P Lam

My least favorite of the 3 is YS. So full of himself. His teacher is just ridiculous. Wax poetry on a love that he himself lost by entangling with another woman. Yet now decides he can’t live without her and wants to see her. Dude, too late, she is happily married. But that might be a lesson for the other 2 men to not keep the women they love waiting…. So glad CSS called him a narcissistic jerk ( teacher’s face was so funny) on the sly as he told the story ( he says it’s not him but everyone knows it’s his story of how he and his fiancée’s (3rd aunt) got broken. And love how LBY and LY agreed and supported CSS. So that’s CSS’s dear 3rd aunt’s story. I just love 3rd aunt and uncle. If CSS and LY were to marry, they’d be like 3rd aunt and uncle. LY is so pure and lovable. Although I’m rooting for CSS to be with LBY, I’m so glad CSS has LY at this time in her life. Her first suiter is someone so sweet, gentle and good to her. Ep 15 and 16 have many funny moments. Her idea of intimacy is ‘clear the land and build a house with the husband’. LOL.

Yes, LBY looks so magnificent and lethal in his black and gold with a little red peeking out from his cape outfit.

You should watch her in untouchable Lovers. She is secondary lead to Guang Xiao Tong and Song Weilong but she only appears in the 2nd half the story. Her character is unsavory and unhinged. She played the character so well, I hated her so much.

But he can be very thoughtful - example s not searching the Wan mansion for the map and executing the Wan family and Cheng family through association. He also did not search her carriage in ep 1.

Good to know. Thx.

Yes 1 daughter and I thought I would die when she was a teenager so even if I punished her and I did, I wouldn’t ever use food or sleep. I was more anxious if she didn’t eat or sleep because I was worried for her health. I only had one shot and I must say I wasn’t good at it so. I really empathize with the difficulty of parenting but CSS’s mum seem so barbaric and I could not reconcile her behavior with what a caring mother should be vs her treatment of YY. Her character seem off somehow . So now I see how her character is written and can just enjoy the drama without having to really understand the mother. But I am happy to raise an independent and strong daughter even though that independence came back to bite me for a few years. I also grew up in a society and time when parents caned their children. The book maybe different from the drama but the core of the story is mostly the same as is the characters with a bit of tweaking. I like to know the motivation behind each of the characters. And I am sure the screenwriters would have consulted the author for more acurracy and depth rather than wildly build a different character. That would change the story.

So true

Yes think where have all the women warriors gone? If you saw A dream of splendor or especially Marvelous Women (Qing dynasty). you will see how oppressed the women were. I’m thankful I don’t live during those times. I read that Confucius had a lot of good ideals but they were very detrimental to women and set them back.

I thought she ate it because she may not get another one but your friend’s explanation is more deep. I like.

But Niao Naio’s mother was also afraid of being called unfilial. I think there is punishment from the emperor if a person is known to be unfilial. That was why she left her daughter behind because she didn’t want a reputation of being unfilial. As always,she did not listen to her husband who wanted to take all children with them. He has a way of weaseling out of his mother’s clutches but it’s always XYY’s way or the highway. And you know, sons can always win their mothers over, daughter-in- law no unless the daughter in law is a princess and the mother in law is scared of her. It’s my husband who told me this and it is so true. So in traditional Chinese families, let the son bring up sensitive issues and the daughter in law sit back and observe.

That’s so funny!

I think CSS’s mum was privileged. Read or heard somewhere because something happened to her Xiao family, she had to marry beneath her. Her mother in law also said she was a divorcee. Also in one of the early episodes CSS dad told her he didn’t like learning when young, and he was 30 before her mum taught him to read and write. During that time, my understanding is very few people in China can read and write and it’s unusual for women to be literate. Maybe someone who read the book can say more about the background of the mother

I don’t think that is helpful. Her mother already thinks the worse of her. Like the desk incident, she explained why she needed the desk and everyone collaborated that it’s not her fault but mum thinks she is just talking back and defying her. Mom would like it if she is meek and submissive and just say, ‘yes mother’ and kowtow

I no longer wonder about the mother. About 3 hours ago, I posted a video and summary in English why her mother is the way she is. Questions answered, I won’t ask or wonder anymore.

They moved elsewhere. I was shocked when I heard because I heard all along the house was going to be theirs when the parents died.

It is not a preference. We know her flaws but she is only 15 years old, need guidance, explaining of rules, education, explaining of how the world works not pure punishment, some very unfair. Mother is how old? Supposedly a woman who knows better, well educated, thought her husband to read and write, but can’t handle a 15 year old, her own flesh and blood? Or she just can’t be bothered with the effort? I commend her for treating YangYang well so she knows how to do it if she wants to. Even if I were to punish my daughter, I would never withhold food and sleep from her if she didn’t study. I am very curious, would you or anyone else?

Yes, in Chinese culture, sons traditionally take care of parents but in the 20th century and now, a lot of parents go with daughters because the daughter in law takes care of her family. So for the traditional Chinese family, they feel shameful to die at daughter’s house even though it had been the daughter taking care of them all along. Re inheritance, the parents can draw up wills on how assets are divided. It is not uncommon to give sons a big portion and the daughters small portions though the daughters take care of the parents. I know it is happening here and now and I live in the US but I grew up in SE Asia and my husband is from Honk Kong. I don’t know how it is inChina where for many years there is a one child policy. But I know because of that, there are way more males than females so I heard it’s hard for men to find wives. I know of a relative living in SE Asia where when the parents died, the youngest son and daughter in law who took care of them for decades did not get the house they all lived in. The eldest brother just took it over because he was the eldest. Even parents told everyone before they died they wanted youngest son and daughter in law to have it but alas, they left no will.

Right, each child responds differently. CSS’s dad is so different but has has no say. His wife makes all the decisions and I mentioned before, she doesn’t listen to him at all and I have not seen her giving him any affection. CSS was also bullied by her aunt and grandma for not being poor but because they wanted to get back at her mother. The good thing about her childhood hardship is it made her strong when she encountered worse horrors later. For example in Hua City.
We’ll also see how the empress handles her later.

I agree totally!

Yes, being from Chinese family, I have seen it with my own eyes. Boys have preferential treatment. Even when a woman says she is not partial to boys, her actions and speech shows she is. There are examples of parents living with daughters but on deathbed goes back to the son’s house to die to save face. Or the daughters end up taking care of the parents and the sons just lend ‘moral support’ but most of the inheritance goes to the sons.