sure all viewers can find something they may like.

Disney ending aka when you are afraid to commit to the tragedy
None of the characters involved in the drama had a truly tragic ending. Which was extremely unrealistic. It could be easily fixed. Make Yoona too late to say goodbye to Hyun Joong. After Seo Hee goes to the bridge, cut to the mother registering the baby with the father's surname because of the grandparents. Make the book about Seon Bi flop. I would even like for Chung Myung to vanish because he used all his energy looking after Man Wol. The Song sisters wanted to show us how sad, tragic, and emotional the feeling of loss is, but they did not want to show the truly ugly side of it. Because of that, the ending felt bland.

Overall, during the whole watch, there was literally (and I truly mean it) only one time when I thought "wow, this is a good writing, I finally feel the playoff" and it was with how they used the Coffee Writer Dude. They spent just enough time for us to be curious about him and wonder what will happen to him, when he will go to the afterlife.

At the end, Hong Sisters had an amazing idea, about an amazing character, and no idea what to do with the rest. Trying to fit too many stories of too many characters made this drama a... mess.

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I love Sang Ha, I do, but this was painfully mediocre.

My biggest problem was how Sang Ha's story and the romance were disconnected. They felt like two different shows. We had fun comedy and fluff between main leads, and punches and threats with debt collectors. Both put next to each other just didn't click well, since they almost always were presented separately.

The characters were also quite a mess. Sang Ha and Jin Woo had both half a brain cell that they must have shared. The bad guys told you they will ruin Jin Won's chance to win by throwing water at him? You tell Jin Won about it. It's that simple. It's not like his debt was a secret. They could have easily prevented it from happening, without Sang Ha going after first place (good for him tho). Why did he even cut contact with Jin Won after the marathon? His whole logic for winning and paying the debt was to protect Jin Won and be able to keep running with him (as he "passionately" screamed at his face in the last episode)... but then he just left? LoGiC.

Jin Won with the whole "go buy yourself proper new running shoes" when Sang Ha already told him he is running early mornings to deliver milk, because he ain't got money, but he needs to pay the debt. Something didn't click right in Jin Won's brain I guess. Not to mention that punch in the last episode. WHERE THE HECK IT CAME FROM? Not once they hinted that Jin Won might be a one to react aggressively with physical force. And here he is punching a kid in the face. This is called bad writing, ladies and gentlemen.

The debt storyline was truly the worst part that ruined the whole show for me. Why they couldn't keep it simple with a sweet romance is beyond me. The debt collectors went from punching the kid in the face, to crying when he finally paid it off, giving some bullshit, out of place, emotional reaction. Not to mention, apparently in Korea, when your parents die when you are in middle school, you don't go to an orphanage or foster family. You are left alone to deal with it... Go figure

It had some cute moments, I'm not gonna lie, but instead of watching the whole show, you could watch the highlights on youtube. Even the last scene had to be ruined by making them run in semi formal clothes ON A DATE. We get it, they are runners. Damn the writers... Why?

Get rid of the debt angst story, use the few minutes you gained to develop the relationship a bit more, and it would be easily 9/10 for me.

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Top level of entertainment. Can’t say the same about the quality of writing.

I want to start by saying - I did enjoy the show a lot, almost till the end. I watched the episodes as soon as they dropped. That said, I’m not gonna pretend like it’s some writing masterpiece - it’s not. It often hits the “teen’s first fanfic” level. Did I mind? Not really. I went into it for the Dear Daddy Devil and Bai Lu’s acting, and these two aspects were easily 10/10.

What did the drama do great? Tantai Jin’s arc. The questions of predestined path, freedom and choice, the importance of having the supportive community and people that trust and love. How much of where we end is on us, and how much can be explained by how others treat us? At which point we should take responsibility? Is revenge and justice the same? What’s more important - trust or perceived truth? Surprisingly a lot of depth in his story. Sadly, the writers had some issues with keeping Tantai Jin's wits and cunning nature and also progressing the plot - which led to quite a few moments when his brain must have been turned off to make such dumb choices.

Luo Yun Xi in the role? Pure perfection. The emo angst fits him so well, I was in awe. Whatever you ask from him - he will deliver it and more, in the most beautiful and heartbreaking way. I never knew an actor who presents suffering in such a stunning way.

Then we have Li Su Su played by Bai Lu. What a performance. She did great as a more idealistic and naive Su Su, desperate and driven Xi Wu, and the duality of Sang Jiu. Each character/persona was easily distinguishable with the portrayal. The angst and pain Bai Lu can deliver - be it extreme or subtle - was just phenomenal and truly breaking one’s heart. I don’t think the character herself has much to offer though. Any weaker performance than the perfection Bai Lu presented, would make Li Su Su either boring or insufferable. I just feel bad for the girl, because the writers obviously did not give a fuck about this character… She was this great thanks to the actress and the chemistry she had with Luo Yun Xi.

And that chemistry should be illegal. How can such a questionable and build on a toxic fundamentals relationship still seem so amazing, beautiful and perfect? Love, hate, hope, trust, doubt, protection, resentment, fear - what a mix of conflicting emotions and motivations. And that complexity was what made this duo so entertaining and such a blast to watch.

Beside the main characters, I want to give big props to Chen Du Ling who played Ye Bing Chang. How much I hated this character, how much I loved the performance. It’s also impossible not to appreciate Pian Ran - stunning arc as a side plot, amazing conclusion fitting the plot, great performance by Sun Zhen Ni.

Talking about the characters, it’s time to talk about the biggest sin this show and the writer committed - they made everyone so dumb, I did not even care who will win and who will lose, because I did not see a bright future no matter which side gets the victory.

So many things did not make any sense, but you cannot really call them plot holes, because they kind of had an explanation - lack of working brain cells. At first I found it amusing, but at some point it just frustrated me on a whole new level. You don’t know how to write a proper conflict and the origin of it, so you just make your character dumb for a few scenes to set it up.

That also led to repetitive scenes and arcs - just rewriting the same moments we have seen a few episodes ago, with small changes here and there. Refusing to give your characters’ proper character development can only lead to them making the same mistakes over and over and over again. This is one man show, and all the other characters are just a background for his story.

I have to say though, I’m quite impressed with the directing and editing taking into consideration how much of the plot and scenes had to be cut down to fit the 40 episodes format. Yes, there were many moments that the pacing seemed like a car chase, but the overall story was still relatively easy to follow and understand. On the other hand, the make-up artists need to change their careers, because the thing these actors had on their faces should be illegal to present to the public. Loved the costumes, liked the set and magical objects designs. Loved how they Sailor Moon changed their clothes when they reached new powers.

The soundtrack had some good moments, but there were also “oops” bits like them playing a pop royalty free facebook ads like music in the background in the last episode.

Overall, I had a lot of fun, later I had less fun, by the end I had a lot of fun ranting. One could say it’s a full on personal journey I had with this drama, and they would not be wrong.

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No logic, no cohesiveness, no brain… and I have no self respect for watching this.

When watching this movie, every new revelation made me ask one simple question “why?” - everything about the characters, their relationship and plot progression was so unnatural all I could do was laugh about the piling up cliches.

Alpha male with a soft heart and an innocent kid with a warm nature will give you a second hand embarrassment with every little ridiculous interaction and painful dialogues. Who needs decent writing when you can just throw poorly executed cliches at your audience?

And the ending? I don’t think I would manage to write something similar even on crack. What happened? How high were the characters? How high was the writer? It took me 30 minutes to finish the last 10 minutes. I kept pausing because my brain could not take this level of prolonged idiocy.

Acting wise… I think it’s time for me to leave the delulu land and admit Zee is not really a good actor, he is just good at delivering heart eyes. It truly pains me to say, since I basically wrote an essay about how amazing of an actor with great potential he has 4 years ago. On the other hand NuNew did quite well trying to deliver good performance even though the script made it an impossible task.

Overall, I regret watching it alone. I think this is a perfect title to group watch and joke about all the stuff that makes no sense. The movie truly invites you to rant your heart out.

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Suspension of disbelief needed, and not because of the fantasy elements.

I’m usually one to say that we cannot excuse lackluster execution simply based on the short length of a show. Here though, I feel like that was truly the biggest issue, and no matter how they would try to approach the story, it would not improve much without additional minutes of runtime.

The story itself, the premise and idea behind it - great. It was truly a refreshing concept for a BL. Dealing with past trauma was the major theme in the show, but I feel like we get to that idea only by the end of the show. That’s when it hit me and the ending made a perfect scene in the context of the whole drama.

How about romance? It was decent. Lee Hyun Jun and Moon Ji Yong had a rather good and natural chemistry, but the way Shin Jae Woo was written made it hard for me to truly appreciate their scenes together. His antics and rather child-like demeanor makes more sense by the end of the show, but it still makes it hard for me to see them as more than just friends.

The thing about Shin Jae Woo’s character - he acted like his younger self. At times, I felt like his behavior as a child in the past, and now the grown up did not differ that much. Did it make his interaction with Ji Hoon cute and entertaining? Yes. Did it interfere with the romance for me? Also yes.

Then there was also the problem of realistic progression of the feelings. I kept asking myself “when, why and how did Ji Hoon fall for Jae Woo?”. They barely meet, Jae Woo was acting borderline creepy and weird around Ji Hoon. Does the guy just have a peculiar taste in men? Not to mention the strength of the feelings. My man, you barely met this guy. This is not a Shakespearean story to have people deeply in love on the first meeting.

That was one of the issues we usually have to deal with when watching short BLs. I kind of started to accept that, but it’s still worth pointing out with hopes of improvements in the future.

I have some thoughts about the ending, you can find them in a comment under spoiler below. Overall… I’m just not completely sure I understand the mechanics of it… It was also the part that made me question how far I am supposed to ignore logic and reality.

Acting wise, better than many K-BLs. Were these groundbreaking performances? No. They were believable though, and that’s all I need. Moon Ji Yong for sure did the best, especially in the last episode - one scene truly impressed me.

The OST - perfection. All songs worthy of being added to a playlist to listen outside of the show. “Time” was my favorite. The melody and the vocals were just amazing.

Overall, it was fun. I liked the characters and their interactions. I wish the show was longer so the pacing would feel more natural, and the relationship progression would not feel so abrupt.

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This show is the wake up call that begs us to be more skeptical.

This whole documentary just made me angry. The idea that some people can get so easily manipulated simply by the virtue of a person claiming they have holy guidance makes my blood boil. Rape, torture, murder, abuse, suicide - all because some random person claimed they are Jesus reincarnated. At the same time, it shows how clever these cult leaders were, how well planned their schemes were and how they selected the victims - they did not target everyone. That's why it's so important for us ask questions and rely on more than trust and belief.

I’m not going to lie, the level of religious freedom in Korea was always fascinating for me. On the first glance the idea of all the religions being able to rather peacefully coexist in one country, where no one is truly judged by their religious beliefs sounds like a utopia. With this level of acceptance and “no questions asked” comes a big danger though: the country becomes a breeding ground for cults. How many reincarnated Jesuses can there be in the small country of South Korea at the same time?

The documentary presents a rather uncomfortable question: what to do with victims who become perpetrators? How much can be forgiven based on the brainwashing they went through, and how much responsibility should they take for their actions? The leaders were evil, we can all agree. We wanted them to be punished and suffer as much as their victims did. What with the members? Logically speaking you know they are the victims, but it’s impossible not to feel any resentment towards them.

Some people may say it was unnecessarily detailed, unnecessarily graphic, unnecessarily descriptive, but I strongly disagree. Did this documentary make you feel uncomfortable? Angry? Sad? Scared? Good, then it did its job to present the reality of the victims. Saying it was unnecessarily detailed is like saying it was unnecessary realistic - they used real footage of the events, they used real photos, videos and recordings, they used real testimonies - it was not shown for a shock value, it was shown because it was the reality of what happened. The reality was just that shocking, awful and evil.

If I were to complain about one thing production wise - some footages were shown a few too many times, especially of JMS in the first 3 episodes. They kept showing the same videos of him preaching, and that I felt was a bit too much and truly unnecessary. Showing it once would be enough.

TW: I don’t know… feels like anything you can think of: rape, dead bodies, suicide, self harm, abuse, child neglect, child abuse… They show real photos and videos from crime scenes and recordings from victims, even the reenacted interviews are detailed and based on the real statements from real victims. It’s a lot.

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Morality and legality do not always go hand in hand.

Surprisingly coherent storytelling that does not go into preachy territories - truly presenting different perspectives on a complex subject of euthanasia. What's even more amazing is the satisfying ending that makes perfect sense. No, it's not a sarcasm. Ending that I find to be the perfect for both the characters themselves and the themes the show presents. Euthanasia is not a simple topic to discuss since it involves so many conflicting moral and legal aspects.

Is euthanasia the same as murder? If not, what makes it different? When it's a valid option, and can it even be a valid option for any patient? Should politicians have the right to decide when and how we die? Whose suffering should take priority - patients' or their families? If the family is not ready to part with their loved one, should they have any say in deciding if euthanasia should be performed? How to determine if the patient is capable to make that decision themselves? So many questions, no concrete answers. And that's the beauty of this drama.

While the dialogue heavy moments shined the most, the crime aspect could have been improved. Did it bother me how bad the investigation was? At times, yes. But at the end of the day, it was not a crime detective drama, it was a psychological thriller heavy on drama. Realistically speaking, many things did not make sense, but also realistically speaking, I did not care.

Similarly, the romance came out of nowhere and many times I laughed about the validity of leads feelings. And yet, it still hits hard when it needs to. Maybe if the drama was longer, so they had more time to present the relationship in a more evenly paced way... I guess they did what they could with the time they had.

For the performance, Tor in the last episode? On fire with his acting skills. I had to rewatch a certain scene 3 times because I loved his delivery so much. I do not think there was a weak link in the cast - everyone executed their characters in a perfect manner. Yes, I talk to JJ through screen a few times to "put his eyebrow down", but at some point I just started to see it as his charming point. Maybe I was brainwashed? Still, a heavy subject like euthanasia requires skills to present it in a respectful way, and I do think Spare Me Your Mercy achieved just that.

Overall, a great watch. Both entertaining and inviting some reflection to form our own stance on the subject. It knew when to bring back lighter tone and some cute romance, and when to get serious when the scenes needed.

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Loved the individuals, did not like the couples.

Am I the only one who was far more happy and entertained when I was watching the group moments and interaction between participants that were completely not romantically involved? Too many times I wanted to skip the dates and just watch them hang out in the house. I like them all as individuals, I like them all in the group setting, but I could not vibe with any of the couples at the end.

And I feel like this is why the show failed me - I had no pair to truly root for. I felt like none of the exes would work out, since they just danced around each other, but never truly try to solved their previous issues. The new couples were easily shaken by the past relationships, which made me think they would not last anyway, so what's the point?

I actually loved first few episodes, but the more romantically involved everyone became, the less I cared. That said, I still like the whole cast a lot, especially the best girl Da Hye. Wish her all the healing and happiness she needs.

Overall, I have barely any thoughts. I think I just truly don't care.

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"I will go outside to see the world. I will fail and I will suffer!...

...I want to see what I can achieve in the end!"

There is so much to love about this drama. There is also surprisingly a lot I did not, and it only hit me when I got closer to the end.

It’s safe to say this is a perfect drama for all found family trope fans. Watching Li Jian Jian, Ling Xiao and He Zi Qiu support each other under the caring watch of Li Hai Chao was beautifully heartwarming. What amazed me the most was the fact these relationships were not idealized. All characters struggled with many internal and external issues that were well developed and presented. Themes like being scared of being abandoned, or being forced to abandon people you love. The constant feeling you need to act perfect, be perfect, never complain to be worth the support you are getting. That uncomfortable feeling when people who were close to you in the past feel distant in the present. All of these affected their interactions with each other and made the bond that much more meaningful and strong.

Li Jian Jian was such a force of positivity. I know some people disliked her as a teenager, but personally I loved her in all 3 stages of her life. She was adorable as a kid, fun and expressive as a teenager and mature, but still exciting to watch as an adult. She was the person that could be called “home” by many characters and the bond that kept them together.

Ling Xiao was the one who kept his scars hidden the most and it was painful to watch. At times it truly felt as if he gave up on himself - whatever happens, as long as people he cares about are safe. The most passive in response to trauma, the one that kept it all inside. Finding his salvation in Li Jian Jian.

He Zi Qiu who smiled, even if he was crying inside. Fighting his battles alone, not wanting anyone to help, not wanting anyone to pity him. Trying his best not to be a burden, wanting to protect people around him. So caring, so good, so well-natured with such a bright and radiant personality. He became an older brother to all the characters.

And you know what’s the best? The main characters were not the only ones with depth. All the supporting characters had well-defined personalities and individual struggles that were separate from their connections to the main cast. Ming Yue who was limited by her low self-esteem and overbearing mother, Tang Can who felt like she was stuck in place when everyone around her lived their best and successful lives. I loved how Zhuang Bei did not disappear after the high school timeline, how he truly became part of the friend group. Or how Qin Mei Ying was not just a plot device and accessory to Chen Ting.

And then we have the best father in all drama history: Li Hai Chao. He could be used as a gold standard on how to well-integrate adopted children into an already existing family. He made sure everyone felt welcomed without neglecting his own daughter. Being patient was his biggest strength that made all the kids trust him. Putting happiness and well-being over, often meaningless achievements. Purest form of support we all dream about.

Sadly, that’s the end of the short list of the good parents this drama presented, and one of the main issues I had with the show.

Yes, I did like Ling He Ping, but it’s also true that he was a rather neglectful father. Working a lot, not being at home knowing how bad the situation is. Later putting his son in the care of a neighbor.

Not going into details, at some point I found the level and the number of dysfunctional families in this show exhausting and unrealistic. All families have their problems, that’s true. The thing is, Go Ahead does not present your typical issues, it’s all on the level of: you need therapy, these are not disagreement, this is an abuse.

Then we have the issue of vilification of mothers. This one abandoned her child, another did the same. This one is overcontrolling to the point of abuse, this one uses her child to get money. There was literally only one mother without any major issues, who did not mentally torture her child, and she was a mom of the side character. It’s not like the dads were perfect, but their faults were never highlighted as much.

At the same time, the drama gives a rather painful and unhealthy message - no matter what, you cannot give up on your mother, you have to try and make the relationship work, no matter the abuse and how much you are suffering, because it is your mother. Abandoning your child is “a mistake”, but not helping your mother when she struggles is the biggest sin one can commit. Some scenes just made me feel uncomfortable. I know there are some cultural differences and China puts a lot of importance on family bonds and family relations, but there is a big difference between doing your best to fix a relationship with your parents and just accepting abuse for years.

I also feel like the drama unintentionally stigmatizes mental health issues. In some aspects they did a good job, showing how serious are the consequences of emotional abuse, trauma, neglect, stress, pressure etc. The fact it’s not just - I feel sad. How it can affect your daily life, how it will only get worse if you won’t seek help and try to change the situation you are in. On the other hand though, they did blame a lot of toxic and awful behavior on psychological issues. The sad truth is - some people are simply dicks, and they will act like one whenever they struggle with something or not. Some people are just egocentric and selfish and them getting help won’t change that.

My “favorite” part about mental health presentation? Two characters talking about how you cannot get better in just a few months when you struggle with serious psychological issues, while also showing how serious issues were solved in a short period of time without getting into any details on how. All I could do was laugh.

Going back to the good - PERFORMANCES! Personally I believe Zhang Xin Chen and Tu Song Yan stole the show. The strong and beautiful father-son bond these two were able to present was one of the best aspects of the drama. They also had the best overall chemistry with all their co-stars. Whatever these two characters were going through always hit harder and made me feel more compared to when I watched the other characters.

While I enjoyed Tan Song Yun and Song Wei Long for their individual roles, somehow I did not click with their scenes together as their characters became adults. I feel like they had more chemistry playing teenagers. When the three siblings were together, when they had their separate scenes with Zhang Xin Chen, the on-screen chemistry was great, but when it was just the two of them… something was missing.

I don’t really have that much to say about the production value. It was great, but great is kind of a standard now in the industry.

On the other hand, there is a lot to compliment about the soundtrack! There is not one bad song, not one mismatched track - every tune is in perfect harmony with their corresponding scenes. Every song enhances the moments I witnessed, amplifying the emotions.

Overall, I binge watched the whole drama in 6 days, I think that is a greatest proof Go Ahead is an amazing show. It makes you like and care for the characters from episode one, and with each minute you get more and more attached to them and their journey.

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Non linear storytelling at its best (with few "flops").

Undoubtedly thrilling and unique story that does not give you a minute of a break - fast paced, well packed with both the plot and the action. Cleverly showing you just bits and pieces of a larger context, uncovering the whole story with each and every episode. While A Shop for Killers had a few issues, it’s still a title worth checking out - perfect for weekend binge watch.

One could say it opens like a fish out of the water type of scenario. Not quite. From the start we can see that Jung Ji Ahn is far from being a defenseless young woman, even if she herself is not quite aware of it. Personally, I found the story of her growing up under the careful watch of Jeong Jin Man the best out of the whole show. The bizarre, but obviously strong bond they had, the silent understanding. It was amazing to watch her connect the weird training from the past with her current situation, and use said lessons to survive.

At the same time, Jeong Jin Man’s past seemed a bit messy and did not get the conclusion that fitted the initial tense atmosphere surrounding it. By the end of episode 8, I had to rewatch certain scenes just to make sure I did not miss anything. Where are the answers? Nowhere, just more piling up questions.

Another aspect that was a bit frustrating was how they at times utilized the non linear storytelling by repetitive usage of scenes. The show was short. There were some scenes that truly expanded on what was previously shown - giving us the whole context and full story. At the same time, there were some moments where the “already shown” part was simply too long. I’ve already watched these scenes one episode ago, you do not need to show it to me from start again. I could not stop myself from skipping minutes of the drama, just to get to the point where the story moves forward.

Performance wise? Amazing. Some actors were a bit typecast, which made it easier to guess the their intentions and possible actions, nonetheless - everyone delivered. Personally, I am a fan of Lee Dong Wook in dark roles, so this one hits the spot perfectly. Jung Jin Man is obviously not a good person, not a good character, but there is good in him and that’s what differentiates him from some of his, let’s say “co-workers”. Seeing these detailed differences was an interesting experience. They are both bad, but are they equally bad? How much of someone's actions is understandable, can be explained and excused, where is the line that should not be crossed?

Kim Hye Joon was amazing as Ji Ahn. Well executed character development. Loved the strong and raw emotions she was able to present when Ji Ahn was cornered and truly exhausted with the dangerous situation she got dragged into. Loved the more soft scenes of her as a carefree child and teenager. Loved how Kim Hye Joon was able to present the duality of the character in such a great manner.

Shout-out to the cute guy who helped Ji Ahn when she was a child, if you watched, you know.

Production was great - the soundtrack was full of bops, the fighting scenes had amazing choreographies, the practical effects of blood and other painful “things” were on point.

Overall, left a lot to explore, by the end felt like a borderline bait for possible second season with quite a few aspects not being fully explored. And yet, I’m not mad. It was highly entertaining, had many interesting characters on both the good and the bad side (and let me tell you, the bad side is BAD). Keeps you interested and engaged from episode one till the last scene of episode eight.

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Chemistry that truly carries the whole show.

Honestly speaking, this is not a special drama in terms of the plot - the light enemies to frenemies to friends to lovers has been done many times, but it’s undeniable the execution here was amazing. Gemini and Fourth are truly the best new BL actors out there.

I have to say, both Tinn and Gun are perfectly written. Tinn has this amazingly goofy side of him that you cannot ignore, you just adore it. Gun is just a walking charm. It’s not all sweet though, and both the characters struggle with some internal issues, but are able to support each other in the best ways possible.

The relationship is simply wholesome. I loved how Tinn was focusing on Gun’s happiness and not just about his goal of dating him. I loved that they actually had a lot of nice conversations and tried to understand each other. I loved the mutual support. With the oversaturation in the BL industry with questionable and toxic stories, this level of understanding and mutual respect was simply refreshing to watch.

That’s for the main couple, what about the side ones? Sadly a bit of a failure. Either the chemistry was just not quite there, or the setup and progression was barely existing. Did I care about any of the side characters? Honestly - no.

Can we also just shortly talk about the mothers in this show? I could not be more happy with what we’ve got. Both Tinn’s and Gun’s mom are amazing in their own way. The drama perfectly showcases how good communication with your child is what builds trust and makes them want to confide in you for support, share their happiness and be honest about their struggles. Sometimes it’s important to take the initiative, but sometimes you have to give your child space and time and let them speak when they are ready, and not when you want to hear the answers.

Tinn's dad too, great person, I wish we got to see more of him.

The plot was great, but I also got a bit bored at some point. I still enjoyed all the adorable moments as I was watching, but I also had to motivate myself to start the episodes in the first place. This show was 90% fluff and 10% content (yes, this is an exaggeration, don’t sue me for it). And with that ratio it should be maybe 8 and not 12 episodes.

That said, there was one thing I will never complain about, no matter how many times it will happen even just as a filler fluff - good hugs. Hugs are underappreciated. Hugs are amazing. Proper hug on screen is at times better than kissing scenes. Melt into these arms and give us all butterflies! My School President definitely delivered in that area.

Fourth’s acting, his cheeky smile and warm gaze… Can we even ask for more? Yes we can, and we got it all - from the light and funny scenes, to more emotional and raw expressions, this boy delivered it all. Gemini also does great with acting. Surprised how well he does subtle comedy. For the rest of the cast - some did better, some did worse. We got the glorious “no tears just squeezing eyes hard” scene.

Production side of it was great. I am so happy to see the improvement in that aspect in the BL industry and the effort in making the show deliver a good storytelling both in writing and in the visual aspects.

Overall, the purest of the fluff. On screen chemistry that will make you jealous of not experiencing it yourself. Great main characters with fun personalities and relatable stories. But sadly also forgettable side characters and subplots there just to feel the screen time and overall repetitiveness of the story.

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“The crime would not have occurred if there was no demand for it.”

It’s not an easy watch. Even the reenactment of how the perpetrators usually trap their victims that was shown as the opening sequence just sets you on an anger trip. It’s impossible not the feel both the pain, frustration, fear and anger of these young girls who ended up in these situations.

Honestly speaking, I wanted to cry even before the intro with credits started. One of the most terrifying things about it was the number of perpetrators involved in it. We all know bad people exist, but we rarely truly understand how prevalent some actions are in society.

It also had a glimpse of hope? It was good to know there were people, even just university students, who risked a lot to expose and investigate these issues - otherwise it would be still buried and no one would know. It is reassuring to know that where there are bad people, there are also good ones. It was a rather detailed narration about the investigation process done by both the police and the journalists. The biggest heroes of the stories were the victims who stepped forward and helped the investigation to happen in the first place.

The commentary done while the credit rolled at the end was a perfect conclusion to the documentary. It’s not the victims’ fault. Anyone can become a victim. The way the society judges and blamed the victims makes it more probable for them to then do what perpetrators tell them to do, as they don’t feel like society will support them if they come forward and report the crime.

That said, one thing that bothered me was how they tried really hard to make it movie-like visually pleasing. At times it did not feel like I’m watching a documentary, but a drama. Just the style of filming the reenactment did not sit right with me. It was beautiful, but I honestly don’t think I should be getting distracted by the visual storytelling and pretty frames in a documentary about topics like that.

Another thing is the fact the documentary switches its focus from victims to the investigation process. I wish we got to see a bit more about the effects this horror hard on people involved and how strong and brave were the people who got through it and helped with the investigation.

On a personal note, exposing myself right now, but the topic is serious enough I think it’s worth it.

How big of a problem sexual exploitation and scams are in Korea? Me being a polish girl, got an email in Korean stating they have a video of me masturbating and if I won’t pay them, they will distribute it on the internet. Luckily, I knew a video like that cannot exist so I just ignored the email, but I know there would be many people who would fall for that scam.

Another personal story: one day before I started high school I was also threatened on the phone by a group of guys that they know where I live and they will have fun with me - it’s easy to understand what they meant. They told me which school I will start the next day. I assumed they were somehow related to a group of students that bullied me in middle school, but getting that phone call almost 2 years after the bullying happened was truly a terrifying experience. It ended on that one phone call and nothing happened - I was lucky. But being a victim of an incident like that myself, even though it was far less severe than anything described in the documentary, made it that much harder to watch it.

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Disclaimer: I did not like this drama. It will be a harsh rant review so if you don't think you can handle it, don't read it. If you do read it, don't write to me that I'm hurting people's feelings with it.
What’s more: I do NOT care about the novel. I do not care how well everything was explained and shown in the novel. I’m reviewing the drama. If the show cannot be consumed without my prior knowledge about the plot of the novel, it speaks volumes about the quality of the drama itself.

At first I refused to rate this drama. I had truly no idea what rating would do it justice. For how they handled certain topics it should get -100, but the acting was decent, at times even good, the set design, audio editing, lighting and other technical aspects were good too, and these definitely do not deserve such a low rating. That said, since MDL forces me to state my stars, I will go with my feelings, be as subjective as possible and give it “well deserved” 2.5 stars.

DIRECTING/WRITING
Sadly, the lack of experience in directing is quite obvious. While there was a lot of thought put into „steamy” scenes and how to show them in the most attractive, sensual way, not the same amount of work had been put into directing and showing the overall plot. The biggest problem I had was the confusing time progression and weird time jumps without proper explanation.

Another aspect of directing that caught me off guard was a random and rushed beginning. Why we did not see how the friendship of Type and Tharn was established? All we've got was one line of Type saying Tharn is good looking, nice and most likely will help him get a girl and exactly 1 minute and 17 seconds of them meeting for the first time three weeks ago.

The fact we did not see these two establishing the relationship and spending time together as friends was one of the reasons Tharn's big love seemed so out of place. After seeing the whole drama, it's safe to assume he fell for Type before Type found out he is gay. But we did not see that, so with how badly Type was treating him, it was given I would question Tharn's sanity and reasons behind his feelings. When did he fall for Type? That's the question the drama does not really answer.

Unanswered questions, scenes that seem to have no reason for existing, loose ends - all of them happened at some point. I kept seeing people asking questions about certain plot points and plotlines and the only way to understand the reasoning behind them was to hear from someone who read the novel which was usually followed by continuous excuses of time restriction.

If you know you cannot possibly fit all the plotlines in the time framework set for your drama, you should rewrite it. As much as I liked the “Korean” guy and his roommate, they should not be part of the plot. Not only were their characters not developed, they brought close to nothing to the show, but instead have taken away the precious time that could be used to develop the main plot and explain all the unanswered questions. You need to be smart with how you write and be realistic about it. If you know you only have 12 episodes and a lot of work to be done on the main characters and their relationship, don't waste your time on side characters and plotlines.

THARN'S CHARACTER
I know he has a lot of supporters and many people were extremely protective over him and hated Type quite a lot with how he treated Tharn. That said, while Tharn was quite a nice and sweet guy in the second half of the drama, the first few episodes showed him as a creep who disregards any type of personal space and is willing to sexually harass someone just to get back for the name calling.

Many people may claim that giving someone hickeys without a consent or rather being fully aware the person would not agree to it, is not a big deal, but it is. They were not friends back then, not a couple. Type was asleep after getting drunk. Imagine that you woke up one day and it turned out that some guy you knew, but did not have a good relationship with, gave you hickeys all over your neck and upper torso. Do you find it cute? Romantic? Innocent? I would either call the police or inform my professors about it.

Also, what kind of sane person instead of punching a homophobic asshole says they will screw him? What's in the brain of that man? I would not want to touch a guy like Type with a stick. Kissing him as revenge, giving him hickeys. It's so amazingly illogical I cannot even try to grasp what was going on. All the touching of Type's face and giving him forehead kisses when he was asleep (before they were a couple, back at the beginning when Type hated Tharn) were not romantic. It was gross and weird and inappropriate.

What also amazes me about Tharn, is how not observant and ignorant he is about the feelings of people around him. How he failed to see Lhong was sabotaging all of his relationships? How could he not see the frantic behaviour of Tar when he came to see him, which obviously would lead to the conclusion something is not right? How he ignored Type’s mental struggles and instead of educating himself about the symptoms of his mental health issues, he ignored them.

TYPE'S CHARACTER
Since I'm planning to write in more detail later on about all the mental health issues, I'll just focus on how his character was written. From the beginning there was not much thought put into developing the characters and showing their gradual change and how it happened - as a result, Type’s character is extremely inconsistent. They bring up his trauma and homophobia when it fits the storyline, forget about it when they want to progress the sexy scenes and at the end of the day, nothing makes sense. Even not taking into consideration his hatred for gays, he was not a nice, lovely and a good guy that I would root for. He was an asshole, way too impulsive and had close to zero redeeming qualities. I failed to see why I should cheer for him and his happiness when I simply did not like him as a human being.

MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES
Total disregard of any mental health topics in this drama frustrates me so bad it's exhausting to watch. Let's start with Type being sexually assaulted as a child by a pedophile, in the present times, having phobia and generalized hatred towards gays and PTSD that was miraculously cured by the power of love and blowjobs. No mention of him going to a psychologist or psychiatrist. No previous treatments as a child.

This leads to Tharn's inappropriate behaviour towards Type when he had panic attacks. If you are the clear reason for someone's panic attack and they tell you to let them go in a hysterical manner, you don't hug them closer to you, you let them go and bring help. There is a reason why rape victims are treated by medical staff of the opposite gender than the person who attacked them, why the police officer are not of the same sex as the attacker. The scenes with Tharn being the cause for the panic attack AND the one that calms Type’s down (sometimes with quite sensual touches) just shows how not willing to do any type of research on the topic the writer was.

Episode two, the scene where Tharn almost sits on top of Type, being angry about Type insulting his father - first Tharn is trying to annoy and make Type angry, when Type starts to have panic attack and begs him to let him go, Tharn says “I just want to help you relax. Calm down” as he caresses his face and tight in a clearly sensual manner, Type gets even more anxious still begging for Tharn to let him go and not hurt him. At some point, finally Type is able to move and he kicks Tharn away from himself to which Tharn says “What the hell is wrong with you, Type?” and I want to ask: What the hell is wrong with the person who wrote this scene? If you fail to see how disturbing and wrong and weirdly written this scene is, I have nothing to tell you.

That said, not all of Tharn’s reactions to Type’s attacks were wrong. When Type woke up in the middle of the night and he himself grabbed Tharn and hugged him, it was a good decision to hug him back and with a calm voice make him feel more at ease. This was one of the instances when I was nodding my head thinking - the boy is slowly learning what is appropriate and what is not. The joy was usually short lived though.

The whole PTSD, panic attacks and all the mental health related issues Type had are gone by the time he and Tharn are together. Why? Because they have no purpose to the main romantic plot anymore. They were just tools to make the romance more angsty, be a good excuse for Type’s hatred towards gays and make “steamy scenes” more “steamy”. After all that, without any professional help, by some random miracle, Type was cured. Why exactly do we need mental health professionals when you can just cure your problems with one good blowjob?

The writers also make Tharn look like an extremely self centered person who is not willing to learn and research about the serious topic concerning the person he claims to love. While his lack of proper reaction could be partially an excuse before he knew about Type’s past, after he found out, the fact there was not even one proper serious talk about it amazes me. Not even once Tharn asked if Type often has the panic attacks, how he should act when it happens, if he tried to get professional help. Nothing. The topic is gone and not mentioned again.

Tar’s depression, suicide thoughts and how the heck no one noticed it for so long? I refuse to believe that his brother did not even once come to his room before that one accidental time in the middle of the drama. It’s close to impossible for him not to know how bad his brother’s mental health is, seeing how he wasn’t truly trying to hide it well. Tar was also the only character that was mentioned to receive mental health help from a psychiatrist, how good the help was is a totally different issue. His character is still better “treated” by the writers than Type. They at least tried to show different symptoms of depression and all the more realistic implications it might have.

Lhong’s story is another way of explaining bad behavior by giving a character a tragic past. While I kind of appreciate the additional episode and the background info on Lhong, I’d say it was an amazing waste of time. Good 70% of the time in the episode was just flashbacks to what happened in the previous episode and just a few new scenes showing Lhong’s past. Why not use that time to truly develop and dive deep into this character’s motivation? He obviously had huge mental health issues, yet again, they are not being addressed by anyone.

Both Lhong and Tar should be in observation in the hospital for some time, since they are either a danger to themselves or to others. I guess, mental health help is a concept that does not exist in the universe created by the writer.

San’s love for Tharn when they were younger was quite disturbing too. The idea that he wanted to take Tharn’s virginity because he was young, cute and innocent just sounds wrong for me. Those are the adjectives you use to describe a child. I have no idea how old Sad was when their relationship happened, but it did sound alarming to me.

WHAT I LIKED
I must say, I kind of enjoyed some fluffy scenes of Tharn and Type. I had to force myself to ignore and try not to remember all the stuff that happened in the first half of the show, but when I was able to do that, the scenes were quite cute. I liked the domestic scenes when Type was playing with Tharn hair. I guess I enjoyed their interactions the most in episode 10. Truth to be told, I would not mind this drama that much, or even like it, if the writer did not introduce the topic of sexual assault on the minor and mental health issues that follow. It was just so poorly written, I cannot ignore it.

My favorite character was for sure Techno. He was one of the best written and most realistic ones. Also, probably the only one without huge trauma and mental health issues. I enjoyed most of his scenes and Mild acting was quite good.

One scene that stood out for me was when Type was confronted by his friend after that friend confessed he is gay. It was a well written and well filmed scene. I just wished there was a follow up, since it was an amazing opportunity for Type’s character growth.

It’s important to add: the last episode was a MESS. Like… “how is Lhong not in prison” was the only thing on my mind when I was watching it. I could not focus on anything else.

Overall, the quality of the production was not bad, the acting was good, the chemistry between characters was nice, the music was fine, the technical aspects were well thought through… The writing… was tragic. Did I over-analyze it? Probably. Some might say I should not try to dig deep into this drama since it’s just a romance BL and they are not supposed to be taken this seriously. I would like to say though, the author themselves introduced those deep, tragic and thought provoking themes in it, so I cannot be blamed for taking it too seriously. I cannot ignore such a bad representation. It would make me feel guilty.

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Uncanny in all the best ways. Painful in the most beautiful ways.

Not gonna lie - the whole show made me feel extremely uncomfortable more than once. Escapism in the purest and scariest form. Heaven never sounded more like hell. The truth is, happiness only exists in contrast to sadness. You can only cherish what will eventually cease to exist.

Sci-fi is a genre that’s extremely hard to ace. You either don’t get enough information to understand it and get immersed in the created world, or the creators overexplain everything, and it seems like a wikipedia page. Yonder managed to keep the balance from start till the end. They gave enough exposition through dialogues to make sense of the sci-fi elements, but they also used a lot of visuals and simple storytelling to explain and expand the rest.

The core of the show though is its philosophical theme centering around happiness, grief and meaning of existence. My brain hurts after watching it. It invites you to dwell on so many complex issues that are hard to grasp just by watching - it made me want to think about them more, even after the episodes ended. What is happiness? How can we achieve it? What gives life meaning? How to deal with grief? Can one get prepared for death? Not to mention the whole ethical side of exploiting people’s pain dressed up as compassion and the selfish and egocentric side of humans.

On the storytelling side - they did an amazing job with pacing. Each scene was meaningful, nothing was dragged, almost nothing felt rushed (on that “almost” under spoiler comment below). The show just flows so well. I would say, it seems better as a binge watch, treating it like a long movie. The breaks between episodes might slightly take one out of the immersion. I honestly regret starting it right when it aired, instead of watching it all when it finished.

Performances - from phenomenal to not memorable. That said, some characters were not exactly written with much depth, and only served a purpose of pushing the plot forward (mostly Hacker Park and the doctor working with them).

Shin Ha Kyun… This man. How is this even possible for him to keep surprising me with his skill? Where’s the limit to his talent? No words to describe his delivery of the character.

The choice of the songs perfectly elevated all the scenes. Did I cry? Yes, many times.

Production value was top notch. Yonder is like a beautiful art piece. Loved everything - the angles, the lighting and use of colors, the proper use of close up and slow motion, the camera rotation that were never overused. The subtle and well designed special effects.

There was one element of the conclusion/reveal by the end that I did not exactly like. It was well written and integrated to the story - it was just my personal preference for the show not to include it. I like when the shows that create an existential crisis in me keep things more open and vague - left to my own personal interpretation. But what I’ve got was a more solid answer to one question, that somehow felt like a contradiction.

Overall, I truly loved it. It’s for sure a show that needs to be analyzed and watched with brain on. Not because it’s so complex plot wise, or hard to understand. Rather, because it tackles many serious issues and questions that are worth asking yourself, and finding out what is your answer.

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