AmirTH

i don't know if you've seen drama or not yet but since it is not deleted yet, I'll answer your question
it's given two versions in the end both BE and HE to satisfy everyone, but if you want to logically look at the events of the drama it's a BE.
if you want me to spoil it more than this feel free to ask

thank you, a healthy mains relationship. in recent years seems like this phrase has turned into what a ML can or should do for FML. I'm not against it it's completely fine by me, I'll tell you one of the greatest joys in a mans life is seeing his woman happy, but what about FML? what is she doing in that relationship? she just exists and the man is ready to die for her?
my question is what these selfish FMLs bring to that relationship?

I've watched , I remember the overall of the drama but unfortunately I can't remember the details :) it seems like I've forgotten to rate it as well

this drama had a different kinda FML
first the drama was perfect, loved it and main leads had great chemistry
now about FML, in the era of boss girls and self centered FMLs she was a good one. in this era almost 80 percent of FMLs are mostly talks, we are no less than men, this sentence is ALL OVER their entire drama and then they humiliate a man to show they're right again and again if this happens in some dramas it's ok we say they're doing it to some incapable or wicked but this is happening in almost every major drama we see, in these dramas women are usually seen as angels even if they are part of the bad guys their reason is ALWAYS JUSTIFIED this shows it seems like some writers have grudges against men in general!
NOW in this drama again we saw the 'we are no less than men' phrase again BUT the difference was first it wasn't said in every single episode like they're forever stuck in a slogan mode second FML did her job or duty RIGHT and by doing that she proved her point she didn't compete or tried humiliate others. If you seen GOT Remember when Tywin said: Any man who must say, "I am the king" is no true king. It's something like that. Do what you're good at others if they're wise enough will know your worth.
Now if we move on to the relationship of main leads
Before FML, ML had one goal, survive. After he saw her he began to take more responsibilities he tried to be better he wanted to be a good emperor.
Other girl boss FMLs are like I wanna do this if you don't like it, it means you don't support me then we're done, IF this is in the BEGINNING of the show, it's ok you've JUST met and you're not there yet BUT this happens usually when the drama is well advanced or in later stages of dramas when they've gone through all kinda ups and downs. In THIS stage being SELFISH like that is too much.
FML in this one was WAY better bcs she understood ML. She considered her and his situation and They found a purpose TOGETHER and they tried to reach a certain goal together.
Being a queen of a country isn't for everyone and SHE deserved it UNLIKE other FMLs.

thank you

thank you

I'm on ep9, it showed 15 years ago he was much younger and was waiting for a transmigrated heroine, but I remember in EP1 he told her I was transmigrated just 2 hours ago, they showed this scene like nothing serious, but it's clearly doesn't match, unless he lied to her in their first meeting, am I right?
(PLS Don't spoil just say yes or no)

First of all sorry for the delay I'm on a trip i can't stay online for long.

By harm I meant when you switch those past roles to these new ones there comes expectations from women to men, the expectations that will never come true and when they don't you're gonna call us jerk or ... Why? Bcs in some dramas you saw women like this who just by existing was enough of reason for the man to go to hell and comes back for them, this is the harm I'm talking about.

And yes the emotional neglect or unreciprocated sacrifice was indeed wrong in real world (which btw was not in ALL the cases) so now you want to make it right or you want revenge and make it into gender war? Take your stand

About the imbalance you say in the dramas, they are AT THE START OF the drama or when the relationship has JUST BEGUN and it's usually in dramas where FML first chases ML tagged dramas, not in the middle or at the end of the drama where they've been through hell and came back. In the first usually the plot is FML chases ML, gets tired there comes a love rival, ML feels threatened and wants the FML back (this is another whole scenario that I hate too unfortunately:) I mean if without a love rival you can't see her value better not be with her at all)
But HERE(this drama) is the second one and completely nonsense if you're emotionally neglect or ... After ALL THIS TIME then you're a person who don't deserve love at all.

Look you constantly say in history there was something and now men should feel that pain too it seems like you don't want a good harmonious relationship, you're looking for superiority of women over men or even revenge. If that's the case then what can I say good luck.

I KNOW it was his choice and I'M NOT against it, Making sacrifices in relationships aren't a bad thing—it’s actually beautiful. But if one person is told, like absolutely never, to sacrifice for the other, and everyone’s fine with that, while the other person still sacrifices for them… that’s just not okay. That is what yourself called it unreciprocated sacrifice. If you want revenge against men, yes that is another way to go.

Yes the characters are flawed but Another problem is flaws of the FML are seen as an ok or normal thing like she is some kind of a saint or know it all peraon and in real world you expect a man to do what ML did here when you yourself show the FML mentality in relationship it NEVER works, then call men names.

the examples are many, 'only for love' is another one

and by barking like a dog I didn't mean what you wrote
I meant ML is at back and call of the FML if she says go right he sees nothing but right he is ready to do it anytime, what about FML? that whole situation is ok and even a good thing if FML is ready to do the same but she isn't! this series for example, whenever FML was in a tough spot, needed help with something wether she said it or not he was there IMMEDIATELY and what happened when just ONE TIME ML had to leave bcs of an emergency and there was no news of him? what did she do? NOTHING. his letter were intercepted by the butler, did she think to herself by the character of ML it's impossible for him to leave without saying a word? NO. one whole month passed and no news of him did she asked what happened to him? is he in trouble? again NO.
Finally she went to capital not bcs of ML because of her family's mess. did she ask where the ML is or what is going on with him? NO:)) if the servent of ML wouldn't have tell her about him and begged her to please come and save him in one million she would never do that. 2 times if I'm not mistaken she was asked if what you're doing is bcs of ML first she said I've come to take care of the mess of my family, second she said I'm here cause I don't let go of anyone who mess with Rong family. because of all the reasons that I mentioned, I believe her. we are not talking about the start of the relationship when one party is chasing another, we are talking about 33 EPISODES in the drama when he was in the middle of a crisis she was thinking how can I get rid of him once it's over. what did she do all those times that her relatives especially that cousin of hers constantly talking behind ML except one time(when she was doubting whether kill the ML or not) did she defend him? NO. it's laughable and ridiculous.
her care for ML was like the care of a FRIEND not a LOVER.
That is the reason why I'm saying he was barking like a dog.

Sacrifices in relationships are inevitable and if it is showed in movies they carry emotional weight it must be shown, but it should go both ways. Compare When it is said to men don't throw your future for a women and when it's said to woman the exact same thing. For first everyone thinks those word are gibberish the audience the characters and the director, BUT for the latter it's not!! It's shown as an ok thing, don't throw your future for a man and a bad thing if a man don't throw away his ambition and future for a woman like he is a jerk or not worthy of love or something like that.(Now tell me how do you view them???) The problem is here, this is the double standard that I'm talking about and you call this overcorrection and think is acceptable? :)
I'm not against this sacrifice. It is OK if one side does it and the other doesn't. But It is impudent way of thinking that it's unacceptable for me to do that but think it's ok others do it for me.
Men and women are not the same, I know that. We have to be treated equal based on our differences, but you want more than that AS you said. Sorry that's not acceptable and it's not gonna happen, this is why this kinda dramas are specially design for viewers like you to live in that fantasy.
Again I said it, something was wrong in the past, CORRECT it. You want to switch the roles of past mistakes and call it a simple 'overcorrection' with no harm? No that's a double standard

The only cliche that it seems like it's not gonna get old is every single FML in c-dramas should've been betrayed by her ex, are you kidding?
not a single one of them couldn't break up due to a reason not involving the man having an affair?

yes it is (I'm on ep12), but the point is he isn't doing it bcs he loves her he doesn't, he is doing it first bcs of his lust second bcs he want to take revenge on FMLs brother.
I HOPE he understands in later eps what he is doing is wrong and he has to respect FML.
so for bcs there is NO love then these force kisses aren't shown as an OK thing to do they are just some hot scenes to attract attention. when he finally loves her and he still doesn't respect her that's a really bad red sign.

I had problems with this drama but I was ok with it UNTILL EP33 when FML is looking for a good way to cut ties with ML forever and in EP34 ML begging to be loved and no one's gonna love him :))
when will this girl boss era in c-dramas end?
honestly girl bosses are cool too nothing wrong with them but overdoing it to the point men barking like dog for them, that's really disturbing
p.s. I finished the drama it's interesting for me how in ESPECIALLY historical dramas the show men priorities romance and love, throw their future out of the window and women priorities career, so this is the balance you're looking for?
somethings used to be wrong to correcting it you should balance it not do the EXACT opposite.

so couple weeks later she slept with a stranger and you call that someone who knows her selfworth :)))
she LOVED him?? what is your definition of love exactly? what she did doesn't exactly define as being in love with someone, go look it up in dictionary
some of you women are really scary

it's funny how I say she should've communicated with him you say he should've been more understanding of her, I guess Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus after all, aren't they? :))
conflicts in relationships are normal we just know they had a couple of them before nothing more than that, you say she reached saturation point, I don't think so. if that is true then tell me why did she wanted the marriage?
if the relationship was strong enough for her to want the marriage it doesn't make sense to me she throw it ALL away for that reason alone. in the drama they kept saying he was a guy who would do whatever she wanted for her
look I'm looking for an answer I put myself in his showes, what if I put my energy and emotion in someone she gets bored (in this case she really gave me the feeling she was bored she just used what he said as an excuse to break up ) call it quits, then what? what's the point? the sleeping with someone else part is just icing on the cake

Is your mentality men are the problem and women are victim? At this point I'm just keep repeating my words
I did say he made a mistake, I didn't put all the blame on her.
Don't put words in my mouth, I didn't say women ONLY want communication and understanding. He is simple, if she wants something I'll give it to her, even if he is not himself ready for it.
Now what did she do? You know it!!
If you want something tell your man WHAT you want, men are not mind readers. If he can't provide it for you HEAR his reasons it's either acceptable or not, then decide what you wanna do, THIS is communication. (Absolutely the opposite is fine too, I mean if a man wants something from a woman)

one question, did you even read my comment thoroughly?
he is not a jerk who after dating a woman says sorry marriage is off the table, I told you he has a problem. instead saying why you feel that way or what's the problem she breaks up with him and sleeps with someone else. reminder he is not just someone who she met for couple months, he is a man who she was planning on marrying, means they were in a deep enough relationship.
In relationship didn't women want understanding and communication? now is it sooo hard to ask what's the problem in these situations? Or you are the exception?

did I say she didn't? but over what and why? it was her FIANCE and he WAS a good guy
I completely explained in my comment why what she did is morally wrong

about the second couple I saw an edit on insta and how women were all cheering for SJS (first crush of ML) for her new relationship and bashing NJS (brother of ML), but why exactly?
a man who is mentioned AGAIN AND AGAIN in the drama would do whatever she wants for her.
one of them said he talked about marriage like he's doing her a favor, no it wasn't at all like that from pov of a man, he said it like that because he wasn't ready for it the way he said it wasn't pleasant, I agree. she should've cancelled the wedding, again I agree. BUT breaking up with him over this and sleeping someone else just a few weeks after her cancelled wedding is REALLY TOO MUCH.
she was right, she indeed cheated on him and he didn't deserve that. I just can't imagine if the roles were reversed and a man did all the things she did and instead of communicating with HIS FIANCE and talking to her he just gives up everything and sleep with someone else. how would everyone react???
NO ONE is perfect he made a mistake in telling his fiance how he actually felt, what happened after was not fair.
if something is wrong, it is wrong for everyone just because she is a woman , it doesn't give her the excuse to do whatever she wants, this is morally wrong.
(I'm in ep8 I don't know what is gonna happen later for NJS I just hope he meets someone better)