Blackrabbit63

I agree with you. It's a Lovers bug!!! Not friendship in any way or manner. Love. The bug only works if there is love in the partner's heart - in both their hearts.

I think we are seeing XY begin to grow up now that she has seen who her parents were, and that they loved her. She couldn't mature until she faced that trauma, which we faced with her - and CX, who shares much of the same trauma. Part of LYF is watching both of them learn how to get over being abandoned (or not get over it, in CX's case).
Also, XY's purpose was not to study poison initially. She has been a healer for a couple of centuries now. As well as a specialist in poisons. It was interesting to see her mother was also a healer in her private life. XY learned the poisons to save her life while in the cage with the 9-tailed fox demon, which saved her life, from the medical book her mother planted in her.
XY is no longer a princess officially of Haoling, so she no longer has those responsibilities that A'Nian has. She is a commoner who is the daughter of the Princess General of Xiyan. She no longer has to help CX as he has achieved everything (almost) that he set out to do, and is no longer in "danger" as he was before. I like that she has taken what she was good at as a man, and is doing it now for herself in her true form as a female. She's working in medicine, helping heal others and creating the encyclopedia for everyone. What else would you like her to do? She also took control and cleared Jing's name and conspiracy to kill him. This also coincidentally left Jing free to pursue her again. Another way that she saves him. It's not dramatic action like A'Nian, but I also have great difficulty seeing A'Nian suddenly wielding a sword when she has never shown any interest in any kind of martial arts/warfare before. I am glad A'Nian has matured, that was fun to see. And she did it for her father and her people. But XY's position is very different now from A'Nian's.
XY getting to choose her love in the end, is a form of victory in LYF, where almost no one of any of the characters, gets to be with the one they love.

I've read through all this post by you, as this is something I've been asking myself too. I think it is loyalty to his comrades, alive and dead, as well as being saved by the General and offering him undying loyalty. So he would think it is his duty to remind the general of what they set out to do. I too, wish very much XL could recognize the battle is over, has been over, and that some of the army and people still exist, so they have survived. But I am not sure survival is their aim. So then I don't know what they are fighting for, even if they swear they will never give up the battlefield. Sigh. This is how he loses XY, in the end.....I too struggle with him not letting himself love XY while he is alive, and letting her know he loves her, too. But the author chose for him to love nobly, sacrificing himself without her knowing, which I don't like even though I love his character! lol Nothing is clear in this drama, so many shades of gray, which is also why I like it so much. There is a lot of complexity to work out 😊A drama about different kinds of love.

No worries! I thought FFYY was executed! I really thought she was supposed to die at the altar.....
I also forgot that halfway through ep 17 Grandpa and CX are talking about FFYY being in QS Town! lol the ending of the episode made me forget almost everything before it. And it happened so fast I didn't take in that suddenly FFYY was there, out of the altar spirit draining place, and what it meant. Jing, oh Jing, your soft heart. Couldn't he find a better place to put her? If she's supposed to be dead, having her in the world is not very clever....hoping the next few episodes will explain a little more.
I agree that after everything is over, the world will be a safer place for XY and Jing. 6 episodes to get there, though.....both happy we are arriving at the end so we can see how this drama ends, and sad because I love these characters and story so much.

Thank you for explaining the difference between the novel and the drama. I am saving the novel for when LYF finishes airing. 😄 I guessed that the novel was more clear on how it was all set up. So like you, I guess we have to wait until the next few episodes to see if it is all cleared up in the drama. I said earlier that LYF is one of my favourite dramas, so I consider this a blip on what is otherwise almost spotless plotting and writing. I'm sick also this weekend, and I think seeing the last part of Ep 17 was so shocking I forgot everything that happened earlier in the episode! Including that CX and Grandpa knew FFYY was alive and in QS Town. I'm not sure what they are going to do between Xinyue and CX, from ads for the next episodes, it seems CX is guilty....and my CX heart is going to break....

Me too, I love the characters. Even Jing, even if I have problems understanding his decisions (with FFYY in particular). I know XY loves him, and I want my girl to be happy at the end. I'm very curious to see what the last 6 episodes contain. I have loved, and love, this show and characters. The OST is on my playlist too.

Lol I love your response, Kokuto: "but he [Jing] has some super guards, which they never really showed being super guards, but Hou had even more super guards, who took out Jing's guards." "Regardless, Jing left his brother alive TWICE with hardly any punishment, after Hou tortured him, tried to kill him AND tried to seduce XY -- oh, and murdered his wife, but who cares about that? At least FFYY didn't do anything against XY." My answer: give me CX every time. CX would know how to deal with FFYY and Toushan Hou.....
"TBH, I thought Jing had actually sentenced FFYY to death when he made the deal with her to keep the kid safe, in exchange for her allowing the Tushan Fox god to slowly suck all her vitality and spirit power out of her. But apparently, it wasn't ALL her vitality and then he allowed her to go live in Qing Shui Town with the kid?" At least it wasn't just me who thought this, I really did too.
I want Jing to be as clever as the writer and everyone says he is. So I ask why would he ever let FFYY go to the one place in the world that is XY's retreat - Qing Shui Town? There has to be a deserted island somewhere in the ocean that is better to hide FFYY on.

How do we know he officially divorced her? Thanks for the pointer to the scene in question, I went and watched it again. 😊
The Tushan clan put out the fake claim FFYY died of an illness....Kokuto is right, below, there would be a record that FFYY was alive then if he got a divorce. There's no mention at anytime that he divorces FFYY. Just that she is sent to the altar to give her life force over. So the clan is lying to everyone....faked a person's death...and are going to let Jing fake marry XY?
I'm not worried about the future world in LYF, I'm worried about current time when FFYY is still alive!! lol At the very least Jing should have had someone guarding her secretly. I still can't believe he let her go to the village with her son. I mean she's an assassin....he may be the world's most forgiving fox, but he is also supposed to be clever. How could he not be watching her secretly with guards forever after?

So did I, think that FFYY was sentenced to death at the altar. So how she ended up at the village confused me, since we last saw her going to the altar. Still confused over how FFYY's fake death could mean Jing could marry XY....wouldn't that mean Jing's marriage to XY would never be legal if anyone found out? somehow the wedding FFYY and Jing had that was legal before, isn't legal now? I'm worried about my girl XY and her love lying to her....

Can anyone explain why Jing kept FFYY alive? I am trying to believe that Jing is worthy of XY, but considering all the ways FFYY harmed Jing- she almost fatally poisoned him - why didn't he have her killed? It's sounds terrible, but if he can't protect himself, how can he protect XY? How could he not strategize defenses against FFYY if he knew she was alive? he had no one watching her? Or Tushan Hou? Most of LYF has been outstanding, but this plot point is confusing. We should have had a scene earlier where we see that he lets her live. Does that mean he divorced her so he could marry XY? How was that going to work? All moot anyway since FFYY is now really dead, but this whole scene and plot point is weird. Although part of me wonders if CX knew, and paid Tushan Hou and FFYY this time to kill Jing, now that would make sense....

LOL! And no!!!! I am still frothing at Jing forgiving FFYY, what the heck was that? I'm so mad at that character! If he loves XY so much, how could he forgive all the time and pain FFYY caused him and XY? She tried to kill him!! Tricked him into marriage, lied to him, tried to kill CX, ...... So basically anyone can do anything wrong and Jing will forgive them. Grr. Give me CX every day. "Jing Pure Heart" I felt bad when he had the sword go through him, but also hope he is dead. There, I said it! Why oh why is he so unable to protect himself and XY???????

LOL! Yes, XL is selfish - I'm probably the only person watching this show who is so angry at XL for not telling her that he loves her but can't be with her. It's ok that he chooses his path he does, but this idea of selfless love where he does everything and never tells her, annoys me. It is selfless to do it without asking anything in return. But, it's also selfish, as he denies himself and her the chance to have a deeper true relationship, which XY keeps giving him openings for. I'm not saying a grand love affair, but more, they could relate as two beings more fully if he did that. He keeps things from her, selfishly. He can't decide for her what hurts her and what doesn't. I am dreading that he wipes her memory of him like he does in the book. He robs her of her own memories. I'm so mad at this!

Hi Kokuto, I like that we are coming at this from two different angles, too! There are so many ways to watch LYF and relate to what is going on in it. I also agree to the CX transferring his abandonment issues to XY. We are going to see what happens in the coming episodes with him, because he hasn't really worked it out. We're going to watch as he creates his own loss with XY because of that unresolved trauma. He can't lose her, and he can't let her go.
For XY, I want to see her heal too, to progress as a character. You're coming from a military brat background, I'm coming from a complex trauma background - like XY and CX, roots in childhood. It's probably why I related to both and all our characters so well. I don't know that any of our characters will completely heal, but they can certainly grow and have healthy relationships - except for CX, it seems.
An interesting note on this theme, XY's bonds with all her male leads share some form of trauma.
- XL and XY: I can forgive XL some of his initial cruelty and abuse to XY because one he recognizes she had the same experience of being caged as a child, he backs off tormenting and humiliating her almost immediately. That moment when she cringes and curls protectively when he goes to touch her head, was that moment for them. I like how they are both shown as moving past that trauma in their own way - he by learning the language of the slaves in the slave pit, she by having hope and mastering medical knowledge to make poisons - and revealing it to one another. There is a lot of shared trauma and healing in this drama!
- Look at Jing, he was almost dead from his torture and shamed terribly in front of people. And XY can relate to this and him, too. Her own face and identity were hidden in order to survive. So much trauma! And she helps heal him, and I think this is part of their shared bond. I like the reference you make to the skeleton cage - again they are caged - and how he imprisons her further emotionally. Finally he apologizes to her. They both have to, are learning how to love freely.
Sorry this is so long, there is a lot to unpack in this theme in this show, for me, anyway. It's one of my favourite dramas because it doesn't shy away from exploring love, loss, and trauma. A'Nian is like a little fresh air because she is what XY could have been like, if everything hadn't happened to her since she was a child. I would hope that XY would have then grown out of the idea of her mother abandoning her, then! Because maybe in XY's mind, none of the trauma would have happened if her mother had not gone to war. I think eventually, because of what she learns from Jing and the lantern (and I know in the book it is XL who tells her this), that she can begin to reframe the story of what happened to herself and her mother.

YES!!! I think he's an awesome character, especially how he's been portrayed by Zhang Wanyi. Mesmerizing, compelling, and (soon to be) tragic character, in his hands. That dark obsession that his grandpa is trying to steer him from, and even he is is trying not to go towards, but every step takes him further along to the edge...and we are all waiting for it to happen. Sometimes he is heartless towards all this wives, and ruthless in the world, and then he goes all soft with XY and I forgive him. He's made the character come alive and let us give him sympathy for his deep love and bond for XY.

Yes! I agree with this so much. I love all the 4 main characters too. Some issues with hapless Jing but when he's actively doing something he's interesting.... plus XY really really likes him, so, anything for her happiness, including him if that's who she wants 😊

Complex characters + past influences, +good layered plot and writing, mix in trauma, love of all kinds - especially some obsessive love, and family - found and biological = happiness

I think the point of it is that she hasn't had the ability to heal herself yet. Layered trauma is super hard to reach, until it is triggered by something, and then it spills out. Discovering that she had been lied to by everyone she counted on about her parentage broke open all the unresolved trauma from before. It will be healing for her to know, but it doesn't feel like it at the time. It's called complex-ptsd in real life, when there is childhood trauma layered and then adult trauma; don't forget she also died because of who her father was. So I think the writing in this scene is very good and it allows her to share her grief with people who love her, especially CX....so at the very end of it, she is able to say she always wanted to go back to find Xuan, and not go to Jade Mountain. it's the first time she's said that, and CX hears it. It's a healing moment. Only after this, can she start to see what her parents had to do as being responsible to the general world, and not just her as their daughter.

These two did their scenes so well here. Balls of tissue at my end, I couldn't stop crying. So much pathos and heartbreak, loss and abandonment. The heart of LYF, from which the show tracks how they try to live and love from these two big moments in their lives. And then she ends with saying she doesn't want to go to Jade Mountain, she wants to go find Xuan....Perfect way to express how deep XY's bond is with CX, that he is her home.

I also like how each of the 3 MLs have their time with her as she makes this huge discovery about her parentage. Consoling her each in their own way.

This made me laugh! Bat signal! I'm just happily sailing on my three ships and ignoring all the cannon blasts across my bow....Team XiaYao for Happiness

This is perfect, including her getting some alone time! Perfect ending for this show....but then the title wouldn't fit, sadly.....it would be 'Always Beside You" or something like that - Love You Forever. All our ships would be sailing!

I really enjoyed the insight and care with which you have presented everything. I was presenting something which I do relate to in XL, but as I haven't read the novel yet, I don't know if it comes out in this way too there. I'll be reading the novel after S2 finishes airing. I don't think XL is as good as everyone seems to want him to be because he is so selfless towards XY, and the promise he made to the general. I think meeting XY was a surprise to him, and has allowed him - and us - to explore what having a soulmate is like, and that he finds a capacity to be selfless with her. I do think though that he could have picked to have more, and chooses not to. I guess it's a question of what we call soulmate, and how he loves, and she wants to love. I do see elements that he is hurtful to her, in a way that I see frequently in other dramas with male leads, and it bothers me that everyone thinks it's ok without calling it out as being abusive towards her. For me, I am accepting this is part of their master-servant initial relationship, and a theme of power, which eventually he does give to her, and that is beautiful to see. But he is still cruel, and never tells her everything. I know in the novel there is the epilogue and it's beautiful. It makes me cry to think about what he does! I just see his flaws, too, and that he is afraid, not just of hurting her, but also of being hurt himself. Which makes him such an interesting, layered, fabulous character to play. 😊 I like how many of us are so intrigued my this drama that we are analyzing so much of it, too.